Route No. 3.
Joe Coupons, third son of Mr. and
Mrs. Peter Coupons, is very low with ap
pendicitis. The wind of Sunday played havoc
with the wimlmiil at the home of Fred
Beblen, jr.
Mi8 Louise Seefeid is now ut, the
home of Mr. und Mra. Win. Kruiulaud
in Columbus.
Peter LutjenB shipped u car of hogs
to South Omaha Tuesdu. loading them
ut Platte Center.
Herman SunnJers is toj-mrnius in
Pueblo, Cd., und we understand that if
the country suits huu and he can rind
a desirable locntiou, he will make his
home then.
Monday Peter rich mi it's mule team
took a spin around the (dock in Coluui
bus, starting nenr the E'evator Boiler
Mills. No damage was cue, except to
the express wagon tbey 6truck.
Marriage Licenses.
Wm. Ros Urimes, Cirke, Neb 24
Lena Carolina Boettcucr, Columbus. -2
llenry lioL-ttcher, Columbus -16
Lizzie Lunsford, Omaha tf'J
Burton .Mount, Columbus '52
Qrace L Flemmuig, Columbus !4
Quetave Hoeseel, Creston 21)
Maragret M. Liittlemann, Creston.. 12-'
Henry L Schult, Uellwood J3
Sarah L Styer, Ht-llwood 21
Andrew Lcgler, Schuyler 23
Minnie Schroeder, Sehuyler 20
Mostly Sound and Fury.
His honor. Judge Samuel D. Wad
dy. K. C. who ended liis life as a
county court judge, was a noncon
formist and a preacher. When he had
preached his first sermon. E. E.
Crispe, the author of "Reminiscences
of a K. C." says he returned to the
paternal home hoping to receive his
father's congratulations.
At the midday meal there was an
ominous silence. This the young man
at last broke by appealing "Father!"
"Yes. Samuel," said the good man
thus appealed to. "I have heard your
sermon. There was not much theol
ogy In it."
"No. father."
"Nor was there much divlnitv."
"No. father."
"Nor description of Biblical char
acter." "No. father."
"Nor explanation of difficult
lems."
prot
"No. father."
"Not much expounding."
"No. father."
"Well, Sam." said the father, with
mild irony, "don't you think there
ought to have been something in It?"
Toronto Mail and Empire.
Be Optimistic.
There Is much in the past which we
suggest ought to encourage us to face
the unknown future hopefully and con
fidently. The pessimists are very vo
cal in our midst, .-.ml they doubtless
play a useful part in reminding us of
our Imperfections, but none the less a
look backward recalls to us the line of
a well-known hymn: "Ye fearful saints,
fresh courage take." We hope we need
hardly say that we are not arguing for
any careless view or life or its respon
sibilities. We think thero is a real
need for an increased seriousness in
rertain sections of the community in
order that we may more nearly attain
the level of the ideal state in which
?ach of its members contributes some
thing to its service. Let us be anxious
about the future. Westminster Ga
zette. World's Greatest Oil Well.
The scene in the Potrero del Llano
dWrict, a few miles above here, where
the biggest oil wel! in the world has
bei active since January ::, lfln. can
not be adequately described. Imagine
a solid column of oil shooting to a
height of more- than four hundred and
fifty feet from a hole In the earth,
with a mist of minute globules car
ried by the wind for more than ten
miles settling down upon the vege
tation and forming pools of oil within
that radius: then a great lake of the
fluid four miles long by three miles
wide and formed by means of an
earthen dam hastily thrown across a
natural reservoir, and at the lowest
depression of the bank of this lake a
channel several feet wide leading into
the Tuxpan river, through which the
overflow of oil from the wonderful
geyser is constantly going to waste.
Tuxpaw (Mexico) Dispatch.
Valuable Knowledge.
"And these?" we asked, as w
were ushered into a room filled with
children deeply immersed in stud v.
"They are learning." said the prin
cipal, "the difference 'twixt tweedle
dum and tweedledec!"
We were not a little struck. "Rut
is the game." we objected, "worth the
candle?"
