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H jfreebman's trials anb Experiences
His Period of Probation and the Processes of Learning How.
Anyone could tell that ho was a
Freshman. His ulr of careless
abandon, IiIb swaggering Independence
and utter unconcern Indicated only too
clearly that ho had not as yet been
ground between the mill stones of
experiences and polished by contact
with the vicissitudes and harrowlngs
of routlno college life. With a false
self-possession ho looks boldly Into the
faces of tho passerB-by with an assert
lvenesB that proclaims his right to
live and move and have a being and
his triple-fold consclenconess of the
rights and privileges guaranteed him
In tho preamble of that Immortal doc
ument, Tho Declaration of Independ
ence. With his handB In his pockets
and with a belabored and hackneyed
Imitation of last summer's popular
tune Issuing from his lips ho surveys
the tall buildings of tho campus, out
wardly seeming to take thorn as a mat
ter of fact, while Inwardly comparing
them to tho little meeting-house where
he used to worship In tho far off land
of his birth
Slowly and majestically he pounds up
tho stone stops of the main hall and
anchors himself conspicuously In the
midst of a group of veterans who view
him with amusement and portray in
their minds the long and difficult pro
cess he must undergo In passing
through tho various Btages of enlight
enment. There ho stands, critically
giving ear to their conversation, and
wisely . comprehending enough of Its
Import to drag himself deeper Into the
mire of his arrogant misconception of
tho rules and by-laws that govern a
studont's Btatus In the college com
munity. Mistaking their Indulgence for Inter
est, he breakB Into their discourse with
a volloy of childish assertions, intend
ing to bIiow his Intimate acquaintance
with tho Intricacies and polluted state
of class politics, but In reality laying
are IiIb social position as a simple
child of the soil with a distressing Ig-
ranco of the world and tho ways of
no
men. ileedleBB of tho Bmiles or sar
casmThat greet his efforts, he pursues
his Insane harranguo with relentless
onorgy, smashing all tho barriers of ro
sorvo and good sense that Intervene be
tweent rationality and utter folly.
With a piquancy and versatility born
of an excitable and unstable Imagina
tion, he narratoa Incidents of his career
Interwoven with veins of fallacy that
show through In lurid streaks to the
trained perception of his hearerB. Ho
entertains them with a thrilling ac
count of how ho won tho foot-race on
tho 4th of July, how ho climbed the
greased pole and captured the prize at
tho top, and how he carried home In
triumph tho greaBe-bedaubed porker
that tried to elude his untiring pursuit
In vain. Ho also tells how Deacon
Walker's cow fell Into tho well and
was hauled out not hurt a bit; how Old
Mother Smith went wrong at the reli
gious meeting and hollored "Glory Hal
leluja!" and upset the. stove; horn he
hung tho dead rat to Parson Davis'
door knob on Hallowe'en night, and
how Red Walker the famous slab
artist had devoted an afternoon In
attempting to fan him, Red's foxlness
and stratetgy meeting at' every turn
with ignominious failure, as he ham
mered tho ball to the four corners of
tho eartht sending It upon ono occa
sion through the open window In Uie
second story of thi Grand Opora House.
Ho tolls of an amusing Incident that
Fatty Donald figured In. Fatty went
4o call on his best girl ono night, and
they Bat out on the front stoop to
talk It over. Now Fatty was of a
somnolent disposition and as tho even
ing advanced ho wandered Into tho land
of Morpheus (I think that's tho place).
Anyhowvthe girl's romantic nature did
not harmonlzo with the low sweet love
song that Fatty's Bnores wafted to her
ears and you can't guess what she did.
She took a piece of paper and wrote
on it, "I hopo you'll wako up In time
for breakfast," and then left him snor
ing away. Fatty folt pretty bIck when
tho story gpj. out, and tiie boys would
always snore when he came within two
blocks of them. Old Davy Byers
pretty near busted himself laughing
and thought It was the richest thing
ho over heard.
