Movie mayhem
ChickfUcks, love stories among those recommended for holiday viewing
I
1 J
TASHA KUXHAUSEN is a
sophomore news-editorial
major and a Daily Nebr
askan columnist
Christmas vacation is right
around the comer. Many students
will travel to the bowl game, and oth
ers will go skiing or visit relatives.
But if there are some of you out
there that don’t have much to do over
the holidays, Blockbuster will proba- *
bly become your second home.
So, to make the endless movie
choices somewhat easier for you, I
have chosen my top 10 movie picks
of all time. I have to admit, some of
my picks are chick flicks. But give
’em a chance anyway. You just might
like them.
10. “Major League”
I’m not even much of a baseball
fan, but this movie packs in the
laughter, which I love. Wesley Snipes
makes his debut into stardom in the
film, and Charlie Sheen, Tom
Berenger and Renee Russo round out
me lineup.
The sequels to the film don’t
compare to this one, probably
because the others lack one thing that
the original has plenty of - cussing.
Foul language isn’t usually attractive,
but in this flick, it’s hilarious.
For instance, it just wouldn’t
sound right if the third baseman had
said to Sheen, “Strike this ‘guy’ out.”
The point was made much clearer
when instead he said, “Strike this MF
out.” That line said it all.
9. “Grease”
There aren’t many musicals made
anymore. Most people my age proba
bly think musicals are cheesy. But
“Grease” is a must-see because it is a
timeless classic.
It’s the story of the good girl and
the bad boy who fall for each other.
There’s lots of singing and dancing
and great performances from John
Travolta and Olivia Newton-John.
“Grease” is one musical you can’t
pass up.
8. “Top Gun”
“Top Gun” displays the common
tale of a man who overcomes obsta
cles within himself to become a hero.
It’s not only an action movie but a
love story to a certain extent. The
film features a young Val Kilmer,
and who could forget Tom Cruise? I
know I can’t.
Cruise even sings “You’ve Lost
That Lovin’ Feeling,” but not well.
This is a movie both men and women
can enjoy.
7. “Dirty Dancing”
There’s lot of dancing (dirty) but
no singing. Jennifer Grey (known as
Baby in the movie) fills in for Patrick
Swayze’s dance partner and falls in
love with him.
The film takes place in die 1960s,
so the soundtrack is spectacular. It’s
one of those feel-good movies that
plays up to fantasy. Best of all,
Swayze didn’t need a double for his
dancing.
6. “Back to the Future”
Most everyone has had the desire
to travel through time. Michael J. Fox
does just that in this 1985 classic. He
travels back to 1955, and while he’s
there he dates his mom, befriends his
dad and changes his life for the bet
ter.
This film also leads to two
sequels, but the original is still the
one most worth seeing. This is one of
those movies you can see over and
over and still enjoy. I used to have all
the lines in the movie memorized.
5. “Good Will Hunting”
Written by Matt Damon and Ben
Affleck, this movie went on to win an
Oscar for Best Supporting Actor
(Robin Williams) and best original
screenplay (Damon and Affleck).
The movie has Damon playing a
genius who comes from the wrong
side of the tracks. His best friend is
played by Affleck, who’s also
Damon’s best friend in real life.
The heart of the story is revealed
with Damon’s realization of letting
go of his past and falling in love with
a Harvard girl (Minnie Driver).
Damon’s performance is amazingly
real, and his good looks are amazing
as well.
4. “Ghost”
True love, loss and deceit are the
themes of this tearjerker. Of course I
adore love stories, but I like humor
ous stories, too. Whoopi Goldberg
brings the humor into the film with
her Oscar award-winning perfor
mance as a psychic.
This movie also brings a good
feeling of faith in the afterlife. If
you’re looking for something spiritu
al, this is a great story.
3. “A Christmas Story”
This movie is fitting for the sea
son. Made in the ’80s but set in the
’40s, this is a tale of a little boy’s
Christmas wish for a Red Rider BB
gun. The boy, Ralphie, meets up with
a couple bullies and even talks with
Santa.
I like this movie more and more
every time I see it. Beginning on
Thanksgiving, “ A Christmas Story”
is shown almost daily on TBS or
TNT. If you haven’t seen this movie,
you’re missing out. It is a heart
warming story that reminds us of our
childhood Christmas wishes. Watch
it with your family.
2. “My Best Friend’s Wedding”
We all want what we can’t have.
Julia Roberts wants her best friend
(Dermot Mulroney), whom she pre
viously dated, back in this movie, but
Cameron Diaz won’t give him up
without a fight Roberts is sneaky,
conniving and ruthless. Diaz is
almost sickeningly sweet. But the
show is stolen by the humor of
Rupert Everett, who plays Roberts’
gay friend.
This is one of my favorite movies
because it doesn’t end perfectly and
happily, but instead more realistical
ly
1. “Pretty Woman”
OK, I guess a rich man Ming in
love with a hooker doesn’t happen
everyday, but the point of the movie
is that “white knight in shining
armor” fantasy could happen. All
women have it for awhile, until they
realize it’s just a fantasy. (Just kid
ding, guys.)
This is my favorite movie
because it is such a wonderful love
story. Love conquers all, even people
from such different worlds as por
trayed by Gere and Roberts.
Well, that does it. My top 10
picks for the best flicks of all time.
