SHisssssssiHIisssss wOksMskf TWO TRAINS DAILY Axn- P P' w tv Kt i- . V ft - M J l KI 1 i liUOTT IMPI KSON TOH Mr 1. ih.it w'IIka. his famous i-nt-i-talmn. n;. Ha..-l Klrko." at "Wesley an unlv.rsi: T!uirsln f.ntn Mui.U J. HU amiK 111- bevn m,mUously mi n'sMul .mil flifiUM tMrnmnHlntU'iis ftnn tho ln-st miilirltles. Vrwl Emer v,m Hr.iks ways: "Mimicry would un il.r ui h a lit-: fornmiice he commonplace. Only Inborn renhi, .il:vl ly ! ImiKlniaUl. art. oouM mh- a jierform-aei- t fho jxrf?tl-i Mr EllMt 1.pk." Th.- imbuqiie. la .i Times says: WhiNt .it times irrr. iUbl funny. ihei.- n.-i-r . am turn- u ulnar wirtil'ir i "l.in: a fa ' i li t . In thi-f la .if ImiTi'1i imri1 !inii .-ininn-nil tin juTfoniiamv t .'U .ir f i r." H.-nirv It. WViil'im.' will ffivi- li inwi. "t Wmrv in ,)..il An emmlni'iit Hvlm- in ihe .-Hut wi "1 wnultl nwhi-r , !' ihf aulh.ir of that lecture on 'The I Mnn of Galilee' than of nny human pro ilucuon tliat I have i Mr heunl Anil from the lipH -if any living man " ! Joseph Cook. "It is brIUhint iiiitl I powerful n fascination and an Inspira tion. The American lyceum am boast no greater orator t lmn Wondllnj;." . A ticket entitling the lioldor to both j these lectures ami a resarvod scat costs only SO cents. SlnRle admission 86 cents. ' Special cars will lie on O street at 7 o'clock to ca-r the crowd out niHl back. The reserved tt an- goiitff fast: Ret yMir befori" the are sjvme. Two university boy started for M.'mo i Friday evmlnft- They intend tn bu land wblcfi can be used foi KTMninjr coffee. The rrlli Trrinlili d. "Ah!" The shock passed away and the world r.as quiet, "Evidently" He pazed with wonder upon the curi ous formations of rock which the quake had revealed. "The earth is not what It Is cracked up to be." New York World. The Ewing; Clothing Co. are showing the lfst values in 5S and $10 suits and overcoats in Llnooln. Teacher The Lord made the earth in six days. Tommy Smutliers What did he do night sV Teacher That U a funny question. Who can tell Tommy what God did at night? lloWiy IJlathers lean, teacher. He made Toledo. Ohio. Tim Only Market. Editor I um orrv 1 can not take those jukes. They are alias old as Methuselah. Inkleiirh Uut what am 1 to do with them'.' I must get rid of them some where. Editor--Snd them to Philadelphia as specimens of the eoiiiinj humor of our grcat-frraiidcliildren. And No Jro A.Ut'd. First Tramp Where'r yer goin Uill? Seeond Tramp oh. Tin off tor one of them summer resorts around here. First Tramp hat's the idea or doin' that.' Second Tramp Well, yor see, 1 jist called n the doctor that lives 'cross the street there and he ordered me a wax- No rium Lout He Urokor tbrUkly) Mr. Silvcrplate in? Clerk No, sir. De llroker Woll. vlien he comes, please tll hLn to .sand me another barrel oi things nuit:il)le for wedding presents. The last lot is about jjone. Ta, ta! Xew York Weekly. ITncomfortalile Comfort. Mrs. Wayiipp I sympathize with you deeply. It must be very painful to lose a fortune Mrs. Illuck It's terrible! When we were rich we used nothing but the most exquisite antique furniture, but it s all gone, every piece, "The new furniture which you hare hero looks very comfortable." "That's the trouble. It is so com fortable that 1 am continually re minded of the awful fact that it is not antique." Remember that Francis Bros, have re opened the Cajrttaa Cafe. 121 Xortn Elerertlh atreet. Short order meals arc their speotalty. WcaterflHd should bf y-ur barber. Have your tonaorial w.rk (Vine at Weeterflfld's. The very laXmt styles In hair cut n Westw-flHd'a. Don