o o)S $sk n s ,a nja i fp re u u y 1 Student Council passed the pro rosed "policy of limiting scholar ship and classroom activity" Wednesday by a vote of 14 to 134. The meeting was held in the University Stadium so that inter ested students might hear the de bate. Council members who were jn favor of the program passed candy kisses and jaw breakers. Those who opposed the contro versy had hired a band from Omaha that played "Don't Take Away Our Books," an original song by William Kalamazoo. The new policy for the limita tion of scholarship and classroom activity is entitled the Policy to Prevent College Students From Be ing Fatigued, Neurotic and Just Too Tuckered Out. Jack Rogers, president of Stu dent Council, explained that a point system would be used. Each individual is allowed to have three points. A person receives one point for getting a 9 or 8 in a course. If he gets three 8's, the rest of his grades must be for feited. The grade of 6 and 7 are equal to one-half point each, with a 5 and 4 rating one-quarter point each. There are no points for grades below 4. Class Attendance Besides grades, an individual re ceives a point if he attends class three-fourths of the time. feel, Gail Katskee, secretary, said, "that if one attends class with any regularity, one is doing much more work and spending much more time than a person who does not, therefore he should get a point." Rogers pointed out that this campus is becoming an academic institution with a few persons com pletely dominating the field. He added that thePolicy To Prevent C2 c 1 ?) 1 1 1 1 1 d) Lm r U ws Men Start FiQht I ; - -i"-""" ' aiiiJMu...ii.i.niu..uii)iiuu, luiinn llluu , i " at'- m.m - t .... -vn- v 1.1 1 - i . . -. . - i,jx-i...,,. . s . t War n OjyiTDSirDes Almost total war has broken out wreaking havoc by the bushel. It's Spring, Boys! Present theories of curbing riot us living at the University include the doctrine of "keep 'em busy, ftft'em tired and wet'em down." Wii &is in nund, the men above are instituting the ideal psycho logical cure for Spring fever. They are chopping wood, which w31 pro vide kindling, which will build big fires, which will cook good pan cakes, which will fill everybody's tummies, which will make every one bappy, which will stop riots, which win help THE SPRING AC TIVITY, '(which is still secret), which wCl keep water where it is supposed to be ali over everybody. Pictured above are three unidenti fied students keeping themselves busy, and also very tired, before they get themselves wetted down. During vacation everything will be lazy and easy, and they will re turn to the campus next week ready to settle down to "some good hard study" if, if, if If they keep ad vice such as was offered Thursday morning. The advice: "In the Spring everything comes to life among the fraternities on the Uni versity campus, according to re ports from emergency IFC head quarters on the third floor of Ellen Smith Hall. In a note scribbled on a sheet of foolscap and attached to a vag rant passenger pigeon, IFC Prexy Bill Devries reported that "1 o n g standing rivalry between various interest groups in the fraternity system has finally flared into full flame, resulting in the armed camps and bitter skirmishes that are occurring even now in the bat tle zones stretching from 16th and to the Animal Husbandry Build ing "Timid Tom" Wayward. Sigma Nu president, regretted the "need less slaughter of thousands" but felt the war was a good thing. "It will take the place of the harmful spring riots," he said. Republic Almost Licked Perhaps the biggest campaign of the war was the massive attack of the United Houses of R Street on the Sixteenth Street People's Republic. The Sixteenth Streeters, hampered by the loss of the Sig mas, at last reports were weak ening, but have sent for reinforce ments from Delta Upsilon and Del ta Sigma Phi. Acacia and Theta Chi have re- College Students From Being Fa tigued, Neurotic and Just Too Tuckered Out helps to spread things around. The persons opposed to the poli cy stated that it was up to the in dividual if he wanted to become fatigued, neurotic and just too tuckered out. Marvin Stromer, president of the Pure-In-Heart So ciety, said that he knew many happy students