Wednesday, february 151978
daily nebraskan
page 9
fiCrea tKe thresholds of pain
By Pete Mason
, Entertalnmint editor
eye.
HI keep hef'y A noticeable tick begins under m?, right T counter ':See if your stupid paper toweis will clean that
up snorty , . i scream, .
jOmp iri after the guy, who takes the ice tea plunge
and hold him, down; I drive a Sherman tank through a
sporting 'goods store and completely demolish the entire
'ltJRt-iMvtiA oil'teievisiorf have riiCgage of vacanted beaiities begin giggling about
beenmadesince television ncept on., ; , i deodorant! as if there Were i mn pointed tottei? heads.
uaims nayen wen, maaetnat impressionable ,c - supply of pocket .fishermen. V, .1 '
and adults' can be motivatet! trf nnal ertt J.iI ...LuAi!. f,-' . '-."' . ' ' : ''
-- --y-.r..T---'---t-rrmm"r9yAMVM'iy' uujiw ui a luicigu iiuici uiscuver nine ions 01 luuei .f ' .-Tj-----, t
by watching t90.mucheleyision. . . paper in their bathroom. A lump begins to form in my And finally, T blow up the Rec Room Shop-480
i uwi . wivw auuui sc aim violence, oui 1 Know oi ; tnroat. v
one television staple that drives me to all kinds of deviant
behavior, or at least thoughts of It. "
television. -
foviov;
consecutive times I .
JoAnhe Worley opens her closet and. voila. 800oxes : Slowly return to consciousness.' I'm wringing wet.
of tissue paper,' one for eveiy room in the world 1 My My. clothes are disheveled My throat, is dry and my
heart begins to pound. ; ; yVi head ilcesl.feelJikd I've just taken on the entire Boston
Some moron buys a shirt from a woman for $50 and ffj Bruin hockey team-without pads. .
rips it in half! A knot forms in my stomach. My breathtag :;?: myself 1 pull the plug out
rate increases. ,' , s' : .v-' of the television set and roll it into the closet. I vow never,
I'm talking about commercials.
Via 4 n ft r-4Uf t rA 4. -1 .ii .1! , ' jnQUUlS.
For a while we were treated to some real classic! The '7: !5 Schick jhape. ; Oii.my face!
Volkswagen-ads were entertaining and diverting. So were
. Anoiner ciown talis lor the Imperial taste test. I clutch .tto see it again.- ' v "
the arms of my chair and my knuckles turn white; . But things have & way bf evening out. After about 24 '
-',,'"'"-,''' " 5 ' ,r ' -r--; . hours I begin suffering withdrawal. -rrtv', " ' 'f .
" 'frakka comes on and hustles his golderi oldies. My eyes ?What'$ a little aggraVationr. I ask myself, can take -
begintowater. - . . ' y.-y, ;'ii;.Jt.w;;fcv'"lsfr .---" J v: ;
f 1 begin to feel the blows more acutely as the assault ; ;-: Inen I foil the TV back out of the closet; Some of us
will go through anything for a Leave it to Beaver rerun.
"You asked Jot it, you got it. Ch my stomach!
"Have it your way c what hypocrisy!
the Aika seltzer commercials. Everyone began. to get on,.,---- vZ. . " i JW JL; ' : -
the "make -.fern: laugh'V bandwgon a&t mW
commercial.Viewing at least bearable. 1 ".- ?2eLr, n Ls i &
... i5 , v, "Hop, plop, fizz, fi22.Mi Oh, what nightmare this isl-:-
Sales fires;"however. began to indicate th
- . yuu Kiiuw. jus i wnsn mey Eei your aeienses aown. wnen; -'
ihe advertisers huddled together in .mkmAX TTf
rooms. "No more Mr; Nice Guy. Take off the kids gloves. v-.ffiPA?" r?i. , ' s f
Get 'em where.they live, they said, stifling their laughter , ... ; W ow,5m ! J . - v " . , ; ;frV'
S mv K.S2 22 w r 'b ? of strangling Mr: Whipple and stomping on his entire dis-' ?
f ft!.? t0 Contr? mys?P' :h l Wck Ronald McDonald in the shins and set fire to his 'I
Um&into 7 , " ' Pur Ballons of evil-smelling liquid aU over Rosie;
MTi Whipple tells. two. birdbrams to stop Squeezing the;
toilet paper. I begin to feel sweat beading on my fore-
head.;.-- . . ,f t'':
A man looks at the camera arid says, "My wife 1 think '
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1 QHd ''ij
t Mr1 'i'
A PuWc Service d this Newsoaoer
President Jimmy Carter signed up 51 times.. - ' Bnuvr...a.iiavuunLii
l BERGMAN" A. !bJuh "
Jz CASABLANCA - jU J
JS A STORY OF LOVE g! Vt' fr'' ; i v
1 AND INTRIGUE, S ' e r'r "
o 5:30,7:30,9:30 1? C '.-r
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BRASS liflll I I f
U&bI .' , - M Rated Hit: . ; b
II t k f.r. " f Joninuou fr era ll rft.'
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NOURISH THE BEAST
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STAftF
OUTRAGEOUS
COMEDY
rX FEB.
" 91.96
STUDIO THEATRE
Tickets $3 & $4 -
12th&K
472-2073
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