edibrio
,
"SO.)! JfeiifaS
ASUN court works;
RHA should follow
Only a short time ago, student courts on this campus were a
bigger laughingstock than the organizations they served. These
little used appendages of campus justice were lucky (or unlucky) if
they dealt with more than one case a year. Even the most
dedicated trivia freak would be hardpressed to name the chief
justice of the ASUN Student Court.
But this year things have been different. No longer deserving thei
pseudo-kangaroo court label of previous semesters, the ASUN
Student Court has made the leap to respectability in dealing with,
most of this year's campus controversies and appears to be fast
approaching the day when it may actually have a backlog of cases.!
The name Don Armbruster, chief justice of the ASUN Student
Court, has at least become recognizable even if it is not yet
universally spoken with the quiet reverence usually accorded a
judge. "
The ASUN Student Court's work began this year with the Gary
Brantz Homecoming Queen case. The court decided for Brantz. Its
most recent case grew out of last month's ASUN elections when il
was asked to decide if the Pro-Apathy and Amurica parties actually
existed. The court decided they did not.
Last week it appeared for a time that the ASUN court would be
asked to wash out RHA's dirty laundry, also. RHA members
Thursday night refused to appoint a chiefjustice so that the RHA
Court could, as specified in the RHA Constitution, deal with the
Ray WaldenKathy Whittaker election appeal. But whether it wants
to or not, RHA should elect a chiefjustice, and deal with the!
complaint so the new RHA administration can get on with the
business of living up to the promises it made during the
vacation-shortened campaign.
Granted, the WaldenWhittaker appeal over the lost hour of
voting time is hardly the most exciting case in the history of
American jurisprudence if the polls were. closed one hour ir
Cather-Pound-Neihardt to Walden supporters, Ihne supporters
presumably were also turned away-but a start has to be made
somewhere, and running to ASUN when a problem arises is hard!)
the solution.
WesAlberi
Help them sock it to you
"Good morning, sir." said
man at tne aoor. i
the well-dressed
young man at me.uoor. i i-j
friendly Genghis Khan Gas iigni company.
"I'm sure I paid my bill," I said nervously.
"Please don't cut me off. I've got a T-bone steak
in the freezer I'm saving for the Bicentennial.
"You don't understand, sir," he said. "I'm a
sales representative. You see, we're conducting a
modest $2 million sales campaign."
"But I already buy your gas and lights," I
said, "not having much choice in the matter."
"We appreciate that," he said with a little
smile. "But we're not selling gas and lights. We're
selling advertising."
"But I don't need advertising," I said.
"I realize that," he said. "Bufwe do."
"You mean," I asked incredulously, "that you
want me to buy advertising from you for you?"
"Actually, you've been doing it for years," he
said. "We simply included the charge in your
monthly bill. But we felt going door-to-door
would be more fair."
"You've got a point there," I said.
He opened his briefcase. "Now, how would
you like to purchase this beautifully-illustrated
pamphlet on gas clothes driers for only 50 cents,;
which barely covers our production costs? It's
quite a bargain."
"Is it like those billboards I used to pay for
telling me to 'Buy a Gas Drier for a Rainy Day'?"
"No," he said, "this is called 'Having Fun in
the Great Outdoors.' It's about the joys and
healthy exercise of hanging clothes on a
clothesline."
"You want me to buy advertising from you to
convince me to use. less of your product?" I
asked. "That doesn't sound like the American
way."
"Don't you know there's an energy crisis on,
Mac?" he said sternly.
"I forgot," I said apologetically. "Sell me a
pamphlet telling me how much my rates will go
down if I buy less. I need to be encouraged to do
my duty."
"I don't have one," he said. "Actually, if you
buy less, your rates will go up. But if you buy
scads, we can let you have it wholesale. That's
the American way."
"I guess you're right," I said humbly.
orthur hoppe
innocen
Qf
"But what you desperately need," he said, "is
this handsome booklet for only $2.99. Observe
the portrait of our symbol, Randy Acey-Deecy,
on the cover, Note his gaunt cheeks, tattered
uniform. . ."
"What's the message?" I asked suspiciously.
"It will convince you immediately," he said,
"how urgently your friendly Gas & Light
Company requires a $1.2 billion rate increase."
"You mean you want me to pay you to
convince me I should pay you more for your
product?" I demanded angrily.
"Gosh," he said, "you've been doing it for
years."
