The daily Nebraskan. ([Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-current, June 25, 1998, Summer Edition, Page 4, Image 4

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Jim
; VANCE
Mall
marriage
Man seeks spouse
through interviews
VANCE is a senior physical and
health education major and a Daily
Nebraskan columnist.
At the Mall of America last week in
Minneapolis, a great problem of our society was
made into a mockery. It was a wedding. But it was
a wedding that showed the common feelings of
marriage. I wasn’t in attendance, although reports
say there was a packed mall to view it, but I imag
ine it went something like this:
Minister: “Do you, David Weinlick,
choose...uh. what is your name ma’am?”
David: “Yeah, what is your name?”
Elizabeth: “My name is Elizabeth Runze.”
Minister “Well then David, do you take this
woman, whose name you do not even know, to be
the woman you commit to for the rest of your life?”
David: “Sure! Why not?”
, Minister “Do you Elizabeth, choose David to
be your one true love?”
Elizabeth: “Well, sure. I mean the flyer said he
was a clean-cut guy with good credit, so I figure
he’s good enough.”
Since the debacle in Minneapolis, I have heard
everyone laud how romantic, interesting and
entertaining the event was. You see, David decided
a few years ago he would be married June 13,
1998. Well, that day came close, and Dave didn’t
even have a girlfriend. So his friends decided to
auction him off at die mall.
They put out flyers, which really did speak of
his good hygiene and credit, and what type of
woman he would like. His friends reviewed the
applications and then chose from six women who
were at the final event.
Romantic? Perhaps.
Big mistake? Definitely.
What he has done is take our consciousness
level of love and relationships, and dropped it
down a notch. This marriage will not last.
I have worked with many troubled young kids,
and it seems most all have one common trait—
they lack a strong family unit I just hope these two
don’t have any children before they get divorced.
Probably the best thing that could happen
would be for this marriage to fail, and for the
world to see it. People will then see it takes a lot to
get married and raise a family. If everyone took
this couple’s attitude, we would only have more
divorces. We will have more single-parent homes.
We will have more troubled youths.
Thanks, David and Elizabeth, for showing us it
doesn’t take much of anything to start a family.
Editorial Nkv
Unsigned editorials are the opinions of
, the Spring 1998 Daily Nebraskan. They
do not necessarily reflect the views of the
University of Nebraska-Lincotn, its
employees, its student body or the
Unweitty of Nebraska Board of Regents.
A column is solely Ihe opinion of its author.
The Board of Regents serves as pubfisher
of the Dafly Nebraskan; policy is set by
the Daily Nebraskan EdMorial Board. Tne
UNL Publications Board, estaMshed by
the regents, supervises the production
of the paper. According to poRcy set by
the regents, responsfclty for the edtorial
content of the newspaper Res solely in
the hands of its student employees.
--1-!..
Letter Policy
The Dafly Nebraskan welcomes brief
letters to the editor and guest columns,
but does not guarantee their pubication.
The Daly Nebraskan retains the right to
edit or reject any material submitted.
Submitted material becomes property of
the Daily Nebraskan and cannot be
returned. Anonymous submissions will
not be published. Those who submit
letters must identify toemseives by name,
year in school, major and/or group
affiliation if anv.
Submit material to: Daly Nebraskan, 34
Nebraska Union, 1400 R St Lincoln,
NE 685800448. E-mail:
letters@unlinfo.unl.edu.
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_Erin_
HANSBROUGH
Can I help you?
Servers not for customers to abuse
HANSBROUGH is a junior
news-editorial, women’s
studies and Spanish mqjor
and a Daily Nebraskan
columnist.
Like millions of other American
women, I live to serve. Hold your
horses, there, cowboy. I’m not about
to cook you breakfast I’m talking
about being part of the service indus
try, that bright bastion of employ
ment providing low pay and few ben
efits to a work force populated pre
dominantly by women. Of course
men exist in this industry, too, and
suffer some of the same problems
associated with it. But women still
fill the majority of the “sowing” /
positions, and face problems our
male counterparts don’t
Some fools think women gravi
tate to these positions because of our
natural desires to nurture all those
who step within our reaches. For
those who believe hat, we have on
special today a reality check. Please
ask your server for details about he
inaccessibility of high-paying jobs
with good benefits, especially for
those of us with vaginas and/or non
white skin. In the meantime, I’ve got
a plate full of myths and misconcep
tions to address regarding he treat
ment of hose waitresses, reception
ists, cashiers and sales clerks who
keep businesses running writh a
friendly smile.
■ Consumer misconception
one: The server is both inhuman and
superhuman, able to perform at max
imum capacity with little personal
discomfort Nothing you do or say
realty bothers die server, who is des
perately hippy to be where she is -1
mean, she’s still smiling, isn’t she?
■ The reality: A server is not a
whipping girl. Her job description
does not entail suffering on behalf of
the cruel, cruel world outside her
workplace. Many consumers have the
idea that beyond help and accommo
dation, a server also provides a recep
tacle for frustration, grief and impa
tience. Besides criticizing a server’s
performance, many consumers go on
to gripe about any number of things.
It is amazing to me how many people
are eager to make racist sexist and
homophobic comments to me, sim
ply because I’m in a position to listen
to diem, and I’m not supposed to talk
back. I’m serious when I say this
ruins my entire day at work.
■ Consumer misconception
two: Your presence in a place of busi
ness automatically entitles you to
personal information about the
servers. Ask them about their lives,
ask them about their families, ask
them about their grooming habits. Go
on, this is your talk show! Your server
is so glad you asked!
■ The reality: Don’t misunder
stand. I realty like making personal
contact with customers, and have
made a lot of friends from these types
of situations. Friendly people really
do make my jobs worthwhile. But
there is a line to be observed.
Sometimes asking a server about her
personal life will add stress to her
job. A good guideline to follow is this
- don’t ask a server anything you
wouldn’t feel right asking a stranger .
on the street
■ Consumer misconception
three: All female servos are hetero
sexual and are waiting to be rescued
from their mundane reality by a kind,
male consumer.
■ Hie reality: Obviously this
doesn’t apply to all consumers. Not
everyone mistakes their server for a
mail-order bride. But there is a con
tingency of men out there who need
to be made aware of this fact Again,
when in the workplace, servers don’t
usually have the freedom to respond
to a customer’s advances as they
might in a “civilian” situation. Even
if a worker is interested, she might be
put in an uncomfortable position
while working. And if she is not
interested, she Is going to be upset
Don't put yourself on the receiving
end of the server’s wrath!
If we all play nice and don’t taunt,
torture or harass the help, we will all
have a much nicer service-industry
experience. Being a cashier and a
waitress has, if nothing else, made
me a nicer consumer and restored my
faith in karma. Rude customers
receive the worst service, no doubt
about it And above all, at the end of
the day, I can laugh and remember
that, in reality, I only save to live.