After he had thoroughly acquainted
his long-suffering subjects with his own
sense of lmportanco, he begins his
search for the place whoro ho must
make himself solid with tho powers
that purport to be. After an Invasion
of the basement, the Chancellor's of
fice, and the open rooms of the chemi
cal laboratory, he finally finds some
man with a true Christian spirit wno
helps him through the oraeal of get
ting his high school credits- examined
and finding the registrar's office.
He takes his place in tho lino, form
ing a unit In the sweltering and turbu
lent mass of humanity that Is bent
upon squeezing through the narrow
door, all at the same time. Inch by
inch he moves up, until at tho very
verge of the goal. Then life becomes
unpleasant. A. sharply pointed elbow
coincides with tho lower portion of his
diaphragm and he bespeaks his annoy
ance. He stands on tip-toe to get a
view of the Interior of tho room, and
someone yells, "Rubber." Ho sees a
pretty girl standing near him and he
stops and looks at her. He has nearly
,caught her eye when a paper wad from
an unseen quarter takes him In the
back of the neck, and makes him feel
mad and silly. Finally he Ib caught In
the rush and carried through. And
then comes another wait, and an oppor
tunity Is given for the dents in his
anatomy to smooth themselves out and
his organs of respiration to regain their
normal efficiency.
Before him Is a wall of students
either trying to get or retain a place at
tho desk, each one cursing or crying
under his heath. A gap flnany appears
and with cyclonic velocity he rushes
In, and finds himself gazing Into the
in, and finds himself gazing in the
claslc and placid countenance of the
registrar. He Is handed a slip of paper,
which he takes with as much prompti
tude and decision as a man would dis
play upon being sewed up with a live
crab for dinner. Howovor, an idea hits
him that he is to write down what he
wants to take. ThiB done he extends
the slip toward the registrar with a
violence of movement that causes that
dignitary to duck In genuine alarm for
the safety of tho point of his jaw. Then
an explanation follows. Poor Frcshle
has overlooked tho matter of paying
his incidental and matriculation fees
and tho avarice of the treasurer must
be satisfied. He must fight his way out
and return again. If Arnold von Wln
klereld had had such a task as that
when ho tackled the bristling line of
the Austrlans, ho would have given It
up for a bail job and taken to tho
woods. But our hero succeeds and ere
the gathering shades of night envelop
this section of the world, his name Is
onrolled on the list of the faithful and
he Is a part not the whole of the
student body of the great University
of Nebraska.
Saturday night comes and he goes to
the Y. M. C. A. reception. Though
somewhat dazed at the largeness or
the hall and the Intensity of the light,
ho is encouraged by the show of gtfod
fellowship and makes himself at home.
He meets many of his own getuiB who
are at the same stage of evolution and
who have also far to travel In ascend
ing the scale of civilization. With a
dutiful civility ho seats himself and
folds his hands all orderly whilo,Uie
speaking Is in progress. In the inter
mission that follows previous to the
sorvlng of refreshments, he makes a
number of acquaintances, whoso names
and faces glldo from his memory as
soon as they pass from notice. He finds
a friend at last with a disposition sim
ilar to his own, and to him he relates
a thrilling adventure:
"Had to pack up and git In a hur
ry." ho exclaimed. "Hit tho con with
a rotten lemon. And say, Mister, yd"u
ought tcr seen lilm hop. Just like a
mule with his tall afire. And I didn't
stay ter console him, neither. I lit out
in a rush for tall timber. Jumpln
Moses, but he was hot,"
It Is time npw to serve tho sherbet,
and a grand'rush is Instituted for tho
locus of the supply. Our hero rushes
In among tho foremost, with the sa,mo
Intensity of purpose that a small boy
exhibits In going to pieces where he has
been told not to go. An account of his
experience can best bo 'gleaned from
his own vernacular.
"I didn't mean for a minute to be at
the tall-end when It camo to diggln' in
for the Ice. And I wan't neither. I
slipped In and poked my saucer under
the noso of tho guy that was servln' It
up. Then I swooped down on the
Nablscos, and made such a hole In 'era
that the MIsbub a handlln' 'em told me
to chase myself In a hurry. I worked
my sandy a couple of times more be
fore they got wind of what was up.