"Oh, entirely so!" rejoined the prin
cipal, "when they grow up th-v will
be able, with very little assistance
from the agent, to distinguish a car
of the current year's model from a
car of the year previous, thus to save
themselves much humiliation and loss
of social rating." Puck.
Like Moving Picture Shows.
Marionette or puppet theaters, for
merly well beloved by the Italian resi
dents from memories of their old
home, have disappeared in New York.
being replaced by the moving picture
shows, but the mythological and le
gendary dramas familiar in the van
ished playhouses are still preserved
and in more effective form by the
films of the biographs.
Rings Replace Straps.
A newly invented substitute for the
street car strap is a series of iron
rings, attached to a bar running the
length of the -car. Each ring is fas
tened with a spring, and returns to a
uniform position when the hand Is
withdrawn from it The rings are not
sightly, but their cleanliness attracts.
a polished white surface being kept
well scrubbed bj the transportation
companies which have adopted them.
STRANGE COURT TRIAL
CHIMPANZEE IS DEFENDANT
WEST AFRICAN TRIBUNAL.
IN
"John" Pleads Guilty to Having Stolen
Sweets and Is Sentenced to Three
Months' Confinement in
Prison.
The following strange incident is re
lated by Capt. George A. Briggs and
occurred during hie stay on the west
coast of Africa about ten years ago.
A chimpanzee named John, who was
owned by a high official, one day broke
from his chain and, strolling uncon
cernedly down the main thoroughfare,
scattered the crowds before him. A
native woman who was vending dain
ties dropped her tray and even for
getting her small child fled with the
crowd.
The chimpanzee soon spied the tray
of dainties and devoured them in a
most convincing manner. The child,
seeing all the sweets disappear, at
tacked the chimpanzee by the tail, but
a bite from the brute sent the child
yelling at the top of his lung power.
This so infuriated the natives that
they made a combined attack on John
and his lease of life would have been
cut short had not his owner appeared.
He faced the crowd and assured them
that every man would bo tendered his
due. For a similar offense he in
quired whether a man would not have
to stand his trial in court.
"Yah! Yah!" was the shout.
"Then," said John's owner, "let the
woman appear in court tomorrow with
the child and all the witnesses and
I promise you John will be there liko
a man to stand trial and take what
ever punishment may be doled out to
him."
lite next morning the court was
crowt cd when John appeared, chained
a:l arried by several policemen. He
vrs placed in the dock and the charge
of larceny .uid assault was read to
him.
His master turned to him and. ask
ing him if he hail any defense to of
fer, was answered by the usual grunts
of delight that John indulged in when
ever his iiiastc greeted him.
The master iLen informed the judge
that John had pleaded guilty and had
no defense to offer. The judge, after
due deliberation, sentenced the brute
to three months and he was led away
to prison, where he served his sen
tence.
Host's Patience Worn Cut.
Alfred Gwynne Vanderbilt. at a
luncheon at the New York Yacht club,
told a story about a very rich and very
proud Hostonian.
"He used to visit me with his fam
ily," said Mr. Vanderbilt, "and, in his
pride, he always brought a host of ser
vants with him. Naturally, it was
rather a tax on one's room.
"Hut one Thanksgiving he must have
felt prouder than ever. He swooped
down on my farm with valet and
chauffeur a regular army. I was rath
er put to it to house that multitude,
but I said noih.ug till dessert came on
at dinner. Then I shouted across the
table in a loud, hearty voice:
"1 say. Endicott. I hope your un-
dergardener is better.'
" 'My undcrgardener? What do you
mean?" ho asked in astonishment. 'So
far as I know, the man's not even
i!!.'
" "Oh. I thought he must be," said
I, "or you'd have brought him along.'
A Versatile Model.
George W. Perkins, the retiring part
ner of the famous hanking house of
J. P. Morgan Co., was giving advice
to young men.
"Never undertake." he said, to do
too much. In applying for a position
It is almost better to promise too
little than too much. Remember the
model.
"An old -hap. you know, applied to
a New York artist for the post of
model.
" "Well," said the artist, 'what do you
sit for?'
'"Oli anything, sir." said the model,
fingering his gray beard nervously.
'Anything you like, sir. Landscape, If
necessary. "
"Dry" Warships.
