The daily Nebraskan. ([Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-current, September 25, 1986, Page Page 7, Image 7
Thursday, September 25, 1986 W r VI ... r j F i J F? rv r? Pi -.i m- k 11 l ri v$ U r? f? F; VI fl m-j t7 Fl f) u ! i ID tUfciey ITSmme "S3 B ? Pi ft F? ? P? mJl F? r? r? E5y Daily Nebraskan if f" IP ( ,, f 'Nun' i ... 7 - ft There are three more shopping days until Christmas. You thought you had all the time in the . world! You were wrong." ', "'y '-- This is the last Christmas pun I'll use in this article about the rock band. Christmas, appearing at Tooth's Gallery Saturday night at 8:30 p.m. Really. I promise. "We're not goo-goo-ga-ga and we're not childish,' insists bass player Dan. Salzmann, the man with the strange period after his first name. Watching Christmas is like watching a family at Christmas time after the parents gave in and bought their three hyperkinetic kids guitars, amplifiers and a trap set. "On the other hand, we're not gothic death rockers." No, they're not. Drummer Liz Cox, Wally Cox's daughter (Wally Cox was the top left-hand square on Hollywood Squares), looks like she just arrived from the prom dance. And there's a hint of Stephen King's "Carrie" in her drumming. She's sort of a demented Cyndi Lauper. Pee Wee Herman is her life. "I love Pee Wee to death," she said. That statement, managing to incorporate Pee Wee Herman the defender of innocent '50s childhood and death, pretty much defines Christmas. "Christmas is a real happy time and at the same time it's real sinister," Salzmann elab orated. "It's like those horror movies where the little children sing. By itself, the little kids singing is real happy, but in the context it's sinister." "During Christmas, you're afraid of disap pointing people and afraid of being disap , pointed. It's mad in all the stores . . . ." Christmas' debut LP, "In Excelsior Day glo" (psychedelia for classics students), on Big Time Records, is a potpourri of mutilated pop forms strung together on a knotty string of stop-start rhythms and hooky choruses that peter out before you have time to start sing ing along. It's like singing Christmas carols while your buggy old grandmother with the wobbles tries to bang the piano. One minute it's "Silent Night," the next it's "Jingle Bells" at a break-neck speed. Depending on which press release you read, Michael Cudahy, the trio's bratty guita rist, is either a 17-year-old master's candidate in anthropology at a prestigious university who's dumped that enterprise for his music, or a complete unknown out of nowhere. Depending on which press release you read, Cox is either pre-pubescent (doubtful) or still struggling through that "awkward stage" (still a bit unlikely). All the press releases show Salzman as the old man of the group. He says he's 28 (likely). What would Christmas like for Christmas? The best toy Salzmann ever saw was a 47-foot-high boa constrictor with a laser con trol panel. He said he didn't have time to read the owner's manual, but it looked like the toy was capable of a great deal. This leads Salzmann into a reverie about his childhood Christmases. The Salzmanns would drink mulled cider (Salzmann would not explain the term "mulling"), Mom would make up a "gigantic pot of Arabic squib beaks" and Dad would read the kids "The Night Before Christmas." Ah, home. Sacrilege is a big concern for Christmas. "When people called us X-mas," Cox said, "everyone thought we were a hardcore band." "If you call us X-mas, you might as well draw a circle around the A as well and we'll put bones in our noses," Salzmann interjected. "Not that we're not open to all kinds of witchcraft and druid ritual. We had an incan tation in Cleveland when the radiator blew up. A big Viking ship came out of the sky and took up to Ann Arbor," Salzmann said, by way of welcoming Lincoln's death rockers to come on out for the show. Christmas has been interviewed on MTV and their album and single, "Big Plans," are two of the top-selling independent releases in America. Salzmann says it would be nice to see a glimmer of a retirement plan, but he won't put salami down his pants to achieve it. Salzmann lives in the "Industrial Chinese" area of Boston where MTV and milk are not available. "You can get soy milk, but it's no good on cereal," he said. For the holidays, then, a little fame for Christmas. God Bless us, everyone. Christmas will cost you $3 this year. Page 7 vt I I V? 9 PS B $?' i "j 8 t; I Jj4 4 I .ft v v i u JKyi ff Js V 5