'Best Friend’ flick should be left for the dogs
“Man’s Best Friend”
Bad? Bad?? The word “bad” doesn’t even
BEGIN to describe “Man’s Best Friend,” the
lastcst “out-of-control-killer” flick to come to
Lincoln movie theaters.
This time, however, it isn’t a homicidal
maniac orjilted political candidate,but a seem
ingly harmless dog named Max.
Ally Shecdy — whose “Wargames” and
“Breakfast Club” residuals must have just run
out—plays Lori Tanner, a television journalist
that wants to break bigger stories than the latest
fashion statements.
She breaks into the local top-secret labora
tory — whose security system is about as
effective as adiet crouton—and findsjust what
she suspected: animals that are being cruelly
treated in the name of science.
Enter Max.
Of course. Max isn’t just your garden variety
guard dog — who’s big enough to apply for
statehood, but a genetically-enhanced pooch
that is the product of DNA-splicing of dog,
cheetah, chameleon and others, all courtesy ot
Dr. Jarrct (Lance Hendrikscn, “Aliens”).
Jarret doesn’t give a damn about cruelty to
animals, has all the sensitivity of a milk bucket
and has been performing these experiments in
an attempt to put a bite into urban crime. The
product is the hyper-intelligent, but mentally
unbalanced, Max.
Max latches onto Lori, who escapes with
him and thus unknowingly unleashes a terror
upon her neighbors unlike any they have ever
known.
Oh, can we stand the suspense?
It’s not a question of suspense, but of an
overdone grossfest. As the movie drudges along.
Max munches the mailman, a mugger and a
mechanic. He also sabotages the car of Lori’s
husband Perry (Fredric Lehne) and swallows
the neighborhood cat whole in a particularly
gruesome scene.
Max docs show a sense of good taste — no
pun intended — when he decides to run down
a couple of dog catchers that get their jollies by
torturing dogs with shock sticks.
Shcedy’s acting in “Man’s Best Friend” is a
grade below melodramatic, and Henriksen again
proves his best acting comes from the roles of
jerks. Lehne isn’t around long enough for us to
care about him.
Some good work also comes courtesy of
Frank Welker in the voice effects department.
He provided the vocal sounds of the monkey in
“Raiders ofthe Lost Ark” and Abu in “Aladdin.”
A word of warning to the weak-stomached:
there arc some very intense sequences in the
laboratories that show the results of animal
experimentation. Writcr/Dircctor John Laiia
(“Child’s Play 2") leaves nothing to the imag
ination.
Hopefully, it goes without saying that “Man’s
Best Friend” is one that the kiddies should
definitely miss.
An intensely gross film that could turn the
most hard-core carnivore into a vegetarian,
“Man’s Best Friend” should be skipped over in
a big way.
— Gerry Beltz
1—:---J Courtesy New Line Cinema
Lori Tanner (Ally Sheedy) and MAX, the DNA-enaineered, state-of-the
art guard dog in the science-fiction thriller “Man s Best Friend.’
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obvious.bul for F:ox fans, it’s prob
ably worth renting.
“Made in America” Another
television star hits the big screen,
but a splash it ain’t.
Ted Danson is Hal Jackson, a
car-dealing cowboy who’s always
looking for love in all the wrong
places. But one day a daughter he
didn’t know he had shows up. It
seemsoldHarsdonationtoasperm
bank some years back resulted in a
black female child (N 1a Long), now
all grown up and looking for an
swers.
Afterthe initial shock wearsoff,
Hal finds himselfl iking fatherhood
and falling in love with his daugh
ter’s mom (Whoopi Goldberg) the
owner of an African-American
bookstore.
The movie doesn’t sound all
that interesting, but the chemistry
onscreen must have been right on
target: During filming Danson and
Goldberg embarked on a romance
destined for National Enquirer
headlines.
“Match Factory Girl” Finnish
director Aki Kaurismaki brings to
life this tale of a lonely factory
worker’s bleak, bleak life.
Young Iris (Kati Outinen) lives
with her drunken mother and alco
holic stepfather. She lives a life of
desolate loneliness. The one man
who shows her any affection does
so momentarily— he gets her preg
nant and then treats her like trash.
Not a bright subject, but buzz has
been good.
“Rising Sun” Another Michael
Crichton novel hits the big screen,
but this adaptation isn’t nearly as
enthralling as the book.
Sean Connery stars as Detective
John Conner, a man with more than
a working knowledge of the Japa
nese. He’s called in to mediate
between L.A. police and a Japa
nese company when a woman is
found murdered in the company’s
board room.
Wesley Snipes costars as the
cop assigned to the case. Their
relationship is tense from the be
ginning as Conner's reputation on
the force is fuzzy at best.
Crichton’s novel is a terrific read,
but the film version is tedious and
takes a few liberties with the story.
Connery and Snipes are both terrif
ic. but the movie lacks the burning
pulse necessary to make a thriller
truly gripping.
“Splitting Heirs” Monty Py
thon alumnus Eric Idle stars in and
directs this silly tale of intrigue and
deception in Britain.
When Rick Moran is becomes
the 15th Duke of Bournemouth, his
employee (Idle) discovers that he,
not Morams, is the rightful heir and
sets about to correct matters. Bar
bara Hershey and John Cleese costar
as Idle’s lascivious mother and a
smarmy lawyer, respectively.
— Anne Steyer
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