And then they shut down on me. But
that didn't mako no difference. I got
into a hungry crowd that said they
hadn't had any yet, and I fooled 'em
slick and got Into the push for a fourth
dish."
It Is Monday morning now and he
sets out for his class. How he misses
the old high school bell and how he
wishes he could recite all his lessonB
In one room. After a toilsome Hearch
he locates his class rooms and goes
In to tremble under the hollow digni
ty of tho profs. He is called upon to
recite and with a sudden and convul
sive effort he staggers to his feet, only
to be told to seat himself and flro away
from his first line of defense. He Is
pleased to meet his class-mates and
Is determined to trent them all alike,
and show favors to none. Butsomeshow
a certain amount of reserve toward
him. This ho attributes to shyness,
and continues to bo "hall fellow well
mot."
He goes arouud to the first night's
try-out at drill. With the rest of the
effervescent youths, he rushes In to se
cure a place, surging and pushing with
the rest of them with all the energy
that a force of men might exert In ex
tricating a fat man caught In a narrow
water-pipe. As tho days go by he Ib
subjected to the setting-up exercises.
Fearfully obedient he executes the var
ious movements at the command of the
stiff before him, who forgets he Is noth
ing more than a human being like him
self. He Is mildly told "ter stand-up
and get the crook outer his back," to
"keep his hands down ter his sides
with his feet at an angle of 45 degrees."
Each evening he crawls around and
puffers In misery and gallops home In
delight when tho torture is finished.
At the end of two weeks he has become
quite an accomplished jumping-jack.
At the end of two more weeks a
marked change In his demeanor and de
portment is observed Ho has become
more sober and less noisy. His clat
tering tongue no longer disturbs the
quiet of the campus, nor does his mirth
ful laughter drive the birds from their
nests. The dagoes fool that their
wares are more secure and are recover
ing fom the severe nervous strain that
they have been subjected to. Tho "hot
tamalo" man drives his car through the
streets without dreading lest the win
dows be broken and without having to
flro uninvited passengers off the back
steps. The slot machines are enjoying
a rest, and their penny-clutching con
tents have ceased to slide.
Tho Freshman Is becoming accli
mated. Ho has begun to see college
life as it really Is. With a crushed
spirit he stands meekly aside waiting
for the proud Soph or Junior to paBs,
and retires humbly to a distance when
a noble and stately Senior approaches.
Under a mighty load of sorrow he ploda
along to his classes, fearing to ralso
his ejes from the ground lest someone
might taken offense and hit him.
Day by day he pursues this weary
round, but he is learning. He will
not always be a Freshman and the dis
tant future holds out a brlghtex-pros-pect
for him. In tho passing of time
he will be wiser and stronger and may
even bring others, to respect him. Ho
has a hard lesson to learn, but when it
Is once mastered ho will have a strong
ly developed character and a storehouse
of experiences that will always stand
him in good stead.
ALJjLtAJMAAtAAJMAA4LAJLR
Swell New
HARRY
125 South I2th,
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9&ASUUlAJiajUUiaJ).&Sl&&A&A&A&JUi
$25.00!
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To the Pacific g
Coast
Tickets on Sale Daily to November
30, 1903. Call and get lull
information.
G. W. BONNELL
G. P. S T. A. LINCOLN
Printing.
THE
IVY PRESS CO.,
125 North 12th.
DIERKS LUMBER
& COAL CO.
Wholesale and Retail
Lumber and Coal
Manufacturers
Yellow Pino
of
General office 20 "1-202-203 Fraternity Bide
Yards 125 to 140 So. Eighth St.
Telephone Gen. office 120; Lumber
Yard 13; Coal yard 45.
Lincoln, 3Z Nebraska.
anything you Invent or improvo : also Ret
CAVEAT JRADE-MARK, COPYRIGHT or RESIGN
PROTECTION. Bond model, ekotch, or photo,
for free examination and advice.
MMf flM DATFUT.Qf?- noau,-.
ww vii vii i m i hii i u jee oeioro patent.
C.A.SNOW& CO.
i'ausnt Lawyere. W AS H I N GTO N , D . C .
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II
Stationeiy
PORTER
LINCOLN, NEBRASKA
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