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About The daily Nebraskan. ([Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-current | View Entire Issue (March 10, 1976)
Wednesday, march 10, 1973
Brothers tells wives all
except how to tell husband
fdph by ron wheeler
00 you u7D7cu
OOIjOIO TRUE fife t&M
THOSE flXE DtFllOirELY
aws urn urns urns
m headli6HTs wo...
mm full fmws
J. AJV Z I i
I was amused to see Gore Vidal's latest book described
as part of a "patriotic trilogy." Vidal is not an American
patriot so I wonder what country his works are supposed
Vidal is a radical who makes a lot of money and has
gained much fame because he is "cute." His novels have
gone consistently downhill (including Burr) but the liberal
media idolizes htm, and his lack of real talent is over
looked. Vidal is overrated. The "pretty boy" is a tainted
Obsession with normalcy
Once again we have "professionals" (Marc and Brenda
Feigen-Fasteau) telling people how to be "normal." Why
won't they all just let us alone? . Why the gross over
emphasis on male-female relations?
I think the obsission with "normalcy" and revolution
in sex has been the cause of more problems, not more
solutions. I think, deep down, that everyone feels the way
I do. Stop all the sex studies and start natural living.
Back to the wholesome basics.
By Arthur Hoppe , , , vgm
Dear Dr. Joyce Brothers: Boy, am I ever glad you
turned 48 and changed your mind about us taiKwives
over 40 having affairs. You're certainly right that an af
fair is the solution to "a dull marriage." Mine sure solved
But your advice did cause a few problems. The first
was how to tell my husband, Fred.
You see, I read about your new book, "Better than
Ever," in Newsweek. I liked the part where you said
having an affair would "add a lot to a marriage. That extra
sparkle in a woman's eye, that little bounce in her walk,
those newly sensuous gestures as she brushes her hair back
from her face or shrugs a shoulder, are all tremendous
sexual come-ons.Her husband can't help but be intrigued.
So true. But the part I liked best is where you said hus
bands over 40 shouldn't have affairs because they mht
have a heart attack. That was the part I didn't know how
to tell Fred.
Temptation in path
I mean I couJ?'t tell him, " Fred, Dr. Brothers says
you shouldn't have an affair because you would find
another woman so exciting you'd probably drop dead."
That would be just putting temptation in his path.
'What a way to go!" he'd say. And, besides, how would
that make me look to him? Duller than ever.
So I decided to tell Fred nothing at all. Let him kill
himself for all I care, the dirty two-timing rat!
My next problem was whom to have an affair with.
Seeing 1 was having it for Fred's sake, I thought I'd have it
with his best friend, Harry.
"Please pass the tartar sauce, Harry," I whispered to
him at our very next dinner party, "and would you like to
have an affair?"
We met the next day at noon in the Bide-an-Hour
Dispatch: one-sided coin
Well, I have noticed that the socialist newspaper of
Lincoln, the Dispatch, has folded. . .and it's about time. I
wondered how long the people of our community would
stand for such one-sided journalistic endeavors. I imagine
the Gazette is not far behind.
In this day and age it is virtually impossible to just
present a single, solitary biased view of life and life's
people and get away with it. The Dispatch wasn't too Bad
an idea at first, but it just went too far in one, narrow
direction. A far left and far-out direction. Yes, the road
to hell is paved with good intentions. The Dispatch was
good intentions gone astray. Rest in peace, and I wish the
wake had been sooner. No more one-sided coins.
Abolish Yell Squad '
I think I have a sensible solution to the Yell Squad
controversy. Why don't we abolish the Yell Squad?
No one pays any attention to the Yell Squad at athletic
events. No one can even hear the Yell Squad when it
really counts. No one thinks that the best people are
necessarily chosen for Yell Squad membership..
Just think of all the disappointing tears that would be
saved by all the crying girls who aren't selected if we
didn't have a Yell Squad. The Yell Squad makes as much
sense as Homecoming Royalty. Exactly none!
Motel. And were you ever right, Dr. Brothers! At 12:14
Harry dropped dead. Did 1 mention he was married?
American Party full of it
Birch Society bullfeathers
By Dzl Gtistafson :.V,':';
Monday night, Tom Anderson, national chairman of
the American Party, addressed an Omaha gathering of the
party faithfuL The American Party, in case you don't
remember, was the political vehicle of George Wallace
in his. 1968 third-party campaign. With Wallace out in
1972, John Birchers took over the party apparatus and
proceeded to run one of their own, John Schmitz, for
president that year. ,
The American Party became, as all organizations do
that come into intimate contact with the John Birch
Society, a showcase for the exhibition of the Bircher's
inexhaustible supply of kookiness. The Party fixed its
steadfast gaze upon the. three evils besetting America:
Communism, rich people, and fluoridated water (or cxecp-i-3
ds&talian); fortunately, the nation's gaze was
Now the Anglican Party is gearing up for another pres-
and while the Eirchizn is watered
Czrra, it still is there. One feels its presence in the
rhetoric To the true Bircher, no non-believer is ever in
nocently ' wrong or even stupid; his error is always a con
sdsus titcrpt to do evil.
