Image provided by: University of Nebraska-Lincoln Libraries, Lincoln, NE
About The daily Nebraskan. ([Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-current | View Entire Issue (March 31, 1938)
t rr. 1 flfl n AILY ASKAN Official Student Newspaper of the University of Nebraska t VOL. XXXVII, NO. 116. LINCOLN, NEItllASKA, I MDKSDAV, MARCH 31, J9:j" MICE FIVE CENTS fiLuai QamjfibsdL L7D n THE 1, I J On 4 1v WHI TE SPOT IN EHONT OF OUK EVES A short, drU, fat, tn II, llght complcxioned, skinny sort of ninn with a questing look iibout Ills face stumbled over the threshold Rml started peering Into corners and under heaps of rubbish Casunlly kicking r cockroach out of our field of vision, we as sumed the part of an innocent !' slander. His pcrfot mnnce was mildly curious for awhile as long as confined his peering and search ing to corners but when he tried to lift up what was sitting: on our chnir, we rose as one man in pro test. Lost! "Whatsabigidea?" we asked, pushing our nose up to his. "What have you lost around here besides your mind?" "I am looking," he saM, his eyes flitting hither and yon, "Tor white spots." "White spots?" queried the party of the second part. "What is this, how dare you and a cou ple of well, I ncvers. You've sure got your nerve coming- into this dust bowl and looking for white spots, Dark spots and specks we have in plenty. I've been seeing dark spots in front of my eyes for the last six months hut I can as sure you that I have failed to no tice any strange looking white spots around mo ncigiworiiooa, "You don't understand..." "Well, perhnps if I asked you some questions whereby you could Identify them better maybe I could be of help. Now these white spots vou arc looking for, would they be pure homozygous white spots? Or would they be sort of brindled due to heterozygous white spot ances try? Would they have tails? Would they have license numbers? Are they recent models or do they have the chasses of white spots of dnys gone by? What Is the dls tinguislung characteristic of a white spot? How might I know if I met one, sny, at an hour dance?" "Well." said the hunter, looking under a desk; "A while spot has no hidden taxes. Earmark. "Now we are getting some where. No hidden taxes you say. Well, well and a couple of hmnmnmns. Anything that has hidden taxes we may throw aside as not being a true white spot, eh?; But if the taxes are hidden, how can you tell if there aren't any for sure when you can't see them?" "Simple. All you have to do is look at the price tag of the while spot when it Is offered to tho pub lic and then go back and see how much, or how little, it cost to produce the white spot." "Rather tricky, what?" "Exceedingly, old bean, effen ynu-nll savvy jest what Oi mean ter sav about these verc 'hidden taxes'." said the stranger in his rich Norwegian accent. Mentally cataloging us an Eng lishman with Scotch blood who bad once vacationed in the Ken tucky hills with an Irish cook who talked Spanish, wo pressed him for further details. "I savvy hidden taxes now, pod rier, but can't you tell nic some more. 7 "Wal, fer one thing, a gude white spot she has got to be cen trallv located." 'Tfooey and a couple of finger- (Continued on rage 2). Kosmet Klub People Away Colossal Musical Hit May Make Back All Expenses Now in its fifth year on 12th street, the Kosmet Klub's 1S34-1!35-193(3-1037-190S super collosal musical hit, "The Six Little Jump ers and How They drew." appears likely to make back original ex penses any month now. Although people are still staying away in droves, the entire first row was filled last night, and all indications poin toa now is the time for all good men zilch sqrx mftg according to Winfield "Doc" Ellas, president of the Klub. Don Boehm and Duke Deger, nightly recipients of fresh fruit r.nd flowers (some still in the potted stage) from their legions of admirers, leave Saturday for Hollywood, necessitating a call for new try-outs, if the show is to continue. The same will be held to morrow morning, beginning at 6 o'clock in booth 42 of the Moon. Anyone from 6 to 60 is eligible, provided they are now carrying 14 Sigma Nu - - t": ' i ..r-H 1 U ..-1 .. .