The Mritish navy lias just taken a
step unprecedented in its history. The
two cruisers- Rainbow and Niobe are
to be teetotal men o' war, contrary
to all marine traditions. Grog lias al
ways been a part of the standard ra
tion, being a concoction of one part
rum to three parts water: but no such
luxury is to be permitted on the two
ships above mentioned. In the old
days in fact down to 1SH0 the daily
allowance to each man was a gallon
of ale and a half pint of rum. The
quantity has been greatly modified,
but it certainly never entered any
tar's head that the time was coming
for total abstinence.
Willing to Learn.
"'Did you know that man was trying
to sell you a gold brick?" said the agi
tated friend.
'Yep.'" replied Farmer Corntossel.
"Then why did you listen to him?"
".Tes" wanted to see how the thing
was done in case I want to go into the
business.
Flight of Time.
"What is this young man doing
asleep in our parlor with cobwebs all
over him?"
"Never mind, father. He's waiting
for daughter to dress."
Reed's Sarcasm.
Senator Lodge. In the Century Mag-
w....c. oa..o. u loot i recau comin.-;
across Thomas B. Reed one day in
State street just after the nomination
of Mr. Blaine. The break In the Re
publican party had begun, andl-asked
Mr. Reed what he thought of the out
look. 'Well.' he said, 'it Is a great
comfort to think that' the wicked poli
ticians were not allowed to pick the
candidates, and that the nomination
was made by the people. The poli
ticians would have been guided only
by a base desire to win.' " l
HANDLING LONDON'S LETTERS
Some Idea of the Big Force Require
In the Greet Poet
Office.
Sir Henry Tanner, principal archi
tect In his majesty's office of works,
gave an address before the Royal in
stitute of British Architects in Lon
don recently, describing In detail the
new general post office to be known
as King Edward's building.
As giving some idea of the magni
tude of the work there, he mentioned
that the removal of provincial mails
and of the parcels of Mount Pleasant
railroad to the main building required
700 of the force of 2,850 men,
leaving only 2,150 in the old build
ing, but there were at the date
of removal to King Edward's building
3,750 of all ranks, including 1,400
postmen. Meanwhile the force at
Mount Pleasant had increased from
2,850 to 4.550. These numbers were
exclusive of the temporary force em
ployed at Christmas.
The work dealt with per week was
as follows. Five and a half millions
of letters, etc., delivered in E. C.
district, and 3.500.000 to other dis
tricts of London and by certain provin
cial mails, and 3.500.000 dispatched to
foreign countries and the colonies:
in all, 12,500,000. weighing about 366
tons.
With regard to the cost of the new
building he found that if built in the
ordinary way with steel construction
the approximate cost, exclusive of fit
tings, etc.. would be 355,000. but if
in reinforced concrete 295.000 would
probably suffice. The latter figure
had proved to be correct, so that
there had been an approximate sav
ing of 60,000. and, apart from this,
considerable space had been gained
by the great reduction In wall thick
nesses. The general post office has fur
nished statistics of the Yuletide traf
fic, showing that all records were ex
ceeded in the huge 1910 Christmas
"post bag." The great office is
eqttipped with the very latest appli
ances, and all were working up to
their fullest capacity during Christ
mas week. To suit the great length
of the building electric "conveyers"
have been installed. A new and in
genious system for sorting newspa
pers was also successfully tried.
MUST WEAR DARK CLOTHES
An Absolute Requirement in Factories
Where Work Is Done With
Gold.
Light suits of clothes are not favor
ed in factories where work Is done on
gold. In fact, in many such factories
a dark suit of clothes is absolutely re
quired and even a light waistcoat may
lose a man a job. The reason for this
Is that any stray grains of gold that
may get on the clothing can easily be
raught on a dark suit, while they might
get away from the establishment if
light clothes were worn.
That such a rule was enforced
among gold workers one man learned
recently when a Bohemian gold beater
applied to him for a helping hand. The
Hohemian said that he had only re
-entry come to this country, that he
had had a chance to obtain a good job
9t his trade, but that the place had
been refused him because he turned up
with a light coat and waistcoat on.
and they were the only clothes he
had.