with an 8.5 aver age. "Just think of that exquisite precious moment when you peer over the top of your 'History of the Llama' to look at the clock," Stromer said. Red Ink "If a person does not study until late in the night he will never ap preciate this fragile moment," Stromer continued. "Too many times a person just stares at a clock, does nothing else but stare, then this act becomes common and vulger," he said. Stromer then whipped out a book by Edna St. South West and be gan to quote long passages under lined in red ink. Rogers thumbed quickly through his Roberts' Rules of Order to find out what to do when some one begins to quote long passages underlined in red ink from a poet ry book by Edna St. South West. While Rogers slapped through the table of contents, a member who was in the opposition group quietly gave Stromer a rabbit punch. He slunk unobtrusively un der the table and was not heard from again during the meeting. SC Approves Limit On Animal The Student Council voted Wed nesday to limit the number of ac tivities in which each animal in the University can participate. The new policy which goes into effect immediately will limit each animal to a one year term as president of the respective animal clubs, such as the U.A.A (United Angus Association).- Under the provisions an animal may serve as a board member of only two animal groups such as the United Dairy Cows and the Brown Swiss Boosters. The new policy will affect the cattle, hogs, and sheep in animal husbandry, dairy animals in the dairy department and chickens and turkeys in the poultry department. The Council passed by unanimous vote an amendment to not include worms or any of the bird species because the group felt that these animals were not under the direct supervision of the University. The Block and Bridle Spring Show will be affected to some ex tent by the new policy. The Coun cil's action will forbid any animal from entering the show more than twice and winning grand champion more than once. Under the provisions of the new action each University hen may Latest reports from the battle portedly thrown in with the R Street zones show four distinct campaigns j an- Kappa Sigs have been emerging from the over-all war. keeping neutral, as they have been too Dusy sieaiing ouucung mater ials from FarmHouse and AGR. Over the sounds of hand-to-hand Counterattack Alpha Gamma Rho, FarmHouse and Alpha Gamma Sigma started the fighting when a mixed band Look at lilacs outside. Now you go ' of marauders of AGR's and AGS's were beaten back almost to the Ag on home, and come to life. But a certain point and then watch yourself. Bloom, but don't blos som. " Innocents Questioned nre-rarers uui Moral Virtue O investigates Men's Group A3 investigation is being launched concerning the innocence of the In nocents Society, an organization for server males who major in ballet lancL-ig and pencil pushing. The investigation is being coo txzed by the Wednesday After oooti F ire-Eaters club, formerly k-xwn as the World Order of Table Tappers. The Fire-Eaters recently Int been delving into the consti tjtms of less ambitious groups on tbe campus to ascertain the faH nre or success of the groups to tH.2 their obligations. The Fire-Eaters found several liscrepencies in the institution the innocent Innocents. When the group was first organized at the University in 1857, several pro nriTj were placed tn the consti txnja which are sot being carried First, all Innocents were required to u-iher their equine means of Womobm to m special hitching ck to be kept in perfect order ty the Society. The Fire-Eaters UfizA that the Innocents did not fail to maintain the bitching rack in perfect order, but they faJad to maintain the bitching rack b press interviews that their ideals had been crushed and disillusioned. The first indictment of the In nocents was clouded later in the day when the Fire-Eaters presi dent and chairman of all investi gations, who has been incognito fighting at the corner of 16th and R can be heard the sound of buzz bombs directed from the SAM house toward the ZBT's. Declin ing to take part in the all-out R Staff Worried uation expressed a variety of opin ions. One girl who was pinned to an Innocent threw bis pin