- u "i ,;--v,. '''' "L--wt ' T""- , I r"" .. ,,"- --, . vw ' "" " u . .W'..', ....... STREET CLEANER CHOOSES NIL FOR Cornluiskers Receive First rOfficial Confirmation . Of New Status. "Which university, In your opin ion, Is the white spot of the na tion?" This was asked of Mr. Arthur Moineter, 62 year old street cleanser. Pondering for seven days and seven nights, Momcter came Into our office early this morning with his more or less spontaneous an swer. The sanitation employe was grinning amply. His florid reply was, "Nebraska!" Gives Due Consideration. Moincler seemed to resent, the second question, but he pondered for 14 days and 14 nights with this statement. "I has lived by dut school all me life. The stadium keeps the wind off me house. On Saturdays I kin climb up me tree and Ree der football games free. I'se never bin to no school and me wife ain't, neither. I gotta kid, 22, that gradyates from junior high this spring, but he ain't gonna go there neither, cause I ain't gonna send him. But If 1 ever did send any of my kids or anythin', I'd send 'em to Nebraska." Mometer's is the first confirma tion to the university's claim to the white spot A.W.S. EXTENDS S TO 3:30 A. M. Coeds Oppose New Ruling; Miss Heppner Gives Hearty Approval. Laic (Inters will no longer be forrcd to crawl ignominiously through windows hereafter once the new policy of the A. w. S. board headed by Helen Pascoe, in regard to date nights, goes into effect. On special nights, coeds will be required to get home only before breakfast, while the usual deadline for dates will be either 2 n. ni. or 3:30. Dean Amanda Heppner gave her heartiest approval to the plan, saying, "Against the protests of most of the girls themselves, this (Continued on Page 2). Ponies Keep in Droves hours of interpretive dancing (or a reasonably accurate facsimile), and successfully cribbed through not less than 20 (nor more than 21 ) hours the semester before last Beginning tonight, show-goers (If any) will find an innovation in the consistent monotony of "The Six Little J's and How They Grew." Instead of the customary pony chorus, a chorus of ponies is planned. "As far as the (lane ing is concerned," exclaimed Joe Iverson, director of "The Six Little J's and You-Know-What," I fell confident that the audience will never notice the difference. Of course, the horses may prove a little too heavy for the Temple stage, but really I don't think that will m akemuch difference either, do you?" Prices for the show have been re-scaled at five cents first floor, three cents balcony, twelve pins standing room, and one box( just tall enough) for standing outside the windows )n the alley. Advance reservations may not be made at the theater, coliseum or Magee's shoe department. They may be made at Joworsgzl's Market, meat department, or not at all. Pig BUhiiicr Lincoln Journal. SON'S EDUCATION J SUV! NO GOU CALL NO 8 O 'CLOCKS U HALL ALMOST PAID FOP Al Moseman Calls Meeting To Order, Sorority Members Leave. In keeping with an age-old tra dition, the Student Council, now of "white spot" fame, met late yesterday afternoon to follow the precedent of doing nothing. While the meeting was being called to order by its president and vice president of the Innocents society, Al Moseman, William Clayton, an other Innocent, chief artilleryman, Cornhusker head, etc., began a presentation speech in order that sorority members of the group might leave in time for dinner. Clayton's speech was long, force ful, and full of appropriate ges tures. At the half-way mark Dave Bernstein, another Innocent and all-around activititc, walked into (Continued on Pago 3.) New Issue Is Unreadable, Lousy, Atrocious, Punk, Phooey. "Yesterday the most lousy, un readuble, terrible, atrocious blasted Awgwan that has ever been printed made its appearance on newsstands around the world," according to Editor Bruce Camp bell, jr. "Never have I been so ashamed of anything as that bunrh of refined rags," he further stated. The first four pages of this mas terpiece was devoted to Vergil's famous Acneid. Following that were several features concerning Hanibal, Caesar, and Hamurabbi. A two page candid camera array of "When Grandma learned to dance the Minuet," was featured. A few poems by Guest, Browning, and Coleridge padded the pages. Unique is the only word to de scribe the cover of Grecian art done in brown and maroon. With this edition the magazine will lose 350,000 customers for the first copy. This