The man whom he approached was
struck by the story and offered to help
him out if it proved true. He went to
a down town factory with him and
round out that the man could have the
job if he presented himself within an
bour with the proper clothes on. Two
1 dollars enabled the man to rig himself
out in the dark coat and waistcoat to
go with ins dark trousers, and sure
enough he got the job.
"You may think this strange." said
the man at the factory, "but it means
quite a little to us. Every man's
rlothing is carefully examined when he
leaves here at night, and the gold
brushed off whenever we see any on
bis clothing.
"It is impossible to hide even tiny
grains on a dark background, but take
a mixed or a light suit, and we might
easily lose quite mi amount of gold,
and gold isn't anything you want to
lose, even In small quantities."
Chicken Bones for Children.
.Monday morning marketers learned
through a sign in the delicatessen store
window that the proprietor had choice
chicken bones for sale.
"For soup?" some one asked.
"No; babies." he said. "It Is not easy
to find a nutritious bone for the baby
to gnaw. What he wants is a drum
stick of a young. Juicy "fowl, it must
be fresh and free from tang. Even the
family that prides itself on setting a
good table may buy a chicken whose
drumstick is too old for the child.
Every Saturday I cook wholesome celery-fed
roasters. Their bones, when
stripped, make excellent tooth sharpen
ers for the babies, and any mother of a
fretful brood can have them for next to
nothing."
Our Doctors.
"The late Count Tolstoi loathed phy
sicians." said, at a dinner in Washing
ton, a Russian diplomat.
"You remember how Tolstoi ridiculed
physicians in 'War and Peace?' Well,
I heard him ridicule three of them to
their faces over a vegetarian dinner at
Yasnaya Polyana.
" 'Physicians.' he said, bitterly, look
ing up from a plate of lentils, 'may be
divided into two classes the radicals,
who kill ycu. and the conservatives,
who let you die."
saw - """
Woman Suffrage Advocate.
Miss Marjorie Johnson is giving a
course of lectures In Philadelphia. She
is one of the young college women
connected with the Henry Street Set
tlement House of New York. She wa;
chosen by the Consumers league of
Ne York to investigate the condi
tions of factory and mill operators.
and while investigating them worked'
In several mills and factories. In her
lectures in Philadelphia Miss Johnson
contends that women in industrial oc
cupations need the ballot more than
any other class.
WHILE WIFE WAS AWAY
LONE MAN'S EXPERIENCE WITH
BAKING OF A CAKE.
Recipe In the Women's Home Guide
Was Simple Enough, but the Re
sult Was Far From Sat
isfactory. "I think it said a slow oven," said
the man. He knelt on the spattered
kitchen floor and peeped into the
oven. "What'n thunder's a slow oven,
anyway?"
As he looked within, the oven began
a curious movement, and he watched it
fascinated.
Something in a square pan had been
ballooning out several inches, and even
as he looked ,it began to recede, even
as a bubble grows smaller when a
child cautiously removes a finger
from the spool with which it is
blown.
"Huh!" said the man; "that's
funny." Then it occurred to him that
a draft of cold air had struck his cake,
causing it to fall, and he hurriedly
slammed the oven door and heaped
wood on the fire in order that it rise
again.
It is not necessary to say the man
was alone. It might be well to say,
however, that his womankind had
gone off on a visit, and lest some
think him insane, to state that he had
been reading recipes in the Women's
Home Guide until his tongue hung
out
The Home Guide was explicit in say
ing that such a cake was easy to
make, and the man, searching the
kitchen, found all the ingredients.
The temptatoin was too great, and
he began making a cake.
It should have been a good cake,
for he had been very careful. True,
he couldn't remember the difference
between a tablespoon and a teaspoon
ful until he had put three tablespoon
fuls of baking powder in heaping
spoonfuls but, as everybody knows,
that should mako the cake lighter.
One of the eggs looked a hit pale
and washed out, and he rejected that,
using only two. and he had added a lit
tle sugar to the quantity, because he
liked cake sweet. But, generally speak
ing, he had made the cake according to
directions.
He cautiously opened the open again,
and with a cloth jerked the cake out
and slammed it on the table. Then
he stood back and looked at it. Some
thing was wrong, that was certain.
