Mlt I III I I P \ll M W
ASUN action is wake-un call
If I died today, I think my family
and friends would prefer to bury me
in my car—or at least make it into a
memorial shrine.
That would save them from
having to clean it out.
At last glance, my car contained a
ton of soda cans, a coal hanger, a
coat, five phone books from different
cities, seven maps from different
states, two dozen cassettes, two dozen
used AA batteries, half a quart of oil,
a gallon of antifreeze and several
garbage togs, which obviously were
not serving their purpose.
That’s just what’s visible.
Then there’s the empty refried
bcan can under my seat.
How a bean can got in my car is a
mystery to me. I opened the door one
day, and there it was. Its top was wide
open, as if to say “Hi, slob.”
There were no tortilla packages or
com chip togs, not even a spoon. I
don’t remember ever eating plain ol’
refried beans with my hands while on
the road. I could have put the whole
can on a stick, frozen it and eaten a
beanciclc — less messy and almost as
tasty.
Just having a empty bean can in
my car is one thing. Letting it stay
there for three weeks is a testament to
my sloppiness.
Maybe I’ll finally pitch the bean
can. Or maybe not. That can is more
familiar to me than things around
campus.
This place has just gone to heck in
a handbasket since I left.
• Those kooky university folks
have planted grass over a perfectly
good parking lot. Now, I love grass as
much as the next gal, but whoever
designed this green space must
believe the best way to get from
Bancroft Hall to the Nebraska Union
Student government on this campus
has become as ugly and rotten as a big
pile of beans under the front seat of a
small car on a hot summer day. Moan
all you like, but the problem will not go
away until you do something about it.
is by way of Bangladesh. If I wanted
to explore meandering paths. I’d go
to East Campus.
• With impersonal, computerized
enrollment, future generations will
miss out on the thrill of trying to
guess how the little old ladies will
mispronounce their names at drop/
add.
• Richards Hall still is standing,
but only because of Silly Putty.
• The Lied Center for Performing
Arts still is standing, but only because
paying the cost of destroying it would
require twice as many ticket sales as
it currently generates.
• Memorial Stadium still is
standing.
• DaVinci’s is not standing.
Perhaps if they had served refried
beans...
• Heiress to “The King,” Lisa
Marie Presley, has wed pop icon and
bean tycoon Andrew Loudon.
When it comes to beans, no one
knows less than the Association of
Students of the University of Nebras
ka.
In case you don’t recall, ASUN
pulled a hostile takeover of the
University Program Council last
spring. Even I heard about it, and I
was in Europe.
If you pay any attention to posters
in the union, the Daily Nebraskan
classified ads, residence hall bulletin
boards or anything beyond the end of
your nose, you know that UPC
provides this university with a diverse
mix of entertaining ami educational
programs. Sure, they may not appeal
to everyone, but neither do fraternity
keggers.
Loudon and ASUN say they want
to hold UPC accountable for the
funds it receives from students. This
would be a noble idea if ASUN truly
represented the students of this
campus. But ASUN is full of resume
stufTers who can—by any means
necessary—gamer enough votes to
win.
Student government on this
campus has become as ugly and
rotten as a big pile of beans under the
front scat of a small car on a hot
summer day. Moan all you like, but
the problem will not go away until
you do something about it. Maybe
this UPC quandary is the wake-up
call we need to change things around
here.
I, for one, am tired of being on the
outside of my university looking in,
but come election time this year, I
will be miles away from here, my
diploma flapping in the breeze.
That doesn’t mean there will still
be beans under my scat.
Paulmau is a senior newt-editorial and
history major and a Daily Nebraskan
columnist.
M \i I in w Woom
UNL changes—or maybe not
The more things change, the more
they stay the same.
Monday brought with it the first
day of classes at the University of
Nebraska-Lincoln. Campus was
abuzz. Bookstores were crowded,
classes were full, and freshmen were
lost.
