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About The daily Nebraskan. ([Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-current | View Entire Issue (March 13, 1985)
Wednesday, March 13, 1035 Daily Nebraskan Pago 9 RocWn Roll with THE HOT IK ' 1.1 j' ft J iff' t r 9-1:00 $1.50 5r Tnhii'Alf "I 1 .V S Editor's note: TMa b the final episode cfSps.cc 1j tlis FiC3 In last weed's episode, Jack Frost and tlte landing Bqusdi escaped from th3 Gsuoot village on tha planet Osg. Once in tta landing ped, thr rcad&svocsed with C.2 Argas. Once Jack was s:f:!y aboard ship, he found he had to wear a bulky suit and bubble sheped hdr.ct far 48 hours a precautionary measure against his bringing any alien viruses aboard ship. Though exhausted, Jack parked himself in the rec center. He thought he would watch a little box before retiring. The two clones, Floyd er.d Lloyd, were arm-wrcntlirg ajain Neither eaom&A tn fc vsinrtlv.n. Matt The show on the box wasn't bad it was a documentary about the life on jack's home planet, Earth, narrated by a Capt. Glutemate. A kind cf inter galactic Jacques Cousteaa, Glutemate and his crew came from the planet Sintax. They all locked like giant cucumbers with arms and legs, and Mister Potatohead eyes stuck all over them. In their spaceship, the SS Cellulite, Glutemate tad his crew traveled vast distances across space. These voyages were made possible by their undergo ing dormancies in suspended anima tion tanks. Crammed together in the huge glass vat of liquid they bore an amazing likeness to a jar cf kosher dills. When they arrived at a planet they would film the life found there. The film about Earth showed events such as a brood of dinosaurs hatching. Undetected, Glutemate also had filmed Julius Ceasar stalking and swatting a fly as it scampered across a map, as well as taking rare footage of Bee thoven, who was shewn resting his head on his piano in an effort to hear himself playing. In one scene, Glutemate'a crew chased and caught an early East Afri can hominid. As he tagged its ear and attached a radio tracking device, the creature strayed wildly. Jack was peeved because nobody else wanted to watch the documentary. Of the 35 persons in the rec center, only five were Earthlings. Someone witched the channel to the "Water-Boy Squirrel-Girl Action Hour," the nest popular show onboard ship, though its creators had died 200 years before. Its . signals were Just now reaching the areas the Argus patrolled. The show recounted the adventures cf Chad Sorensen and Mindy Danko. Chad had been bitten by & radioactive seal while mowing the lawn cf his par ents' cottage on Martha's vineyard. Thereafter, Chad had the power to charge into a liquid at will he could flow underneath doors, hide in a garden hose or escape down a drain. Mindy, a park ranger, had unwit tingly eaten some acoras from a tree that housed a forest demon. Thereafter she could climb right up skyscrapers, carry confiscated weapons m evidence in her flexible cheeks, and gnaw through metal and concrete as if it were butter. These two joined forces to fight crime and wore colorful costumes when doing so. What's mere, three time an hour they would pick up guitars, sin? and dance their songs usually bore a lesson, such as the importance cf maintaining a stringent oral hygiene program. The shew was lnteruptcd: (me cf the navisitcrs read a bulletin over the loudspeakers. Hie ship was to stop at Earth, in order to pick up shipments of pine seedlings, carp f,r-;lh3 and plankton, as well es SCO electric gui tars and 20.C00 pink phytic naming for lawn and garden display. The flamlrgos were about the only thing Eath was particularly noted for. They really caught on throughout the galaxy, even on planets that had no creatures even vaguely resembling flamingos. Jack was curious about what his home planet was like now. Since leav ing he had traveled across seven space "time sones" everybody he had known there had been dead 00 years. He glanced out a window as the Argus' engines kicked in. 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