on the floor, declaring that she was throueh with "that four-flushiru? wolf in ballet pracice leotard." i over 8n argument arising from an "The effects of this discovery anonymous charge of cheating m since the reorganization of Use ! mm be far reaching," Percy Par-1 - s group, discovered that the prime j liamentary, chairman of pencil Sigma Row Raw prerequisite for membership in the j sharpeners and an Innocent, said. J On city campus, fighting has be society was an outward and con- "Fences are made of wood, which j come more bitter. The Sigma Row stant exhibition of innocence and is a solid substance, Percy! Sigma Phi EpsOon, Sigma Nu moral virtue. I Pavlovivitch, chief instructor at I and Sigma Alpha Epsflon has Wiointr his eves and blowing bis j bar practice, ballet and otherwise, t broken out in white-hot intensity. nose, the Fire-Eaters leader turned j said. j Heavy mortar fire from the Sig to his henchmen crying out against Pavlovivitch, an Innocent and , Ep house to the SAE's has reduced ballet major, has gained a campus ; the Sigma Nu house to mere rub reputation for being noncommital. j bie. However, he was reported to be Rangers from the Sigma Nu rather green as be RTft the meeting ; bouse, sent out from the new Sig and afterwards was passing out : ma Nu command post in the Kappa applications for the French Foreign house, stormed the back of the Legion to his fellow Innocents. iSig Ep house late Thursday night, Activities Building where t b, e 1 16tn tiff the Sammies and the AGS's split from the AGR's, deal- j Zebes are said to be bent on each ing them a stunning blow in a ; other's total destruction. counter-attack. At the present time, each of the three houses has been laying sup plies and digging trenches in prep aration for a long siege. Farm House is currently concentrating f on an artillery barrage on a re- i mote AGS outpost in a storm sewer off Holdrege Street. Planes oearing AGR markings re cently destroyed a FarmHouse am munition dump, only to be shot down by AGS guns situated on the New House Ag Sorority To ra 5 The first agricultural social so rority in the United States Alpha Falfa will be established on Ag campus, according to Catty Clover, president of the organizing com mittee. Announcement was made after a closed-session gathering of 15 co eds majoring in home economics. Approval for the sorority was cleared through the Senate sub committee on un-University activi- Daily Worker Buys 'Rag' Bemuse Of Sallow Color "a flagrant violation of the coosti tution of Innocents. He suggested that the members the burning question simmer until the morrow. He asked for a mo tion for adjournment, but one mem ber, a former resident of South Carolina, was taking a course in parliamentary procedure and called for the question instead. After 29 minutes of wrangling over parliamentary procedure, the of Rogers Rules of Order irom the campus. The president bad to be trans ported borne by the local ambu- lance unit. He collapsed at tne Insufficient dye has necessitated roof of the Ag Engineering Build- saIe Ra to the ing. 'Daily Worker which felt that its The fighting reportedly broke out heretofore independent ally news paper did not display the proper red hue. Comrade .Jan Harrison Beal ex plained that this move will not re quire any change in the policies of the Pink Rag. "I hate to see it go but it was gone anyway," Comrade Beal said. With the exception of Comrade editor, who is now under psychia tric care in Lesser Evil, Siberia, the rest of the Rag staff has been until jobs worthy of the talents and abilities of the staff can be found for 14.758973157V4 cents an hour. Smiling Sam Jensen is consid ering employment sharpening red pencils for Robert Knoll but is presently waiting for confirmation from Cominform of his appoint ment to replace Bulganin. Other staff members, lacking Jensen's superior talents, have been forced to accept more mun dane ' employment. Roger Henkle, ties and through Dean Frank M Hallgren's office. The hidden reason behind the banded efforts for organization was apparently to proclaim not only to Nebraskans, but to the entire country, that while Nebraska is of ficially "the beef state" it is also significantly important in the pro