RJEtriiaiir.Sj( ptr "w? w.ri iifrt -r.. i . i I' , ' J -. k . -t - '" ' "' . t IP Gbe 33 a 1 1 mebraeft an 3 'V fcfc IVir. 1 lii; 'm Columbia National Bank OF LINCOLN, NEBRASKA Capital, $100,000.00 OFFICERS John B. Wright, President J. H. Wescott, Vice-President Joe SamueU. 2d Vice-President P. L. HauV Cashier W. B. Ryons, Asst. Cashier Dr. J. R. HAGGARD 'Physician and Surgeon Special attention paid to diseases ol iemales and rectal diseases. Rooms 212 to ZU Richards Block. Resi dence 1 3 1 0 C Strt. Office TeUpheos 635. Resldencs Telsphons L 984. THB ONLY UP-TO-DATB Billiard and Pool Parlor IN TOWN NO SALOON ATTACHED Tables newly covered Powell's, 146 North llth 8t. Phone L 664 THE FIRST NATIONAL BANK OF LINCOLN, NEBRASKA Cupltfd $200,000; Surplus $100,000; 'Profits $18,319; Deposits $293,093 S. H. Burnhm, President A. J. Sawyer, Vics-President H. S. Freeman, Cashier H. B. Brans, Assistant Cashier UNITED BTATKS DEPOSITORY BOWLING ALLEY 8 ALLEYS Standard and regulation in every particular. I2IO O 8t. H.C.Thomas, Proprietor Genuine Gas Coke 1 $9.00 per ton Lincoln Gas & Electric Llzht Co. $ 1323 o St. SxfiX if n DIERKS LUMBER & COAL CO. Wholesale and Retail Lumber and Coal MANUFACTURERS ,OF YELLOW PINE Genertl office 201-202-203 Fraternity Bldg Ytrds 125 to 149 So. Eighth St Telephones Gen. office 120; Lumber yard 13; Cool yard 35. Lincoln, Nebraska SPALDING'S OFFICIAL ATHLETIC ALMANAC FOR J903 Edited by J. E. Sullivan jrlW Over The only alma- 530 pictures jt nac published I Lr that contain .UK a complete lUt prominent RB of American American lj& Amateur Best- t, . and ZA on-Recordi , -ii I' x and complete k; foreign pi Y .. . -.. Av- VI lUt 0 Cham- ' tb "' J0rCVT' pions. PRICE 10 CENTS -for talc by all newticaler and A. G. SPALDING & BROS. New York, Chicago. Denver, Baltimore, Buffalo Spalding's complete catalogue of Athletic Sports sent free to anv address Overheard" "Is this tho way to Wareham?" Asked the girl with gym suit on. "It's how I've always Worn 'em," Said astonished Farmer. John. A NebraBkan reporter was Indulging in tho rather dangerous pastime of bib lical quotations. "It's a case of 'feed ing loaves to the fishes,' " he remarked concerning a certain course the paper had pifrsued; and then, as a smile ran quickly around the group of faces at the other table: "I guess I got my parables mixed; I meant 'bread cast upon tho waters,' and not the 'twelve baskotsful' story." A freshman once heard a senior tell ing a story and stopped to hear it. This was tho storjt: "Tho crow says to the owl, 'I'm going to get married.' The owl says to the crow, "To-whoo! tu-whoo'!" The Benlor laughed upon concluding his story, and then the freshman knew It was funny. Although he didn't see the point, he was sure that it was a Joke, and stored it up in his mind. Meeting a fellow freshman he proceeded to unburden his mind by telling the story to him, giving the I sense, if not tho exact words, and narrating thus: "Tho crow says to tho owl, 'I'm going to get married.' Then the owl up and says to the crow, 'Who are you going to get married to?' " "Few people," said a professor to his class, "know what others have to suf fer. Apparent ill-nature or meanness can oftentimes be traced to bodily suf fering as a cause. I once knew a man who was reputed to be 111-tem-perod and disagreeable and who waB tho object of much abuse. People said that such a fellow had no right to live and that he would be better off If he was dead. But I came to know the man and to see many good points in him. Ho waB afflicted by a cancer of the most terrible kind, which caused him unceasing pain. Sometimes I would talk with him and I came to realize that he would, under ordinary conditions, be a very agreeable man. One day ho died. People never knew of his suffering, but seemed to think his taking off was a good riddance. They never thought of any mitigating circumstances. All spoke HI of him but me. In fact, everyone thought he was the meanest man they had ever heard of except me." And the class laughed. "AJost of the professors In these western institutions are sociable and democratic men," said an old college man recently, "but take them back east, you'll find them In matoy places Just the opposite. You seldom find a western student driven to extremes, In seeking vengeance upon an over bearing or unjust Instructor, but I must say that this was hardly the case when I went to college. I re member one prof In particular -for whom I came to cherish a wholesome dislike. Mathematics was hiB hobby, and ho was sojconcelted and vain that life In his class was unendurable. In some way or other I incurred his dis pleasure and he sat down on me so hard upon several occasions that I- .began to cast about to find some means of getting ovon with- him. In those days many 6f the students managed to earn some money toward their ex penses by working a small plot of ground in the summer time and sell ing the vegetables they raised. I had a small patch of turnips Just beyond the city limits, which occupied most of 44 my spare moments and of which