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T minus eight days and counting.
Eight days of classes. That's all that's left in the
semester schedule before Finals Week. Eight days. That's
192 hours, more or less. 11,520 minutes.
The subject of this column is how to most effectively,
waste those minutes.
Don't kid yourself by thinking that they will be spent
studying and writing papers. First of all, you can knock
warp nine
off at least one-third of them for sleeping time, so the
number is reduced right away to 7.6S0. And at least
another 500 minutes will be spent during meals.
So if you're at a loss figuring out what to do with the
remaining 7,180 minutes, read on. First let's set some
ground rules: : ,
Putting things off
- Rule lrDon't do anything today that can be put off
until tomorrow,-,
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Rule 2: Any form of activity is preferable to construct
ive activity. -
Rule 3 : Vasted time is more rewarding when spent by
groups of two or more persons, fci other worlds, dont go
at it alone. Recruit others and waste their time as well.
A necessary footnote to these rules is Crammer's Law: :
Studying intensity is proportional to the square of the
amount of wasted time that precedes studying. Example:'
a person who wastes two hours will later have to study
four times as hard. And so on. :
One more thing. A distinction needs to be made at this
point between procrastinators and bona fide time wasters.
Time wasters don't just put things off until later. They
creatively till the time with useless activity. There is a r
difference.
Now for the particulars. It: is suggested that time
wasters, in order to increase efficiency, keep track of
wasted minutes and record them on a tally sheet. Astop-.
watch can be a big help here. "
, Ways to waste time '
1) Sleep more. This is such an obvious method of wast
ing time that it shouldn't have to be mentioned. Minutes
count as wasted time only if they're overslept. Going to
. bed early in the evening is an extreme form of efficient
time use and should be avoided at all costs. Go to a party
instead. Now if you sleep an average of 12 hours a day,
you're left, with only 5,760 minutes. That's a consider
able head start. :
2) .Extend mealtimes with an extra cup of coffee. If
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you drink slowly enough, that takes care of another 360
minutes. The drawback is that it'll be harder to get to
sleep at night. But that time can easily be wasted by
tossing and turning, if it is done well.
: 3) A challenging way to waste time is to play two or
more games of pihball every day. You're wasting quarters
as weU, so count those. Even if a person is a consistent
loser 300 minutes can be totally wasted this way.
; 4) Read the Rag every day. Don't forget the Personals
,column in the Want Ads. That takes care of another 105
., minutes. '
5) Try to place a couple of calls each day through the
University Centrex system The wasted time gained by
doing this is truly calculable.
6) Talk to your roommate, whom you haven't seen for
three weeks. Chalk, "up another 500 minutes for this.
7) Sit on the edge of Broyhill Fountain in the Union
Mall and wait for the Physical Plant to turn the water on.
If you spend two hours each day at this perfectly mean
ingless activity, that gives you another 960 minutes. A big
chunk. -
. 8) Spend another hour each day in the South Crib
listening to the tasteless music that's pumped out of the
juke box. This one is for fully conditioned time wasters
only. . ' y
That should do for a start. I heartily recommend them
all. But even if you follow all the above suggestions,
you're still left with 3,000 minutes - minutes that could
be well spent if you don't watch it. So start counting.
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