Loud and ••• cIbri1? Fist fights are no replacement for the art of arguing KLAUS MARRE is a senior broadcasting major and a Daily Nebraskan colum nist. In Monday’s Daily Nebraskan I read a very disturbing letter by Thomas Hill from the University of Michigan. This man was given die chance to share his views on the national championship debate with everybody here at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. I think this was a wonderful and unique opportunity, and by seizing it, Mr. Hill did not just express his own views, but he also represented his university. He totally blew it To all of you who think I will now give you hundreds of reasons, num bers and stats why we deserve the national championship... sorry, this column isn’t about football. Mr. Hill’s letter stood out because it was so very rude, and it had nothing to do with the issue at hand. This man had the chance to explain his point of view to all of us and show us what the University of Michigan, which he graduated from, is all about The best he could do was insult our athletic program and a man whom many Nebraskans love. His comments were filled with hatred; I can just imagine him ham mer away at his computer while veins were popping out of his forehead. His letter was not just an example of poor sportsmanship, but it was also simply uncivilized. If Mr. Hill meant to offend any body here by calling us “corn-hoax ers” (whatever that might be; it is not in my English-German dictionary) or “idiots,” then I’m sure he failed. At least, I hope we are better than that and show more class when we are given the opportunity to express our views. I tried to contact the man last night to find out how much time he spent with Tom Osborne to call him a “pale, satanic freak.” I do understand pale - this is Nebraska, after all, and the sun just does not shine on us like it does on, let’s say, Michigan. I do not understand, however, how the skin pigment of a coach has anything to do with who is the best team in college football. What I’m getting at is that people simply have lost the art to argue. Instead of stunning all of us here with dazzling rhetoric, Mr. Hill just fell back on insults. I see this kind of behavior every day in die child care center in which I work. At the center, it goes somewhat like this: “You took my crayon! Give it back; it’s mine.” “No, you stupid-head.” I fail to see the logic in the latter argument I do realize why children are calling each other names, though. They just have not developed die skill to argue yet. Kids are still lacking die words to express clearly what it is they are feeling, and therefore they simply release their emotions with crying, whining or name-calling. Mr. Hill, on the other hand, is an alumnus of the University of Michigan, a very good school according to my information, and I’m quite sure he is not four years old. Personally, I think he made a bad name for himself and his alma mater by writing his letter, but enough about him. I wonder what it was like back in the day when Socrates was teaching his pupil Plato about life and philoso phy — you know, when Plato was just beginning to learn. I wonder if Plato ever called Socrates a “pale, satanic freak” if he ran out of smart things to say. To me, people who raise their voices, call names or start fights are the loser in any kind of conflict. If you can’t sit down, face another per son, and make him or her see your point, then you probably didn’t have a point to begin with, kind of like this playground conversation: “Give me your lunch money.” “Why?” “Hmmmm... if not, I’ll beat you.” I’m a person who loves to argue, and I hate to be proven wrong or “lose” an argument, but that is never a reason for me to want to knock somebody’s teeth out. I feel if I’d yell at people or threaten them just because they had a better point or made more sense than I did, then I’d lose much more than an argument — I’d lose my dignity, too. Many people seem to believe that the point at which their wit ends is also die point at which they have to rely on other methods, such as rude ness or even violence. It is impossible to resolve a conflict with these tools. Whenever I witness any kind of fight or people yelling at each other, I only see losers. In my entire life I have only expe rienced one person “winning” a fight. This person was my younger brother (whom I used to fight with like cats and dogs), and he got his butt kicked. A bunch of punks, at least 10 of them, were chasing some kid at a party and wanted to beat him up. My brother didn’t know any of these peo ple, but he stood up for the guy and told the oftiers that 10 against one just wasn’t fair. One of the punks said, “We’re gonna lack your butt, too.” My brother just stood there and said, “I know.” I admire him for what he did that night. All around me I see the art of arguing is getting lost, and the skill to convince and battle with words is being replaced with fist fights. Some people seem to believe you are right when you can shout the loudest. I hope this is not a sign of where our society is going. “Bully rule” is a threat to all of us because a pair of fists should never be able to defeat common sense or p well-constructed argument K - : I (.. ■- -v y ; y ; • yy.y MALCOLM KASS is a senior chemical engi neering major and a Daily Nebraskan columnists ^ Well, kids, what you have in front of you is an engineer who just wrote a column. I can’t even remember the last time I wrote a complete sentence, much less express my opinion in printed form, but I assure you that this column is much bigger than Fiona Apple’s breasts, better than Hideki Irabu, but not quite as great as the two minute bath scene in “Barb Wire.” Naked chicks with guns - how AMERICAN! Phew; now on with the show. Earlier this month I watched the National Football League AFC divisional playoff game between Kansas City and Denver. Since this is the Martin Luther King Jr. season, I deliberated about the Kansas City team name, the Chiefs. I wondered what it must be like, being an American Indian and having this savage-me crap shown each day. Then I realized I’m Portuguese, and when nobody gives a damn about your nationality, you start feeling real ly lousy. To ease the tension in my mind, I decided to brainstorm some new killer stereotypical collegiate mascots that would be super for a professional fran chise, but that the NCAA would have a stroke over. Enjoy. ■ University of Michigan People Who Can’t Face the Fact that the Big Ten isn’t the Second Coming of Christ. ■ University of Tennessee Slurring Jack Daniels. ■ Kent State Expired 69ers. ■ University of Miami Fighting Dead Gay Versaces. ■ University of Mississippi Torched Crosses. ■ University of Texas Mighty Pickup Truck Gun Racks. ■ Louisiana State University Charging Bo, Luke and David Dukes. . , ■ University of Alabama Trailer Trash. ■ UCLA f Breast Implants. " the installment of the designated hitter, interleague play and allow ing professional soccer to exist? These changes, though dumb (like the game of soccer), exist because they create excitements which equates to nior iffbriey! Since these owners are capitalis tic maniacs, why not add to the wealth by not pissing off the native inhabitants of this land and create a few fans? I point to Stanford University, which changed its name from Indians to Cardinals more than 20 you and/or Norway moans about it, the American public will never know. I am not one of those people who thinks the 1997 World Series brainwa£ft&