will probably be the last magazine published for awhile according to the editor. Ag Campus Sets Up Camp East OfSoshllall Ag campus prepared this morn ing to move their 499 people en masse upon the fertile east 40 west of teachers college, the site se lected by the Rehabilitation bureau as the most likely place to grow Major Offensive onions for export to Hap's, home of Glori fied Hamburgers. Their hree horse spade and the.Moseman, pat. pending, water-can were brought along intact Plowing Began Yesterday. Plowing was begun yesterday Continued, pa 3. STUDENT COUNCIL PEOPLES MEET DO u V University oE (W hite Spol of VO NO TUITION NO no 6QEHS MUTHN' Hungarian Dramatist To Eligible Students Entrance Exams Weed Out Those Unfit to Hear Stirring Convocation. Charlotte dn llajek, Hungarian dramatist, will discuss the theater and literary culture today before a university convocation which will be composed of students passing entrance examinations previous to the program. FOR YOUR EASE OF MIND The Daily Ncbraskan staff decided to jump the gun a bit today and put out a semi-April Fool edition in order that the important day should not es cape unnoticed even with the opening of the vacation period. Once a year, member of the staff proceed to let their minds wander and have a grand time thinking of almost impossibles that might be and of the pos sibles that, might have been. Thus, we're'asking you to bear with us while we have our fun and join with us while we view the University of Nebraska at tht white spot of the nation's universities! The Dally Nebraskan Staff. I J. E. Hoover Says Wun Lung Woo Scrammed With $150,000 Swag. rfucini uiiict'is wornum im ui--1 U. of N. campus last night un-j earthed a "tag day" collection! , i . f : .. .. ! . : . ,ka racket which J. Edgar Hoover de scribed as "unparalleled in the annals of International criminol ogy." Four Chinese were arrested as a result of investigations, but a (Continued on Page 4.) E Mr. Watchem Amazed to Fi nd Only a Little Profiteering. "The most efficient, well work ing and effective student book store that we have examined dur ing the past six years" was the .iContiuued on Page 44 BOOKSTOR S ISO VERY INT W UYJ Nebraska lite Nation) NO POLlCEr' mo POLITICS The entranc.9 examinations, which will be given at 10 o'clock this morning, wi!) consist of ten spelling words, three problems in calculus, four chemistry problems, and eight definitions of words, for one part. The second part will be made up of questions concerning the ways of wherefores of who. The convocation is at 11 o'clock, with students boing required to score at least 2G'a percent in the test to attend. Library Gels Bullcr's O. K. Before Buying Love Book 25 'Slogum Houses' Added To Entice Attention Of N. U. Readers. Students will )c happy to hear that the library has purchased a new copy of that famous novel. "Lady Chattcrly's Lover.'' to re place the copy bought last year which is worn beyond repair. Be fore placing it on tho shelves, li brary officials have arranged to have Omaha's fiery mayor, Dan Butler, leaf thru the volume and mark those paragraphs worthy of special attention on the part of the reader. Other notable purchases made by the library include 25 copies of "Sloguni House" by Nebraska's own Marie Sandoz if you didn't know that before, and two copies of "Tobacco Road," New York stage success. "Tobacco Road" wn.i ordered on receipt of a writ ten recommendation from Mayor Butler while "Slogum House" is Intended to make more complete tho library's collection of Nebras ka authors. When questioned fur ther on the selection of "Slogum House," Librarian Robert Miller Genius Invades Schooner Pages At Last Prairie Schooner, Nebraska weekly literary magazine edited by Dr. L. C. Wimberly. will be flashed upon an impatiently wait ing campus today carrying ex quisite specimens from the works of the American geniuses, Edgar A. Guest, James Whitcomb Riley, and Will Rogers. Gazing from the cover of the periodical will bo the handsome features of the 1926 Man of the Year, Col. Charles Augustus Lind bergh, of whom Dr. Wimberly says, "The man who has outdone all others in courage, in science, and In battering tho race of hu mankind." Guest Artist, Among the works which will ap pear are "It Takes A Heap O'Liv in' " by Guest, "Little Orphan