The daily Nebraskan. ([Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-current, October 11, 1994, Page 4, Image 4

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Tuesday, October 11,1994 Page 4
Nebraskan
Editorial Board
University of Nebraska-Lincoln
Jeff Zeleny.Editor, 472-1766
Kara Morrison.,.Opinion Page Editor
Angie Brunkow.Managing Editor
Jeffrey Robb.Associate News Editor
Rainbow Rowell.Columnist/Associate News Editor
Kiley Christian...Photography Director
Mike Lewis.Copy Desk Chief
James Mehsling...Cartoonist
-:-Amman
Intolerance hurts
“Land of the free, home of the brave ”
Today is National Coming Out Day.
Regular readers of the Daily Nebraskan opinion pages probably
know this already.
The issue of homosexuality fires people up like few issues can.
Lately, columnists and letter writers have been debating the issue
with emotional intensity.
The debate, of course, goes far beyond the pages of the news
paper.
In November, Oregonians will vote on an anti-gay initiative
called Measure 13. The measure would amend the Oregon Consti
tution to remove sexual orientation from a list of other traits —
race, gender, age. national origin — that arc protected by law
against discrimination.
The conservative Oregon Citizens Alliance placed Measure 13
on the ballot.
Indeed, some of the loudest voices in this debate belong to
those who oppose the gay lifestyle — those who believe homo
sexual behavior is abnormal, weird, dangerous and morally
wrong.
The initiative is a thinly veiled message of intolerance and an
attempt to crucify those with a different lifestyle.
Theoretically, a person can hold anti-gay beliefs and still be
tolerant of gays and lesbians.
But too often, anti-homosexual beliefs lead only to a climate of
intolerance, bigotry and hate.
For example, Eric Jolly, director of affirmative action and
diversity at the University of Ncbraska-Lincoln, said a few
problems arose during last year's Coming Out Day events.
‘in the past, there was at least pushing and shoving, and
sometimes more difficult things,'' Jolly said.
For many gays and lesbians, life is full of difficult things.
Friends and family members may reject them. People may call
them names, threaten them or beat them up. Employers may fire
them. Landlords may deny them access to housing
This discrimination is unfortunate and unfair.
Many gays and lesbians say their homosexuality is not a matter
of choice. They say that they arc “naturally” gay and that homo
sexuality is just part of who they arc.
People should not have to deal with prejudice because of
characteristics beyond their control.
But even if sexual orientation were a matter of choice, what
right docs anyone have to condemn homosexuals? Our sexual
behavior is private. It should not be a basis for discrimination
Discrimination in any form is unjustified.
Homosexuals often are labeled as promiscuous and unable to
establish strong monogamous emotional tics to their mates. The
same label could be given to many heterosexuals. For both groups,
sexual responsibility is important to stop the spread of AIDS and
other diseases. This responsibility includes such things as sexual
abstinence, condom use and avoiding multiple partners
Many homosexuals will take the opportunity today to reveal
their sexual orientation to the world. Tlic Daily Nebraskan salutes
their bravery.
StafTeditorials represent the ofTicia! policy of the Fall 1994 Daily Nebraskan. Policy is set by
the Daily Nebraskan Editorial Board. Editorials do not necessarily reflect the views of the
university, its employees, the students or the NU Board of Regents. Editorial columns represent
the opinion of the author The regents publish the Daily Nebraskan They establish the TINL
Publications Board to supervise the daily production of the paper According to policy set by
the regents, responsibility for the editorial content of the newspaper lies solely in the hands of
its students.
-- -
The Daily Nebraskan welcomes brief letters to the editor from all readers and interested others
Letters will be selected for publication on the basis of clarity, originality, timeliness and space
available. The Daily Nebraskan retains the right to edit or reject all material submitted. Readers
also are welcome to submit material as guest opinions. The editor decides whether material
should run as a guest opinion. Letters and guest opinions sent to the newspaper become the
property of the Daily Nebraskan and cannot be returned. Anonymous submissions will not be
published. Letters should included the author's name, year in school, major and group
affiliation, if any. Requests to withhold names will not be granted. Submit material to the Daily
Nebraskan, 34 Nebraska Union. 1400 R St., Lincoln. Neb. 68588-0448. I
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‘Coming out’ reflects healing
Jamie Karl’s recent warning
about multiculturalism (DN, Sept.
30, 1994) used gay rights, “long
haired sloths” and having to exit
class through a window as evidence
of declining social values. Karl,
from Dorchester, valued his Chris
tian heritage and the lessons of
home, church and school.
In his column last Friday, Karl
insulted the intelligence of Daily
Nebraskan readers by trying to
engender homophobia — relating
“coming out” to AIDS. He cited a
“DC family" group. Its leader was
ousted by the American Psychologi
cal Association for violation of
ethics.
