Grom
Wednesday, January 25,1995 Page 4
Daily
Nebraskan
Editorial Board
University of Nebraska-Lincoln
JeffZeleny.......Editor, 472-1766
Jeff Robb....Managing Editor
Matt Woody....Opinion Page Editor
DeDra Janssen. ....Associate News Editor
Rainbow Rowell.................Arts & Entertainment Editor'
James Mehsling...........Cartoonist
Chris Hain_......>.... .Senior Reporter
Talk is cheap
Clinton needs to cash in on his plans
A Republican Congress welcomed a Democratic president into its
den Tuesday for the first such State of the Union address in 40 years.
President Clinton proceeded to offer “a new covenant” for the next
two years and sounded a conciliatory tone to reach out to the
Republicans who could stand in the way of his progress.
Not only did the president addres: issues familiar to himself
smaller government, less bureaucracy, campaign and lobbying reform
_he hit on many issues that would endear him to Republicans, such
as the line-item veto, welfare reform and a middle-class tax cut. In
parts, Clinton appeared to make a pitch for the end of gridlock.
But Clinton has addressed these issues before in his drive to the
presidency and when he had a Democratic Congress.
It is time for Bill Clinton to stop re-addressing issues and take
action. However, after two years in the White House, Clinton appears
ready to tackle some of his major goals.
Clinton should push hard for the line-item veto, and if the Repub
licans hold up to their contract, he will see that legislation on his desk.
Sign that bill.
1 he president called for a lobbying reform bill and campaign reform
to bring government and candidates closer to the American public.
Stop the talk and push that bill. Make Congress drop that on your desk.
Not dll issues were rehashed, though.-The president was able to
further tout the paltry achievements of his first two years.
Clinton and Vice President A1 Gore earlier pledged to “reinvent”
government Tuesday, Clinton wanted to make government leaner, not
meaner. The president said his administration had cut 250,000 posi
tions from die federal government, trimming itto the smallestsize since
Kennedy was president. Keep going.
If the president follows his plan, the public may see immediate
. results with the “Middle Class Bill of Rights and Responsibilities,”
which Clinton said would be supported entirely by spending cuts.
Progress has also been seen in the president’s direct college-loan
program. This program needs to be extended to every college and
university, as Clinton proposed Tuesday.
One vital issue not aided by the loan program is the cost of higher
education. Direct loans make receiving financial aid easier, sure. How
about making a plan so that less students wouldn’t need loans? If
you’re streamlining the system, let’s really stmt shaving down and get
to the heart of the issue.
The president needs to stand hard on other issues, ones sure to be
challenged in the coming two years. Don’t let special interests shoot
down the ban on assault weapons. Expand AmeriCorps, don’t let a
good program fall by the wayside.
On deficit reduction, go further. Drop each person’s share of the
debt by $20,000, instead of the current $10,000.
Sign a decent welfare-reform bill. Clinton proposed to end welfare
in its current form within one year. An ambitious goal, yes, but one
with a wealth of support. Just don’t let the changes go too far. Don’t
put families on the street.
Last night, Clinton again showed his ambition, but he has had
ambition before (for example, health care reform) and failed. The
president has promised to end gridlock, yet it was not completely
broken in the first two years, when the Democrats controlled Congress
and the White House.
Clinton came to Washington with the idea of doing things differ
ently. His leadership still can take the Union in the right direction. But
perhaps now it’s time to take a step back and do things right, not just
differently.
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Staff editorials represent the official
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\ OXYooR ;
-roR\i SMiARTY
It’s all in the (phone) numbers
When Steve moved to the Near
North Side of Chicago a few
months ago, he got a new phone
number. He didn't know that it
would give him a fast education in
the world of TV show biz.
Almost immediately after it was
installed, the phone rang and the
voice said: “Oprah?”
“Who?”
“Is Oprah there?”
“You must have the wrong
number.”
