Michad DONLEY Buck stops here Students shouldn't complain about responsibility Those of us who took the time out of our midterm, research paper and study-laden schedules to thumb through the latest issue of U. Magazine probably saw the article from Old Dominion University. A bar-code scanner was installed out in front of one of its larger auditorium classes. Students now have to slide their student ID into the scanner when they enter and leave. This was implemented to decrease the absenteeism rate in the general introductory courses. We’ve all had those classes with so many students that it would take half of the lecture just to take roll. In this situation the professor usually doesn’t take roll at all. Roll is an incentive to come to class. Professors use it to give those of us who would rather be sleeping a reason to drag ourselves out of bed, brave the cold and make it to class. The reality is that when we miss class we also miss out on the opportunity to have a person with a far greater grasp of the subject matter explain it to us. No matter 66 The reality is that when we miss class we also miss out on the opportunity to have a person with a far greater grasp of the subject matter explain it to us.” what we think of our professor’s teaching ability, we learn more through lecture than we do trying to catch up reading a textbook. The whole issue here is responsi bility. It would be nice if we could get a quality education and do all the partying that our bodies can stand. But, much to the distress of the Coor’s Brewing Co., this just isn’t possible. If any of us decide to spend Thursday night — and possibly a portion of the following morning — at one of the many local beverage serving establishments and miss our Friday morning class, who is to blame if we lose some points for attendance? We shouldn’t blame the professor for taking roll. The problem, of course, is our priorities. We all need to grow up and realize that we — for the most part — shape our own futures. At the risk of sounding like Bob Dole — the largest problem with people our age is that we have no sense of responsibility. Our greatest contribution to society so far has been huge num bers of single mothers and neglected children. We run around hoping someone else will cure our prob lems. Our most noticeable quality is how self-centered we are. We assume nothing matters unless it affects us. In the article about the bar-code scanner they quoted a student saying how much of a “pain in the ass” it was to have to carry his ID to class. 1 agree that Old Dominion University should have a small amount of leeway for sheer forgetfulness, but be realistic. If we can’t be expected to go to class and (king of horrid tortures) actually bring our IDs, what do we expect to leam? Do we really expect to skate through life with no more responsibility than a bum on a boardwalk? Don’t think that I’m trying to say that I’m perfect. I have a few even more dangerous habits myself. Motorcycling, jumping off tall rocks and out of airplanes.. But these aren’t the kind of activities that will keep me from class. And last summer when I went sliding down Highway 34 just outside of Lincoln without the benefit of a vehicle under me I learned a valuable lesson. No, not “falling down hurts” or “hospital stays are expensive.” Rather, the same lesson that the average person might learn from a D in biochemistry. All of pur decisions have consequences — and we have to deal with them. Donley is a sophomore philoso phy major and a Daily Nebraskan columnist. Aaron 9reCKELBKRG/DN Kasey KERBER Buyer beware Airline catalog offers frivolous wares You might not know it, but along with the skyrocket price of any airline ticket comes a little bit of entertainment for no additional cost. Its name varies from airline to airline, but it*s always the same — a catalog with weird gifts at high prices for people even lazier than a unambitious three-toed sloth. For TWA, the name of this fine catalog was Sky Mall—Holiday 1996. What it should have been called was Should I Pay with My Visa Gold or a Roll of Bills with that Franklin Guy on Them? Nearly all products in the catalog are insanely priced. . - Take for example the $7,999 TYeviglio Cappuccino Manufactory. Yes, you heard me right — an $8,000 coffee maker. Now it does come with brass trimming, chrome-plated steel and copper well, but for 80 bills with “that Franklin guy on them,” it better do more than make some cappuccino. That thing better have four wheels, fuzzy dice and an engine powerful enough to scare neighbors. But then again, riding a chrome plated cappuccino machine to class would be a bit awkward* ^ v . So would driving to class with an inflatable stranger sitting next to me. Yet who would not want to call and order Safe-T-Man? After all, he does “give others the impression that you have the protection of a male guardian.” All you need is $99.95 and a lack of self-confidence: Then blow him up using the optional Easy-Dual Action Inflator Pump and as Sky Mall brilliantly suggests “dress him up according to your own personal style and prefer ence.” And to make sure you dress up Safe-T-Man in moth-free apparel, be sure to order a Clothes Modi Alert for $9.95. This box puts a 99-cent bag of mothballs to shame by actually catching the moth, and as SkyMall humanely puts it: “They get stuck on the sticky interior walls and die of starvation.” Yet what are moth-free clothes without the perfect smile? And what’s a perfect smile without a clean tongue and cheap face lift? And finally, what’s a cheap face lift without a $29 tongue scraper and $69 Facial Flex? Yes, for about 30 bucks you can get a stainless-steel tongue scraper that could freshen breath and will scare your friends. And for just 40 bucks more, you can invest in a tiny spring-like piece of plastic you put in your mouth and j do exercises with to achieve a tighter, smoother face, neck and chin. Remember—“press and release 40 to 60 times a minute, for two minutes, twice daily.” . And if your face-lift workout puts you in a bit of pain, nothing will put you back in a good mood like “the world’s only singing umbrella.” Yes, your $39.95 will sing “Singing in the Rain” to you over and over again until someone with taste knocks your ass out and smashes the umbrella on the sidewalk. But don’t cry about your shat tered loss—get revenge with your $19.95 Ball-Shooting “Burp” Gun. It’ll fire 15 pingpong balls at your attacker, each time making a perfect belch sound. Every frat boy should own (me. But you could also get back the destroyer of your beloved singing umbrella with (