duction of alfalfa. Press releases were sent to the President of the United States and to the USSR (Union of Spinach growers, Skirt-sowers and Rye- sewers.) The New York Rymes heralded Alpha Falfa as the "great est advancement of human free doms of the farm-minded female since the mechanical potato peeler." Miss Clover announced that Al pha Falfa will begin April 1 the construction of their arch-domed seven-story penthouse to overlook the Dairy Barns. A clause in the accepted constitution of Alpha Falfa provides that each day a blossoming alfalfa plant 10 feet tall be placed in a two-inch rostrum atop the skyscraping edifice. "It might not seem unusual to note," Miss Clover said, "that all 15 founding members are from either Cozad,' Gothenburg or Val ley." Rumors have been circulating around Ag campus that certain president of General Motors, savs that he hopes that something bet- j factions have been disturbed oyer Men In Hiding? regulation. The decorations committee is planning on decorating the stage with green ivy, Hitberger said. Laughingly be added, "I've put botony majors on the committee this year, so I'm sure there H be no mistaken identity in plants as there was last year." t alL YF.Tjf wririMil tmMKUW ! numtinn tt TlaeCT Rules. of extreme shock and announced j Members commenting on the sit- Annual Ivy Day Sing, Fishfry Committee Announces Date The aanusl Ivy Day Sing and Tawdry will be held July IS, an iwiineed Glen Eitberger, chairman tie Where to Hold the Ivy Day and Fishfry Committee. "This it Use only date we could find that ould not conflict with soraet&ng le." be explained. , K.tberger said that the regula tsrs for the Sing and Fishfry are s follows: all pieces must be by k v n composer such as Handel, Mozart or Dave Barbour; all sing-i-'ig groups must not exceed SO; " pieces must be songs of as LVtic value. This clause was added eliminate songs such as "I Got Tears in My Ears From Crying Lying Down. Realistic props are prohibited. Last year a group used a goat to g-ve atmosphere to their son "Old KacDonald Had a Farm." The goat fs2ed to comply with the regula tion to stay on the platform while performing and wandered through the audience licking bald beads nd munching on small girl's pig tail. The group did not win. The song can not be sung com pletely ia unison, Frank S. Piitear drum, judge, insisted on this one ECinsey To interview NU Male Population The arrival of Dr. Alfred C. Kin-. Eligible Bachelor and the Typi- sey next week to conduct a series CJj Nebraska Male interviews of University men tor his new book, "Behavior of the Coffee Hoar Bill Proposes New Highway To Rcca L.B. 6936 concerning the con struction of a four-lane speedway between Lincoia and Roca-was re ferred Thursday to a committee of the Nebraska Legislature. The bill was Introduced by Charles L. Lushwell, 65, a Univer sity student. Lushwefl said be and his younger contemporaries need the speedway to facilitate the trip to Roc a, one of the state's most traveled roads. The committee at present is in vestigating the reason for the nu merals Sunday afternoon expedi tions to Roca. Committee mem bers have beard of no cultural ad vantages which would attract students. Lushwell is fighting for his bill, Stidenu who go to classes via Thursday be was reported to have su-am lowers will meet during j been handing out free beer to win vacaiion for an informal coffee votes. He staggered up and down ''T m the Love Library fourth ! the aisles of the legislative cham "r, Marvin Bre&low, speech ! bers yelling "All roads lead to announced. j Roca!" led to the brink of desperation and - ter is in sight or else "I fear the , the recent organization honoring starvation by the loss of their jobs, t end is near." Nebraska s production of alialfa. Angelogamen PreciUuous D a 1 y j Anyone desiring a choice assort-1 A group of male Ag majors are (Frangrant Fred) explained what ment of used cigarette butts can ' proposing the organization of a so this will mean statistically: j get them, for a price, from Kay cial entity known as the Beta Beta pay? i Nosky who has set up business just Beta Beefers. Us here, that's the copyread- nsid e doorway of Ellen Smith ers, ya know, get paid, when Singer nau- many