The Nebraskan. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1892-1899, April 24, 1896, Image 4

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    Tint I.uto.
The Iiouro Imtl boon nroimotl by n.
Inirnlnr. Mr. JnnoR wuv ix mnn with n
nmsk koIhk throiiRh tho pookotn of Ills
pantaloons, and, quick ns thmiKlit, hu
nhot nt him, Uiu Intruder tnnklim Kood
hla nscnno.
"Why." snld Mrs. Jones, thoroughly
nwnko, "what did you ncnro mo for?"
"I Haw a man robbing my iioekutn
nnd llrod p.t him."
"Well, ho didn't got anything," Bald
nlio, complacontly.
"How do you know?"
"Oh, I trlod 'cm iiiynolt before wo
wont to bod." Ailninn Krooman.
A llUtnrlrnl Item,
Ono day recently, In a Dundoo school,
tho toachor was examining tho class In
history nnd nuked one of tho boys
"How did Chnrles I. die?"
The boy paused for a moment, nnd
one of tho other lads, by way of prompt
ing him. put his arm up to his collar
to signify docnpltntlon.
Hoy N'o. 1 at once grasped, ns he
thought, his friend's meaning nnd ex
claimed, to tho grnt amusement of tho
class: "Please, air. he dltd of cholera."
London Morning Jou.nnl.
An t'ntiinliii- MlnMtcr.
It was one of those coxy vlllnats of
bonnir Scotland, where ftosslp Is tho
chief kilter and church tho calef duty
of evciy "mon" and all tho "woem
in." Tor once gossip and church wero
traveling the Mine wn. for Pougold
McSoiiie. the minister, had suddenly
grotui unpopular, and the numbers of
his ongregatlon were steadily dtmln
ishlni! No one knew better than he that
something must bo .lone, so he con
cluded to do a little house to house mis
sionary work, and tlu arouse more In
terest In church affairs.
But his enthusiasm was short lived.
The first man he accosted was Donald
Cnmrl'oll. a sturdy old Sco of well
know n free-thinking tendencies.
"Tonald." began ihe minister, "for
whj were ye no' at the kirk last Saw
bath -
"I was at Mr. v. Shoutir's kirk,
nieenlster."
This was hardh tin ropl that was
expoetod. but the minister continued,
with nd.ied grait 1 dir.ua like ye
rinuing about the m range kirk 1 this
way. I am palrfvkl sure ye enel'
wldna like yer ain heep slrain' awa
into strange pnstun."
"I widna care a giain. meeulster. gin
It was better gross." -Boston Budget.
AH vA
Don, Camoroii'B lunch counter, Its
South Eleventh street.
U1213 tho llttlo catch-
II With mlttona on
ll his hands,
I a, tromhllng with
III oxcltomont,
rlil llnhlivl tho hnt ho
Htniuls;
And ns ho gives his
ordors,
Ho Rooms to grow
In filzo,
"Como, got sotno ginger In yor!
Two out! Piny ball!" ho cries,
Ho's slondor-httllt nnd wiry,
With frocklcB on his nose.
Could ho throw down to second?
Well, hardly! you'd suppose.
Hut seo how quirk he's snatching
Tho ball from oh tho hat,
Tho runner's surely hontcn
"Hoy, Kmplro. how was tint!"
"Hat hlttlT don't go now. Mttgsoy!"
1 hoar his nngry shout;
"Como In, do gnino Is over;
Do IOmpIro snys yor out!
Yor In tie soup, youie follars;
Wo's bent yer by free runs!
De Victors always gets (lore
We Is do clmm-pp-tins!"
Detroit Free Press.
An Imllentlnii.
trior
sur-
on
j-oung Mr. HTTnoWTtnii.
The ung eople were surprised too.
The M man was the first to recover
his o lU.mlmity and as Miss Xorthstde
foun i Imt f-et he remarked:
"Aii Lucy! I see your race for a
bust nut is neirly over."
"V li.it makes you say that, papa?"
sekfl i h.- girl, blushing painfully.
y.m tit-med to be on the last lap."
Plttti.mg Chronicle.
DR. S. E. COOK EYE. EAR, NOSE'
and throat. Oflloe rooms, 43 and 41
Burr Hlk. Hours, fl-12, 2-3.
ED YOUNG'S
Ciwirnnd News,
1207 O iSlroot.
Telophouo 1.
If ycu set up too late for breakfast
Sunday morning, oome down to Francis
lirctf.' restaurant, 127 no. 11th and get
a plate of cakes aad ooffe. Special of
feT to students for ten days. A ll.lt
ticket for SO cents.
