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About The daily Nebraskan. ([Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-current | View Entire Issue (Jan. 18, 1994)
Tuesday, January 18,1994
University of Nebraska-Lincoln
Adeana Left in
Opinion Page Editor
.Associate News Editor
Arts & Entertainment Editor
Keeping the dream
Community service part of holiday, dream
Monday was a special day.
Amid rushing to class, keeping up with earthquake
news and trying to stay warm, some of us may have
forgotten why it was special.
Monday was Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
Although this has been a national holiday for nine years, and
all 50 states officially observed the holiday this year, most
individuals do not observe the day. Most companies don’t give
workers the day off.
Perhaps this is because many Americans believe that King Day
is a black holiday.
King was more than just a great black man. He was a great
man. He never gave up his fight to make this country a better
place to live for all people.
When we observe this day, we keep King’s legendary dream
alive. We continue to give him the respect he so richly deserves,
and we show that 20 years after his death, we arc still committed
to his goals.
To encourage observance of King Day, U.S. Sen. Herns
Wofford, D-Pa., and U.S. Rep. John Lewis, D-Ga., introduced a
bill this fall that would make the day a time for community
Dedicating this holiday to helping others will protect it from
becoming a day to hit the malls or catch a big game on the tube.
King once said that at his funeral, he did not want to be re
membered for his Nobel Peace Prize or any awards.
“I’d like somebody to mention on that day that Martin Luther
King, Jr. tried to give his life serving others.”
By devoting King Day to community service, we could remem
ber this man as he wished to be remembered.
Victim hot line
Lack of calls won't help stop hate crimes
Hatc-crime victims in Lincoln no longer have to do nothing
if they arc afraid to publicly report what happened to
them. The Lincoln Police Department has implemented a
Hate Crimes Hot Line that will let victims of crimes such as gay
bashing, domestic violence or rape to report the incidents confi
Victims who call 441-7181 to report a crime are given an
identification number to protect their anonymity. They arc asked
to call the hotline again in 10 days, so the police department can
follow up if necessary.
Victims of hate crimes often are reluctant to come forward and
tell what happened to them because they arc afraid of what people
will think. If the crimes go unreported, the police can do nothing.
There can be no public outcry to problems people do not know
But in the first month of service, no calls have come in to the
That is a positive sign if it means no hate crimes arc taking
place. But if people are being subject to crimes and are not
reporting them, there cannot be a solution.
If people are being victimized, they need to have the courage to
come forward so what happened to them doesn’t happen to
The hotline offers victims an opportunity to help stop hate
crimes without any risk to themselves. Their part in the solution is
only a phone call away.
I.DI into \l 1*01 K \
Staff editorial!! represent the official policy of the Spring 1994 Daily Nebraskan Policy is set
by the Daily Nebraskan liditorial Board Editorials do not necessarily reflect the views of the
university, its employees, the students or the NU Board of Regents. Editorial columns represent
the opinion of the author The regents publish the Daily Nebraskan They establish the UNI.
Publications Board to supervise the daily production of the paper According to policy set by
the regents, responsibility for the editorial content of the newspaper lies solely in the hands of
I f I II K 1*01.10
The Daily Nebraskan welcomesbriefletterstotheeditorfrom all readers and interested others
Letters will be selected Tor publication on the basis of clarity, originality, timeliness and space
available The Daily Nebraskan retains the right to edit or reject all material submitted Readers
also are welcome to submit material as guest opinions The editor decides whether material
should run as a guest opinion l etters and guest opinions sent to the newspaper become the
property ofthe Daily Nebraskan and cannot be returned Anonymous submissions w ill not be
published Letters should included the author’s name, year in school, major and group
affiliation, ifany. Requests to withhold names will not be granted. Submit material tothe Daily
Nebraskan, 34 Nebraska Union, 1400 R St., Lincoln, Neb 68588-0448
C iikis B wks
Amazing psychic predicts fate
Laic at night when I’m trying to
fall asleep, I often see
infomercials for the Psychic
Apparently, they can give advice
on any subject from missing car keys
to love affairs to Eric Estrada’s film
career. Just call one of LaToya Jack
son’s phone gypsies to know the se
crets of the universe. However, why
pay them when most other psychics
make their predictions for free?
I’m referring to people like me,
who don’t expect S3.95 per minute to
talk about the future. The enjoyment
we get from hearing our own voices is
reward enough. That’s why I’ve de
cided to offer my predictions for the
new year, on topics ranging from heal th
fads to Big Eight basketball.
The year 1994 will be a hellish
year for the history books with major
events happening on a daily basis.
However, my psychic sight isn’t too
refined, and I’ve only discerned some
events. The first major news event I
foresee will come from Washington.
