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About The daily Nebraskan. ([Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-current | View Entire Issue (Feb. 2, 1983)
Wednesday, February 2, 1983 Daily IMebraskan Old ire to dbtlfties addfcfoin): 'Come oiDfi off 'the dosef The Washington Post reports that Nancy Reagan has 12 closets full of clothes. The article said that sometimes she goes to New York to see the work of designers like Adolfo, but that sometimes they pome to the White House to see her. It said that frequently she calls other women to find out what they are wearing to various events and to talk about clothes. All of this has made me very concerned. 1 think Nancy Reagan is addicted to clothes. This craving for clothes is a serious matter. The true clothes addict has an insatiable need for clothes. Clothes Richard Cohen 1 3 make addicts high, gives them a feeling of importance, en ables them to face a world that they see as cold, hostile; and in this particular case, full of Democrats. There are certain cures for this addiction. As in drug addiction, the trick is not to go cold turkey. This often results in a loss of esteem, the sweats and a tendency to fire campaign managers. Clothes addicts who immediately stop buying and talking about clothes have been known to roll around on the floor, run a high temperature and eventually die. This has happened a number of times and is well-documented in the literature. As a result, Nancy Reagan should come off her clothes habit slowly. She should work her way down from designer models to near-designer models. There are such things. They are called Halston-II or Bill Blass-IV and they are the clothes addict's version of methadone. A couple of months on these clothes and the addict is ready for the next step. This is called by the technical term of Buying-Off-The-Rack. There are clinics for this, much like the ones for narcotic addicts that Mrs. Reagan visits. These clinics go by various names - Bloomingdale's, Saks, Lord & Taylor. TTiey are the private sector's remedy for the clothes addict problem and they liave, in many cases, proved quite successful. In addition, they do alterations. Many people scoff at the clothes-addict syndrome, thinking it is not a real addiction. True, it pales in comparison to alcohol or heroin addiction, but it does have similar effects on the addicted person. The clothes addict becomes totally dependent on clothes, lives her (83.04 percent of them are women) life for them, cuts ethical corners just to wear them, stays too thin so the clothes will look good, borrows jewelry from famous gem houses just to make the clothes look better and is likely to spend hours just going from closet to closet (as many as 12 times), trying to decide what to wear. The addiction is so all-consuming the addict often calls friends and discusses nothing but clothes. The addict attempts to donate clothes to museums, not out of any charitable instinct but because this provides an excuse to buy more clothes. In the most hard-core of cases, she may try to make a statement with her clothes. One addict even wore knickers to a state occasion. Such instances are rare, however. Besides the clinics, there are other programs for the clothes addict. Highly recommended is the Foster Designer Program. This program was established for the addict who needs to be weaned from a particular designer. The designer is replaced by a Foster Designer. The Foster Designer acts like a real designer, walks like a real designer and talks like a real designer, but actually does nothing. In addition, the Foster Designer has two names - like Irving Adolfo. This helps destroy the designer mystique and was frankly copied from similar programs designed to wean drug addicts from their connection. ASUN Bleeds candidates, real mues Tweedle-dee vs. Tweedle-dum. And there is no way anyone can convince me otherwise. The ASUN (Associated Students of the University of Nebraska, for nearly everyone's information) elections are a month away. We are now seeing posters, signs, ads, streamers, balloons, you name it, featuring the two "serious" presidential candidates and all their president ial qualities. Yet we probably won't see any other candidates for president come out of the woodwork before next Wed- r Dave Milo Mumgaard nesday's filing deadline. It's a gross shame because we all deserve better. Or a more precise phrase would be: we all deserve some differences, some imagination, some inspira tion, something. What the Reach and Action candidates offer us is nothing but warmed over "recipes for success," and that's nothing they should be proud of, and certainly nothing we should vote for. In order to win an ASUN election, it has become clear that a few "rules" must be obeyed. One cannot