It was of a curious dun color, and
had a great bulge in the middle, while
all about the bulge was a .lip like a
surrounding valley. Also the edges
were not dun color, but black. The
bottom also was black, though much of
the black stuck to the pan.
Then the man tasted his cake. Yes.
something was wrong. It was soft as
library paste and guiuniv bevond be
lief. The man did not hesitate. He open
ed the back door and cast the cake
into outer darkness, and with diligence
began washing up the dishes, for
there were dishes that seemed to in
dicate that he had been trying to mako
a cake, and the folks would lie back
in the morning.
And, when all was clean, he lighted
his pipe and took up a magazine.
Cake? Not much. He never wanted
to see a cake again.
The Magazine was not the Women's
Home Guide. Qalveston News.
Didn't Think Bride Necessary.
"A queer thing happened here re
cently." said Lawyer Nathan G. Fos
ter. "A few weeks ago a fellow and
girl came here ami asked me to marry
them. They did not know that a li
cense was required, so I went with
them to the clerk's office and they ar
ranged the matter. I told them to
come back at a stated time and I
would marry them.
"The day designated the fellow
came alone and said he was all ready
to be married. 'Where's the young
lady?' I asked. 'Why.' replied the fel
low, "has she got to come, too?' The
fellow thought it queer that I could
not perform the ceremony unless the
lady was present, but went out and
soon returned with her." Rumford
Times.
Waste of Meat Through Tuberculosis.
Tuberculosis in hops was offered as
one of the causes of the increased cost
of living in an address by Dr. Ilurton
R. Rogers before the convention of the
American Association for the Advance
ment of Science.
Doctor Rogers said that of the .10.
472,921 hogs killed at fnltcd States
packing houses in JftrtO the govern
ment inspectors found S2G.S4S affected
with tuberculosis. This he said was
130,802 more than in IMS.
He said that during the last ten
years 2.fi4S."i20 tuberculosis hogs and
212.340 tuberculosis rows had been
found. This, lie said, decreased tho
meat supply and increased the cost of
living.
Almost Escaped.
John IL Morron. the president of a
great cement company, was praising
cement at the New York Cement show.
"It is the fashion now, too," he said.
"It is as much the fashion as the new
fangled decollete gown from -Paris.
There will probably be the same diffi
culty about it.
"One man said to another at a ball
the other night:
"Do you have any trouble keeping
your wife in clothes?
"'Rather!' the other answered.
'Haven't you noticed the new French
decollette srown she's wearing? "
Pearls in Cocoanuts.
Few people know that the cocoanuts
of the Malay peninsula sometimes pro
duce pearls that are highly prized by
the natives. The stones are not unliko
the pnarls of the muliusks and are
cimilar in composition to tho oyster
pearls, having calcium carbonate and
a little organic matter These concre
tions form jsst beneath the stem, and
a pure white pearl brings a high price,
as it is supposed by the natives to pos
sess some kind of a charm. Cases
have been known where the cocoanut
pearl has been sold as a mollusk prod
uct, but suqh instances are rare.
DEE0ED HIS LAND TO GOD;
Unique Instrument Made by Richard
A. George of North Attleboro le
Filed With the Regietrar.
A unique instrument was filed re
cently with the Taunton registrar of
deeds by Richard. A. George of North
Attloboro, in which a tract of land in
New Boston, a suburb of North Attle
boro, was conveyed to the Lord of
Hosts.
So far as known it was the first
instrument filed In New England mak
ing such a conveyance.
In the deed the Lord is named as
the grantee and the representatives
of the Lord in the transaction were
Charles Carpenter, E. S. Barstow and
A. H. Jamison, all of North Attleboro,
who are described in the paper as be
ing trustees of the Christian Work
ers' union. The grantor was Richard
A. George.
The deed is couched in the ordinary
legal expression and declares that
"Richard A. George of North Attle
boro, In consideration of $1 and other
valuable considerations paid by the
Lord, represented by Charles Carpen
ter. E. S. Barstow and A. H. Jamison,
trustees of the Christian workers'
union of North Attleboro, the receipt
of which is hereby acknowledged,
does hereby give, grant, bargain, etc.,
unto the said Lord and representa
tives, a certain lot of land situated in
North Attleboro. on the New Boston
road. Then follows in tne deed a
more particular description of the
property.