In January, the government will
announce that A1 Gore has been offi
cially lost for two months. He was
researching more reinvention of gov
ernment facts in the White House
basement when he disappeared. The
next week Vice President Gore will
show up and claim that he discovered
how to cut another $50 from the def
icit by taxing Barney videos.
The Fox Network, desperate to re
enter the late-night wars, will launch
a new cartoon about two teenage boys.
Wart, a psychotic masochist, and
Monkey, a catatonic sadist, will be
come instant cultural icons. They will
be most famous for their rout ine where
Wart begs Monkey to beat him and
In France, a group of physicists
will discover the secret to cold fusion.
Unfortunately, a Jerry Lewis movie
marathon will distract the scientists,
and the technique will be forgotten
The World Wrestling Federation,
under fire for steroid abuse, will reor
ganize as the WAWF — the World
Alligator Wrestling Federation. This
Michael Jordan will quit playing
minor league baseball in Wichita
to enter a career in bowling,
proving his mediocrity in every
sport except basketball.
new league will pit wrestlers like
Hulk Hogan and the Macho Man
against Florida’s finest alligators.
After its premiere in February, the
WAWF will enjoy brief success. Au
diences will lose interest in May after
Jim “Hacksaw” Dugan gets eaten on
The Nebraska men’s basketball
team will attract national attention
after surprisingly finishing in first
place in the Big Eight. They will goon
to win the Big Eight tournament over
Colorado when perimeter-shooting
ace Melvin Brooks hits a buzzer-beat
ing three-point shot.
April Fools’ Day pranks will rise to
new levels when a group of Iowa
computer hackers invades The Asso
ciated Press news-service network.
That day, front pages everywhere will
read “Sun to explode today” and USA
Today will be printed in Klingon.
Nerds everywhere will rejoice.
During the summer of 1994, the
new health craze will be onion eating.
After onions are discovered to reduce
the risk of cancer, restaurants will
begin offering new dishes like “On
ions AuGratin”, “Onions and Cheese”
and “Chicken-Fried Onion”. The
mania will end when it’s discovered
to have deleterious side effects to
one’s social life.
“Wart and Monkey’s Fourth of
July Special” will be the highest-rated
TV show ever, featuring Monkey
blowing up Wart over Niagara Falls.
Michael Jordan will quit playing
minor league baseball in Wichita to
enter a career in bowl ing, proving his
mediocrity in every sport except bas
Rush Limbaugh will have another
bake sale. After eating some bad fudge,
Limbaugh will be rushed to the hospi
tal. Believing to be on his death bed,
Limbaugh will admit to being a jerk
and apologize for all the mean things
he’s done. He will miraculously re
cover and then sue the guilty fudge
Alien explorers will land on Earth
in the fall. Unfortunately, they will go
to Lincoln, where a college student
will give them a copy of “Star Wars,"
claiming it’s a documentary and then
tell them dogs really rule the planet.
Frustrated, the aliens will abduct a
pair of political science majors and
conclude the Earth is not worth a
CBS, in a desperate attempt to
shore up losses to Sunday football,
will launch a soccer league. Misplac
ing faith in World Cup-inspired soc
cer fanaticism, they will then go bank
rupt, give up all sports and become
“The Letterman Channel.”
Finally, a blizzard will hit Florida,
leading to a winter migration to the
sunny Midwest. Nebraska will then
beat Florida State in the Orange Bowl
10-3 and complain they were slowed
by the bad weather.
Of course, there are no guarantees
that my predictions are correct. Either
way, 1994 should be a landmark year.
Just watch out for Wart and Monkey.
They could be coming to a home near
Banks is a Junior international affairs
major and a Daily Nebraskan columnist.
I n 11in 1111 Kmiok
The cost of parking has gone up
over the years, while the number of
meter lots has gone down. Where is
all the money going? Not to improve
Does parking exist at UNL for the
safety and convenience of students or
as a means of making more money for
Some students who can’t afford
parking or who refuse to deal with the
parking hassle ride their bikes in
Now ASUN has proposed to build
bike paths on the edges of campus and
make “no ride” /ones on campus. To
finance these paths, they want to
charge students $5 for riding their
bikes. It would seem simpler to make
bike lanes from existing sidewalks.
Whatever the solution, students do
not need to be charged $5.
“What can I do?” you may ask.
Nothing is going to change until stu
dents get involved. One student alone
cannot change the parking problem,
but together we can make a differ
ence. Simply complaining about park
ing is not going to resolve anything.
You must get involved. Watch the
Daily Nebraskan for meeting an
nouncements. Attend meetings that
concern parking, bicycling, etc. and
voice your opinion. Encourage your
friends to go.
If every student wrote just one
letter to the university, that would be
more than 24,000 letters and might be
enough to get something done. Five
minutes and 29 cents is all it would
take. If you don’t want to write a
letter, call and voice your opinion.
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