Then it rang again, and someone
said: “I’m calling about the show.”
“What show?”
“Oprah’s. I got the exact same
kind of problem she’s talking
about.”
“Who??
“Oprah. Is she there? Can I talk
to her?”
“This is not Oprah’s show. You
have the wrong...”
“Tell her it’s real important.”
“You have the wrong number.”
“Huh?”
It rang again. And again and
again and again.
Steve discovered that his new
number was only a clumsy finger
away from the number people call
to volunteer for Oprah’s show.
So he joined a select group of
people whose phones attract
swarms of wrong numbers.
I’m one of them. If people call
AT&T’s problem number and dial
1-800 first, as instructed, they get
AT&T.
But for some reason, many
people skip the 1-800 prefix.
Maybe they mistakenly believe
they will save a long-distance
charge.
Then they get my phone. If they
are fortunate, my assistant answers
and politely explains their error.
I’m less forgiving of dumb dialing,
and I usually say that AT&T has
been bought by oil-rich Arab
sheiks, and only those who em
brace Islam will be given phone
service.
Steve, who runs a consulting
business from his home, is more
: Mike Royko
fortunate because he gets a more
interesting mix of phone bumblers.
“You would not believe the
calls,” he says. “People are so
naive and so needy. I’ll tell you, I
don’t know whether to laugh or
cry. Most of the time it is 50-50.
“Recently she must have had a
show about finding lost loves or
lost children or lost parents or dogs
or somebody that’s lost. I don’t
know for sure because I never
watch those shows.
“But when I got home from an
out-of-town trip my answering
machine was overflowing with
desperate people looking for
someone. The calls came from all
over — Chicago, Montreal,
Georgia, Florida, New Jersey.
Everyone looking for someone.
“It was miserable listening to it
all One woman was looking for a
son she placed in a foster home
mpre than 30 years ago; one
woman looked for a lost love she
met in Japan a long time ago. One
woman couldn’t speak English and
went on and on in a language I
couldn’t identify. Then this one
woman, I don’t know what she was
looking for because all she did was
sob for several minutes.”
Then why not put a message on
your machine telling callers that it
isn’t Oprah’s show and if they call
again, an electronic worm will
slither from the phone into their ear
and burrow into their head and eat
their brain? That’ll give them
something to think about.
“Of course I leave a message.
Nothing like that, but I say quite
clearly: ‘This is not Oprah. This a a
private residence. Do not leave a
message because Oprah won’t call
you back. If you think this is
Oprah, you have misdialed.’
“But it doesn’t matter. People
don’t listen. I communicate for a
living and speak clearly and
slowly; What more cart Lsay?'They
pay no attention to the message and
start talking anyway.
“What amazes me is how many
people feel that Oprah has super
powers and is able to do something
for them. Or that they actually
think she’s going to call them back.
“They all seem to think they
have this deep connection to a
woman who has no idea they even
exist.
As I said, sometimes it is
funny, and earlier this week the
calls were unbelievable.
“They must have been looking
for guests for a show about kids
who want to become singers,
because I had all these incredible
message form kids who couldn’t
have been more than 8 or 9 years
old.
“And they were all singing these
great old torch songs. There were
all these little kids’ voices on my
machine belting out these I’m
looking-for-my-man-who-got-away
type of songs.
“It was like an audition. I could
see all of those parents putting their
little kids on the line to sing, ‘Set
‘em up, Joe, it’s one for my baby,
and one more for the road.’
“The thing is, I never know what
kind of show she’ll be planning
next and the kind of weird calls I’ll
be getting.”
So I called Oprah’s correct
number and a cheerful recorded
voice said: ‘Turn in your debt
ridden relatives.”
When I passed that along, Steve
said: “I’ll probably hear form half
the country’s unhappy ex-wives.”
You can always get a new phone
number.
“What, and give up show biz?”
(C) 1995 Trlbaae Media Services, lac.
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