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SATURDAY NEBRASKAN
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the Other Side
"CHAR'CTER FEX.
Tho superintendent of the city
schoola sat tilted back in hla revolv
ing offlco choir, hlB feet upon tho cor
ner of the curtain-top desk, reading
tho proceedings of "last-night's school
board meeting" in the morning paper.
Tho door opened suddenly and a tin
dinner-pail grasped firmly In a big
grimy hand was thrust Inside, fol
lowed by tho owner. To thTJ superin
tendent's polite "good morning" was
V ' the response "mornln'," and tho man
and the pall stood very stiff and still.
"Do you wlBh to see me?" Inquired
the superintendent, folding hla paper
and wheeling round with has back to
tho desk.
"I want tub. see that there mun
what we taxpayers gives two thou
sand dollars a year tuh run thlBh
schools an' expect 'em tuh run 'em."
"I am the superintendent of tho
city schools. What can I do for you?
Won't you sit down?"
Tho visitor did not move.
"I hain't time tuh set down. Work
In' men hain't es much use fur fine
churs es somo folks hez. Whut 1
come fur Is, of you're thuh superin
tendent, I want yuh folks tuh under
stan' 'ut I won't hev my boysoln' tuh
school whur youngsters is larn't tuh
dlsrcspeck thur parents, an' thet's
what they're beln' larn't mostly now
adays near'a I cun make out."
"Who Is your son's teacher?"
"Why, thet hlgh-flyln' teacher yuh
got hwer frum th' un'vors'ty hez 'em
standln' on thur heads what time they
ain't wrltin' insultin' stuff 'bout thur
foikB an' talkin' 'bout proper vlttlen
an scrubbin' up ev'ry day, an' readln'
fool stuff 'bout 'socd-bables' an' 'water-babies'
an Injuns wuth outlandish
names sech us nobody never hurd uv
before.
"Now, I'd hev yuh understand thet I
mean whut I say. I ain't a man az
meddles with whut ain't my business
an' I wouldn't be hyar now only ut I
won't stand hevln' my boy lurn't tuh
dlsrespeck me un' hla mother. Whut
I want yuh tuh do Is tuh see tuh et
thet sech proceeding 18 atopped.
njpfj
ivL it vl;
m lVv$v lit
Thet's what wo pay yuh fur, tuh run
thuh schools right"
"But, aro you sure your son la
taught these thlnga at school?"
"8ure? Reckon I know. Whuh
ever heard o' 'char'ctor fox an' 'mood
fox un thuh Lord unly knows whut
uther 'fox' 'coptln' thot thur now
teacher? Ev'ry body's talkin'. 1
ain't thuh unly one whuh won't put
up with Bcch stuff much longer."
"What is thero In tho study of
'character offects' and 'mood effects'
that you object to? It may bo that
you are mistaken as to the naturo of
the work. Tho terms may need ex
planation." The man drow a greasy, crumpled
papor from his pocket and handed It
to the superintendent. Looking him
full In the faco, he added:
"Read that un' see how yu'd like
tuh be sized up thet way by yur own
boy. Thet'B whut yur brag un'vers'ty
teacher hez thuh scholars doln'."
The superintendent unfolded the pa
per and read:
"Carcter Fox On pap tuk to bIIcob
of Broad to wunst shore hes Hoglah
won't give Me 10 cents to by a Ruber
ball shozo hes mighty stinggy
shoze he lize to cos he sed he had
dont no money when I no beter. He
makes mo cary his diner sum days
when he cood do it hisself. Show hes
lazzy and dldont wan't to and swared
cos ther wuzzent no spun to eat tho
borys. Shozo lies a mighty meen
man."
The supgrlntendent's head remained
bent an instant after he had finished
reading the paper, then he looked up
and said:
"I Bhall show this paper to Miss
Bell. She will then understand what
influence her work is having upon her
school. I am Bure Bho will give you
no cause for complaint in the future.
I am very sorry this has occurred
and If at any time hereafter you have
occasion to talk over school matters,
I hope you will feel perfectly free to
come to mo with them. I regret ex
ceedingly that parents and teachers
do not get to know each other bet
ter. I hope the time Is not far dis
tant when thoy can work together for
tho good of the children."