An nie" by Riley, and selections from the philosophical writings of Rogers. Concerning the thrse men, the editor in his foreword says of all, "In these men we find the deep philosophical thought which few have the sense to appreciate. In their works is found the sordid realism of life. I pronounce these men superior to all others in their styles, in their Ideas, and in their Interpretations.". w UVJ . NO 3APBS NO NO Talks According to Dr. Harry Kurz, chairman of the convocation com mittee, the seats, floors, doors curtains, stage, and windows of the Temple theatre, (which is the location of the convocation) have been oiled, greased, repaired, and fixed to insuro strict silence and attention to the rpeakcr. I'pon leaving the convocation, students will receive crisp new five-dollar bills In appreciation for their attention during the talk. said popular demand had demand ed it, "and," he added with a sly wink, "If any of the copies remain in the library long enough, they might generate enough heat to burn the building down." Info For Polly Sigh. For the information of Tolly Sigh instructor who ordered the book, stated that he did so on the personal recommendation of Field Marshall Goering. "Students," he said, "must learn not to condemn such enlightened cultural and so cial programs as outlined by der Fuehrer in his literary master piece." To keep strictly up to date, the library has also ordered about 0 textbooks by Nebraska univer sity's most prolific professors. Al- tho the library already had old copies of most of these volumes, the new, revised editions were con sidered iinllspeiisiblc as many of them hnd as much as three or four pages changed. A partial list of the new text books abov? mentioned includes "On Account of Because" by Don ald B. Cold to be used by Bus. Ad (Continued on Page 3.) II Took l.ril In this picture you see Lin coln's newest skyline there Is a ned one every morning caught In a dust storm by the Nebras kan's best and only cameraman. Notice that the capitol tower Is completely ecjlpsod ti the-dirty EVENTUALLT OPENS; 3 W.P.A. Drive Begun Seeking Duplicate Structure for Campus. I'niVCISit v of Nebraska's lux urious $72.50 Student Vninn hnilri. inc oneiieil this ninrnlno- nt B o'clock, just three months ahead or scliediile. A crowd of students seethlnc with excitement, had milled about the structure all night awaiting the oneiiinc. As the hour in. proached (nr the chancellor tn hack the. tape across the entrance, me inrong grew restless and broke thniogh the soft pine doors, which through an oversight were minus hinges. As the collegians tor into the hallway of the new Student Activity building, they brushed inu snoveis irom under three W. P. A. workers. The trio of men were promptly rushed to a local hospital. Provide Shovels. Attending Physician Hacknev reports that two of the men are (Continued on Page 2). E L Students Hear Lectures Like Mother Used to Get. The picket fence policy adopted by the Board of Regents three years ago has resulted in the loss of only one professor during the past two years, it was revealed to day by a member of the board. Altho Regent I. Hirem declined to discuss the matter fully, the former Greenville farmer ex plained the new "white spot" policy for the fiist time. "The picket fence policy has worked wonders," Gegent Uirem stated. "The old professors can't get out and the new ones can't get in. In such a way the old (Continued on Page 3.) ENGINEERS WARNED MUSI FAIL TO SHOW UP 3:00 Definitely Not The Time of Today's Meeting This evening at 3 o'clock, the United States federation of chem ical, civil, and so forth engineers will definitely not hold a meeting this afternoon in Mechanical arts building room 20.". Mr. Klsmere Potts will not attend as the major speaker of the tiny with an address on "Burning Your Britches Before You Come to Them." President Cal I. Flour urges that no members attend. This is a white spot meeting, if it were to meet. for This Shot NOT irom Llncmn Jo'imat, gale. Governor Cochran issued a statement that it was Just as well, for the sower was taking his first day off In seven years. The cameraman apologizes for the express truck marring the icenic view of tht state house. STUDENT UNION MEN HURT IN RUSH PICKET FENC POLICY PREVENTS OSS OF FACULTY i Ai i - : i ::r-- it; i ! !