The land was purchased in 1904 by
the Christian Workers' union of North
Attleboro, but the instrument setting
forth the transfer was not presented
to be recorded until the past week.
It is supposed that the matter of
tax assessments will havo to be borne
by tho trustees of the Christian Work
ers union unless some special exemp
tion from taxation is secured. This
will bo determined later.
New Boston is a small village some
threo miles from North Attleboro, on
the road to Foxboro. A number of
years ago some of the villagers
formed a religious society, and meet
ings have since been held by the 2."
or HO members. The body took the
name of the Christian Workers'
union.
In 1001 the society decided to erect
a small structure as a place of
worship. The land was purchased of
Richard, A. George, one of tho mem
bers, and he deeded the property to
the creator, naming as temporary,
custodians the trustees of the union.
Mr. George, the grantor of the
unique instrument, is a jeweler by
trade and is employed at Attleboro
Falls.
Her French.
Winthrop Ames, at the New thea
ter's anniversary dinner in New York
said with a laugh:
"At the New theater we try to be
cosmopolitan. In setting a London
scene, for example, we wouldn't make
the dome of St. Paul's visible across
the river from the terrace of th Sa
voy. "That sort of thing happens, you
know, in New York. It rather shows
us up. It is rather amusing like the
French of the consul's wife.
"I was lunching once in a town in
the Midi with the consul and his good
lady. Mrs. Consul all through the meal
had a good deal of difficulty in making
herself understood by her French wait
ing maid. When the dessert was
brought on. she turned to the maid and
said, in an angry aside:
" 'Not these couteaux. Bring me the
couteaux with the ivory handles.'
"Then she turned to us and added,
thumping her fist on the table, while
the maid stood mystified:
"D the language! I wish I'd
never learnt it.' "
Turks Must Study German.
Germany has gained a diplomatic
victory, the consequences of which
can hardly be foretold, in persuading
the Turkish government to make the
study of the German language oblig
atory in all the elementary schools of
the Ottoman empire.
Practical and far-seeing Germans
long ago realized that the spread of
tho German language is one of the
best methods of promoting German
trade interests in distant parts of the
world, and the German government
has always given its support 'to the
foundation of German schools in over
sea countries.
In recent years great, efforts have
been made to establish the German
schools in China. Persia and many
other countries In which Germany has
commercial ambitions. New York
Tribune.
Granite of the South.
When one speaks of granite the
mind naturally reverts tn Vermont. It
Is difficult to associate granite with any
section of North America outside New
England, yet It must now be acknowl
edged to the credit of the south that
Georgia, Nortii Carolina. Maryland and
Virginia arc producing large quantities
of stone of good quality which insures
the south a place in the.market at any
rate.
The annual output is now worth
about $3,500,000 and the industry Js
growing. It may be of comparative
interest to know that New England's
output Is about $9,000,000 worth of
stone annually.
The Negotiations.
"Did Lord Luvous propose for your
daughter's hand?"
"No," replied Mr. Cumrox. "But he
gave me to understand that he'd be
willing to consider bids from our fam
ily for the use of his ancestral name."
Another Gift of Mrs. Sage.
Mrs. Russell Sage has given $25,000
for a new rotunda of the city hall,
which has been accepted by tho muni
cipal art commission. Resolutions were
adopted thanking Mrs. Sage. An archi
tect has been appointed to draw up
plans and the work will soon begin.
The Best.
Willis What is the happiest mo
ment cf married life?
Gillis When a man throws tho pic
tures of his wife's relatives out of the
family album and fills it up with
photographs of his baby instead.
Puck.
JSIBsBBsBs p
Just Received Our New
Cadillac Torpedo
which is the best ear 6n the market today. The
Cadillac is noted for its easy riding qualities,
and is recognized the world over as superior to
any motor car manufactured. AH parts are
interchangeable. Undoubtedly it is the best car
ever brought to Columbus.
Call on us and let us show you thatt 1911 Cadil
lac Torpedo. You will certainlyDadmire it. It
is the classiest Torpedo car on the market today.
