Friday, November 16, 1984
Pago 18
Daily Nebraskan
as Vegas
Humor by John Meissner
Daily Nebraskan Staff Eeporter
This is the first in a two part Daily Ncbrssan
series.
Las Vegas (AP) A college student, vacationing in
Las Vegas for the first time, succumbed to earthly
pleasures Sunday. He was 21.
Chrb Mason, a civil engineering major at the University
of Wisconsin, was discovered by his parents on the
outskirts of town, wrapped in a bordello.
Police refused to speculate on the matter, other than
acknowledging the embarrassed Mason "smeiled of
alcohol and prurience."
"I think it's something best left up to the youth's
parents," Captain Ty Rickover said, turning in his badge.
Mason's father, Dixon, admitted he was deeply dis
turbed "with my son's behavior, that is" and
promised complete reparation.
"Mason will be busy writing letters of apology to
earthly pi
easures seduce student
everyone who sees this article," he said. "And to his
minister. And the people whose job it is to stock cheese
in supermarkets. Possibly the 1988 U.S. Equestrian
team. We're not taking any chances."
The elder Mason called the bagnio (known to locals as
the Hotel Melliferous) a "seething den of inequity (sic)."
He blamed himself for his son's demise.
"I knew better than to let him come to this modern day
Sodom and Gomorrah," Mason said, endearing himself
to thousands of Las Vegas residents. "Chris came out
here with one intention to get corrupted."
Chris' cathouse companion, Cricket LaWells, termed
the elder Mason's response "Feckless didacticism, stan
dard currency for wet-blankets and flaccid ultra-conservatives."
She stopped short of branding him a male
volent puritan, however.
"That's not my style," she purred. "Besides, he's burned
up because he thinks his son failed him, you know?"
LaWells described Chris as "sweet, but terribly scared.
He was reluctant to even come inside. He must have
walked by the place seven times."
"I think he was afraid of getting caught and of the
potential repercussions if someone did find out
especially someone on the 10G3 U.S. Equestrian team,
she continued. "When his parents barged in not five
minutes later we were still pre-coitaltdng, I swear it
it's like Chris freaked out. Something snapped, you
know? It was a red bummer."
"Chris screamed, said he couldn't live with the shame.
I wish he could have been a little quieter, for the other
customers' sakes. It wouldn't surprise me, though, if ns
father's truculence dooms Chris to life in a mental
hospital," she said.
Father Mason scoffed at LaWells' assessment. "Chrb
will recover, although the ridicule and scorn I subject
him to should vex him for a few years. Since when do you
give any weight to the moral Judgements of a hussy,
anyway," he demanded.
"I'm an insurance salesman, and if I handled my
clients like she handled hers...Well, never mind."
Wayne Newton, opening for the Beach Boys, was
unavailable for comment.
01
faction ieadera to particlnste in
public f brain
Representatives from the three
warring factions in El Salvador
are featured in a public forum,
"El Salvador: The Road to Peace,"
tonight at 10 p.m. on NFTV, chan
nel 12 or 13 on your television
dial
The program, produced by Los
Angeles public television station
KCET and the Center for the
Study of Democratic Institutions,
based in Santa Barbara, Cal., was
videotaped Wednesday and will
consist of a discussion and debate
among leaders of the Salvadoran
left, Center and Right. Allen
Weinstein, president of the cen
ter and former host of the PBS
series "Inside Washington," will
moderate the forum, which will
be conducted in English.
Participants who have commit- FMLN.
ted to appear on the program
include representatives of the
Right: Raul Molina, Party of Na
tional Conciliation, and Fransico
Quinones, Popular Salvadoran
Party. Representing the Center
are Ray Prcndes, Ministry of the
President, Secretary General,
Christian Democratic Party, and
Ricardo Gonzales Camacho, Min
ister of Economics, Democratic
Action Party. The Left is repres
ented by Reuben Zamorra and
Hector Oqueli, both of the FDR
Program producers hope that
Salvadoran President Jose Napo
lean Duarte will decide to partic
ipate in the forum, either in per
son or via satellite.
The format of the discussion
likely will examine the causes of
the war in El Salvador, the cur
rent state of democracy there
and the prospects for peace.
Also participating in the dis
cussions will be an in-studio
audience, representing a spectrum
of American views on El Salva
dor, including elected officials,
State Department representatives,
academics and El Salvadoran
exiles now living in southern
California-
Auditions scheduled
for The Messiah'
Auditions for solos in the
UNL performance of Handel's
"The Messiah" will be held Sun
day in Westbrook Music Build
ing. Experienced soloists should
call 472-2503 for an audition
appointment. Auditions will
begin at 1 :30 p.m. and will be in
room 119.
The performance of "The
Messiah" will be Dec. 6 at 7:30
p.m.
CLASSIFIES ADVERTISING
CALL 472-22S4
$2.50 minimum charge per day on commercial ads.
Tan words included.
$2.00 minimum charge per day on individual student
and student organization ads.
$.75 biUing charge on noncommercial ads. All
personal ads must be prepaid.
NO REFUNDS ON PRE-PAID ADS.