Fnanote brothers, proprietor of Uie
CarutaJ Cafe, have purohassd a new
cof- um ajid are now prepared to
dl--ne a deticlons cup at any time of
nifit.i or day.
3lemmber that Fraele Broa. bava re
op iM the Capital 0. 1X1 Xwtn
Kkn wmh an reel. Sbrt order znoals are
thalT specialty.
F'ur good man an implored at Con
stat) oer's barber stoop, 1M4 O street.
whwe you set the deaaeat shave aad
new eat hair outt
Hot-tine IjiIp In 1.1 fo.
In tho rocontly published life of th
lato Sir K. B. Hnmloy appears ono o4
his facrite storlos. which hns reference
to Capt. Brook, riding master nt the
Cndot college. Brooks wns anxious tc
enter his son nt Wellington college, and
started ono day to walk to tho colloge
from tho station. Scolng Brondmooi
Lunatic asylum, ho confounded tho one
establishment with tho other, wnlkod
up, nnd rang the boll.
Ho asked the porter If ho could see
the principal. Whon the latter ap
peared Brooks thought him a queer
looking figure for an instructor ot
youth. Brooks sold:
"I wish to put iny boy under you!
charge if you can take him."
"Oh. yos," said the man. "Is ho a bud
case?"
"Bad case!" exclaimed Brook. "What
on earth do you mean? There's not a
bottor boy In England. The only thing
I fonr is that he may be too old."
"Why. how old Is he:"
"He is eighteen."
"Pish! wo take tnom up to olghty."
"Why." said Brook again in high
dudgeon, "if ho does not como here till
.eighty, what time do you scnaos? he's
going to get his commission?" Pear
son's Weekly.
A full line of typewriter supplies at
tho Smith TremTer "dice, 135 South
Eleventh street. Tel. H3. C. W. Ecker
man, agent.
Looking Torn-nrd.
The girl pianist in the next flat who
had sprinted ovor the teoih of the tor
ture box for hours at a time was going
to )o married.
The society columns of the Sunday
papers had given it a two-stickful no-
The face of the weary man In the next
flat lighted up with Joy. but as he
looked out of the window and saw a
tired-eyed woman wheeling In a peram
bulator a fat. husky baby, charged full
of holler, cow's milk, baby food and
ugliness, his face hardened, ard he
hissod between his clenched teeth: "Re
venge!" Minneapolis Journal.
Hownrd Thoro goes a modern nrgo
nnut. Algernon Wlint golden ileoco 1b ho
nftor?
Hownrd Old Astorbllt's owo lnmb.
Nebraska Steam Dye
and
Cleaning Works
Gintlimtn's Suits and Overcoats
LADIES' UR1SSS GOODS,
SHAWLS, CLOAKS, KTC.
Cleniied, Dyed, nml Pressed to Kipinl New.
I'nst Colors. Mllltnry Suits Special I'rlCcS.
Hopnlrlui; n Specialty,
Promptly nml Neatly Done.
134 N. 11 Bt. O. U. OAl'ItON, l'rop.
If you want a Suit Made, go to
C. 1'IIIJ'RS,
I51u' Popular (Sailoi
Kopuiring Xontly Dono.
Ovor Wohlonborg's Cigar Sloro
120 South llth St.
C. H. FREY.
Wholesale and Retail
STORE
1131 O ST.
Telephone 503.
GREEN HOUSE
Mill Thrvo ItlorU
South ot South St.
Telephone 572.
3N01S yYOIO XHciV Si.UlV'lD
jaailS WI Wok m
iu (In iSu nujpti
JuiJjD juo pun
ll! A
iSAOa AVS
Roy's Drug Store
Cor. lOth and F Sts
FINE STATIONERY, STUCMTS'ABLETS,
l'oonu.n Pens, Han 1UU Goods. Hummock
Fwliinc T-ckle. Ktc. ,
UKSTlRKAT.Mr.NT. HKST PK1CK.
S. E. KOV, CdT. 10th and P Sts.
i
Nebraska Tent
and Awning Go,
136-8 N. 11 St.
TentM for Itont.
The "Hotel Lincoln,"
IMalter flDooe
. ..PRINTER
1115 P Street, Lincoln
cards, programs. In-
Good Work.
VI-ATIONS
PrifB Reasonable.
I
( i
Thta spneo 13 rosorvotl for II, II. IMorco,
bloyoloa nml bloyolo repairs. Ill No.
