The daily Nebraskan. ([Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-current, September 09, 1999, Page 4, Image 4
EDITOR Josh Funk OPINION EDITOR Mark Baldridge EDITORIAL BOARD Lindsay Young Jessica Fargen Samuel McKewon Cliff Hicks Our VIEW Think for your drinks Skybox alcohol policy easily worked around What’s the big deal? So what if the university is telling you that you can’t bring alcohol into your high priced skyboxes? It’s not like Bill Byrne is going to burst into the U.S. Bank skybox and tell the bank’s president to put the beer down. Look at any red-faced, rowdy, stagger ing UNL student at the game Saturday. Do' you think he or she cares that alcohol is banned in Memorial Stadium? No. So we have a little secret for all those people who paid >>_ millions of dollars •• for a prime seat at Our dry Husker games. Don’t fuss and StCtdilUTl is jliSt fight because the , university decided uuuul uo not to let you drink laUghable as a Budweiser with ° your bratwurst or OUr dry have a rum and Coke with your CCllYipUS. pepperoni pizza. " Just get creative. UNL students have been doing it for years. Decades. Longer than that. Our dry stadium is just about as laugh able as our dry campus. So in the spirit of disregard for universi ty policy, we have a few tips to make the game a little more memorable (or not so memorable, as the case may be) for the new skybox holders. A flat bottle of rum fits nicely under your shirt or in your back pocket. Mix that with one of those pops served in a pricey souvenir cup, and you are home free. Once it gets cold, your coat can double as a small beer-cooler. The bulkier the better. Masking the can is the hard part. When taking a sip from the can just stick it inside the cuff of your coat and nonchalantly lift the can to your mouth. The skyboxes offer even more possibili ties, so go ahead and use that refrigerator for more than your hors d’oeuvres and Diet Coke. but it you insist on following university policy, maybe you should do your celebrat ing downtown before kick-off. Or you could just go to the game sober. A lot of people do. And we understand why the university wants it that way - rowdy fans, vomit, empty bottles. Would you want to clean that up? But there will always be some students who will never accept the policy, who will never understand. So landing an official policy allowing alcohol in the skyboxes is really not that big of deal. Just nod your head, smile and calm ly accept the rules. That’s what we do. Mitarial Policy Unsigned editorials are the opinions of the Fall 1999 Daily Nebraskan. They do not necessarily reflect the views of the University of Nebraska-Lincoln, its employees, its student body or the University of Nebraska Board of Regents. A column is solely the opinion of its author. The Board of Regents serves as publisher of the Daily Nebraskan; policy is set by toe Daily Nebraskan Editorial Board. The UNL Publications Board, established by the regents, supervises the production of the paper. According to policy set by theregents, responsibility for the editorial content of the newspaper lies solely in the hands of its student employees. lottor Policy The Daily Nebraskan welcomes brief letters to the editor and guest columns, but does not guarantee their publication. The Daily Nebraskan retains the right to edit or reject any material submitted. Submitted material becomes property of the Daily Nebraskan and cannot be returned. Anonymous submissions will not be published. Those who submit letters must identify themselves by name, year in school, major and/or group affiliation, if any. Submit material to: Daily Nebraskan, 20 Nebraska Union, 1400 R St. Lincoln, NE. 68588-0448. E-mail: letters@unlinfo.unl.edu. Obermeyer’s VIEW Er we m, the-Ninth pm of the |y|ont^ of Nineteen minet/ pjiNe, VkE isthF Horror M> catastrophe ms Supposed to shake- the Ve?y f PATIOMS OF OUR mERN CmuzMoN7 OH WB^y OcoKj 1H& MT\< ftlOSK VIP^0 AWARPS AR£ ON.' Where Would Jesus Park? Jesus wouldn’t worry about park ing. Jesus would ride a bike. Bicycles don’t produce poison gases, they don’t require expensive gasoline and maintenance and riding a bicycle is good exercise. Many campuses don’t even have parking, so you flabby car-driving sinner wimps should stop whining and start pedaling. Lane Phillips senior computer engineering R.E.S.P.E.C.T. Thanks, J.J. You spoke volumes in your column (Wednesday). I’m grateful to you for expressing what single moms have always want ed from absent fathers. ' Your mom has done a wonderful job. Zoe Olson senior advertising major Other Sports? I am a football fan, too, and I can understand Regent Miller’s feelings (Letters, Wednesday) that the football teafn should get more money than other teams. Football brings a lot of money into this university. Hbwever, he needs to understand the views of the other athletes, too. They should not be pushed aside’ just because they do not generate mil lions of dollars in revenue for the uni versity or because Mr. Miller does not enjoy watching them like he does football. Other sports are important, too. Molly Merrell freshman athletic training mi LETTERS Uberview I, like many others, look to the Daily Nebraskan for the latest in *reek affairs, witty editorialism, :redit-card tutorials and fast-food job Dpenings. “Obermeyer’s View” is an unfor tunate setback to the paper’s journal istic integrity. Without a united and clear focus, the DN will lose the respect of stu dents. How could we deal with such an atrocity? The DN is, and needs to be, a bea con of light in this sea of despair known as the “corn-belt capital.” Obermeyer is blocking that light with his big fat head. Justin Grotelueschen senior ag journalism 4% Survey Says... The Turing Test, proposed in 1950 by Alan M. Turing, is general ly understood as the following: An interrogator communicates with a person and a computer via a terminal. His or her task is to find out which is the machine and which is the human merely by ask ing them questions. If the machine can “fool” the interrogator, it is intelligent. When will a computer be able to fool you into thinking it’s human? We performed a less-than-sci entific survey of selected persons asking them this question. Here are the answers: Lew, a computer engineer, said, “I’ll build you one by 2005.” “The year 2010!” shouted Patrick, a New York conference organizer. Kat, a local bookstore manager, said only, “Soon.” Don, too busy bartending to be bothered, said “Thursday. “And I’m not telling you which Thursday.” And, finally, Mot-Lee, on his way out of town, guessed, “I sup pose it’s already happened, some where.” . Currently, there are few pro grams we know of that even come close. They spit out grammatical bits of nonsense like, “You do not turn into tacos, and you WERE NEVER THE SAME!” (from MegaHAL, an online conversa tional program), but this may result, in part, from the way these programs “learn” language and who they learn it from. “What is your sxual prefer ence?” a questioner asked MegaHAL on Wednesday. Correcting it to: “What is your sexaul prefer ence?” If you’d like to see for yourself how one of the better talkback pro grams work, try MegaHAL at http://cogsci.ucsd.edu/~asaygin/tt/ ttest.html, and let us know if you find out its sexule preference. PS Write Mack Send letters to: Daily Nebraskan, 34 Nebraska Union, 1400 "R" St., Lincoln, NE 68588, or fax to (402) 472-1761, or e-mail <letters@unlinfO.unI.edu. Letters must be signed and include a phone number for verification