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' 4
Conservative.
T o li n Waiuimakor
ENCOURAGING. grasped Emperor
William by the hand
and said : "I am glad to moot such
au enterprising young man ! " This
was no doubt very gratifying to the
youthful Hohonzollern , but there
are. a great many people who will
always think that Wanamaker should
have , at least , offered him a job
in one of his stores.
The world having
HIGH CARDS , acknowledged that
"a man is King in
his own house , " there is ample
room for the supposition that in his
own barn he may be at least a
Knave , but furnishes no excuse for
his overlooking the fact that there
are a number of higher cards in the
pack , and they are all out against
him.
A western editor
THE GREAT who discusses mili-
BEYOND. tary problems with
great solemnity ,
and should have a place on the board
of strategy , asks where the Filipinos
went after General Smith raided the
island of Samar. Those who repose
any faith in the teachings of the
Good Book are aware that all this
depends upon the past life of the
Filipinos. Some are little brown
angels ; some are not so fortunate.
The Lou i s v i 11 e
PUNGENT. O o u r i e r-J o u rual
says : ' ' Teddy is
neither sugar , nor salt. ' ' No siree !
Sugar and salt molt and run away ,
when cold water is dashed upon
them , but the astute editor of the
Courier-Journal lias discovered that
this is not a Rooseveltian character
istic ! Teddy is cayenne pepper ,
horseradish , tabasco sauce and other
strenuous\ \ seasonings all combined ,
and before Watterson , other men have
found him too strong for their taste.
Ulysses Simpson
DASTARDLY Grant Welt is the
CRIME. imposing cognomen
of a culprit who is
under arrest at Quinoy , Illinois ,
charged with having sent an infernal
machine through the mails. Press
reports give but a meagre description
of the hellish contrivance , but from
their statement that it was "malig
nant " "destructive " "
, , "highly
dangerous , ' ' etc. , many are convinced
that it .was nothing more nor less
than a copy of a certain explosive
journal , published upon the dry
strip whi < jh separates the shimmering
Flatto from the narrow winding
streamlet called Salt Creek.
When the Kaiser
WOOING. sent his preciou's
royal brother into
this savage wilderness , we wore
suspicious ; when ho christened one
of the Gorman vessels "The Alice
Roosevelt , ' ' wo wore nearly satisfied ;
now that ho has slapped an Ameri
can officer on the back and called
him "Bill" doubt has been dispelled.
The Black Eagle is Certainly court
ing , gallantly , persistently courting
the Bald Eagle. If , instead of slap
ping this officer upon the back , lie
had prodded him in the ribs ; and
if , instead' of plain "Bill , " he had
addressed him as "Billy old Boy ! "
America would ore now have asked
to be annexed to Germany , just for
the privilege of being ruled by a
really and truly democratic sovereign.
Atlanta levied
UNFAIR. a tax to support
the library
which Andrew Carnegie presented to
the city. Negroes , of course , paid
their share of this tax , but are not
permitted to enjoy the benefits and
pleasures of the institution. " The
question is , how long will it take to
educate Atlanta's portion of the
white man's burden if the black is to
be taxed for the benefit of the white
man , and denied access to the means
of improving his mind ? Without
entering into the vexing race ques
tion , which , it must be admitted is
better understood in the South than
in the North , it appears that if the
color line is to be drawn by the libra
rian , it should be no less faithfully
observed by the assessor , and tax
collector.
Grovenor , of Ohio ,
NOTABLE one of the first to
CONVERT. follow McKiuley in
to the tariff maze ,
was also close upon the heels of the
illustrious exponent of protection ,
when the latter came put of that
maze , just before his lamented death.
Mr. Grovenor says he never has con
sidered the tariff ' ' a fetich not to be
touched or examined. " The republi
can party stood for a principle , not
for a schedule , and many notable
leaders are beginning to see that
an obstinate adherence to the rates
which never can be fixed permanently
will make trouble for candidates at
the coming congressional election.
Groveuor , the party's soothsayer ,
seems to lead the van of the proces
sion of republicans who are marching
away from the temple of their little
wooden god protection. The pace is
slow , and there are frequent halts
for consultation , but slow procress
is better than no progress , and there
is every reason to hope that tariff
idolatry will soon bo an unpopular
ceremony.
An editor whose
SOMEWHAT name will' not bo
MIXED. mentioned , because
readers would bo
none the wiser if it was , volunteers
the startling statement that The
Conservative has been slandering
Colonel Bryan , and remarks that "it
is a good tiling for Morton that he
does not live in some good , moral
community that wo know of , or he
would get tar and feathers just as
often as his Conservative made its
appearance. ' ' You will note that
at the head of these columns appears
the statement : "Terms of subscrip
tion one dollar and a half per year ,
iii advance. ' ' This signifies that The
Conservative does business upon a
cash basis only , and as we have
already refused to accept cobs , coon
skins , cord wood and pumpkins in
payment of subscriptions , we could
not consistently exchange The Con
servative even for marketable mer
chandise such as tar and feathers.
Not even the joys of living in a
"good , moral community" and
standing upon a par with ' ' the great
champion of human liberty" as this
editor calls him , would recompense
The Conservative for the loss of the
liberty of expressing its sincere be
liefs upon public issues and public
characters , and incidentally the right
to choose its own medium of exchange
in settling with subscribers.
Eugene F. Ware ,
DESERVED the new commis-
RECOGNITION. sioiier of pensions ,
provided he is will
ing to accept the position , is 61 years
of age , has an army record of five
years and more of faithful service to
his country , was admitted to the bar
in 1871 , served five years in the Kan
sas senate , has twice been delegate to
republican national conventions ,
and has been prominently identified
with the interests of this state , being
frequently retained to assist the at
torney general in try ing important
cases for the state.
Mr. Ware , as "Iron Quill" has
written many poems of merit. "It
hurts a lawyer to have it known that
he beats his wife ' '
, or writes poetry ,
is the reason he gives for having as
sumed the nom de plume.
Being soldier , lawyer and states
man combined , there is good reason
to expect much of him as commis
sioner of pensions , and those who
have watched the development of
his character , and know his moral
integrity , industry and sturdy inde
pendence of thought and action , con
gratulate the president and the
country , upon the selection of this
remarkable man. Deserving veterans
will find in him a friend and com
rade ; they can ask no more. Un
worthy applicants and bogus veterans
will find him at his post and with
his eyes open ; they can expect
nothing at his hands.