Cameron's lunch South Eleventh street. counter, 118 A full line of (typewriter supplies at the Smith Premier office, 186 South Eleventh strotrt. Tel. 148. C. W. Ecfeer- Only Anotlmr Maluprnjilisin. She was a very stout woman stoutw than stout women usually are. Bal lasted with a basket, two parcels and a balny. she buckod her way to tae only Beat in the car. Already in half tile seat was a. slip of a girl, fresh and Mayllke, as girls are apt to be nowadays. The young girl had a big bunch of lilacs in her lap. The stout woman, with the eight-o'cIoek-in-Uie-inorning perspiration, mopped some of It from her head and face. Then the lilacs caught her eye. These lilacs looked decliclouslr cool and fresh, and the stout woman felt uncommonly warm. The situation was a fatal one and Imperative. The stout woman felt Impelled to do Justice to it She did. She looked at the flowers again, then at tie young girl, than straight up Into space and came out with, "My, ain't them lilacs flagrant! Philadelphia Call. man, agent. Don Cameron's lunch South Eleventh street. counter, US Delti.YK Are Dangerous. Lorer And mo your mother does not believe in loiijf engtig'ementjs? 1 am delighted. Mlas le Uroker Ye, mamma says orerwo many girls' fathers have failed duiine loiijfeiifnMTM'ieut, and the poor tliiiifs never gut utarriad at all A Jut Ketiort, Little i5rl I've jfluod my doll's hair on tMiee, and it came oir both times. Mother Oh, well, try it again. Little (iirl I'm groin' to. This time I'm goin to mix tlie jrlue in a hair re storer bottle. Good News, Auburn, Falls City, Atchison, St. Joseph, and Kansas City. Oily Ticket Offlco, 1201 0 Street. K. C. TOVWSSND. Qoa'l 1'. t "2. A. r. D. CUKNCZiIi, C. 1. & T. A The Funke Opera House Block is Um place to get oiir Choice Amuri cn Ileiuity ami ll-ises if any shade. Carnations :nv,l till (! r.il work gaaran tci'il. Dccora'Moiis specialty. FIJKY o: KUEY. Fiorists. Tlio Kwing Clothing company are the popular priced clothiers of Lincoln. A call will convince you. Il'i5 and 1117 O. THE... NEBRASKAN FOR THE SI'XOND SEMESTER ...40 cents Burlington's personally conducted excursions to Utah and California. A Pullman tourist sleeping car will leave Lincoln every Thursday at 12:15 .p. m. for Denver, Salt Lake, Ogden, San Francisco and Los Angeles. Only J5 for a double berth Lincoln to Los An geles in one of these cars. Remember there is no change of cars. For full In formation and tickets apply at Bur lington & Missouri depot or city ticket ollleo, oornor Tenth and O streets. G. V. Bonnell, a P. & T. A- Oucbt to 1'iel CJiruji. llrst IJoy I bet Mr. De llroker feels cheap. Second Hoy Why? First IJoy Last week lie paid two hundred dollars for a dojf, and to-day a two dollar dog- licked him Good News. Old, but in m ir Dn-ku. A country newspaper reports a brief colloquy between a woman and her lazy husband. She was busy, and the baby -waa crying, and the man, so far as appears, was saying nothing. "John." she said, "1 wish you would roek the baby," "Oh, bother," was the answer, "why should I rock the baby?" "Why. bscause he Isn't very well and I hare this mending to do. Besides half of him belongs to you, anyhow, and you ought to be willing to help take care of him." "Well, half of him belongs to you, too, and you can roek your half and let my half holler." Philadelphia Inquirer. aillj fl s it B mm V llui COPYRIGHTS. CA I OIITI IN A PATENT? For Srcmut amwer utid hti limitt opinion, write to 11 NN A: CO.. wtin have lind cearlr Btt r yer' criKwnoelntlie iiati-ut tinunns. Communlca tl'nuHrlrtly t'Mi.Hrlcnlial. A