Michael
DONLEY
Smoke and mirrors
Proposal from tobacco companies is ridiculous
How much is the Bill of Rights
worth? Would you sell your constitu
tional rights for $10? For $100?
Well, eight states are now having
a blue light special on rights of their
citizens. As if that weren't'bad
enough the U.S. government is
standing in line to sell some of their
regulatory power.
There have been tcms of articles
in the last week discussing the
negotiations between the attorneys
general of eight states and the two
tobacco giants — RJR Nabisco and
Philip Morris.
As reported in your favorite
college newspaper, the tobacco
companies are in these talks, “in
hopes of winning blanket protection
from lawsuits over smoking-related
health problems.”
How much is it actually worth
to them?
We all know that businesses
could care less about their custom
ers, as long as the issue in question
does not affect the bottom line. The
tobacco industry is right in saying
that $300 billion is not chicken feed,
but how much is universal protec
tion from lawsuits worth?
If I were an attorney general, I
would have an offer for the tobacco
companies — 100 percent of your
profits. Every dime. Considering the
number of lawsuits that will be filed
over the next 100 years or so —
until tobacco is finally banned — I
don’t think this is unreasonable.
I don’t think companies should
be protected from lawsuits at all, but
if they were going to be protected
they certainly should not be able to
use this protection to secure their
profits indefinitely.
Let me get this straight — the
tobacco industry wants people to be
free to smoke but not free to file
lawsuits? Makes sense to me!
Why would government do
this?
Doesn’t this strike anyone else as
strange? Eight states are selling the
rights of their citizens for a few
dollars apiece. If a deal is reached,
these states will pass laws preclud
ing the citizens of these states from
suing cigarette manufacturers.
What would be next? If General
Motors was to run into a large
number of lawsuits would it be
allowed to enter into talks with
public officials as well?
If these talks go through, we will
finally have the last piece of evi
dence we need to proclaim that
money can buy you anything in
America. Even the rights of its
citizens.
And what of the federal govern
ment? No one knows if they are
actually considering it, but the
tobacco industry wants the Food and
Drug Administration to back off
attempts to regulate nicotine as a
drug.
If I am not mistaken, the purpose
of the Food and Drug Administra
tion is to regulate those things that
«
If these talks go through, we will finally
have the last piece of evidence we need to
proclaim that money can buy you
anything in America. Even the rights of
citizens.”
may effect the human body in a
negative way.
I’m not a big fan of regulation,
but if we have a government agency
whose job it is to do just that, they
should at least take a long hard look
at the positives and negatives of all
drugs including nicotine.
The tobacco industry believes that
if the government were to regulate
nicotine they would ban it. If those
who know the most about the drug
(tobacco companies) think that the
government will probably ban it,
what does that say about the
product?
The fears of prohibition are very
realistic. Tobacco has many of the
same qualities that allowed the
government to ban alcohol and
drugs.
The tobacco companies have now
admitted that cigarettes are addic
tive. Medical studies have concluded
that smoking is detrimental to our
health.
It’s time for the FDA to step in,
not be bought off.
What needs to be done?
The very first thing that I am
suggesting is to close off talks with
any company that is attempting to
buy immunity from lawsuits. This is
supposed to be a free country, after
all.
I agree that there are too many
frivolous lawsuits in litigation now,
but we have to protect the rights of
citizens to file a lawsuit if they feel
they have been wronged in some
way.
Next, I would sleep better at
night if I knew that the Nebraska
Attorney General would in no way
consider even considering such a
thing. Maybe the attorneys general
of the other 49 states should come
out with their positions on the
matter.
Finally, the evidence should be
weighed carefully as to whether
nicotine should be regulated as a
drug, banned or just left alone.
I don’t trust our government 100
percent, but if I have to trust my
health to someone and my choice is
between RJR Nabisco, Philip Morris
and the FDA — I’ll go with the
FDA every time. The issue here is
legal rights — not just the right to
smoke!
Donley is a sophomore philoso
phy and sociology major and a
Daily Nebraskan columnist.
