1&-- ...... ' •.
Happy Days
Materialism cannot fulfill our lives
GREGG MADSEN is a
senior news-editorial
major and a Daily
Nebraskan columnist
What makes you happy?
Is there something missing in
your life?
According to a commercial, you
can find the secrets to a fruitful life on
a show on MSNBC.
The show, as the commercial
claims, details what new items can
bring happiness to our lives.
If something is missing in your
life and you find it by watching this
show, I feel sorry for you.
The secret to finding happiness in
your life does not lay in a Microsoft
Corporation-sponsored network pro
gram telling you what possessions
will make you feel fulfilled.
It’s a sad commentary in our soci
ety that a television network uses
such an advertising campaign to
appeal to millions of Americans. It
implies that many Americans are
missing something in their lives, and
that the gigantic gap can be filled
with possessions.
An interesting thought, to say the
least. Wealth and possessions cannot
fill our fives.
But how many of us believe a new
car has the magical power to trans
form our lives? Let’s not forget our
career pursuits. Will we be truly satis
fied if our hard work in college does
n’t give us the six-figure salary?
Perhaps the more pertinent ques
tion to ask is this: Is it even possible
for someone to feel satisfied and ful
filled without things such as a new
car or without the things found on
MSNBC?
American culture would answer a
resounding “no” in response to that
question.
American culture would be
wrong.
But the materialist feelings in our
world are strong. The commercial for
MSNBC is just one example of how
mainstream voices in our culture
preach that possessions can make our
lives whole.
Everywhere we look, we are told
the qualifications for happiness, and
most of them begin and end with'
owning something newer, bigger and
better.
Is this truly what we believe?
Owning nice things on the cutting
edge of technology isn’t wrong. But
thinking that the ownership of these
things will bring our lives meaning
and fulfillment is wrong.
Yet materialism isn’t confined
simply to the pursuit of possessions.
At its core is a selfish thought pattern
that manifests itself in the lust for
objects.
As it influences our buying
habits, materialism can infect all
aspects of our lives.
Marriages, parent-child relation
ships and countless other meaningful
responsibilities have been neglected
because of our materialistic value
system. We want, so we pursue. And,
according to what we are being told
by society, there is nothing wrong
with that
There is a saying for those who
neglect their families, friends and,
ultimately, themselves while pursu
ing worldly gain throughout the dura
tion of their lives:
“You can’t take it with you.”
In other words, what good is it for
someone to gain all the possessions
of the world, if in reality their life is
empty?
We weren’t put on this earth to
gain status. We weren’t created with a
gigantic hole in our hearts that can
only be filled by a Pentium processor,
a new Lexus and a six-figure salary.
There isn’t anything wrong with these
things, but they can’t bring us the
happiness we seek.
While materialism isn’t a mind
set shared by all humanity, we all feel
the emptiness it creates sometimes.
Materialism tries to fill that void,
claiming that our possessions will be
around forever. Materialism pays no
attention to the fact that, in 80 years,
my car, my house and salary will each
be a memory. My tombstone will be
the only item left.
Therein lies the flaw. Adherents to
the materialistic viewpoint believe
manufactured goods and wealth can
fill our deepest needs. You might be
better off trying to cram the new
Lexus into a thimble.
Materialism cannot, despite the
claims of many, fill the emptiness we
all sometimes feel. The possessions
we gain through our life span won’t
last, either. Materialism is flawed
because it has a worldly focus that
fails in the end.
There is a gap in our lives. We try
to fill it with countless objects, but the
plain truth is that a spiritual void can
not be filled with anything of this
world.
You won’t find any Bibles or refer
ence to God on MSNBC or anywhere
within the materialistic world view.
Nor will you find what you are
truly looking for.
To have or have not
Technological upgrades add luxury to laziness
'§(* ' ''%k'
KAY PRAUNER is a senior
news-editorial major; copy
desk co-chief and a Daily
Nebraskan columnist.
A middie-aged woman complete
with pageboy, pert nose and Donna
Karan power suit peers disdainfully
into her livingroom.
Sally’s rugs were nearly as soiled
as her younger sister’s past. If only
Sally realized the wondrous powers of
Electrolux. Then Sally’s life would be
luxuriously complete.
Now we have it.
And Sally can have it too.
Once again, budding technology
is taking a stand so that we can feel
more comfortable taking a seat.
All for the low, low, low, introduc
tory price of $800 each.
On Monday, Gillian Stern, a
working mother in London, took a
load off and looked on as she wit
nessed the first robotic vacuum
cleaner in action.
Created by a Swedish vacuum
cleaner company, A. B. Electrolux,
the latest invention to break conven
tion will clean the carpets as you cart
in the groceries, care for the little ‘uns
or catnap on die couch.
Menial tasks no more. Now Sally
can spend her afternoons in unadul
terated bliss, nibbling at Mallomars
and cooing over Bo .Brady’s
Chewbaccan collection of chest hair.
No matter how much I would love
to use this space to sift through the
ways this contraption will concern
the women’s liberation movement, I
find dial I cannot.
Looking back on the drawing
board, I’m beyond positive that this
hootenanny of all Hoovers was creat
ed not for ladies’ lib but for the
legions of the lazy.
Yup. That’s Electrolux’s horse
power behind this thingamajig:
“Learn how and why you too can
overcome the drudgery and disap
pointment of using a common product
for a common chore."
Don’t we wish everything were
that way!
Sally s husband suggests that he
would like to have intercourse with
her this evening. Sally is highly non
plused. Thanks to Electrolux, one flip
of the switch and Sally can be free of
the more tedious tasks in her life - all
in time for back-to-back syndicated
episodes of The Mary Tyler Moore
(And we thought electric bread
slicers were all the rage - even
though, unfortunately, those are still
hands-on devices.)
In addition, this vacuum is more or
less one of those “Ricochet” remote
control vehicles for adults - but a lot
more juvenile and a tad more complex.
Apfpatbhtly it has ah aboustic
radar sy stem similar to that of a
bat and a highly sensitive
bumper to locate objects
and to prevent it from
“scarring the woodwork and
chipping the Chippendales”
(whatever that means).
Furthermore, the design ful
fills both the housewife hankering
for a small slice of Her Royal
Highness (“/r looks like one of
Queen Elizabeth’s hats”) and
the mores of those more mascu
line maids (“77?e design is based
on a small, prehistoric marine
creature known as the trilobite”)
It’s a sweeper for all seasons - and
gender nonspecific.
dui, wnua. wail, wnen you
thought you’d heard it all - even
though I’m sure many of you were
sold five paragraphs ago - for those
who’ve already exhausted the person
al ads scouring for a mail-order mate,
this little devil boasts qualities attrib
utable to the most perfect of all part
ners.
“So sensitive are the vacuum’s
sensors that it stops to avoid a glass
of juice in the middle ofthefloor, eas
ing delicately around it (and dig
this part) as if it were an invalid.”
This just oozes of forget-me
not: sensitive and inattentive.
Beautiful! Sign me up!
Wait. There’s gotta’ be a
glitch here somewhere.
Let’s see ... I’m already
lazy.
You’re already lazy.
We all scream for some machine
to serve us ice cream ... because
we’re all already lazy.
You don’t agree?
All right, already. /
Two words: Liz and Taylor. <
Two more words: remote and con
trol. ...
There’s the Electrolux’s
biggest glitch.
Where’s the gaddam
remote?
That’s wliy I’m waiting a
couple years until they upgrade
that sucker. fi
Because, unless we can fully if
entrench ourselves in our
throw pillows, why bother?
Until then, I think I’ll
invest my $800 in hiring a \
cabana boy instead.