Well, since I’ve been alive anyway. I
love these movies, though I’ve
received much ridicule from men on
my selections. (I guess they don’t
think that it’s OK for guys to cry).
But hey, it’s my column. Na na na na
na na. Enjoy your break. Maybe I’ll
see you at Blockbuster.
Columnist for sale
'Campus celebrity' ready to stand in for big-timers on commercials
A.L. FORKNER is a junior
news-editorial major and a
Daily Nebraskan colum
nist
I’d like to make an announcement.
I, A.L. Forkner, being of sound
mind and body, hereby renounce any
and all morals, standards and sense of
self-worth.
In other words, I’m making
myself available for endorsement
deals.
Why shouldn’t I? You can’t turn
on a TV anymore without seeing a
couple of celebs playing basketball
and discussing long-distance.
Every five minutes I have to listen
to a comedian discussing viscosity
and thermal breakdown. Granted, I’ve
heard a comedian talk about it before,
but I’m sure he was talking about his
ex-wife.
Sure, I was a little saddened when
I first saw my boyhood idols shamed
into endorsements. The true Amer
ican heroes of AJL.’s world pitifully
hawking corporate wares.
We know the culprits. Denis
(Quaker State) Leary, George (10-10
220) Carlin and Dennis (pick a prod
uct) Miller.
(Yes, those were my childhood
heroes. Who’d you expect, Albert
Schweitzer?)
Either way, it’s gotten out of hand,
and I want my piece of the pie. •
After all, everyone else has bellied
up to the gravy trough. Why shouldn’t
I?
I’m willing to throw away years of
strict, firm journalistic ethics here.
(No, that’s not an oxymoron.) See, I
know it takes sacrifice to be a shame
less corporate shill.
That’s a sacrifice that I am willing
to make.
Come on, look around. Now is the
golden age of endorsements. With the
NBA lockout continuing, there’s a
shortage of celebrity spokespeople.
Or haven’t you noticed Samuel L.
Jackson, Jackie Chan and Spike Lee
doing the Nike commercials so covet
ed by NBA stars?
I’m telling you these deals are ripe
for the picking.
Don’t you think it’s about time a
journalist had a shoe named after
them? I’m envisioning a nice wingtip
called “The Fork.”
Would that make me a sellout?
You’re damn skippy it would.
But who cares? I’m for sale.
Throw me enough filthy lucre, and I’ll
pitch any product.
I’ll hawk Depends like June
Allyson. In fact, for the right amount,
I’ll piss myself right there on live TV
Need a spokesman for Rogaine,
but Karl Malone has regrown too
much hair? I’ll shave my head, face,
armpits or chest. I’ll even shave
my... Well, you get the idea.
Let’s leave it at that.
And I’ll do it with a
Gillette Mach 3 razor
and Edge Pro Gel.
Want to sell
long-distance?
Dude, I’ll play
nude shuffle
board with the
fat guy from
Urkel show
while tap danc
ing and singing
“10-10
.5769/.32+65% + area
code.”
I know, the big question
is why should y’all hire
me?
Why not? I’m a regular \
campus celebrity. I’d make a f
hell of a pitchman for any
interested companies.
(Psychiatrist’s note: Mr.
Forkner suffers from delusions
of grandeur and distortions of
reality. This explains his inflated
ego and his odd attraction to hair v
metal. He’s about as much of a 5 v
celebrity as Pete. Who’s Pete?
Exactly my point.)
Take, for example, my daily rou
tine. I get out of my Sealy
Posturepedic bed feeling refreshed
from a good night’s sleep.
Then, I hop into my shower where,
like NFL star Craig “Ironhead”
Heyward, I cleanse myself with Zest
Body Wash. (FYI: I don’t think the
tumor Heyward recently had removed
from the base of his skull is in any
way connected to his use of Zest.)
After driving my fuel-efficient yet
remarkably responsive Dodge to
school, I know exactly what they’re
talking about when they say the rules
have changed.
But it’s only after I get here that I
can enjoy a cool, refreshing Pepsi,
served up by the fast and friendly staff
at the various U-Express locations
Melanie Falk/DN
across campus. There’s always a U
Express nearby for your thirst.
Or, if hunger is your problem, try
a University Bakery muffin. A variety
of rich, moist muffins await your
hunger at all U-Express locations.
Low-fat varieties are available for the
health conscious.
See, I can do more than just hack
out a column a week. But the way I
figure it, while you’re reading my col
umn, why not read it to a child?
Like I always say, newspapers
help children to be better informed
and involved about society.
Hell, even my bad habits are ripe
for lucrative endorsement deals.
I mean, how many references have
I had to Old Chicago in my columns
this semester? I’ve actually lost count,
but I think I’m due a free drink or two. —
Besides, the beer tour is a great
way to expand your taste buds and
collect fabulous prizes.
Friendly staff like John, Keenan
and Ann Marie will make sure that
your visit is enjoyable.
Once again, that’s Old Chicago,
Home of the World Beer Tour. The
comer of 9th and P streets, downtown
Lincoln.
Tell ‘em The Folk sent ya.
A.L. Forkner is available for wed
dings, bar mitzvahs and personal
appearances. Yes, add life to any
social function with A.L. Forkner.
Offer void in Florida, Kansas and
New Mexico. (Sorry Tennessee!) See
participating stores for details.
Must be over 18 and under
35. Good for an unlimited
time only. So act NOW.