Pago 4 . Dally Nebraskan . Monday, October 1,1034
yields few i
It was a pure political move
from start to finish. Presi
dent Reagan's meeting with
Andrei Gromyko was an election
year coup, but the results weren't
laudable.
After four years of aloof, cool
haughtiness and outright hostil
ity toward the Soviets, Reagan
chose to break the ice at a most
opportune time six weeks
before the election. Up until now
Reagan has stood by his all-American
guns when it came to dealing
with what he called the "evil em
pire." But Reagan was all smiles when
Gromyko, a central figure in that
empire, dropped by the White
House.
Reagan wasnt willing to give any
ground and neither were the So
viets, and there will be no sche
dule for future talks, as our pres
ident had hoped. Secretary of
State George Shultz said Satur-
vsv3 Wy p F t fen
AN yew days...
L W ' ii f l
day that "among other things, we
have agreed to keep in touch. . ."
That's comforting.
World population continues to
grow at an incredible rate, put
ting pressure on a number of
resources and on relations bet
ween countries. During the last
week the earth's population in
creased by 1,591,781 people, ac
cording to an article in Sunday's
Omaha World-Herald.
Another World-Herald article
said the world community would
grow by 83 million hungry mouths,
mostly in Africa, Asia and Latin
America' the three areas which
have the least resources to deal
with such expansion.
Although birth control pro
grams have slowed the popula
tion explosion slightly, estimates
have the population continuing
eagan-Gromyko meeting: Wka
i thepTess I
ut
adio and newspaper reports of
Ronald Reagan's Friday meeting
with Andrei Gromyko left me
struggling to envision the scene of action.
Freeze frame images zipped through my
mind: the two statesmen arguing toe to
toe, Gromyko scowling at an overabun
dance of reporters, George Shultz dodg
ing questions and the two statesmen
again, surrounded by aides, chatting at
fireside in the Oval Office and posing for
i Christopher
LHiK J? .. L L
pictures.,
Freeze frames never quite tell the whole
story, nor does the press. So we folks who
aren't on the scene have to fill in the
blanks. Here, then, is the rest of the story.
President Reagan, Vice President Bush
and Secretary of State George Shultz
stand on the White House lawn. Bush
and Shultz flank the president, two dis
passionate seeing eye dogs. Reagan appears
nervous, tapping his toe and humming .
the Notre Dame Victory March,
Photographers, reporters and mini
cam operators mill about, checking equip
ment and clearing their throats. A sleek
limousine slides up to the curb, and Bush
is dispassionate no longer.
Bush (pointing at Gromyko who is
climbing out of his car): "That's him I
know it's him, we learned it at spy school.
It's always the guy in the back of the limo."
Gromyko and the president approach
each ether, smiling, each ivith hand ex
tended. A voice stops them two feet apart.
Minicam 1 : Hold it right there, gentlemen.
Let's get some pictures.
The press descends. Thirty minutes
later, the two men still stand two feet
apart, still with hands extended, but
Gromyko, whose hair is now tousled,
doesn 't smile quite so brightly. ,
Gromyko (through his teeth): We could
have been done by now, you bimbo.
Reagan (through his teeth): Well, Andy,
that's entertainment.
Gromyko (now frowning openly): Let's
get on with it.
Reagan: Sure, Andy, whatever you say.
But I'd like to talk with you in private
first, you know no aides, just you and
me for a few minutes.
Gromyko: Alright. Best of three falls?
Reagan: No holds barred?
Gromyko: Agreed.
Reagan: Agreed.
Hie two men disappear into the White
House, They doff their coats and ties, roll
to expand. The World-Herald art- The pressures on the environ- in educating the people of Third
icle said at the present 1.7 per- meat, resources and interna- World nations of the dangers of
cent growth rate the world will tional relations will be great the explosion. Th population
have 6.25 billion people by the the United States needs to lend a bomb needs to be diffused as
year 2000. helping hand wherever possible soon as possible.
efto
Nancy Reagan enters the Oval Office,
starts a nice fire and wipes the blood off
her husband's nose. Shultz, Bush and
Soviet Ambassador Anatoly Dobrynin
enter. Nancy exits, then reenters, bring
ing hot chocolate and svgar cookies for
all the boys.
