Tuesday, October 10, 1C33
Candidate
Daily Ncbrcskcn
Pug 3 b
rost jiimipsto iiie rescue
vu- nuLniiin s recent ceciclon net to run c-ainet
Sen. J. JaniC3 Exon has left the Republican Party in
eoiacthir.;; cf a carina. If they dent find a candi
date seen, they v.U be faced with two horrible
options: cne, the unprecedented phenomenon cf
having no republican senatorial candidate or two,
John D?C?re'3 ce.nti,i"y
meat. After all, It docs deal with the outdoors.
Finally the L:ue cf defense. Ctccldn America's
ccntinua!!y expandin3 are end accounts for a mrjor
chunk cf the federal budget. Therefore, we need to
co me up with a cheap alternative to wee pons. Come
cynies would say peace, but remember, I'm a Repub
licsn now. .
I would propose a new way to VrlX wars. If,
heaven forbid, we are ever drawn into a situation
where we are forced to ena in battle to preserve
democracy (or If the commies us on), we should
have a beet-of-seven tournament cf some sort I'd
ray chess, but the Ruee'ans would beat us at that
Maybe something more dfjnined and cerebral like
pci;en
I look forward to the camp!n 3 a time far cn
Intelligent exchange cf ideas, rather than as an
opportunity for name-calling Finally, I'd like to
leave you with my own campaign sicken: "Dent vote
for Exon; he's a jerk." Thank you.
site i-TCZt
Thb h V.hv I have Inr-snpd tn th rrH Tf l
Creat honor and sense of duty that I announce my
cLfuiu iita.ii iioKimttion ser ine
There are a couple of technicalities I must
address before I start my formal campaigning One
13 the fact that I'm net a Republican. However, I
don't consider that a mrjor barrier. Although I'm
not a registered Republican, IVe clivaya considered
the party a haven of virtue, intelligence and political
fair-play.
It'd be just like those dirty Republicans to do
something like accusing me cf being a Democrat, so I
. have an alternative. If they won't let me run eainst
Exon, 111 run against Edward Zorinsfcy. In that case,
it'd be a Republican running on the Democratic
ticket against a Democrat on the Republican ticket.
And they say Nebraskans dont understand parti
san politics." t
The ether technicality h that in order to run for
the Senate, you're supposed to be 20. I'm only 21.
, This concerned me for awhile until I figured, what
are they going to do, card me? '
111 just carefully sidestep the ee issue throughout
the campaign. For example, if one of those smart
mouthed reporters says to me, Hey, you don't look
00," 111 respond, "Really? Why, thank you. Nobody's
ever said that before." Once I'm elected, theyll be too
embarrassed to brin up the issue tain.
Believe me, I hate to start the campaign with this
note of deception. Normally, I would never think of
usurping the system that our forefathers so care
fully devised to ensure a fair election. However,
something inside me tells me IH be the most for
thright, honest and principled senator this state has
ever had, even if I have to cheat to win. Besides, I
need to do something after I graduate.
My campaign will stress issues. This country faces
a number of financial diScultias, including sky-
lYlfcf I ''f rf if 4 a f
interest rate3. Lleasurcs need to be enacted to avoid
financial collapse. I have a few caseations.
Postage stamps could be made contraband. This
way a 20-cent stamp would have a street value of
The state of Idaho could be made into a theme
park. The revenue from "Spudland," as well as the
use of Sammy Spud in commercials, could go
directly into federal government coffers.
Regulation cf industry also eats up an unneces-
sarily large portion cf the'natienal budget I would
introduce legislation tht would give incentives to
businesses to se'J-regulate. For example if they ;
didn't cooperate, they would be forced to read Paid .
Harvey's column for a weclc-' ' '
' Honesty and openness in government is another
theme we need to explore. Too often, governmental
agencies seem to be pursuing confusing policies.
Therefore, if I were elected, I would propose legMa-'
it the Exterior Depart-
n tnat vsouia re-name
T 8 ri Daily
EDITOR Urry ::rks.
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In
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'And phyfng Thurctlny hSghS,
JACK BOUJrJO.
a chct cn O'CItGLO tlEHTUCItY
counnAcn.
mltottt. f
CiilSlrclCSliDa
7G-GG0G
Beer, Wine,
Cocktails and
Off sale available:
, wwwwv
I i incivtdual tickets for tha fowowing events
i on se!a on!v to U.'L CcJonts beainnina
i f - October 17. On tz.'3 to ctsrs beginning
October 24.
nmlnn Ecrly U.uzlc Group
Vrth the support of tfis : . " ; .-
Nebraska Arts Council -
Four Instrumentalists, a scprano and tsnor
wiil give aud;enc9 msmbsrs a of music from
the Italian Renaissance end the Early Baroque
with lutes, guitars, flutes, and viols.
Rulh K. Scscrsst f.'cmorid Concert
Allclo cl3 Lcrmclia, pSnno
With the support of the Nebraska Arts Council .
The queen of pianists, de Larrocha is -especially
eccslimed for her performance
of music by Epish compocsrs. Her program
will include the mudc cf Ccsihoven
and Granados, pne of Spain's great composers.
y ry-
, Wr''-y" ""'r . I ;
: . V f
v .
I . V, - II
:C;iioDe!!e2
A f.".;d-Amcf ica Arts Alliance Program
A cross bctA-crn the Jeffrey and Feld Callct
companies, this comply h3 a uniquely refined
sty! 3 of Its own. Led by German choreographer
HsinzPcll o ;
rt!ie7,r:3ii ttcei -
ZJizir:, Xlzt 12 ct tpm
cr.e,t:;vi3ttepni
(Children will be admli'.sd to the Sunday
performance as UrJL Student discounted price)
claud:o rcrTEVEnDis
. . ! I - J
j VI7 s j - i el j i j
Thursday, October 27 at 3 pm
Saturday, October 29 at 3 pm
Sunday, October 20 st 3 pm
Roman Emperior Nero's love for the
beautuful yet treacherous Pcppca crjpts
in web of jealousy and intrigue.
Magnificent barcqus opera
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