Editorial
I Nebraskan
University of Nebraska-Lincoln
Curt Wagner. Editor, 472-1766
Amy Edwards, Editorial Page Editor
Jane Hirt, Managing Editor
Lee Rood, Associate News Editor
Diana Johnson, Wire Page Editor
Chuck Green, Copy Desk Chief
Lisa Donovan, Columnist
LB769 not realistic
Senators putting political concerns first
Once again some members of the Nebraska Legislature are
putting political considerations ahead of good policy considera
tions.
Currently senators arc debating LB769, a bill that would require pa
rental notification before a woman under the age of 19 could have an
abortion.
Proponents of the bill argue that they are keeping the best interests
of the pregnant minor in mindby attempting to improve family commu
nication. If proponents really believe that, they must be living in a
dream world.
Welcome to the real world.
In the real world, not every family is middle-class, two-parent and
supportive of its children. In die real world there is abuse. In the real
world there is incest. In the real world parents don’t like to discuss dif
ficult topics with their chi Idren and children don T want to burden their
parents with their problems. In the real world, pregnant teenagers
would rather confide in others than confide in abusive parents.
LB769 won’t work in the real world.
Proponents of LB769 also argue that a judicial bypass provided in
the bill gives an adequate opportunity for victims of abuse to escape the
parental notification requirement. The judicial bypass would allow a
pregnant minor to go to court and ask a judge who doesn’t know her to
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verstty of Minnesota, a state which has legislation similar to LB769,
show that the judicial bypass can be as stressful or more stressful for the
pregnant woman than having an abortion.
Another provision of LB769 allows the woman to have an abortion
if she declares that she is a victim of incest. But the provision also states
that “Notice of such declaration shall be made to the proper authori
ties.” Naturally, an investigation of the incident will follow. The
thought of an investigation could be enough to keep an incest victim,
afraid of more abuse, away from any authorities. And would such an in
vestigation really promote communication in an already troubled
family? Probably not.
Obviously, the real intent of LB769 is not to promote communica
tion but to prevent abortions. If that is the case, will the Legislature be
as willing to pay for the societal consequences that the bill will
produce? No.
Sens. David Bernard-Stcvens of North Platte and DiAnna Schimek
of Lincoln proposed an amendment to LB769 that would have appro
priated funds to pay for day care for children of mothers who are still
in high school. If senators are willing to keep minors from having
abortions, naturally resulting in more live births, they also should be
willing to pay for some of the costs of these new lives. But senators
: wouldn’t even consider such an amendment.
If LB769 passes, if will have devastating effects in the real world.
Pregnant teenagers will invent their ow n ways to get by the parental no
tification requirement. They will falsify identification. They will
obtain illegal abortions. They will run away. They will commit suicide.
Even if senators don ’ tagrec with abortion, they should not pass a bill
that will not only discriminate against minors, but will give teenagers
who already arc in trouble more problems.
-■ Jana Pe*mn
far the Daily Nebraskan
opinion_
Reader protests DN joke issue
I was shocked to read the Daily
Half-asskin insert (May 1). It is a rape
of journalism integrity, based on
freedom of the press. 1 had no idea
that we have regressed to the point
that we need to use vulgar and out
right deploraole journalism in the
name of humor and fun.
Chuck Green addressed an issue in
a forthright manner, but what was the
issue being addressed in the Daily
Half-asskin? I protest against the use
of vulgar sexual cartoons and Satanic
symbolism in the name of humor.
I will use the headline over
Green’s column, “God save the
Daily Nebraskan,” because we do
need help. Are our funds really used
to publish material like this?
George Ken
graduate assistant and
graduate student
Physical Education
Editor’s note: The DN prints 165
issues per year.
After Fund A student fee re
funds, the DN receives about
$38,500 - 94 cents per student per
semester.
Printing casts for this year s
joke issue were $460JO.
Student fee money is a lump sum
that is not allocated to a specific
issue or project. It is only allocated
to pay for a portion of the DN’s
printing costs. It could be allocated
different ways, however the DN
sees fit.
One way is to allocate student
fees to the first issues published
until money runs out Advertising
revenue would then take over. Us
ing this method, student fee sup
port would have run out first se
mester, therefore no fee money
would have been used for the joke
issue.
Student fees could also be allo
cated per issue. This works out to
$233 an issue. Since that amount
would have already been allocated
before the joke issue, the addition
of a joke issue would not add to
student fees.
If student fees are allocated by
the number of pages the DN prints,
then the joke issue would have used
about $96 in student fees, or about
four-tenths of a cent per student.
In all, except the last case, no
student fee money was used. The
DN receives less than 1 percent of
the total student fees collected. In
the last case, the joke issue used 0.2
percent of that 1 percent of student
fees.
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So where are the Christians?
Nets Forde’s seemingly laughable attacks may not be so funny
Sometimes it’s dilticult to be
mean to one’s fellow man.
