Let $waggart feed hi$ $heep, $aving$
Jimmy Swaggart, the TV
evangelist with a roving eye
for lewd women, says he’s
going to return to preaching in a few
weeks despite what his church elders
say.
They want him to hush up for at
least a year and spend two years being
counseled about straying from the
path of righteousness. As you recall,
he strayed all the way to those seedy
motels.
But Swaggart has decided that a
year or two is too long for his flock to
be deprived of his spiritual guidance.
So he’s going to get back to the pulpit
in May.
Ana i aon i oiame mm. why
should he be singled out for sterner
punishment than is meted out to oth
ers in his line of work?
We’ve read of dozens of show
business people — rock stars, actors,
actresses, comedians, movie produc
ers and others — who have been
busted for sniffing and smoking ille
gal herbs and spices. As quickly as
they make bond, they are back on
stage or screen earning their big
bucks.
We’ve lost count of the number of
star athletes who have done the same.
They snort white powder, miss a
Reader: Police need help
In response to the UNL Police
notice (Daily Nebraskan, March 5) it
seems obvious that a UNL policeman
would savor the opportunity to re
move a bicycle locked to a handrail.
When my locked bike was stolen
from in front of the union, they inex
cusably lost the report on the incident
two months later.
They are skilled in writing tickets
but can’t prevent thefts from occur
ring in parking lots during snow
storms. The mostappalling fact is that
they have statewide jurisdiction.
Now, I’m afraid to lock my bike to a
handrail in Crete. „
Enk Wagner
natural resources junior
game or two, spend a few weeks in a
rehab resort and return to their teams
as soon as their eyes become un
crossed.
Sometimes it is more than dope.
Now and then we read of a football
star forcing his masculine charms on
some helpless female in the basement
of a bar. He is arrested and stands trial.
But is that enough to get him
barred from earning a living for one or
two years?
Of course not. Just as soon as his
lawyer can settle with the female, he’s
back on the field.
me Ians aren t onenaea. iney
sometimes welcome the wayward
jocks with standing ovations.
So why shouldn’t Swaggart be
allowed to go back to work?
What’s that you say? He’s not a
rock star or an athlete. He is a
preacher, a man of the cloth, so he
should be held to different standards?
Nonsense. Rock stars are in show
biz. Professional athletes are in show
biz. And Jimmy Swaggart, preacher
though he be, is in show biz.
The rock stars are peddling music,
the comedians peddle laughs, the
athletes peddle violence and vicari
ous thrills.
Swaggart is peddling salvation,
i ■
Laser Visions
Sundays, 3:30 p.m.
April 10-Special 1958 Edition
April 17-Laser New Age
April 24-Fleetwood Mac
May 1-Special 1958 Edition
$3.50 Adults
$3.00 Students with ID
$2.00 Children 12 & under
Mueller Planetarium
Morril Hall State Museum
14th & U St.
-
with a little bit of religious bigotry
and intolerance thrown in.
Like the others, he’s out there on
the air waves hustling a buck. Mil
lions of bucks, since he’s been the
biggest of the show-biz preachers.
And he knows that being benched
for a year or two while some shrink
asks him when he first developed a
craving for dirty pictures is going to
cost him millions.
r—■ .. ■ ■■■■— .
L
Why, even before he made his
decision to return in May, he was
hustling his faithful followers for
whatever they can spare.
He sent out a mass mailing that
included these poignant lines:
“For some time Frances and I have
worked until the point of total exhaus
tion and in the midst of this, Satan was
trying to destroy me with a terrible
problem.”
He didn’t elaborate on what Satan
made him do, but I assume it was his
habit of putting on a jogging suit and
taking hookers to a motel. That Satan,
he gets such kinky ideas.
He went on: “Oh, the days and
nights spent in prayer, the tears shed,
the days of fasting.”
Not to mention, of course, the
dread that the motel keeper might not
be fooled by the sunglasses and recog
nize him.
“However, I think most of you
know that from the very moment this
tragedy began, even though I have
suffered humiliation and shame as
possible no human being on the face
oi me carm nas ever sunercu, i nave
done the right thing—and that is what
I want to emphasize.”
The right thing? Did he give the
hooker a generous tip?
“When I stood before the whole
world and repented, that was the right
thing to do.”
It was also the smartest thing to do.
It made for great show biz. He blub
bered. His kid blubbered. The audi
ence blubbered. I haven’t seen that
much effective sobbing since actress
Jane Wyman was in her weepy prime.
After blaming the devil for what he
did, rather than his own homy tenden
cies, he said:
“I have sought direction from God
as I have never sought it before and He
has told me in the very depths of my
being, ‘Feed My Sheep.’”
Does that mean that Swaggart is
going to do penance by working on a
sheep farm?
No, he explains: “Now I need your
help. I need your hand. I need your
heart. I need your prayers.”
And besides that, he needs your
greenbacks. And at the end of the
letter is the pitch. It’s the part the
faithful fill out, stuff in an envelope
and it says:
Yes, Brother bwaggart, you can
count on my support. Enclosed is my
gift of $_
So I say that S waggart shouldn ’ t be
treated differently than any of our
other show-biz figures who have their
little flings. Let him make his bucks.
If the Lord didn’t believe in free en
terprise, he wouldn’t have given us
computerized mailing lists.
And, as Swaggart said, he has an
urgent mission from God. He must
feed those sheep.
Or did he say fleece?
© 1988 The Chicago Tribune
Royko is a Pulitzer Prize-winning colum
nist with The Chicago Tribune.
ASUN UN-L STUDENT GOVERNMENT
CAMPUS WIDE VACANCIES
APPOINTMENTS BOARD: Review all applications and make ap
pointments for student representation to campus wide vacancies.
GOVERNMENT LIAISON COMMITTEE CHAIR: Coordinate
communication of the student view to government officials, adminis
trators and the community at large.
GLC REGISTERED LOBBYIST: Active lobbying for student con
cerns with various entities of govcmmemt.
Applications and information are available at
115 Nebraska Union. Deadline April 6,1988.
WHY go those I
small hole-in-the-wall bars?
Thursdays the BIG PARTY
is at
Ml9tGL‘£S
9TH & P
TROPICAL THURSDAY
& ROCK NIGHT
50$ Draws 75$ Mixed Drinks s
NO COVER ALL NIGHT 1
Hawaiian Dress (shorts, etc.) ■
Beer Relay at 11 p.m. ■
I POOL TABLES * VIDEO GAMES * DANCING * MUSIC S
VIDEOS * SPORTS BAR UPSTAIRS * ALL ROCK MUSIC [
Diamond Solitaire
Special
Diamond Solitaire in a Platinum &
18 Kt. Gold Ring
Reg. NOW
1 /8 ct $250 *195
1/5 ct $345 *295
1/4 ct $415 $32 5
1/3 ct $515 s395
3/8 ct $995 s795 j
1/2 ct $1295 *995 |
1 ct $2695 *1995
Diamond Pendant
Reg NOW
1/16 ct $165 *95 I
1/8 ct $210 s145 |
1/4 ct $365 s295 !
1/3 ct $485 s375 |
1/2 ct $1695 *995 i
1 ct $2495 ‘1995 |
h
.
! Diamond Earrings
| % Reg. NOW
\ I 1/1 Oct $165 *99
■%j 1/8 ct $215 s145 |
W& 1/5 ct $285 $195 I
fjy 1/3 ct $405 s298