J.J.
HARDER
Soap opera suplex
Hit men, insidious cadres make up pro wrestling
If your weekday afternoons aren’t
filled with classes or work, chances
are you probably sit around flipping
through the channels on the tube.
The afternoon time on TV is
dreaded for the male TV watcher.
It is consumed by bad acting,
melodramatic scenes, cheesy theme
music and commercials advertising
seemingly nothing but feminine
products — it’s the reign of the soap
opera.
Every woman from the housewife
to the teenager to little old ladies
have at one time experienced the
power of these ongoing dramas
about lust, deception, power and
wealth, while every man from the
toddler to the boyfriend has had to
endure at least a short time of
exposure to this soap opera monster.
Well, for all the guys out there
who mock and ridicule these shows
for their pathetic story lines and
sagas, I know what you’re feeling.
But, I also know that, like the ladies,
inside you feel the need to fill the
void that these daytime dramas fill.
You have a hidden agenda to try to
compensate for the lack of soap
operas in your lives, and most of you
probably have not yet done it. Come,
lost souls, to the world of profes
sional wrestling.
There are good guys and bad
guys, brotherhoods and broken
bonds, lust and love affairs, crimi
nals and victims, all amounting into
a huge saga destined to be loved.
You may not presently view it as
anything special, but after you’re
lured in, you won’t be able to
escape, much like the soap opera.
Pro wrestling has all of the other
elements of the daytime drama as
well.
No 1. People To Hate And
People lb Love
The NWO, or National Wrestling
Organization, has overtaken the
league and is hated by all. They ar6
the equivalent of the dark side of the
force, dressed in black, suppressing
the inferior and cheating and
deceiving their counterparts every
chance they can get.
These hoodlums pull dirty tricks
and go against everything that is
good and moral. You can’t help but
cheer for the other guys, and hope
that good would prevail in the end.
2. Ongoing Sagas
The viewer has to tune in for the
next exciting episode, because of the
inevitable cliffhanger at the end of
the program. Some wrestlers ally
with others, but later id the month
they might be arch-nemeses. Plots
twist and turn like mountain roads
and never really conclude.
In addition, pay-per-view editions
involve the great matches, which
determine consequences for every
a
You have a hidden agenda to try to
compensate for the lack of soap operas in
your lives, and most of you probably
have not yet done it Come, lost souls, to,
the world of professional wrestling”
one and give a climatic peak to the
story lines that lure even more
interest.
3. The Unthinkable and
Unexpected -
While the dead are brought back
to life in the soap operas, equally
astounding feats are accomplished
between the tumbuckles. Sting
scales down from the rafters, the
NWO gangs up and beats someone
with chairs and baseball bats, Roddy
Piper attacks Hulk Hogan after
humiliating him in front of his
child, a ref gets fired and has to
fight far his job or the announcers
get ousted from their courtside
booth. Who knows, Dennis Rodman
may even stop by to spice things up!
You never really know what could
happen in or out of the ring.
4. Enjoyable Acting
This is what gives the ‘sport’ its
true charisma. Whenever I see a
fight, I always look to see how fake
it is, but the former football players
and bodybuilders have somehow
learned enough skill to hide the
detractors from realism and give an
appearance of pain. Plus, outside of
the ring you have to laugh at the
cheesy dialogue and overly dramatic
sequences that occur.
This all may seem like a huge
cult that is composed of white trash
Southerners, truck drivers and dirty
junior high kids, which it may very
well be, but it also is something that
deserves appreciation.
It is fake and funny, but it keeps
the interest of many. Women have
their soap operas, so guys should
quit trying to resist and come home
to our own soap opera — only
without the advertising for feminine
hygiene items.
It’s not a sport and it’s not a
sitcom, nor a drama or a thriller, but
a perfect balance that provides an
exit from the world of real pain,
deceit and lost morals, and an
entrance into one that mocks those
phenomena, leaving the real hurt
behind.
Harder is a sophomore broad
casting major aad a Daily Nebras- _
kan columnist.