rvuoirs The Pub Board expressed con cern over the plight of the other unfortunates, but said that under the circumstances there was no choice. No mention was made of PasSi imes lay, only two fgg, per day. Any hert laying more than the allotted sunt win be called before a special committee made up of two Stu- jtuTt' the Dean of Student Affairs and officials in the poultry husbandry department. Each University-owned pig, re gartiless of breed, who will ink more than twice at the same I tor, or will root more than two muc puames over a period of 23 hours, 50 minutes, and 59 seconds will have all privileges taken away from him for a week. One Council member who pre ferred not to have his name men tioned said that the odd time was placed on the rooting period ta make the hogs able to part;-; in the old tradition of mal wad dling without endanger--. tek ture in activities. The president of the CosacJ commented that the purpose of tt new activity move was to limit activities of each animal so si tv allow more animals to participsls.1, Some of the animals are befcj,' overloaded in their activities. He added that even though sore animals will lose weight and loss vigor, the weaker members of the family such as the rant ptg" will be able to participate. One Student Council member pu it this way: "There is enough ani mal talent in the various depart meiits at the University to merit such a move." He felt that no ac tivity participated in by any of the animals involved would be limited beyond the extent that the animals, despite the number of ac tivities held, would still be al lowed to breath air. inmates Ml Need ermits Asfflouncement of a new pinning polry has come from Dean of VT;3en Mar jorum Johansen. Any r f planning to get pinned must . 3 for Form Number 70B5643 ; : 'plicate and Blue Form 534 T. T in quadruplicate. : tslotsally these farms ir aT-ibl to EHw ATffisJL."- A3 applicants tonst sko &av a bkxd test and physical ex&ffiiaa tioa at least a week before the pining. Women should report to Stutet Health for these examina tior. Men will be taken cart of personally at Ellen Smith. Tia Dean requested that each ap puct.i be ready to present the fol lows information and identifica tion: last semester's ED card, birth certificate (this, the Dean ex plained, is to prevent phonies), li brary card from the Library of CoKEress. ticket to the last Inter- fraternity Ball, draft card, parole release, an old Ec 11 test ana a statement from any ex-pinmates testifying as to the qualifications of the applicant This is just a matter of routine, Desa Johansen explained, and should not cause any decline in the number of pinnings. As evi dence she fiashed her newly ac quired Beta pin and grinned hap- pi!y- is in a good mood, $35 a month, which buys a lot of beer, and that ain't bay either. Figering we spend 7 hours a day, three days a week, when we is sober, and time and a half for overtime when we gets what's 144 plus 2. . . these big The girls said be was elected j This presents a insermontable, rv,'V!7, v a!p " ha caused consid-! ecsase D wa the onlj male unsirmoutible, in-sermontable. . . . erable feeling among coeds. j enrolled in Teachers College and ! jt big problem. The transfer of Dr. Kinsev. noted zoologist, will was the onlv man thev had ever ! the RaS cannot be completed conduct interviews ta au maie Kea OB carnpus scuaenis ana &u men arc ucu.g lucky and have night news that the 160,000,000,001 rubles they re comes out. . . let me see. . . .jceived for the deal. 7 times 2 is 12 and divide that i In commemoration of the last is by 3 feet and that comes out. ... f sue of the Pink Rag and also in On The Anti-Social Side Spring Stumbles In With 10 Un-Pinnings accord with the spring fashion trends this issue should have been printed with a black border, but Fashion Editor Mitchell held out for chartruese with purple polka dots. required to attend. Several coeds who have been keeping a stiff upper lip commented that the interviews will be the big gest thing to hit the campus in years. The interviews should also prove to be interesting due to the lack of dating on the campus, co eds said. Coeds presented a picture as one of the underlying factors which have caused dating to usappear. They said that the. man was an J 1 AVERAGE MALE r AD the other men were enrolled in Casey's 195, KeUey's 254 and DB and G 302, a graduate. course. No coed has ever entered the sacred portals of these buildings; consequently, no coed has ever seen the University male popula tion, although the Registrar (fe male) swore, to a protest commit tee (female) that some 5000 males were enrolled. The women added that they were eagerly awaiting the arrival of Dr. wjjKinsey. They believe that a por I tion of the males will appear for the interviews, which are being . 