llundliouk of lortiiuuon ivnuvmine I'ntrnlM and bow to ob tain tuem ncrit tree. AIbo a catalogue of mecbaa Ical and huetititlc iKHikt ent Jrfe. l'atints taken iliroHeu Wunn & Ca recetre Fiuolal notloein ttic frli-nillic AtiHTlrnn, and tljug are broucbt widely bemretbe public wlUf out ctirt to tbe inventor. Tlila mleudld paier. JBhuod weekly, i-lepant ly lllnn rated, bju by far tbe larcurt oirculatioi. of any bcientitlc work In tbe world, s J a year. Sinniiie ooriliii eent tree. ilulldlnc KdiUoo, moiittily, rlUlayear. glngle cqjiles, "J. contd. Hvery tmnjbtr cwutalns beau tiful plutcR. m oolora. and ibotn.-raiibi of sew bounesu wltb plana, cnabllnc bullden to vbow tbe latent dPBlcnn and ix-ure contract a. Address MU'N ii CO, Krw yoiut, al BuoAnwAT. This space Is reserved for II. 11. l'lenso, biu'ulus iinii bl.volo nip'i'3i I" No lHtli street. Htiltor Illoolt. 1 11J A HAS BEEN RE-OPENED EY jfl 1 1 AL 4 THE MOST CONVENIENT PLACE FOR STUDENTS I OPEN ALL NIGHT. Oysters and ame in Season. 121 North Eleventh Street. SHORT ORDERS OUR SPECIALTY. -:- GIVE US A TRIAL, CAFE The Lincoln Salt Baths. v,mfvzm sii iiviSMmm. J L.HI sim TJ-"al " 'sMSI wajtratjgpjig Cor. 14th & M Streets. LINCOLN, 3 NEBRASKA. OPEN AT ALL HOURS DAY OR NIGHT. SULPHO-SALINE BATH HOUSE AND SANITARIUM I AI.I. rOKMS OF 1IATI1S TurkUh. ltcn-Un, Iloinnn. i:'trlr. whi.r-ial att'rtlot, to tbn npnll. I rntlon of NATUHAI. SALT WATKlt IIATH-. wrTral tiin.11 lr.iriiw tlinii wa unler.tor llie tur .ji iiuruunniiii, .imoo.unaruiiim. ntm many oilier oih-. lltvllatli imium-I- tbe innitt ng. ji'et in tbe world SKA IIATIIIMi may b-nJo.ed at nil -eawiu In our lar.-. mairnlJlc nt Salt v ater SwlmmlDK l'ool, tDxlUHon.S to 10 It deep, beat ed to a nultorm Uiuperuture ol bB drgreea Jvwvnwvwnvrtyj .xy. W:iiSTTrj?'C w -W - ..4 Iv. INTERNA TIOXA T, r EntirtlyKrm. T" Tfm T'i T.- TT-i " "if itmet.-' ' - Uiiii x 0 AhrtautvfiktTxmii. r rf. uranm raurmt S 0 T- ffl'B -rrr 1 " tualrJilgvU." SturidHril of tbe V. B. Ci't rrlin inK)fli..tij-f a. i BujireiiM- uunuiHl oi mail, all ihc Sclioolbo t. t AturinJy ,iin. 2 nij W MX MJ IhV M- ,M ........... ..j ..,,, -. i,n.i,,..i. KtrlMlftlH. and otbei lJuc 7.: r 7 , "-"J num.- cuj-nijitij- i ueia 01 bi-lHiola. i- k i JtS!JS L" tors iliiit i. 5 1 v T.li I" r r . . ... ' 5 " uui uuinuvr. 4 , J A College Ir5iJent wrlU'fcS "For "ai.e Mllb MliUli the vyu mln ILo ? i "ivord M.uKlit, for twiurai-j- of deflni- $ I "Hon, for t-ffettiro ni-tiod in lndl- S J "(tatlni; jinuiuiitliitioii, for ttrtn jet J "I'onijtri'lieiiklre fctiiUuimty of futt, J "uii1 for iiriutical ute a vorkluc J i "dlillimary,"Vflfct?r' Inti-matloiul t " uxi4sU uny otlii-r inliielo loluuie," i The Ono Great Standard Authority, i Ko write lioti I.J llrewer, Jurtloe I'. B. S J tnnavum Court. 2 i O. & C. SmitttTAir CO., rabllsbera, I I Sjirlngfitild, Mass., V.8.A. Swr- Uk uu buy ebeuj- wriuU of anaum edltlont. w .vVvvwVWVt 226 So. 1 1th St. Ground Floor. Special Elates - to - Stubents. FUNZE OPERA. ECOXJSJE. rSAXTZ C. ZEESUSO Minmg-er.. Corner O and 12th Friday & Saturday and Sat, Maitnee, Feb. 28 and 29, BEACH & BOWERS MINSTRELS 30 Distinguished Artists, I'OI'ULAK PRICES. Seati on sale Wednesday morning Feb. 3d. 10, so, 30, cents. IF YOU KNOW. tli at I have the apparatus for half soling in the neatest stylo, the latest point phoes and up-to-date styles, it would pay you to bring all your shoe repair work to 100 South 18th fet. All work guaranteed. J, III rettIL TOlalter Tboe . . . PRINTER 1115 p Street, Lincoln Cards. Programs, in-vi-ations Good Work. JPrUei BeMonable. ' 1 ' r in 1 11