Sure, calling someone a toad
is a little mean, but nonetheless
meant in good fun. It’s when some
one’s a real monster that sarcasm
bleeds you, makes you righteous,
makes you stink a little.
I can blame my upbringing for my
fear of hurting others. I sat through
enough Methodist sermons to paint
me moral.
As a kid, I would have rather
kissed Darla Adams than go to Sun
day morning church services. Darla
was a large, affectionate girl who
chased boys in fifth grade, but that’s
certainly a different story. You see,
our pastor was a cold, spent man who
repeated sermons from his younger,
more fervent days of ministry. Even a
kid could tell he was tired. His mes
sage was flat: nothing more than
quotes, nothing more than second
nature.
During a typical sermon, my pas
tor spoke like a butler, the two old
ladies in the front row nursed their
asinine church smiles, a few old men
snored, one baby cried and I designed
a scenario whereby I saved the con
gregation from a group of terrorists,
most of whom looked like Gene
Simmons — who as you well know is
the bass player for Kiss.
During most of each sermon I
would pray for my pastor to stop
talking; which never happened, giv
ing me early question marks on the
power of prayer. I also prayed that
angels would sing better than Mrs.
Davis, the choir’s first soprano who
single-handedly crucified Handel’s
Messiah.
What I've taken so long to get at is
that I’m not, and never have been, a
model Christian. However, I feel
guilty about hurting people, lying,
stealing and most of the other nasties:
virtues which at least make me a
decent citizen. ‘
Whether my morality is intrinsic
or learned doesn’t matter. I’ll accepi
my brain as a tabula rasa scribbled or
by a burned-out preacher because
buried somewhere in his stale ser
mons were the gems of Christianity.
Now, unlike my pastor who disfig
ured religion through indifference,
some people have learned to belter
mutate the teachings of Christ
through fervency. These arc the
people who, unlike the indifferent, do
infinitely more damage than good.
And on the University of Nc
braska-Lincoln campus we have our
own superstar of mutated Christian
ity, Ncls W. Forde, publisher of the
UNL Good News.
Admittedly, Forde’s “newspa
per” is too easy a target for sarcasm.
The paper has been a good joke for
most, a chance to read true lunacy.
The paper is fun to ridicule, Forde is
fun to mock.
In the latest issue of Good News,
Forde accused the Daily Nebraskan
editors of sacrilege for supporting the
installation of condom machines in
the residence halls. He said, “As
Christians, we criticize the Daily
Nebraskan’s advocacy of condom
distribution as encouraging fornica
tion, which is sin against God. It is the
result of a ‘reprobate mind’ in Ro
mans 1:28, and the chapter goes on to
say, ’... who, knowing the judgment
of God, that they who do such things
are worthy of death ..
First of all, Forde is saying that the
majority of the campus population is
worthy of death. I also can say that of
the minority he doesn’t say are wor
thy of death, most of those have been
trying pretty hard to become worthy.
Also, he accuses DN editors of
being sacrilegious for supporting the
machines and he accuses us of sup
porting sins against God. Now being
called sacrilegious, being accused of
slamming God and being told you’re
worthy of death can test anyone’s
sense of humor. But no, 1 don’t hate
him. Being called names I can
handle.
What I can’t handle is a man alien
ating real Christians by calling his
band the only true Christians.
Forde said, “When the Daily
Nebraskan calls someone ‘cvcr
rightcous’ it is cause for rejoicing,
though the comment was meant to be
snide and demeaning -- an all too
common tactic against Christians.''
In this quote from the most recent
Good News, Fordc was categorizing
Christians as those who come under
fire from what hccalls” liberals." He
even called us the “leftist editors of
the Daily Nebraskan,” an interesting
slap in the face for me -- a registered
Republican.
Fordc has labeled the far-right as
Christians. If you arc not reactionary,
you are not Christian. With this defi
nition, Forde has blasted most every
great reformer or humanist of h istory,
both Christian and secular. He has
blasted Christians by saying they’re
not Christians and he has blasted non
Christians for being non-Christians.
This is the dark and frightening
side of Forde -- he and others like him
have made a joke of Christianity. As
easily as I learned morality from ser
mons I cared little about, it seems just
as easy for Forde’s Good News to
covertly delegitimize Christianity.
By laughing at Forde and his twist
ing of scripture, people are forced
inadvertently — and I stress inadver
tently ~ to laugh at the teachings of
Christ. Forde has sowed mockery of
Christianity.
So Forde, your most disgusting
crime is the possible effect you could
have on good human beings whose
opinions have yet to be set in stone.
Your newspaper is a sin to God be
cause you mask the teachings of
Christ, you’re sacrilegious because
you revolt people from Christianity
and you’re worthy of death because
you have stopped thinking.
But my bored minister and 1 still
love you Forde, even though we’re
not real Christians.
Nelson is a Junior news-editorial major
and a DN associate news editor and editorial
columnist.
letter—
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