1 1 held in Ellen Smith Hall. 4 i The site was selected after ex 1 i tensive lobbying by the AWS Po litical Action Committee (female) before the Student Council (fe male). The Chancellor (f-jn.ale and unmarried) gave her approval in stantly, feeling the coeds should at least be given a fighting chance. The Dean of Student Affairs (fe male) ordered Teachers College closed for the day and said she 1 1 would attend the event in search I s of older graduate students (male) I i and faculty members (male), j j Susan B. Nathony, president of the Male Extermination League and ! campus radical, said her organ- j ization would boycott the inter f ' views. They feel that propagation of the species is not worth the trouble. ' 1 i ' - iS ' - ' ; r-'V t ' Jt s I : " -:':H; "r: V , "-"' t ...jfps lift j . ; " " " ...,.' J I y - I I . - - - 1 " I I v.,,.. -r-. ' Rehabilitation Thrown abruptly out of work by the quick sale of The Pink Rag to the Daily Worker were some 30 odd staff members, few ii whom will be able to fiod po siUons equjtl to their former jobs. Shown above is a Rag dolly, us ing her facile fingertips at a Spinning Jenny row tsM her nital U tri tvprw -d. By SYBIL SLAOUAW Social E4itr (TeL 14C74) The social whirl on the old NU campus reached a fever pitcb last week as everyone went casually ape ever the coming of Spring and the advent of the vernal equinox. The unseasonable warm weather proved no damper to tiwiezi spirits, as there were 23 pinnings,, 14 engagements, six elopements, wedding in the first-floor hall of Burnett at 11 a.m. aod a prnmate beating on the corner of 16th and S Street which brought a large crowd of spectators and three tramplings of freshman English majors. Brawls Everywhere Parties, too, were everywhere, and happy couples could be seen racing across lawns and vaulting hedges as they raced from one gay, mad tea, reception or wienie roast to another. Perhaps the biggest smash on campus was the gaia annual Dear baiting and cole-slaw festival sponsored by NUCWA and AWS. Among the couples attending were Floyd Krmjkw and Edna St. Vincent Mfflay, Dean Johnston and J. Edgar Hoover, Max Shuhnan and Florence Catapult and Maud Mojave and Sam J. N'orgle. Delta Delta Delta, known in intimate circles as Tri-Delt. held their annual John J. Pershing Honorary Tri-Delt Memorial Recognition Dinner Dance and Bop Appreciation Concert in the Mauve Room of the Flatiron Hotel in Omaha Thursdr. ' Seen at the occasion were s whole raft of gaily-bedecked Tri-Delts and General Pershing, who joshingly said even though he had "one foot in the grave," be was glad he could be present. Fhi Phi Phi, national temperance society, held a "Anti-Alcohol Rally" on the steps of the Union Thursday night. Speeches were given by Carrie Nation Susan B. Anthony on "Liquor, Vice of Vices" and "Me and My Hatchet. Nobody came. The Bi-Monthly Ball of the Friday Afternoon Chowder and March ing Society, held at the intersection c.J 13th and R Streets, proved a great success. Among the couples wfco stormed the Library and razed Avery Lab were Sharon Kuntzfa-e.r and Alfred Wombat, Magnolia Jones and R. Black Henkle and Gcr.e Christenson and his clipboard. Last, but not least, was the Gin Flu and Clam Digging celebration given by a group of friends for recently un-incarcerated T. IL Eelf and Igor Gillopsie. ' ' Un-PinninQS Ten un-pinnings were announced ti Thursday evening Qaarrel Cab meetings. Among the broken attachment was that of Flip Kukris and his beloved investigators. H'ttch'mgs Oriole G. Svensen and Ccn Sun.O.;. e were married by proxy. Sam Catchem, groom of .V 'l Fi ' rs, fainted at the altar. , it u c. as ill ta id B. . ro . a. to Rf ( t3 T'