Bush: The Cubs have a lock on it.
Dobrynin: No way. The PadresU whup
'em.
Gromyko: Forget guys, Detroit's the
class of the league. They've got the hitting
and the pitching, and Spar ley's been there
before.
Reagan: It doesn't really matter who
wins. The Angels and LA won't be there.
So who cares?
Nancy: What about missiles?
Reagan: Shoo, dear; we're talking.
The door opens and releases anottier
flood of photographers. Gromyko, with
one of his pant legs torn off, manages to
push through the crowd and out the door.
Shultz stays and talks to the reporters.
Reporter 1: How did the talks go, Mr.
Secretary?
Shultz: Ummmm. . .Intense and useful.
Reporter 2: What did you accomplish?
Shultz: Ummmm. . .We cleared the air.
Reporter 3: Did you agree on anything?
Shultz: Ummmm. . .No, but things look
pretty good for the Tigers.
up their sleeves and begin to grapple.
Three quick moves by Reagan put Gro
myko in a painful figure four leglock.
Gromyko, arching his back in agony,
notices a crowd on the other side of the
Oval Office glass doors.
Gromyko: This is privacy?
Reagan: Well, Andy. . .
Gromyko (wrenching loose and duking
the president in the eye): Well my clavicle,
you muttonhead.
Reagan (returning the blow): Ths one's
for the Gipper, Pinko.
The two men stand toe to toe, pounding
away at each other. The fisticuffs reach a
peak, then the action slows as the pugi
lists tire.
Reagan: Give?
Shultz: Uh uh. Do you?
Reagan: No way.
Biff, bam.
Shultz: Now?
Reagan: I will if you will.
Shultz: It's a deal Shake?'
Reagan extends his hand, and Gro
myko feigns a blow to the president s
head. Reagan steps backward. Gromyko
laughs and pats Reagan on the back.
Gromyko: Just kidding.
Reagan: You're a laugh a minute, Andy.
Gromyko: And youVe got a helluva
right cross, Ron.
i j ft Daily i
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CHAIRPERSONS
more BlaMiiM after school
mework brings guilt, extra duties
Mo
For parents, Iio
I was going to write something about the defense
budget or maybe something incredibly unique
about the religion-in-politics issue, but I do not
have the time. I have to go home and do my homework.
The homework I speak of is not really mine, it's my
son's; and I don't really do it, he does. Still, either my wife
or I has to be there and available for consultation since
he expects it, the school expects it and so does society at
large. It is, I think, the only way we will beat the Japanese
and once again be an unsurpassed great power.
The first thing to be said about this is that my parents
Cohen
never helped me with homework when I was a kid. I
have checked with everyone I know and they all say this
is the case. My parents held the quaint view that the
homework was mine and that I should do it. They did
other things. They watched television or played cards,
and say what you will about this, S A.T. scores were high
and cars were made in America.
The second thing to say is that there wasn't all that
much homework. In fact, I dont remember there being
much until high school I remember, instead, playing
after school, which was a thing kids did in those days.
Not any more. Now, it is routine for kids to get home
work in the first grade and for the load to increase
progressively from one grade to the next. By the time my
son reaches high school, he will be doing homework
non-stop.
Being an educated, erudite, sophisticated person, I
understand the need for homework. In theory, it instills
discipline and encourages work habits, although in fact
it does nothing of the sort at least not with boys.
Instead it instills a loathing for school and turns learn
ing into both a chore and an obligation something
that's just not fun. If you think match drills are fun,
there's something wrong with you.
But the awful truth is that no one complains because
the schools play on our guilt as working parents. They
know that deep down we suspect that the theory of
"quality time is pure garbage and that we're sacrificing
our children for the sake of our careers.
Still, after all these years 1 do not fully understand the
new rules of homework. When I was a kid and turned in
lousy homework, my father would yell at me, cut my
allowance and go back to whatever he was doing. He
operated under the theory that it was my homework,
not his, and that if I got it wrong it was because I was a
dummy. Now, homework has become a faiaily endeavor
and mistakes are not my son's, but ail of ours. I cannot
permit mistakes because I cannot permit ths teacher to
think either that I did not know better or, worse yet, did
not help my son, which means, that I do not love him.