Well! Needless to say, I slammed the door in
his face. How stupid does the Gas & Light
Company think I am?
By the way, would anyone care to buy a
T-bone steak? (Low down payment, E-Z terms.)
This offer expires in 48 hours or 24 if we get a
warm spell.
(Copyright Chrortida Publishing Co. 1975)
3S33
WHAT TW... !
WELL ru.BE.
HHHS25
AT LEAST I WON'T
GET PIMPLES OH
MY TEETH, ACU
I If I
Viet bloodbath better than years of casualties
For the first time in the history of the Vietnam
war we are finally hearing some good news-the
Communists are undeniably winning. It's about time,
Let's face it Even the most naive idealist knew in
his troubled sleep that the Paris Peace Accord would
not last. Given the history of Indochina, Communist
ideology and the dictatorial stupidity of the Thieu
regime, Kissinger's peace pact and the following
Nobel Peace Prize was a joke.
Hie fact that we were embroiling ourselves in
someone else's civil war was obvious to most of the
world except the American government.
The two halves of Vietnam never represented
different peoples with different identities. Despite the
fact that Hanoi committed itself deeply to the1
support and later direction of the conflict in the"
South didn't change the observation that the fighting
was still between Vietnamese. It was only a question
of deciding what group of Vietnamese would govern.
The Pentagon Papers underscored this by the
statement that "from later interrogations of captured
infiltrators United States intelligence officers learned
that until 1964, almost all the infiltrators were native
Southerners who went to the North in 1954."
Korea should have taught the U.S. that in
Communist containment, it is important to avoid a
protracted land war in the Asian world.
Korea should have taught us the dangers involved
in alienating allies, the overtones of racism,
imperialism and the impossibility of achieving
anything but a dubiour ictory in guerrilla warfare.
Today, it is the inability to win in Vietnam that
most bothers Americans. We like to be winners and it
irritates us that our football team isn't number one,
page 4
that our economy refuses to straighten up, that the
Arabs won't kowtow to us and that
country like North Vietnam can shame us. It hurts
our American ego.
Related to this is the persistent, irritable question
was it all in vain? The answer has to be a reluctant
and tragic yes.
Vietnam was a mistake. The slow, sorrowful leaves
of history reveal to us millions of men who, fighting
for one cause or another, have died in vain. This time
it happened to be U.S. soldiers.
bruce nelson
Unfortunately, Amen cans aren't going to accept
this and they'll look for scapegoats. President Ford
has found his in Congress but I suggest, if you need
one, look to the Pentagon Papers.
In those ghastly documents in March of 1965
Assistant Secretary of Defense John McNaughton
quite frankly defined the U.S. aims in Vietnam as- "70
per cent to avoid humiliating defeat, 20 per cent to
keep Vietnam out of Chinese hands and 10 per cent
to permit the people of South Vietnam to enjoy a
better, freer way of life."
Some are distressed at possible repercussions on
our allies and our world prestige.
Hans Morgenthau has written that "the prestige of
a nation is not to be determined by the success or
daily nebraskan
failure of a particular operation at a particular
moment in history. The pages of history record many
examples of nations which secure in their possession of
great power. . . .have suffered defeat or retreated
from exposed positions without suffering a lose in
prestige,"
Unfortunately, the U.S. in its foolishness has tried
to persuade the world that the failure of this
particular operation in Vietnam is the do-or-die stand
against communism. The fact that only Australia,
New Zealand and South Korea helped us in Vietnam
shows how unconvincing we were.
Instead, our prestige dropped steadily during the '
war. Wisdom, a close relative of prestige, dictates that
when one is faced with an impossible situation, one
should back off.
Even George F. Will, a conservative columnist for
National Review, wrote dismally last week that "The
U.S. government tried to speak (the language of
force) for a decade. and couldn't get its message
across. And now the government wants a 793rd
chance to tidy things up in Asia."
Those who fear a Communist bloodbath in the
Soutii can only hope that it will be a modest one.
From a purely numerical standpoint, one bloodbath
is less tragic than endless years of casualties.
Other than the initial terror, most of the
Vietnamese probably will benefit from Communist
rule. They haven't had freedoms of speech and press
under TUeu, so those won't be missed under
Communism.
Indeed, at least under Communism the people
won't starve, which is something of which capitalism
cannot boast.
. monday, april 7, 1975