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Che Conservative
VOL. i. NEBRASKA CITY , NEB. , THURSDAY , MAY n , 1899. NO. 44.
WEEKLY.
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AN ANCIENT
FIATIST. deville , aii Eng
lish knight of the
14th century , who spent a large part of
his life in traveling through Africa and
Asia , and in the course of his wanderings -
ings saw as many things that did not
exist as any traveler either before or
after him , took pains when he came to
the Great Khan's territories to investi
gate the source of that monarch's fab
ulous wealth ; and he found it to con
sist in his use of an irredeemable paper
currency.
"This Emporour may dispenden als
moche as he wile , " says Sir John , "with
outen estymacion. For he despendeth
not ne makothe no Money , but of
Lether emprented , or of Papyre. And
of that Moneye , is some of gretter Prys ,
nnd som of lasse prys , aftre the dyver-
sitee of his Statutes. And when that
Money hath ronne so longe , that it be-
gynnethe to waste , than men beren it to
the Emperoures Tresorye : and than
they taken newe Money for the Olde.
And that Money gothe thorghe out alle
the contree and thorghe out alle
his Provynces. For there and beyonde
hem , thei make no Money nouther of
Gold nor of Sylver.And therfor he
may despende enow , and outrageously. "
That is the trouble to this day ; when
men discover that easy method of creat
ing value out of the valueless , they be
gin to dispenden outrageously. Sir
John records some of the ways this
Oriental potentate devised to squander
his revenues ; he had Rubyes and Ghar-
boncles of half a f ote long ; he main
tained 200 Phisioyeus and 210 Leches ;
he had his barn full of Olifauiitx , tame
and othere , Babowyues , Apes and othere
dyverse Bestes ; and so many wylde
Gees and Gaudres and wylde Dokes and
Swannes and Heirouns that they were
not to be counted.
CARLISLE ANI > HEED.
Two of the ablest men who have ever
served in the American house of repre
sentatives and the two men who with
pre-eminent ability presided over its de
liberations are John G. Carlisle and
Thomas B. Reed. They have both re
tired from public life. Neither of them
was ever an office-seeker. They are
good lawyers.
Mr. Carlisle is especially gifted in
memory and in the power of analytical
reasoning. He can quote literally , word
for word , more court decisions than any
other man in the United States. He can
expose a sophism and dissect a fallacy so
skilfully and with such clearness that
the dullest can comprehend the error
and discern the truth.
Mr. Reed , like Mr. Carlisle , is pecul
iarly strong in his individuality and not
commonplace in anything. Neither of
these eminent citizens has ever been
charged with or suspected of corruption
in all their long and luminous careers.
Nor has anyone ever , even by implica
tion , suggested that they are lacking in
the highest and best characteristics of
statesmanship.
Carlisle and Reed are now residents
of the city and state of New York.
Either one of them would make a good ,
conservative candidate for the presi
dency. Mr. Carlisle would no doubt be
ably supported under present political
conditions , no matter by whom nomin
ated , by Mr. Thomas B. Reed ; and the
latter , if named for the presidency ,
would count John G. Carlisle among his
ardent advocates. These men are pat
riots. They love their country more
than party.
About the last
TASTE. . . , , , .
joke made by the
poet Heine was his answer to the phys
ician who attended him on his death
bed , when he asked him what land of a
taste he had , meaning in his mouth.
Heine replied that he had bad taste , like
all Germans.
This was merely a characteristic wit
ticism , designed to please the French ,
among whom he spent his last days. It
is by no means certain that the Ger
mans have poorer taste than other na
tions. The taste of a good many Ger-
mnns , for one thing , has led them to
throw in their lot with that of the
American republic.
And if one wns looking for bad taste ,
it would be hard to find a bettor exam
ple than the verses recited by Captain
Coghlau , of the United States navy , at
a recent banquet of the Union League
Club.
These were a set of bumptious and
impudent rhymes directed at Emperor
William of Germany , reprosentiug him
as boasting , in low-comedian dialect ,
what "Me und Gott" could do if they
tried. They are offensive enough to
displease anybody , and funny enough
to make anyone laugh ; but there is
apparently no more sense to them than
to the humor the Spanish indulged in
last year at the expense of Yankee Pigs.
Captain Coghlan does not seem to be at
all responsible for them , as it is said
that they were constructed by an
Englishman resident in Manila , and to
have been recited on this occasion at
the request of some of Coghlan's friends ,
who knew of their popularity in that
quarter of the world ; but both their
urgency and the captain's compliance ,
in so conspicuous an assemblage , were
certainly very much out of place.
° f
SPOKANE.
peculiar advant
ages of the English system of ortho
graphy , that the harder a man tries to
spell a word exactly according to its
sound , the more obscure does his inten
tion become. The following paragraph ,
from Rev. Samuel Parker's book , leaves
the reader entirely in the dark as to the
pronunciation of the word which the
writer no doubt thought he had fixed
with mathematical exactness :
"The name of this nation is generally
written Spokan , sometimes Spokane. I
called them Spokans , but they corrected
my pronunciation , and said Spokein , and
this they repeated several times , until I
was convinced that to give their name a
correct pronunciation it should be written -
ton Spokeiii. "
This Parker was a missionary who
made the journey from the Missouri
river to Oregon and the coast in 1835 , or
seven years before Fremont , the Path
finder , set his foot upon the plains. He
also accompanied Marcus Whitman ,
who , on his second trip across with his
caravan of Oregon settlers , made the
path that Fremont found.
