Bungeeee
Terrifying experience is a lesson learned
There are very few experiences in
this world that produce both terror
and excitement at the same moment.
Personally, 1 can only think of
two: 1) Having Herbie Husker tell
you that he is going to spank you
with a roll of Gouda cheese, and 2)
Bungee jumping.
Sadly, I can’t speak from experi
ence about the first part, but I
happen to be somewhat of an expert
on the latter. That’s right, I have
bungee jumped.
With the support of my “friends”,
I boldly strapped a rubber band to
my ankles and was ruthlessly pushed
off a 300 foot suspended platform.
If you people get nothing else out
of this article, I implore you to
remember this: Bungee jumping is
an expensive, yet exTREMEly
effective method of curing constipa
tion. Depending on the person, it
also has the potential to be tremen
dously embarrassing as well. _
I bungee jumped in Florida, but
many Nebraskans got to experience
the same rush at the recent Nebraska
State Fair. Watching those people
jump brought back many painful
memories.
I probably wouldn’t have
jumped, if the bungee guide hadn’t
let me go for half-price. They were
slow with business, and the guide
said that he would reduce my cost if
I jumped.
Apparently, fat people splattering
draws business like you wouldn’t
believe; nonetheless, I accepted the
half-price offer. If I was going to
die, by God, it was going to be with
dignity, pride, and as little cost as
possible to myself.
And if there’s one thing my dad
always said, it was “never spend a
lot of money on death.”
(My dad loved to create his own
adages. His favorite being, “Never
pass up the opportunity to submerse
your nose in mustard.” For a
complete listing of his proverbs,
to we: to rcm of the DN.I
You won’t know how you survived
so long without them.)
Steve Willey
“When you eventually
stop bouncing, the guide
permits you to hang
upside down for what
seems like eternity, but
in actuality, is really
only three days. ”
The worst part of bungee
jumping was signing all die forms.
Thousands of pages of disclaimers
were thrust in front of me, each
casually mentioning that “In the
event the jumper vomits up his
spleen” the company is not liable.
I was going to die, and the
bungee company knew it.
All I could think about was my
poor, old, gray-headed mother, and
how disappointed she’d be upon
hearing the news of her youngest
child.
“Mrs. Willey, I’m sorry, but your
son has been in an accident.”
“SO!”
When my time came to jump, I
was more nervous than the next
leader of Israel. The guide hooked
the cord to my feet, and seated me in
a tiny metal cage attached to a crane.
When the three hours it took to
get a stronger crane passed, I was
I lifted slowly into ^^#ttied to
hide my fear blit the guide saw right
through it.
Mayoe it was tne sngnt quiver in
my legs, or perhaps it was the
puddle of urine that gave me away;
nonetheless, he could sense I was
terrified.
As we approached 300 feet, the
guide quickly instructed me on how
to jump. “Bend those knees, extend
your arms, and for the love of God
quit peeing!” I couldn’t help it.
When I finally got the courage to
be pushed out, I experienced a
feeling unlike any I have previously
encountered. I could fly, no small
feat for a 300-pound man. But for
the life of me, I couldn’t understand
why the crowd was laughing.
I later learned that when a person
willingly jumps from a very high
platform, they tend to emit a very
unusual sound.
It’s not a scream. It’s more of a
muffled noise, not unlike the sound
your dog makes when you accuse it
of cheating on its taxes.
If a person could somehow learn
to recreate this sound on demand,
they would undoubtedly enjoy a
lucrative career performing at
weddings in the South.
When you eventually stop
bouncing, the guide permits you to
hang upside down for what seems
like eternity, but in actuality, is
really only three days.
This can be dangerous for the
novice jumper. The sudden rush of
blood to the head can cause the
inexperienced to become woozy and
likely to chant incoherent statements
such as, “I am the puddin’ girl.”
When your senses return
however, you are quickly
reminded of the euphoria you
have experienced.
I doubt I will ever bungee jump
again, but I highly recommend it to
anyone who is constipated and/or a
thrill-seeker.
One jump was plenty for me —
I’m moving on to Herbie and the
Gouda.
Willey is a junior ag-Journalism major
and a Daily Nebraskan columnist
Warm your heart
Passions ignite the spiritual fires within
rassions.
Do you have any?
Do you remember what they are?
All too frequently, people put
aside their passions. Living day to
day, working nine to five, bringing
home a paycheck, running errands
and studying don’t leave much time
for other pursuits.
Try as I do to not forget my
passions, they do slip away from me.
It’s so easy to tuck away passions
on a high shelf of our consciousness
while questing for professional and
personal success — or just caught
up in the business of life.