I ex pected great results. One- ovonlng while I was hoeing In my patch I ran across a bull snake and killed him. He was tho largest and fnttest reptile that I had over seen and was a regu lar prodigy In bIzo, cvori for those of his kind. There was a little dried up turnip plant closo by that seemed scarcely able to maintain Itself and so I concluded to try an experiment. Scraping a hole, I wrapped tho body of tho snake about tho roots of tho turnip and hilled it up nicely with fresh boII. As the freshmen Bay In their annual Bhort stories, 'tlirio passed on. The turnips had matured and It was time to dig them. I Bet to work one after noon and waB piling them up In rapid 'style when I came across one that was a wonder In bIzo. It was tho biggest turnip I ever saw. I gazed at It for some tlrao, wondering at Its marvellous size. Then I noticed a number of dried particles hanging to its roots, and the mystery was solved. That was the turnip which I had fertilized with the bull snake. But as big as the turnip was, I could hardly reconcile myself to the thought of eating It, having In mind tho conditions under which it was grown. It seemed a pity to throw it away, and I was for a long time unresolved as to what I should do about It. Then I remembered my old enemy the professor. Hero was a chance to even up matters with him, and I was mighty glad to grasp It. Accordingly the next day I took It up to his house and presented It to him. Ho was delighted with the present and thanked me profusely, and assured me that he would have It cooked right up for dinner. I was satisfied to let mat ters stand as they were. After that I never had any trouble with him at all. He was 'always affable and prompt In explaining formulae that I didn't un derstand. In fact, he became so all fired obliging that I really came to like him. But you may rest assured that I nover took any pains to acquaint him with tho secret of the fertilizer that I used In ralBlng (hat wonderful turnip." For Sale. Anyone thinking of buy ing a wheel this spring will do well to call on the "Dally." Wo have several taken on advertising that will go at 25 per cent discount for cash. "Can yo spare mo Just a moment? Bald tho university poet to the editor. "No sir, you Infernal nuisance," re plied the editor savagely, "I won't spare you for even a single second." And he straightway proceeded to kick him out. If you are needing Spectacles or Eye-glasses we can give you a perfect fit. Eyes examined free. Hallett, Jeweler and Optician, 1143 O St.; 30 years' experience. "Why do you walk so heavily?" asked the professor of the fat fresh man. 'It's Just my weigh." was the reply. C. E. Brown, Dentist Burr block. CUMULATES BONBONS : Sold only by Harley Drug Co., llfchr& OjSts BUSINESS DIRECTORY. Tito NebrnMkin Advcrtlaem In this list deserve tho trnilo of nil lojwl Univer sity pooplo. . BAKERYMrs. J. W. Petry. BANKS First National, Columbia Na tional, Farmers and Merchants, Lin coln Safo Deposit and Trust Co. BARBER SHOPS Palace, Shannon's Pioneer, R. and C. BICYCLES, ATHLETIC GOODS H. E. Sidles Cyclo Co., A. O. Spalding A BroB., Chicago; Gidard Cyclo Co., H. Wittmann & Co., Samuel Hall. BOOKS AND STATIONERYr-Co-Op., H. M. Brown Drug and Book Co., Harry Porter, Uni. Book Store, Sam uel Hall. BOWLING ALLEY H. C. Thomas, Crescent. CIGAR8, ETC. M. D. Clay, L. L. Llnd soy, Stevens & Neville, F. A. Powell, Wohlenberg. CLOTHING Mageo & Dcemer, B. L. Paine Clothing Co., Cottrelll & Leon ard, Albany, tf. Y.; Tho Toggery. , COAL P. D. Smith Coal Co., C. B. Gregory, WMtobreast Coal Co. CONFECTIONERY R, W. Maxwell Co., Lincoln Candy Kitchen. DENTI8TS C. E. Brown, Bontz. DRUGGISTS Riggs, Rector, Brown, Flegenbaum, Harloy, Stelner, Weom poner, Oliver Thoatro Pharmacy., DRY GOODS Miller & Paine. ELECTRICAL GOOLi Ross' Electrlo Co. FURNITURE Hardy Furniture Co., Rudge & Guenzel. GAS Lincoln Gas & Electric Co. GROCERS Farmers Grocery Co., Key stone Cash Grocery. HAIRDRE8SING, ETC. The Famous. HARDWARE Rudge & Guenzel. HOTEL Llndoil, Grand Windsor. JEWELERS E. E. Hallett, C. A. Tucker. LAUNDRIES Yule BroB., EVanB. LIVERIES W. O. Forbes. LUMBER Dlerks Lumber & Coal Co. MILLINERY The Famous. MUSIC Rosb P. Curtice, -Matthews Pi ano Co. NOVELTIES Capital Novelty Works. PAINT AND GLASS Western Glass & Paint Co. PHOTOGRAPHERS Townsend. OCULISTS M. B. Ketchum. ' PHYSICIANS J. R. Haggard, H. Aley. POOL AND BILLIARDS Powell S. i & Son. PRINTING Now Century, Ivy Press. RAILROADS Burlington, Union Pa cific, Northwestern. RESTAURANTS Merchants' Caie, Don Cameron, Palace Dining Hall, Restaurant Unique,- Francis Bros., Hendry. SADDLERY H. Wittmann & Co., SHINES Lincoln Shiniqg Parlor. SHOES Sanderson, Perkins & Shel don, Electric Shoe Co. SUITORIUM Weber Bros., T. A.. Burt TAILOR Bumatead, Unland. TRANSFER Lincoln Local Express, Lincoln Transfer -Co., Globe Delivery Co. HIGH CRAPE st t ' H ' .SI 1 . -J I 'l CI J Vi ; , 1 1 1 "H 1 iTt r -v . - u i., JF. ... .. ; &a& n ,. ; y"- i tys k wry r fc .'. T . J ,-tii iS mk ie?.ii;..lLi& .,.i?.l i 4V- ,rVIfe.""' ' 'lii mmjmmmctbtx, iirniffiinlinif