Reading Karl’s multiculturalism
article, I half liked him. Although
I’m old enough to be his uncle, we
have much in common to agree
upon. My hair is also short, but
more conservative — shorter on top,
less shaven on the sides. Comfort
and convenience make short hair
natural to us. It is a choice; other
things are not.
Like Jamie, I’m also from a small
town nearby. We’re also a conserva
tive, German family belonging to a
small church of mainline denomina
tion. No one ever molested or
abused me. The only trauma was
one that happened to my mother
when that old. white church left its
chalking paint on my navy suit. It
was the idyllic life in a Norman
Rockwell print.
Adolescence, however, brings
surprises. Classmates taunted a
friend and me, calling us homosexu
als. 1 had to look the word up; that’s
how naive I was. (My friend’s not
gay; he's married and is a father.)
As I consulted the dictionary, my
heart fell. A depression haunted my
adolescence. As a Christian, would
Karl have had any empathy for a
skinny, teen-age boy who often
craved a “suicide button” to push
for an eternal, painless sleep?
Some kids, thanks to societal
attitudes like Jamie Karl's, find that
button and push it.
I was the editor of the yearbook
and class salutatorian. But in my
high school photos, sorrow lurks in
my eyes. Gay rights weren’t on the
Elmwood Public Schools’ agenda,
just like Dorchester.
The Bible told me to forgive my
classmates’ taunts, but it also told
me I’d go to Hell regardless. (Now.
Bible scholars say original texts
referenced male prostitution in
pagan temples, not homosexuality.
| We could all be winners if we
invested our human and physical
resources on mending the aging,
inefficient, physical infrastructures of
our society. Mutual support and
encouragement build stable,
productive citizens, gay and straight.
per sc.) I began living in denial,
thinking I’d outgrow it. Also, like
Jamie, I was homophobic.
As-a college undergrad, I still
hadn’t outgrown it. I was getting
good grades and was active in
student activities. Inside, however. I
felt isolated and alone. I also was
drinking too much. There were some
effeminate gays on campus whom I
mentioned to “friends,” only to learn
how cold some UNL students could
be.
Thus began my “coming out.”
Being gay belongs to neither pride
nor sname; it'sjust the way things
arc for many. It was a heavy burden,
being one person inside and another
on the outside — a dishonest
existence. Today, I’m happier for
my honesty; my appetite is better,
and I’ve added SO pounds to my
healthy frame.
Other friends of mine have
tougher histories. One gay friend
grew up as a Pentecostal. When his
mother found out, she tried to “cast
the demon out.” His father is a
business leader in their town, lives
with a woman of loose reputation,
has divorced his wife and tells my
friend being gay is immoral. He is a
big, good-looking, bright, creative
guy who dearly misses the affirma
tion of his family. So much for
family values.
Another friend is African
American and gay. Like Jamie, he
escaped through a classroom
window. Not from an alleged
gunman but from middle-school
classmates who were going to beat
him up His smart teacher told him
to stand up to them Today, he fights
for gay rights as an affable, well
adjusted person.
Many gay people missed such
emotional support, which builds a
long and healthy life. Some ac
cepted negative paradigms about
gay life, perpetuated by the many
‘Jamies’ of the world.'
‘Coming out” is about creating a
new paradigm and discarding self
destructive habits (like unsafe sex)
and negative self esteem. It’s
learning the process of creating
healthy relationships that gay
persons arc often deprived of
growing up. It’s a reflection of
healing and growth.
I'm much happier out of the
closet, but I still experience a lot of
sorrow — but not from being gay. It
comes from what society, directly
and indirectly, has done to friends,
loved ones and me. What is painful
is that, no matter what we may do.
there may always be people in
power, touting “traditional family
values.’’ who will make life a
frustrating experience for the rest of
us.
Ignorance is a “normal’’ and a
“traditional" part of human society.
The battle cries of the conservative
Jamies of the world are certainly a
normal continuance of tradition. The
uniform social code of Nazi
Germany is just a contemporary
example, being tragically repeated
in primitive nations today.
The question is, do we build
careers and waste the world's
resources in cultural battles, or do
we create a better world of mutual
understanding, communication and
trust? We could all be winners if we
invested our human and physical
resources on mending the aging,
inefficient, physical infrastructures
of our society. Mutual support and
encouragement build stable,
productive citizens, gay and straight.
Karl’s message, though he may
mean well, is merely one of hate.
Partial thanks are due him.
however, for including gay rights in
the multicultural agenda. But most
of all, thanks to Jamie Karl, I see the
importance of “coming out" and
raising my objections. Thanks to
him, smart, compassionate people
—straight and gay — are thinking
likewise.
Bruce Koehler b a graduate atudent
and a guest columnist to the Dally
Nebraskan.