A passion is the fuel that feeds
the fire. It gives you the motivation,
the support or the escape to continue
on your path.
But there are little passions, as
well as the big ones. I am not only
talking about passions that consume
your life — like solving world peace
or finding a cure for cancer.
These little passions stir some
thing within you, too — desires,
wants, needs. They are merely small
fires that light the way.
A passion is something that
makes your eyes light up when you
see, touch, do it.
It warms the heart and makes you
feel good all the way to your toes.
A passion gives you goose bumps
when it’s “right”.
It can be magical.
It’s a thing that you love to do.
My passion is the theatre.
Everything about it intrigues me —
the sets, the acting, the staging, the
audience, the writing.
I am an avid consumer, but my
passion does not drive me to be a
participant.
But I also love music — classical
music. Sure, I like today’s music.
But I don’t connect as well with it,
not in the way I do with the music of
Jessica Kennedy
uStarting now, you and
1 will stop trying to put
out our small fires. We
shall promise ourselves
that we will act upon
our passions more
frequently. ”
Bach or Beethoven or Brahms or
Mozart.
The complexity of harjnony and
melody and everything else is so
stimulating. Classical music touches
my mind and my emotions.
Another little passion for me is
taking nature walks. Each on its own
(nature and walking) is nice* but there
is something very spiritual about
walking in ap environment without
cars cm* pavement or hustle and bustle.
You get the distinct feeling that
you’re a being “allowed” in on this
big secret that the trees, birds,
animals, grass and bushes all know.
I have a whole slew of passions
that I ignore, for a variety of
reasons. Like singing. I love to sing,
but I’m sooo bad at it that I refrain,
except un rare uccasioris.
And I love to write, but other
than papers for class or my weekly
column, I don’t write. I think I’ve
written three poems since junior
high school creative writing, four
journal entries and no short
anythings.
My excuse is not having enough
time.
How many passions do you
squelch because you “don’t have
time” or just keep putting them off?
Did you know that the original
definition of passion was “agony?”
Very interesting ... I suppose
there’s something to that.
If you were possessed with an all
consuming and burning passion that
you couldn’t escape from, I’m sure
life would be agony for you.
But with the little fires that bum
within, well, life would be agony
without them.
So how about making a resolu
tion? Starting now, you and I will
stop trying to put out our small fires.
We shall promise ourselves that we
will act upon our passions more
frequently.
We shouldn’t feel guilty about
occasionally indulging in things that
make us feel whole. When some
thing speaks to you, as a passion
frequently does, then do it.
It doesn’t have to require a major
restructuring of the way you think or
live. But a little behavior modifica
tion might be good. Allow time for
those fires that light up your eyes
and warms your toes.
So when it warms up today, I
think I’ll put my Meteorology aside
and head for the park.
For a little passion break.
Kennedy is a broadcasting, advertising,
integrated studies/public relations major
and a Daily Nebraskan columnist
Get in
pS&with
[[your future!
Choosing to become a
Doctor of Chiropractic
is more than choosing a
profession. It's choosing the
path to your successful future by
helping others maintain a
healthy, happier way of life —
naturally.
Cleveland College has been
training Doctors of Chiropractic
since 1922, and there has never
been a better time than now to j -
join this growing profession.
Take the first step toward your j
future as an independent health
care professional. Write for a free
admissions packet, or call toll-free.
Financial aid is available.
CLEVELAND
CHIROPRACTIC COLLEGE
Kansas City Campus
6401 Rockbill Road • Kansas City, MO 64131-1181
Cleveland Chiropractic College is accredited by the Council on Chiropractic
I Education and the North Central Association of Colleges and Schools.
Cruise to these hot spots
when you cruise to KU
Husker Fans! |
I Come visit us and look out for our weekend specials. ^
Sunday £
. Specials t
I $4.25 Pitcherof Beer Saturday 1
$1 well Drinks Specials f
Beef/Chicken/Shrimp Fajita 2 for ^ Wel| Drmks ^
2 for 1 Captain Morgan Drinks £
$2 Long-IsfandTea fi
Honey Brown Draft V
. f
815 New Hampshire A
Lawrence, Kansas k
j Phone:(913)8417286f
_^c2£s> ^SS, s^rr
Welcome
Huskers!
Lawrence's #1
Sports Bar
doinu&fbr a Good T'ime
and Great Food!
^ Burgers, Sandwiches, Dinners,
v* Homemade Soups, Salads, Desserts.
WO Brands of Cold Beer!
r* w TV's - Big Screen - Satellite
1 Mile West of Campus off HWY 59 (Iowa St.)
3300 W 15th St.
(Orchard Corners Shopping Center)
(913) 841-0033
