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Men’s Fine Fashions for I,ess
Lincoln 48th & ‘O' Omaha 84th & Center
Despite the sayings, it is what’s inside that counts
Even hairy, weak arms, jellyfish make statements
You’ve all heard it before.
It goes something like, “It’s
what’s on the inside that
counts,” or “Clothes do not a man
make.” “Smoke 'em if you got 'em.”
Something like that.
The cliches that Ma and Pa es
pouse as divine truths carry a pinch of
common sense.
Cary Grant was not his suits.
Granted, they didn’t hurt any, but
they certainly weren’t his only essen
tials in fashion. He sparkled in paja
mas, too. Or muddy trousers. The
magic originated in his grasp on the
undefinable truth of beauty.
It’s how you wear it.
Wearing it is walking, pointing,
sitting. The movements are your own.
The suit is J.C. Penney.
Remember the distinction.
The walk can be a jauntor a sweep
ing gait. The look on your face is the
secret. It’s the look of, “I know where
I’m going.” The fact that there is a
seeping wet spot on the front of your
trousers while mumbling “Where is
it? Where is it?” is secondary.
It’s not where you’re going. It’s
how you make it there.
Someone brilliant once conjectured
that the shortest distance between two
points is a footstep. Each step is a
crucial one. Each determines the next
puddle you will step in. The next
poodle you step on.
It’s not the pedigree of the poodle
you step on. It’s how much you giggle
afterwards.
Pointing also is an effective com
municative stance of power and con
fidence. Pointing tends to be an accu
satory gesture. It carries both positive
and negative connotations.
“You are cool.”
“You are fuzzy.”
Most importantly, pointing calls
attention to the pointer. The pointer is
making the calls and exercising the
confidence to do so. Pointing is ego.
The fact that a person is wearing a T
shirt or a suit makes little difference
in pointing. Unless the suit is a bad
cut. Or the T-shirt’s short sleeves
expose too-hairy arms and weak, puny
flesh.
Still, it’s you. It’s your hair, not
wool. It’s muscles, not Stove Top
Stuffing or any other commercially
produced padding.
It’s not who you’re pointing at. It’s
the fact that you use real potatoes, not
instant.
Silting is one of the most impor
tant stances. Luckily you don’t have
to stand to do it. If I had to stand even
while I was sitting, I don’t know
when I would get any rest. I’m sure
that my posture would get progres
sively worse as well.
Posture is an integral part of sit
ting. A person without posture is spine
less, by definition. Furthermore, spine
less creatures are jellyfish. There
fore, if you don’t have posture, you
don’t have lungs. You have gills.
Can you imagine how bad a ciga
rette must taste smoked through a set
of gills? More importantly, can you
imagine throwing a dinner party for
all of your spineless friends? Luckily,
couch throws are relatively inexpen
sive, and, therefore, disposable.
Sitting, however, is not. Sitting
gives reason to the rhyme of the iron
ing board. Sitting gives a purpose to
butts. Sitting makes it clear what is
front and what is back. Sitting keeps
the Nebraska Furniture Mart in busi
ness.
It’s not where you’re sitting. It’s
how you’re sitting. And what you’re
sitting in. The crossed legs. The crossed
eyes. Every facial expression is am
filified because gestures are more
imited. Unless you have really long
arms. Or eight of them.
It’s not the fact that you have more
than the average number of arms. It’s
the fact that you use them to express
yourself.
It’s the fact that you do express
yourself.
Now that’s fashion!
Stock is a senior English major and a
Daily Nebraskan senior reporter and colum
nist —
On fhe C ovep
Double take
The two faces of Michele
Hudson: Hudson, a senior
advertising major, said she
doesnl need makeup to feel
good about herself but wears it
as a way to experiment with
PhotobyMichelle Paulman
I
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Lincoln 4Htn & u umana B4tn & uenter |
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101 South 48th St.
r=rz Lincoln
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..Sale Now Thru 9/29/91
Beauty
Continued from Page 1
beauty.
That religion can be sad.
The United States has a S33 bil
lion-a-year diet industry and a 150,000
anorexia death count each year to go
with it.
When women and men realize that
supermodel-esque bodies are proba
bly unattainable for them, not be
cause of their exercise stamina but
because of genetics, America will
have a healthier society.
But even fashion magazines play
with Americans’ minds.
In the September issue of “Allure”
magazine, Vogue’s “Madonna Ma
keover” is shown. By computer re
touching, Madonna loses a skunk
like stripe in her hair, has her legs and
breasts removed (she’s sitting in a
r ^
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Specializing in...
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pool) and has her bathing suit straps
thinned out — all to make the image
more aesthetically pleasing.
As long as people arc bombarded
with images of unreality in the media,
true reality will be harsh. People who
go overboard will go into debt buying
Soloflex machines, numerous cosmetic
miracle-products and diet pills.
Wolf says today’s heroine must
“keep on being beautiful.” But what
if a woman never feels beautiful?
Will she unhappily pursue beauty until
she’s broke and even more insecure?
At what point will women stop and
say, “I’ve had enough, I’ll never look
like Linda Evangelista or Naomi
Campbell — not even with plastic
surgery.”
' When a woman or man*can say
that and look into the mirror and
smile, zits and all with split ends
flying away — that’s inner beauty.
■■ ' "■
Campus Classics
Study the classic blend of
comfort and style in Birkenstock
footwear, and
learn how good
your feet can
feel! Suede,
leather, and
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autumn colors of -
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Birkenstock
Footloose & Fancy
1219,,PM Street 476-6119
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