13th street, Halter IJlook.
1 11 li i
CAPITAL i
CAFE
HAS BEEN RE-OPENED BY
Francis Bros.
THE MOST CONVENIENT PLACE FOR STUDENTS
OPEN ALL NIGHT.
Oysters and ame in Season. ts
121 North Eleventh Street.
SHORT ORDERS OUR SPECIALTY.
GIVE US A TRIAL.
1W
3icpniriucj 9lcalftj f?ouc.
129 South 12th St.
Have you seen ibm nw ndrt No. 2
Smifh Premier typewriter? If not call
in art 185 South 3!le'nth street and
examine it. C. "W. Bokennajn acont.
Don CuiMrron's lunoh oounter. 118
South Wevmiii street
j WEBSTER'S
i INTERNATIONAL
r
EntirtlyNtv
0 Artatl vtkt Ttmts
0
nwrmvA 7?t
sjls jl v.4,m.ffc.
A Grand durm'fr
flSWai HLA
J uHtMMir of I he
" Unabridged."
The Lincoln news agency, headquar
ters for news, magazines and uovels.
Harper's Century, Munsey'a, Scalbner'e.
Cosmopolitan and other periodicals al
ways In stock. N. E. corner Hlevanth
- RJohard blool J. E.
Slamlurl i Umi
. H. Oo't I'rUrt.
iui:Oflif.tlMr. i
( bi.jT'UK'(oirt aud
i uan ail uio ;
BlJUxil.b. J
Auriul)' im-
mi)(l'(l fry tieiy J
MUit iu"iiuti- $
UWlt US h4JMKllK,
uimI rtlwr lUXucu- t
UirH iiliuoM vJtb- J
out uuiulier.
A College rrcsldrnt wr)te: 'Tor j
' ut. villi vliltli tli lbxlt. Ilie
' word houclit, for amTiriwy of ddflul-
'lluu, for fffottii iix'tltodK in Jndl- 2
cutiiii; iiroiiuiit'Iutloii, for lrM 't
" oiujrii'iilvo Matuiriitu of fuvtn, J
0 " unil for jirm-tlcul umi uh u iiorkluc
i "Ulitliniir.v,MVli-(.rVliirnatlonur
J uxcttU uiiy other hlugle voluiun." $
t The One Great Standard Authority, t
La w4tn.a tin,, It Y 1i... 1....( IT t) 7
G. & C.MEJmiAM CO., I'nhllebere, i
springueja, mum., u.r.a.
i" iiu iu inv iiHiiinunrii lire iriiiiiniiit'i -
cy-Dwuut UuyolMuiii lejirtutnuf nuulwrt odltloni, S
'vwwvvwwwwvwS
LINCOLN, NEB.
your pljotoJ-
12 CABINETS ONLY
$1.00 WORTH $3.00.
Satisfaction Guaranteed.
Call and see Samples.
PIEWiTTj 1216 O St.
30 CENTS OFF
ho M-rlten lion. Ji. 3 llri'wer, JuhUoo V. B.
oujireuit L:oun.
mrm
TWO TRAINS DAILY
DITWEEN
AND
Auburn. Falls City,
Atchison, Si Joseph,
and Kansas City.
City Ticket Office, 1201 0 Street
H. O, TOWHSEUD, Gen'l P. b T. A.
F. D. COBUEI.I., C. P. ft T. A
FOB TEN DAYS Francss Bros, will sell $1.10
coinmutation ticKets to the students for 80
cents. We want to introduce our new throo
of business to the University students Every
uning is nrst class, uur coffee is delicious.
Open all Night. 127 No. 1 1th.
The
Lincoln
Salt Baths. !
fffiLjilJUHi vSs?iiik.
vmffi&raft 'CtG".j:MVi
,r4nJUL,Bi iiJiiULa ' jr
Cor. 14th & M
Streets.
LINCOLN,
NEBRASKA.
OPEN AT ALL HOURS DAY OB NIGHT.
SULPHO-SALINE BATH HOUSE AND SANITARIUM
MUMF2fU, W"b ,'I'-'al "ttlUto ih- Milt
U in "11 drT WiTa'i1 luS.d "'a5"r 0,Yn "J:- ri" ,iatl iu" " E '
u- . t- ",. '! WA'fHI.NO uiuy liiJojxi mull M-tkujiain utsrturu-. muuii tic ui ,i
ler fcwlmiuliiK Pool, MxlM long. S to IV ft W. Ust to wUorm iZj'wut I ",(M ,