Coors alters face of sports? Dream on!
Paul
Domeier
the money come from?), Colorado changes the
name of the CU Events Center to the Coors
Events Center. Honest.
September 26,1990, I’m lying in bed, think
ing about recent sports developments that have
nothing to do with sports:
“What exactly is a Coors event? Can frater
nities and sororities now rent the gym for
parties?
“1 know that college athletics is big busi
ness and all, but this direct marketing is a little
much. This is alcohol money, and about half of
us supposedly cannot have anything to do with
alcohol. Beer is something that generally hurts
athletes and is taboo for most competitors.
“I wonder what might happen if this trend
continues ... “
(dream sequence)
September 1991: Coors increases its fund
ing to Colorado and demands that the team
change its nickname from the Buffaloes to the
Bar-Hoppers. The school complies.
March 1992: Congress bans alcohol adver
tising from television, just like tobacco ads are
banned. More and more alcohol companies
buy into college sports, and universities across
the country undergo name changes demanded
by sponsors Attendance increases.
Duke changes its nickname from the Blue
Devils to the Pink Elephants. The Marshall
Thundering Herd becomes the Marshall Stum
bling Winos. Alabama remains the Crimson
Tide since no one knows what the heck that is
anyway.
May 1992: Nebraska, resisting the advertis
ing binge sweeping the nation, declines to
change the team’s name to the Hops-huskers.
Osborne says, “I can’t believe we even
considered it.”
June 1992: The University of North Caro
lina announces that each of the school’s cam
puses must adopt the name of a cigarette com
pany.
But a regent threatens, “If we catch any
athletes sucking gas because they’ve been
sucking cigarettes...”
June 1993: Drunken driving is made a 15
yard penalty.
July 1993: Two chiseled inscriptions on
Nebraska’s Memorial Stadium are changed.
The northeast comer now says “LESS HLL
ING ’ ’ and the south west corner says “ T A STES
GREAT.”
Osborne again is dismayed.
* ‘ Nobody ever asks me anything anymore, ’ ’
Osborne says.
October 1993: Two dru.iken drivers smash
into each other in Boulder, Colo. Both are let
off by Judge Multy “Head” Schotz, who cites
offsetting penalties.
February 1994: Jim Beam demands that
Julius Dannon Jackson, point guard for the Jim
Beam Indiana Hoochers, change his nickname.
“We’re not giving any money to any team
with a any player known as J.D.,” a spokesper
son says.
March 1994: Nebraska changes Herbie
Husker’s hair color from blonde to brown to
make him look like Norm from “Cheers.”
May 1996: Traditional Empire University
announces that 18 starters from the previous
year’s national-champion football team are
dependent on drugs, alcohol, steroids, Twink
ies and MTV.
‘ ‘We don’t know how this happened, but we
know we expressly forbid such action,’ ’ Souses
coach Hedin DeSand said from the Everything
That is Bad For You Press Lounge and Restau
rant. “I don’t know how they could have been
influenced to try that stuff.”
December 1996: Noted columnist Paul
Domeier reports that AA teams are now Alco
holics Anonymous instead of All-American.
Thousands of readers write in their apprecia
tion. (I said this was a dream sequence.)
October 1997: Nebraska’s athletic depart
ment, though warning athletes that excessive
sexual activity will fatigue them, sells Home
coming to the Trojan condom company.
The traditional red balloons at games are
replaced by helium-filled ... well, you get the
picture. Environmentalists report that birds not
only survive the new “balloons,” but seem to
be a lot happier.
Does Osborne agree with this decision, which
nets about $5,250?
“What do you think?” Osborne says.
February 1998: Hallucinogenic drugs like
marijuana and LSD are legalized in the United
Stales.
August 1998: The House of Acid becomes
the major advertiser at California and insists
that the Bears’ football field be painted a dif
ferent color every five yards. LSD is sold at
games, though only in the lower deck for safety
reasons. Attendance doubles, but the univer
sity has a problem with spectators staying until
Wednesday.
January 1999: Texas A&T&M&W&X Tec
Totalcrs, with 22 starters who average 148
pounds, win their third straight national foot
ball championship when everyone else fails the
drug test.
January 2000: College athletics go com
pletely to pot.
(end of dream sequence)
“Wow, how awful. To think that slide may
have started already.
“Good thing I don’t drink Coors Light.”
Domeicr is a senior news-editorial major, a Daily
Nebraskan senior reporter and a columnist.
NU track runner turns
to cross country team
and scores victories
By Benji Greenberg
Staff Reporter
Coming to Nebraska as a track
runner without any experience in
cross country, Fran tcnBcnscl was
asked to try something different.
The new experience has been
the No. 2 runner behind team cap
tain Katie Fletcher on the Corn
husker women’s cross country team.
With Fletcher out because of
illness, tcnBcnscl won both meets
the team has competed in this sea
son - the Woody Grocno-Ncbraska
Invitational and the Doanc Invita
tional.
TenBensel was able to get
those wins because Huskcr coach
Jay Dirkscn, who also coaches the
distance runners on the track team,
was able to talk her into joining
when she arrived at Nebraska.
Dirksen’s reasoning for getting
tcnBcnscl on the team was to gel
her to pul more mileage in that
would work towards her distance
running and so she would be belter
prepared when track started.
With cross country season in
the fall, the track and field indoor
season following in January and
then the outdoor season starting in
March and lasting until laic spring,
the redshirt sophomore from Ara
pahoe said she was apprehensive
about running competitively prac
tically year round.