simply walk in off the Union Plaza and expect to have an honest chance at competing, much less winning an election. Even if people indicate they're interested in running for president, the past two years' experience has shown that they immediately will receive a great deal of interest, resulting in the offer of a senate seat or even a chance to run as a vice presidential candidate (there are a lot of those, you know). The axiom has become: the less competition, the bet ter. The better for whom? Certainly not the student, who is confronted with the choice between candidates preach ing "non-issues." For instance, both the Action and Reach candidates are "working for"'-and "supporting" a new City Union bookstore. Alas, this inevitability will simply make more room for sales of Windbreakers and T-shirts, not for the sale of lower -cost books. The candidates should make this an issue by acting to find different sources of funding for the bookstore, such as a cooperative bookstore, in which students would directly benefit by spending less for books. But inspiration is lacking in our present candidates, as continued support for the "ASUN newsletter" and greater representation by having "continued regular office hours" seems to be the extent of their imagina tion. Yet these candidates know how to win here a UNL. There seems to be a covert desire to limit how many people will want to vote. Mark my words, both candidates and parties will preach that' they are "broad-based" and "represent the entire student body." In what sense? Watch closely, and you will see that both parties will closely follow the axiom that their candidates for senate, etc., must, as a group be at least 50 percent Greek and 50 percent other. This is certainly "broad-based," as every one should know approximately 15 percent of the stu dent body is Greek. Yet the parties have further problems: no philosophi cal base and no organizational structure that would help the senate act after the elections. What this has led to, and will continue to lead to, is a student senate not knowing what to do, not doing anything then bemoaning the fact that it has no "credibility." It's like a beached whale, full of potential but limited by structural lethargy. I am now calling for a massive search through the halls of UNL, to find a presidential candidate before the filing deadline next Wednesday. Certain behind a com puter terminal, a book by Faulkner or a Bunsen burner, stands a person with imagination, fire and a profound desire to see UNL students treated with respect and dig nity. It's very simple. We need a choice, folks. At any rate, no matter which method is used (they both have their adherents; see the Deaver Lectures), it is clear that Mrs. Reagan ought to avail herself of one. Though the cure is painful and requires great self-control, in the end the addict will be able to go to New York with out seeing a designer and can - and there are such examples - actually wear a dress moic than once. One addict even lost interest in interior designers. The first step, though, is self-awareness. The addict must recognize that she is indeed an addict. This is the case with Nancy Reagan. She must come out of the closet -all 12 of them. (c) 1983, The Washington Post Company Editorial Policy ' Unsigned editorials repre sent the policy of the 1983 Daily Nebraskan but do not necessarily reflect the views of the University of Ne braska, its employees or the NU Board of Regents. The Daily Nebraskan's publishers are the regents, who have established a publication board to super vise the daily production of the newspaper. Accord ing to policy set by the regents, the content of the UNL students newspaper lies solely in the hands of its student editors. THANK YOU FOR CARING GIVE BLOOD Aiiii'i K .tti Kit! Cross .,.'"'(."llM'''H,,1lll,l il 'Ifl"'l !'l,)IIHl,l DuaUU J i trie If the music j3 Wed. -Singles Night $2.50 Admits two for the price of one with coupon. 6600 West "O" call 475-4030 dress codeno jeans ALL Brands $8.25carton 2-fcro on all Video Games. (HAFT CAulPOG OSIUffSE 17th & Vine We're Right On Campus V' . i j Fxecutive Dositions are available now to college seniors and Graduates as Pilots or Navigators. Your college degree makes Air Force flight careers a reality. Goal oriented? Qualify for Officer Training School and become an officer in the world's finest flight program. Excellent pay, benefits and prestige. Only a limited number of these special opportunities remain. For more information, call: Cob Wsisrs $Ml h HAVING Everyone who went on the Padre Island Trip last year is invited to attend the reunion. Also, anyone interested in going this year is invited to attend. Bring friends!! Wed., Feb. 2 7:30 pm Nebraska Union V Freshmen & Sophomores: See AFROTC Agra way H. (Ccllsct) 4)