Despite the many tell-tale signs of
the beginning of yet another school
year, those of us who’ve been here
awhile know much is different at
UNL this August.
For the first time ever, students
can ride Lincoln’s StarTran buses for
free — thanks to a $228,000 contract
with the university. According to
StarTran, more than 2,000 passen
gers rode the buses Monday with a
UNL pass. All a student has to do is
flash his ID card and bus pass and
BAM!! — have a seat. Not a bad
deal.
Except, of course, for the fact that
the university (translation: the
students) is paying for this service.
Mike Cacak, manager of traaspor
tation services at UNL, said the stash
of cash for busing came from last
year’s parking budget.
Hmmm. I can buy that. But, why
then were the substantial increases in
parking permit fees needed?
Perhaps to pay for the new parking
garage that won’t be built Last
spring, university officials hastily
came up with a plan to build a garage
smashed between the Nebraska Union
and Alpha Phi Sorority. Unfortunate
ly, it took whining from sorority
alumnae before they realized the
impracticality of that location.
Where should the university build
a parking garage? The best spot
would be just cast of tlie Temple
Building at 13th and R streets. But
that would interfere with the pro
posed “gateway to campus” park.
And campus beautification seems to
have priority over parking at UNL.
Which brings up the much-argued
and much-completed green space
Where should the university build a
parking garage? The best spot would
be just east of the Temple Building at
13th and R streets. But that would
interfere with the proposed “gateway
to campus'*park.
north of the Nebraska Union. During
the summer, construction crews
ripped up an asphalt parking lot and
left grass in its place. Environmental
ists cheered, and commuters groaned.
I’m all for green space on campus.
But I’m more for the idea of “If
you’re going to do something, do it
right.’’ No one seemed to notice that
another parking lot still is next to
“Spanier’s folly.”
Or, if Chancellor Spanicr was
serious about removing campus
eyesores, he would do something
about Richards Hall.
As of now, I don’t have a class in
that building thus semester. But with
the new NRoll system, I can drop and
add all this week until my fingers arc
calloused and numb. Or at least until
6:30 p.m. each day, when NRoll
closes. It must get tired or something.
But NRoll definitely is better than
the old method of drop/add, which
came with Disncyland-iength lines. I
can even change my schedule in the
privacy of my own home. That was
the location I chose when challenged
to “register for UNL classes from
anywhere in the world.” Yeah, as if it
isn’t hard enough to decide which
classes to take.
I’m thinking of changing my
major to university administration.
Obviously, a lot of math isn’t needed
for that one.
Remember the daVinci’s at 13lh
and 0 streets? It’s gone. The univer
sity, which has owned that plot of
land for the last few years, knocked it
down to build an Area 10 parking lot
that provides 17 — count 'em, 17 —
faculty parking spaces.
Now, I’m no parking crybaby. I do
just fine parking in a metered stall or
walking to campus. I don’t feel sony
for those who have to park in a
remote lot and walk a little bit, or for
those who can’t have a spot right next
to their residence hall or greek house.
That’s life.
But what’s worse is that common
sense doesn’t seem to be a job
requirement for university adminis
tration. It’s no wonder the university
is under the slate budget ax every two
years. I wonder which departments
will lose funding next year.
Definitely not the athletic depart
ment. It’s self-supporting and does a
fine job of putting out quality teams
in all sports. But not even the athletic
department is immune to goofy
management.
Athletic Director Bill Byrne has
“asked” for a mandatory donation
from football and basketball season
ticket holders. It’s what all the other
big schools do. Well, NU shouldn’t
jump o(T a cliff because other schools
arc.
But it’s not the end of the world.
The Nebraska athletic program will
be here long after Bill Byrne, and
parking problems will outlast
Graham Spanicr.
What can you do? "
Woody l» ■ senior news-editorial major.
He is the Daily Nebraskan arts and
entertainment editor and a guest columnist.
Page One
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