"I'm 'blldged tuh yuh, Mr. Super
intendent. I reckoned yu'd do thuh
squar thing when yuh knowed. G'd
mornln' tuh yuh," and the door closed
before the visitor had time to hear
tho superintendent's reply.
H. S.
Mr. P. (shortly after tho death of
Frank Norrla): "Mlaa B., did you
know Frank NorrlB died last week?"
Mlaa B.: "Goodnes8, no; -who was
he, anyhow?"
Mr. P.: "Why. the' author of "the
Octopus."
Mlaa B.: "Oh, yes! that PopulUt
paper."
It was Just before 8 o'clock Tuesday
morning. With half a dozen books
under her arm and hoavily bundled
from ankles to chin agalnBt the cold,
she had just reached tho Unl. gate.
After pulling her way for a dozen
blockB through snow a foot deep with
drifts upwards to four feet, alio wa8
panting nervously, and fatigue was
hanging heavy on her limbs as she
drew her feet out of the snow behind
and planted them as deep again in
that ahead.
A husky, six-foot medic, kicking tho
snow head-high before him as he
I plowed his way along, hesitated as he
stopped up behind the faltering co-ed.
"Excuae mo, Mlaa, bul you're about
to drop a book," he said with a hu
manitarian sympathy, known only to
medics. -
The lady turned, drew another long
breath, and w.h a coy smile strug
gling through the lines of fatigue and
complaint on her pretty face, said:
"Yea, well I'm about to drop dead."
H. H. L,
Life la full of trials and the law
yers are glad of it Drake Delphic
THE FIRST OF THE MONTH.
, ' t
Will it coino?
"
Anything in Jt?
Hooray I
Pnrduo Kxponont.
FOOTBALL MAN.
Tho wild young man of Borneo haa
come back to college.
Ho Isn't keen on culture; he Isn't
Btuck on knowledge.
Book "ologleB" and "lams" are built,
ho knows, to cramp
So elocts the football course and takes
it on the campus,
He isn't long on Intellect; he's rather
short on classes;
But he's a perfect wonder on tackles,
kicks and passoB.
For Grecian roots In musty tombs ho
doesn't go n-huntlng,
But you'd forgive his Ignorance If you
ever saw his punting,
He doeBn't like professors, mere book
worms and cockroaches;
He has a special trainer and gets hla
lore from coachos;
He takes that coaches' word for law
and even hoods conjectures,
And when tho coach yells, "Hold the
ball!" it's Just aa good aa lectures.
His cap and gown aro on the wall,
his books beneath tho table;
To servo football and learning tho
wild man lan't able.
Shin pads, nose guards, spiked shoes
and such like gearing
These aro his academics, in aspoct
from cheering.
With him tho pallid cast of thought Is
not the proper fashion;
Black eyes and broken noaea and hair
a la Clrca8slan,
A Fiji, a chrysanthemum, a bogle
man, a savage,
And the earth lookB on and trembles
when ho begins his ravage.
For midnight oil he has, we fear, most
Ignominious uses
A balm for kicks and cuffs and
knocks, a liniment for bruises.
Ho knows a think or two about reduc
ing a luxation.
But that's about the limit of his high
er education.
His college course la Innocent of mat
ters too scholastic;
He gets somo wholesome exerclao, not
mental, but gymnastic.
He lan't much on reading, and he's
not to apry at .thinking.
But he learna to tako a lot of bumps
without aB much as blinking.
The Western Fellow.
Columbia, Mo.
First Junior (on way home after
tho Prom.): "You have a pensive
look. What did Bhe say?"
fc Second Junior: "Wrong that time.
It's an expensive feel I have. Got
just fifteen cents left"
Qulektr tteurtd
OBTAHTXD.
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Bna modal. Iklteh rr nhnta. I1K
dticriptlon forfrMrttMrtutopaUBUbUltr. 41-TAQI
HAHS-BOOK ruu. ConUlm nfcrtne! and foil
tnfornuiilon. WUTS FOB OOFT 07 0T7B BTX0Z1X.
u"- 11 u u moit lltxrel propotltloa titt mad br
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