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About The daily Nebraskan. ([Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-current | View Entire Issue (April 8, 1993)
When He Plays Piano in the Dark j I Ms is part two of a two-part Action story In my dream I didn’t hear the image yelling at me, but I did stare at it for a long time, somewhat in disbelief. Misha and Bobby had turned around and started to walk back into the darkness. My image seemed anxious for me to slop them. 1 wanted to get up and run after them, but I couldn’t slop play ing, it was like I was stuck there. My image finally gave up and joined Misha and Bobby in the darkness. I tried to get up from the piano but they had already gone. I played. I wanted the music to stop so I could go after them, but it wouldn’t. The music became painful as my tears watered the ivory keys, and I played on and on. . That's all I could remember. It gave me pain just thinking about it again. I sat up in my bed, shaking the remnants of the dream out of my head. I wanted to believe it didn’t mcatf Anything, but I knew it did. I got oul ol l>eu and took a shower. I decided to call Misha when I got out. “I need to talk to you, Mi," I said, as humbly as I could. “Go ahead," she said, waiting. “1 wani to talk to you in person. Can 1 come see you?" “Uhmm, I’ll come there. Give me a few minutes.” As 1 got dressed, I tried to think of what I was going to say to her. I still wasn’t sure what I was feeling, but I knew 1 had to do something When she got to my apartment, I was speechless for a while. I wasn’t sure of what 1 had to say and when I figured that oul, I knew I wouldn’t know how to say it. “ Derrick, a re y ou goi ng to la I k or did I come over here for nothing?" she asked impatiently. “Yeah, . . I just don’t know where to start," 1 said, pacinga hole in the floor. “Is something wrong . . . tfid something happen ...?’’ The soft ness rciurnca to her eyes as she looked at me anxiously, dropping her purse to the floor. “No, no, nothing like that,” I said shaking my hands. 1 finally decided the best way I could talk to her was to leu ner pari 01 my urcam. As I wcnl through the descrip tions and emotions of the dream, Misha seemed worried. She sal on the couch looking and listening to everything I said, but she didn't quite have the reaction I expected her to have. When I finished, I sal down next to her on the couch. She didn’t say anything fora while, but I saw tears well up in her eyes. She held my hand and rubbed it, not saying a word. Her reaction caught meoff guard. "I understand,” she said, getting up from the couch, “the way you must be feeling right now." She started walking toward my piano. “I don’t want lo sound like 1 don’t care about you, because I do, but I need to ask you this.” I sal on my couch, kind of fear ful, wailing lor her question. “If you wouldn’t have had that dream — if it didn’t scare you so much." she looked up into my eyes, hwould you hive called me lo try and work this out?" She sat there and waited for me to answer. Hurt filled my heart and my eyes, because 1 knew in my mind that I wou Idn’l have. I tried to think of words lo make everything belter but they seemed to fumble outof my mouth. I ler head dropped as she let go of my hand. She got up, reached for her purse, and walked toward the door. "It’s not that I want you lo give up your music, because I know you love it. Sometimes I wonder," she said asshcopcncdihc door, "which is more important lo you — your music or me.” We stared at each other for a long time before the door closed. 1 went to the club a couple of hou rs before l heshow. Some of the band was there, tuning their instru ments and rehearsing. I slopped and talked with them, pretending that everything was all right in my world. Bobby walked in a bit later, surprised to see me there so early. He came over and shook my hand as the band continued laugh ing. I laughed with them, for a second, he made me forget the pain I was feeling. The second ended loo soon. I pulled Bobby to the side. c,an i uik 10 you, man: He sensed something was wrong. “Yeah, man . . . uhh,” he said looking around. “Lei’s go into your dressing room." When we got to my dressing room, 1 went to the closet to hang up my suit. “What’s up, man?" he asked, walking to sit on my couch. I sat in the chair in front of my dressing table. I started by telling him my dream. “It scared me, B,” I said as I finished telling him about it. “Why?" He placed a hand on his chin and leaned forward staring at the front of my shoe. “‘Cause I was alone.” I said softly, feeling my chest tighten. “And the one thing that made me so happy, that made me feel so good inside . . . hurt me.” I stared blankly at the wall in ironi 01 me, wanting iw crawl inside of it and disappear. Bobby tried to help me under stand, but it started goring late and we had to gel ready for the show. Bobby told me that the producers would be sitting at the front table. I dressed, trying to put my mind on the performance. It was hard to focus, though — Mjsha came to mind. She had tried so hard to show me how detached I was from every thing and it finally came down to her leaving me for me to under stand. . Wailing behind the curtain, 1 listened lor the MC to announce me. “I lercheisonceagain.jazzin’up Jazzy’s Joint.. . Derrick Williams!" I walked out onto the stage. Al though the crowd was clapping and screaming, I was oblivious to their voices. I fell myself smile and wave as I walked slowly to the piano in the center of the stage. 1 closed my eves as the music in my head started to play. , My stomach twinged as I placed my fingers on the keys and once again, slipped into a world that I had created. The spotlight shone on me as my fingers orchestrated the melody in my heart. When the music stopped, my world faded to black. I^Uonya Rodgers is a senior math major and a Diversions contributor. IMPROVE \OUR LOOKS, HEALTH AND POPULARITY. V QUIT SMOKING. (fy American Heart Association _ <D 1992. American Heart Association Join us in the morning for muffins and coffee! Don't Forget... Gourmet Cookies 3 for $1 Tuesdays Noon-1 Thurs. Nights 8-1 Opm THE WHY HOME E&s * Posters, Prints and Jewelry * Hard-to-find Magazines * Music by Women Artists 3231 S. 13th In the Indian Village Shopping Center 421*1701 Hours M-F: 10*7 Sat: 10-6 Sun:12-5 SINCE 1986 YOUR FIRST CHOICE FOR INTERESTING MUSIC &BOOKS_ WOMEN'S CLINIC OF LINCOLN PC S.G. 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