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Ibis trials
The English professor was absent
minded. This was a great trial to him.
Tils wife had formed the habit of ty
ing strings to his fingers to remind
hi in of the Bpool of thread or the pack
age of needles, which she sometimes
needed from downtown, and conse
quently he often came to class with
bits of twine adorning his strong right
hand. These strings were usually pink
or blue, for his wife deemed that the
brighter the color the more effective
the reminder, and she explained this
to him so sensibly and withal so seri
ously that the Profesor had not the
heart to remonstrate. If the Btudents
Bmiled, he lengthened the assignment
He traced this misfortune back to
the- year In which he read Junior
themes. Often he thought of that year,
especially when inexperienced and un
initiated persons referred in his hear
ing to the delightful and easy life of
a college professor.
Those themes had marked a chapter
in his life. They had occupied his
mind to the exclusion of other matters,
so that he forgot his classes and his
necktie. Even after years ho could
recall the characteristics of style, .both
general and individual. In them he
found wild, weird figures of speech, and
casual allusions to "Reversion of Type"
or "Evolution of the Species." He
spent much time and thought trying to
interpret certain subtle "effects," and
sometimes he could not determine,
whether they were mood, character or
incident, so subtle were they.
While reading, his mind mechanical
ly and involuntarily sought after the
maximum consummation and the sul)
jeetlvo climax, and sometimes ho could
not find them. Frequently he thought
he sighted the maximum consumma
tion, and then was forced to abandon
it because he could discover no major
obstacle.
"13" and "T" was another thing that
troubled him in these themes. Often
he feared that neither "Beauty" nor
"Truth" could be appropriatly applied
to them. This was usually after ho
had finished reading an essay on "The
Problem of the Universe," or a stor
which dealt with the nobility of Eng
land. Sometimes he was afraid that he
would never reach the middle of the
third act, or in other words, he did not
know whether ho would finish the
themes or the themes would finish
him. It was during this period of
doubt that he deeply offended the most
popular member of Maka Data. The
young man in question had missed an
examination, and so he approached the
English Professor and asked what he
should do about It. The English Pro
fessor looked up from a Junior theme,
in which the "kindling tint" had not
yet been given.
"Ah, yes," ho said absently, "thatS
alright. Just read up on the subject
and then you can tell me all you know
in a few minutes."
When the next semester same, the
Maka Data registered in another di
vision. That was only the beginning. On
the- day when ho read the essay or,
"Nature," by the young lady with the
French heels and an. exaggerated pom
padour, he forgot to wear his overcoat
homo and took a severe cjjld.
One brilliant and literary young Ju
nior wrote an article on "Lady Mac
beth," and in It characterized her as
"spry," and said that "she did her
stunts on double quick yme," This
one he marked "c plus."
There was an effusion on the subject
of "Affinities," which caused him to
spread his toast on his lap and butter
his napkin at breakfast the next morn
ing. But when he read the story by
tno class poet, entitled, "Parted, Yet
They Meet," his heart went out in sym
pathy and compassion to the theme
readers, and he had an impression t lint
something ought to be done for them
as an oppressed and suffering class.
This impression became a firm and
deep-seated conviction, when he read
in a dissertation on "The Writing ot
English." that "The great consterna
tion is when a person wants something
to happen " He wrote on the margin
in red ink, "You have confused the
terms 'Consternation' and 'Consumma
tion.' " Then ho sighed deeply and
blotted It witli a letter which his wife
had given him to mall.
It was just about this time that he
reached the middle of the third act,
that is. he felt that he would finish
the- themes, and that the struggle would
end comedlally, if no new forces were
set in motion.
But this did not end his troubles.
One day he allowed a Lady Instructor
to stand talking lor fully five minutes
while he inadvertently remained sea'
ed. When she passed him thereafter,
she greeted him coldly.
He made a grammatical error in
class, and it was this which rankled
In his bosom for a long, long time
even after the Maka Data had gradu
ated, and thfc Lady Instructor had mar
ried. But at length the last theme was fin
ished and he marked 'it "a plus," not
withstanding the fact that It was a
story entitled, "Lady Angelina's
choice." After it was all over, and h"
looked back upon it, he felt with n
certain pride that he had met his Wa
terloo, and had conquered. But he
knew that ho had not come out of the
fight unscathed. Ho was no longer
'he same as he was before. He had
often told his classes that when one
reads any piece of literature which af
fects him greatly he is never quite tlio
jame afterward. He knew now that
t was true. He could have given his
Undents examples from him own ex
ooriences, he might even have held up.
in proof, his right hand, decorated with
its little strings of pink and blue,
but he refrained. Why he refrained
is a problem for psychologists, and one
into which we can not enter here.
LETA S.
The Oliver Theatre
F. C ZEHRUNG, and O. T. CRAWFORD Mgrs.
Phone 354. Cor. P and J3tfa
Y. W. C. A. Meeting.
Over one hundred girls were present
at the "Vesper Service" Friday even
ing. The talk biven by Miss Paxson
on "Facts of a Savior" is ono that
should have been heard by every girl
in the University. The spiritual depths
and the earnest feeling, manifested by
the speaker, can not but leave a last
ing influence on all who heard her
Every girl should improve these oppor
tunitles and hear Miss Paxson and
come in contact with such a life and
thus through her be led nearer to the
Master.
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Call at Riggs' Pharmacy and get one
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