“Coming from a small school
in Nebraska, I didn’t know what to
expect because I had never run
cross country until 1 got to the
university and I was scared be
cause I thought I couldn’t do it,”
tenBcnsel said. “I thought I wasn’t
going to make it because of all the
training involved.”
She survived because of a strong
support group.
“1 consider Jay’s coaching and
the huge support I receive from my
family as the keys to my successful
running on the collegiate level,”
tenBcnsel said.
The competition in the Husk
ers’ first two meets was comprised
mostly of runners from small col
leges, and tenBcnsel said she knows
that from here on out the competi
tion only gels tougher. Still, she
said, her first and second ever col
legiate wins in cross country were
sweet.
“I didn’t expect to accomplish
what I did in the first two meets of
the season,” she said.
Dirkscn said that icnBcnsel’s
cross country training is ahead of
schedule.
See FRAN on 14
Coach excited to play Huskers
By Sara Bauder Schott
Staff Reporter
The Comhuskers will be favored,
but Brigham Young volley ball coach
Elaine Michael is said her team could
score an upset when the two teams
meet Friday.
"We’re just starting to come on,
and this game will be a real good
barometer for our team to measure
progress,” Michaelis said.
Brigham Young, ranked 12th, plays
No. 1 -ranked Nebraska on Friday at 7
p m. in the second match of this
weekend’s FirsTier Invitational at the
NU Coliseum.
Brigham Young has already lost to
a pair of ranked teams in No. 3 Pacific
— which gave Nebraska ils only loss
— and No. 4 Texas.
“We went five games with Texas,
and we had a chance to win that
match,” she said. “We feel like we
are making progress and improving.
Nebraska leads the scries 2-1, in
cluding a 3-0 sweep in 1986 in Provo,
Utah, at a time when Brigham Young
was ranked No. 1 in the nation.
Michaelis said playing Nebraska
will be good for her team.
“They are such a fine team,’ ’ she
said. “We are always excited to play
the best because it helps us get bet
ter** . , .
So fine that Michaelis thinks the
See BYU on 14
Softball team’s split with UNO
leaves NU coach soul-searching
By Paul Domeier
Senior Reporter
Nebraskacoach Ron Wolforth was
doing some soul-scarching Wednes
day night, and he said he had another
couple of hours of soul-scarching to
go
The Comhuskcrs had just split a
doublehcader with the University of
Nebraska at Omaha at the NU Soft
ball Complex, losing the first game 5
4 in nine innings and winning the
second game 5-1.
Wolforth called the second game
average, the first game poor. In the
-t t
Today it seemed like
every time we had a
chance to shut the
door, we didn’t get it
done.
Wolforth
NU softball coach
-11
opener, Nebraska twice had the bases
loaded with one out and failed to
score.
“Today it seemed like every time
we had a chance to shut the door, we
didn’t get it done,’ Wolforth said.
“Every time we had a chance to turn
the knife, we didn’t get it done.”
“To me that’s not luck, that’s mental
focus.”
The Huskcrs lose concentration
easily. The blame must start with the
head coach, Wolforth said .
Two specific lapses led to runs
when Nebraska needed to shut the
door. With one out in the third inning,
Nebraska third baseman Amy Er
lenbusch fielded a ball in the infield
and had UNO’s Michelle Strain rapped
off third base.
Erlenbusch froze Strain, but turned
and threw to first. Strain scored the
first UNO run.
In the ninth, UNO batter Carol
Bahun caught Nebraska moving into
a catcher-to-shortstop pickoff at third
base. Bahun lined the pitch just be
hind Husker shortstop Shac Sloan,
driving in the winning run.
Only a gift run from UNO in the
bottom of the seventh had sent the
game into extra innings at 3-3. Joy
Rishel scored on an error, stolen base,
fielder’s choice and passed ball on a
strikeout.
•ily Nebraskan
Nebraska’s Jennifer Stevens (4) beats the throw to University
of Nebraska at Omaha’s Linda Bartsch to safely reach first
base. The Cornhuskers split with UNO, losing the first game
and winning the second.
But after that run, UNO took an
eighth-inning lead. Nebraska tied the
game in the bottom of the inning, then
lost in the ninth.
“Once we score, then we instantly
relax,” Wolforth said.
He credited the scrappy UNO team
but said Nebraska has better athletes.
“It’s very concerning to me be
cause at the beginning of the year 1
tried to create a more relaxed atmos
phere,” Wolforth said.
The Huskers bounced back strong
in the second game. Nebraska turned
the knife this lime, scoring three runs
in the first on two singles, a walk and
two sacrifices. The Huskers added
two unearned runs in the sixth.
Pitcher Stephanie Skegas held UNO
to six hits and one walk. UNO’s only
run was unearned.
Nebraska will play again Tuesday
night at home against Nebraska
Wesleyan. Wolforth said the fall tribu
lations might still help the Huskers.
“If we say to ourselves, we really
have to go to work, this is all worth
it,” he said.
September 1990: The Nebraska athletic
department allows Coors to put Herbie Husker
on cans of Coors Light. The licensing move
raises about $5,000, though Coach Tom Osborne
expresses dismay with the school’s decision.
September 1990: Because of a gift from the
Adolph Coors Foundation (no direct link to the
beer company, but let’s be honest -- where did