NO RESPONSIBILITY ASSUMED FOR MORE THAN
ONE INCORRECT INSERTION.
FOUND ads may be submitted free of charge.
DEADLINE:
1 p.m. day before publication (Monday through
Friday).
The Daily Nebraskan will not knowingly accept help
wanted ads from businesses that are not equal
opportunity employers.
Pair of tickets NU-OU male and female. Call 478-8X0
3 female NU-OU tickets together. Call 464-3234
until 1 :00 p.m. or after 6:30 p.m.
Sow Hunting Equipment New and Used. 6 bows,
assorted draw lengths. 423-7023.
litis iftitt
PEACH CHEWING TOBACCO
Cliff's Smoke Shop
1200 "O' Street
One male and one female NU-OU ticket. 477-9811.
PEACH CHEWING TOBACCO
Cliff's Smoke Shop
1200 Street
Thanks toyou...
it works...
for ALL OF US
Planning to see New York or just collecting coins?
N Y C. Bus & Train Tokens available at 474-9772. Ask
for Mr. New York.
SLAVE SERVICES
The Pledges of Triangle Fraternity are selling their
services to raise money for their pledge project. We
will do odd jobs at reasonable rates. Call 472-0131,
472-0589, 472-8780, or 472-0128.
TWO SPRINGSTEEN TICKETS
C-Section, Row 10.
Call James 2-8274
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN TICKETS
4 on Floor
Best Offer 472-8829
DOD Distortion Pedal, $40; 1 pair 8", 2-way speakers,
$30. 476-1693, Blaine.
Snow skis. K2-185. Look N77 bindings. Lang boots.
Scott poles. 475-6869.
CHERRY CHEWING TOBACCO
Cliffs Smoke Shcp
1200 "O" Street
VINTAGE CLOTHING Women's good con
dition, 1940 s & 50 s; other clothing. 1837 C
indoors Friday 3-6, Saturday 9-5.
(VlZOUSE OF FLOWERSWf
if a When vou can't be there,
1' flowers say it best! Send f
a fresh i nantisgiving
centerpiece from the
House ot Mowers!
226 S. 11th
476-2775
Visa Vtafitv rhiw
Diners-Carte Blanche
American Express
CZTw' J
t l ;
I, Jl
i v i i if ) in
KBGT
hD ) R
v j n ; ; J
f 1 f t s '
'(()) J Hi"
I: til f$f
Two OU-Neb Tickets. Male or female. Good seats,
call 477-902.
6 Springsteen tickets together C-21 very
reasonable. Call 472-0434 Scott.
Free Springsteen ticket with the purchase of Lighter
$50.00 or best offer very good seats. 4 a vail. Call Phil at
435-3756.
2 tickets to Springsteen. 14th row. Floor. 2 male
tickets OU-NU game. 476-3519.
WATERBED, super single $50. Two men's bikes $50
each. Call 464-3530 after 6 p.m.
1 female ticket for Oklahoma game. 474-2754. Best
offer.
2 NU-OU tickets - best offer. 477-5892.
One male OU-NU football ticket $30.00or best offer.
423-2861.
NEED TICKET?
NU vs. OU tickets and Bruce Springsteen tickets
available. Call after 7 p.m. 421-1236. Give your
best orferi
SPRINGSTEEN TICKETS, 3 Front row seats, best
offer, call 472-9609 or 472-9049.
5 Springsteen tickets. Good Seats. 466-7874.
Two Female NU-OU tickets. Best offer 475-503S.
Male ticket with spouse. Best offer by 6 p.m.
435-5076.
Springsteen tickets 2nd Row Center. Best offer.
474-3161 or 476-8447.
Pioneer RT 707, Brand X Falcon Speakers. King Size
Waterbed, 468-6168.
1 female student ticket for OU-NU gam. Call 423
2727 after 4:00.
3 Female, 1 Male OU-NU ticket. Best offer. 476-6828
or 421-1313.
Sinole Springsteen Tickets. Price negotiable. Call
476-&71.
rwe Springsteen; C-15. 1st Row. Call Mike,
474-7286. , '
??riwi$n tscketa. 4 tickets, Row 3 Floor A-2. Bee'i
Oftar. 472-8317.
Male OK Football ticket. 4eS-C060.
TWO FEMALE TICKETS
Same section, good seats. Price negotiable. Call
435-5101. KEEP TRYING.
Two Springsteen tickets. Cull Mike at 423-3854.
SPRINGSTEEN TICKETS FOR SALE. Floor anc C
Sections. 476-8514.
1976 Fiat Spyder-Biack
No reasonable offer declined!
464-3438 after 5:00
Ford Grand Torino 2 door everything under hood
new. 1972 best offer in cash buys it. Call 472-2588,
ask for Jeff S. and or Mona.
'84 Cavalier Type 10 Hatchback Coupe loaded, 300
mils, very reasonably priced. Call Dan at 475-7315
DLR.
1SS3 Chevy S-10 Blazer. V-6, 4 speed, 4-wheel drive.
423-7C23.
78 TRIUMPH TR-7
Excellent Condition
Mega-Reasonable 472-SS29
I need couples and males tickets to the Oklahoma
football game. Will give collateral for tickets if wanted.
