Thursday, April 23, 1987
Daily Nebraskan
Page 7
University Floral
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Glassy
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By Dave Meile
Saturday, 7 p.m., USA ch.
17
"Man With the Synthetic
Drain "(1971) John Carradine
Run for your lives, it's another
atrocious Al Adamson film! Don't
forget Al's patented formula: Point
a camera at some old horror-film
geezers babbling psuedo-scientific
claptrap, steal some footage from
another film, throw in a couple of
pathetic monsters, and whammo, a
stimulating melange of incoherence
and shoddiness. Bored with stealing
footage from other people, Adamson
stole parts of his own 1965 film
"Psycho a Go-Go," tacked on some
stuff and released it as "Fiend with
the Electronic Brain" in 1969. By
1971 Al, itching to steal again,
filmed :John Carradine and Kent
Taj lor, added it to the other junk
and released it as "Man with the
Synthetic Brain."
In the first five minutes of the
film, six people are choked by Aero,
a guy " : blue-green skin. Soon
paunchy, alcoholic, former Disney
star Tommy Kirk (as a detective)
receives a human head in the mail.
"That's it, the Corey case!" ex
claims the monkey's uncle.
His part " - expresses surprise.
"Wait a ;riirute, lieutenant. You
don't mean o time that dead guy
was broutfU back to life and
slaughter J all those people?"
Wow, talk about subtle nuances.
The amazing Corey case (told in 57
flashbacks) involves a Vietnam vet
with a shell fragment lodged in his
brain. Tired Dr. Carradine grabs a
metal hardhat with phone cords
attached, hooks it to the dude's
head and 'uns him into hideous
homicidal maniac with a synthetic
brain and an ugly 1965 haircut. The
third "film within a film" involves
Kent Taylor, who kidnaps whiny,
bad-acting Regina Carroll (Al Adam
son's wife) and shoots her up with
colored water. By then Aero has
shown up again, and Regina turns
into a hag while cool chicken-scratch
guitar plays on the soundtrack. Reg
ina, without benefit of talent (or
studying the script), calls him
"Aero." It was also released as
"Blood of Ghastly Horror." Horror
films don't get much worse than
this. Thank God.
Saturday, 10 p.m. USA, ch.
17
"The Invisible Ghost" (1941)
Beta Lugosi, Clarence Muse
Bela thinks his wife is dead, but
everytime he looks out the window,
he sees her on the lawn. This causes
him to walk around like a zombie
and choke people. Any cheapo '40s
movie with Bela puts lead in my
ft
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pencil, but there are two other rea
sons to watch this. It's directed by
the largely unsung Joseph Lewis,
who can usually give even the most
pedestrian of films a certain visual
flair. Second, watch for the classy
black actor Clarence Muse as Bela's
butler. While the role is hardly grat
ifying, Muse projects a kind of
unusual dignity; there is no disgust
ing "yessuh, boss" crap that so
many black actors had to put up
with during that period. Bela even
thanks Clarence for preparing his
meal.
Saturday, 1;30 a.m. VVOVVT,
ch. 6
' 'Con fessions of a Nazi Spy ' '
(1939) Edward G. Robinson
Eddie Robinson is always great,
and there's the usual-nice produc
tion in this Warner Bros, effort that
preceded WWII by several months.
Congress was sniping at the studio
about this film and others of its ilk
which they described as "war mon
gering" and "propagandistic." War
ners countered that it was based on
the drama that surrounded a real-life
Nazi espionage ring in the United
States in 1938. Watch for one of my
favorite movie villains, Martin Kos
leck as Joseph Goebbels. He was so
good at playing slimy Nazis that he
played Goebbels four times.
Saturday, 4:30 a.ra..WOOT,
ch. 6
"The Killer Shrews" (1959)
Ken Curtis, RoscoeP. Coltrane
I loathe Festus from the "Guns
moke" series. I seethe with rage
every time 1 see that shuffling gait
of his. That two-week stubble, the
cloying little rustic dialect, the
shameful devotion to Marshal Dil
lon. I hate it. I have a recurring
fantasy where all scraggly guys named
Festus, Fuzzy or Gabby are thrown
in a pit and ripped apart by carni
vorous mammals. "The Killer
Shrews," directed by Ray Kellogg in
1959, is the culmination of that
fantasy.
"Those who hunt by night wil tell
you that the wildest and most vicious
of all animals is the tiny shrew
The shrew deours everything. Bones.
Flesh. Marrow. . .everything," says
narratorexecutive co-producerstar
Gordon McClendon. McClendon, a
Texas millionaire, invented the Top
40 radio format, and if that's not
sufficient grounds for slaughter at
the hands of killer shrews, then I
don't know what it.
fewhere near the southern
o ist lies an island inhabited by
sector Sidney Lumet's brother
J
Baruch, his bad-acting daughter with
a Swedish accent, McLendon, sni
veling, pusillanimous little Festus,
and token minority Mario, the Mex
ican handyman. A storm is brewing,
and up sails Roscoe P. Coltrane
(James Best) from "Dukes of Haz
zard" and his black sidekick, Rook
(token minority No. 2). Doc Baruch
has been working on genes, metabo
lism and shrews, and soon the little
critters become giant killer shrews
(dogs with masks on their heads
and shag carpet samples on their
backs!) Hundreds (we only see about
six) of famished killer shrews have
surrounded the house, and they
start munching through the adobe
foundations. For some reason they
can't eat through a wooden fence
outside.
. Anyway, it is 1959, and it is the
South, so racism pervades as the
black guy and the Mexican guy are
the first to be devoured. The Swed
ish actress (Ingrid Goude) becomes
' so frightened that she breaks world
: records for cliche-spewing: "I love
an open fire, don't you." "The wind
has a lonesome sound, doesn't it?"
"You're a strange man; I never met a
man like you." Festus drinks a lot
and acts like a wimp, till the car-
petdogshrews munch him. At the
j end, Roscoe, the Doc and his daugh
ter, hide under some barrels and
duckwalk to safety. Despite all this
it's a bit more intelligent than most
low-budget horror flicks of the period
and loads of fun.
Director Ray Kellogg worked with
John Ford, and after directing "Killer
Shrews" and "Giant Gila Monster"
went on to do the totally macho,
militaristic film "The Green Berets"
with famous redneck John Wayne.
McLendon (who along with Fes
tus and Kellogg made "The Giant
Gila Monster" in '59) appeared on
the fantabulous "Lifestyles of the
Rich and Famous" and called "The
: Killer Shrews" "one of the worst
movies ever made." Them's fightin'
words, Gordo. He passed away last
year. There was no mention of shrews
in any of his obituaries. Set the
timer on the ole VCR.
Other stuff:
"Dark Passage" (1947)
Bogart and Bacall (Friday, 1
a.m. ch 6)
"Conflict" (1945) Bogart and
Sydney Greenstreet (Friday, 3
a.m. ch. 6)
"Cave of the Living Dead"
(1964) (Saturday, 1 p.m. ch
17
m
118 N. 14th
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