Costive cf this first principle of Eirchhm was the
opening tirade delivered by the youthful chairman of the
meeting. Not content to label busing, as I believe it to be,
a disastrous and mistaken policy, it became to the speaker
the; subversive weapon of those "nine traitors on the Su
National chairman Anderson followed with periodic
attacks upon the honesty and patriotism of most of our
Arthur Burns, chairman of the Federal Reserve, knows
his monetary policies will lead to a crash, Anderson says,
but Bums will not chants course. He wants to be on top
after the crash. All of the Democratic presidential can-"'
tiidates except Wallace would "sell us down the river if
elected. And as frosting on the cake, Anderson expressed
his opinion that BUI Buckley is only a phony conservative
he actually is a rich, fzzX socialite.
It aS is the sort of drivel that one became accustomed
to in the 6Qs when the adolescents of the New Left de
nounced anyone to the right of Jerry Rubin as a fascist.
Such rhetorical tcUUcm becomes quite tiresome after a
short time to all but the most fanatic disciples and, like
the old soldier, just fades away. While the Birchers are in
control, fading away is the course of the American Party.
You may find fault with me for picking a married man
But, after all, how many unmarried men over 40 do Fred
and I know? I mean who would be interested.
But poor old Harry, I'm glad to say, did not die in vain.
The very fact that he found me that exciting, gave me a
new feeling of confidence, a new sense of my own allure.
Overnight, I was a new woman.
And, just as you so accurately predicted, Fred couldn't
help but be intrigued. It wasn't two evenings later, as we
were getting ready for bed, that he took my hand in his
and said softly:
Dearest, that extra sparkle in your eye, that little
bounce in your walk, those newly sensuous gestures as
you brush the hair back from your face or shrug a
shoulder, are all the most tremendous sexual come-ons
I've ever seen. Let me take you in my arms and...
And,with that, he clutched his chest and over he
(Copyright Chronicle Pubt&ting Co. 107CI
The Dally Nebis2a welcomes tetters to the
editor and guest opinions. Ckclces cf, materia!
frMhffd wQ be bsssd oa timeliness and
criincIry. Letters must te accompanied by the
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Guest opinions shcu!J te typed, triple-spaced,
ca ccnernsolh; peper. They should be accompanied
by the asthcr's erne, decs stutdi: and major, or
occcpstiox A3 rnctericl submitted to these pages
is subject to es3 and cendescstisa, snd cannot
be returned to the writer.
A garbage can for everyone
In response to Jim Zalewskf s article concerning the
farewell to the Coliseum, I do not think the old barn is a
"snake pit" for any opposing teams. I think it is a garbage
can for everyone. -: ;.'
Instead of having fires on fraternity row, I suggest that
the frat houses put a torch to the Coliseum at the end of
the season. The Coliseum is an eyesore and never should
have been allowed to remain standing this long. "
The new complex will be a breath of fresh air
compared to the dungeon that the roundbaHers have to
play in now. I recommend that the Coliseum be razed and
a new Men's Physical Education Bldg. and high-rise
parking garage be put in its place. A garbage can is only
worth one thing. . .garbage. One; Coliseum in-Rome is
ASUN Senate's childish squabble
Instead of doing what they were elected to do, the
ASUN Senate is having a childish squablble over the free
speech of CSL.
I suggest that ASUN keep its own house in order and
stop trying to demonstrate powers that it doesn't have.
I am beginning to think that ASUN does not know
how to do an honest day's work. ASUN and CSL are
doing nothing but increasing the amount of juvenile
delinquency with their personality disputes and childish
Corpses in the Yangtze
Erratum: I apologize in making a misinterpretation
(Guest Opinion, March 8) that corpses floating in Yangtze
River cited in Del Gustafson's article are the same as those
in Pearl River floating down to Hong Kong. However to
my knowledge, I know no such incidence that several
thousand dead bodies were discovered in the Yangtze
River. It will be helpful if Gustafscn could substantiate
evidence for his remark.
.Del Gustafson, in writing about the "China Myth,"
(Daily Nebraskan, March 3) has made the mistake of judg
ing a totally different society according to the traditional
American values. Here in Americawhere most people
have their basic needs and wants satisfied, the less
materialistic things like freedom and diversity of life seem
important. It is doubtful if a mother who has seen her
children starved to death will have the same priorities.
Mao's revolution was a success cot because "the sight of
a few thousand ancestor-worshippers, black marketeers
and various other social misfits floating dead down the
Yangtze" terrorized the Chinese, but because he promised
and provided his people with what they needed most
food, shelter and clothing. Most people who claim to.
cherish their freedom mere than anything else probably
have never experienced starvation. Freedom has a taste
only on a fu3 stomach.
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