Please contact 487-5068 after 5:30 on Thursday and
Friday.
Wanted: 2 tickets to On-Tour 84'. Will pay $300 cash.
71 Dodge Coronet Green. 72.000 original mile- Male & Female "together" OU tickets. Will pay $30
age. Runs excellent. Heating and air conditioner. Just for both. Mike 478-3400.
for students. Price only $495.00. Call 464-6315 even- ;
ings or 464-5261 days.
Skiing 2 bedroom Condo in Diilion, Colo. 4S3
5297. 423-1963, Extras!!
1 BR, close to campus, remodeled. $225 all utilities
paid. 477-5383.
One bedroom. Parking, laundry, utilities paid $195
per month. 2530 "O ". 477-9009 after 5 p.m.
Two bedroom house available after Thanksgiving.
$310 per montn plus utilities. Near East Campus. 477-3121.
NEW 23rd & T"
2 badroom 335-350.
1 bedroom 250-265.
$.?O0 deposit
Available Deccimber 1st
423-3614 486-45S9
Four $180 payments semester
18 meals week included
Brown Pslace Inc.
University Approved Cooperative Housing
476-2583
Need ride to St. Louis over Break. 435-6500.
Wanted: 2 male tickets to NU vs. OU; 474-0287.
J Wanted: Two Student Season Basketball tickets; 1
male, 1 female 472-0095.
I'.sffiiiff'fHftS'
Needed: Responsible female roommate. Nice duplex
near City Campus. Good neighborhood. $1 50 plus 12
gas and electricity. After 6:30 p.m. 435-8046.
"Female or Male to live in with wheelchair male
starting in January. Free RoomBoard. Little help.
475-5228"
Female roommate, $130, 27th & "F", near bus,
laundry, grocery, 435-7695.
Apartment full of BOZOS7 Share a HOUSE. $1 30
plus 12 utilities. 435-1627, ovenings.
L
li:!
Stolzen hogpen.
Congratulation! You're a big girl now. Good Luck
with 19. Love yal
Ted and B.C.
Godfather's Pizza now hiring for pt day and night
cashier. Day cashier must be available M-W-F from
10:30 a.m. 2:00 p.m. Apply In person at 12tM & Q.
BASiC Programmer Project Involves program
ming a micro to simulate a financial market accessed
through phone lines. Experienc with communications
desired, especially the DC Hayes Smart Modem.
Interested parties should leave or send resume to Dale
Kennedy, Room 233. Advanced Programs, CBA.
Lose WeightMake Money
Apply in person onM
1342 "0" St.
If yuYe looking for part-time help, look at the
103 CA3 '
Outsldft lia Ates4rs28fi BuRfef
A variety cf jobs are HsieJ every day. The service is
tree, and can help save you time and money.
Counter help evening and weekend hours. Day
hours during Christmay-New Year's break. Apoly Irs
P?on before 5 p.m. frl., Nov. 13 Peanut Shack,
fkywaik Level-Centrum.
Permanent part-time position available. Weekday,
evenings and Setordey mornings. Call 475-6904. Ask
tor Alan.
DJK
You're a special pan of my life ... I love youl
JLD
Part-time afternoons and evenings, 16-18 hrs.wfc
Start after Thanksgiving. Apply in person. Mite's "O"
Street Drive-In, 22nd & O.
I
Wanted: 5 student tickets for NU-OU came Call
474-3901.
V.W. Seatlfcs wrecked or not running. 466-7516
leave message.
One female or sesson ticket OU vs NU AX
YOU PaiCE. Call 477-8510 tor Melody.
Wanted: Journalism students to sell advertising for
a new newspaper in Lincoln. Volunteer basis Great
experience. Call Barb at 423-01 28
3.M.P.
We make a great team. You're stealing my heart.
Onward to South Padre.
BS.
UNL TRADITIONAL BON FIRE
...REIGNITEDI
TONIGHTI
Mr. P.
Happy Anniversary Sweetheart! -'hanks for the best
year ever. I love you.
Carmen
DoblV..
Have a super 19th but remember: If it's sink or swim
dogpaddlet CARPI! Who cuts your hair? Don't
worry about your present. (Hint. It gets bigger than a
bread box!)
BabytalkTt
S;eve,
What's funnier than en engineer in a drunken
stupor? . . . Also: Toe bsd you don't have a car to wreck
on your b-day. But senous ly. Have a Happy B-dsy!
Your "Rambler" bed buddies.
A.K. & T.
Section 13:
Fire up to WAVE the Sooners right out of Nebraska
on Saturday!
The Beta Sig's
Mark (trombone).
Thanks for the memories . . .
. . . where are the busses?
... on the road to the land of ahs
(honk of you're a huskerl)
. . . Passing at 60 mph
. . . tplit-second pit stops
. . . detours left or right?!
. . . hours of tur.es
. . . expert map reading
(upside down?)
. . . dead battery
. . . folio trtet Ryder!
. . . gasoline overflow
Lost: swMtahirt, giove, etc
Gained: insights, friendship!
What an adventure how about Miami?!
Your co-pilot (trumpet)