DISCHNER AUTO CO,
Corner 13th and M Streets
Golumbu, Nebraska
CAUGHT HIM WITH THE 600DS
How Gladys' Father Nailed Mr. Fick
leton Through One of the Tri
umphs of Science.
The girl's father met the young man
in the hall. The time was some
nights later. There was a peculiar
gleam of triumph in the elder man's
eye which the younger man was total
ly at a loss to fathom.
"You wish to speak with me before
Miss Gladys comes down?" said the
caller, repeating the words of the
other.
"I do. young man." replied tho
girl's father: "just step In the par
lor; I will not detain you more than
a few minutes. Doubtless you are
aware of the recent remarkable
strides of science."
"Er some of them."
"And doubtless you are familiar
with the amazing invention by which
it is possible to make a combination
x-ray photograph and moving picture
of a human being's brain."
"Hum I have read something of it.
I think. Very wonderful."
"Very wonderful, indeed. Well, tho
practical part of all this simply is that
last Saturday night when you were
here alone In the parlor with Gladys,
you sat directly In front of one ot
these truly wonderful machines. It
was in ambush behind the sofa, as it
were. You were er young people
call it holding hands. I have heard
and your conversation was most in
teresting. So was the record of emo
tion, unmistakable emotion, which
was coursing through your brain."
The young man gripped violently at
the sides of his chair.
"Here in my hand." the young wom
an's parent continued. "I hold a com
bination x-ray photograph and moving
picture of j-our thoughts and feelings
at that time. I would give them to
you gladly, only they are so precious
from a scientific standpoint that
hesitate to let them leave my person,
even for an instant. I that is.
Gladys mother and myself trust you
will have no occasion to alter your
mental pose, for really these are very,
very beautiful thoughts.
"Y?; I thought I could not be mis
taken. Here conies Gladys now.
Gladys, here is Mr. Fickleton."
Prooklyn Kngle.
Language for Each Sex.
If one of the difficulties of learning
Samoan is that each noble has a pri
vate dialect of his own, the difficulty is
matched by a linguistic complication
In certain other parts of Polynesia. In
the Gilbert islands the men and the
women speak literally a different Ian
guage. The difficulty of mutual inter
course is overcome by making the
women use the masculine tongue when
talking to the men. Among themselves
it is "tabu." And the men do not
trouble their heads about the other.
With some trouble you may find the
("ifferpuce between the men's and the
women's language in this civilized
FRESH BREAD SUE AS USUAL
Moving our building has not inter
fered with our business in the least.
We have leased an Eleventh street
oven and will be ready at all times
to lurnish our patrons with fresh
Bakery Goods while our new three
story building is being constructed
POESCH
"Thirty'
country. There are words that are un
derstood and used by every woman,
and not quite comprehended by a man
when he hears them accidentally. For
example, "shopping" is a woman's
word. And another which is not used
by men Is "nice." A man may bs
clever and rich and handsome, but
not "nice." You have heard the whis
per of the epithet In the feminine lan
guage. But the word is never used in
that Bense (which you know) by a
man.
Known by Their Back's.
To tho frivolous minded the dress
maker's fitting room suggested prepar
ations for an Anthony Comstock raid.
Even the adjustable wire forms repre
Renting women's figures were draped
in white sheets.
"We do that." said the dressmaker,
"at the request of the customers.
These figures belong to wosien who or
der so many clothes made that it pays
to keep forms permanently adjusted tc
their shape. The figures under thoss
sheet's are by no means perfect. Tbers
are stout figures that cannot be mad
to look slim and thin figures that will
not look stout; there are uneven shoul
ders and hips that won't match. Cus
tomers who know each other have ths
eye of a detective for recognising
shapes. Nine out of ten can pick out
the figure of an acquaintance.
" 'That looks like Mrs. Brown's hack.'
they say. I may He away Mrs. Brown's
identity, but you can't fool those wom
en. That is why most women want
their wire forms draped. Imperfections
that can be hidden by a well-fitting
dress look as big as a camel's hump in
a wire form." .
Teacher's Aim In Life.
To help a child to become unselfish.
self-reliant, kind, thoughtful, consid
erate, honest and independent; to
train to habits of usefulness; to pro
mote purity of thought and life; to
have even some small part In awaken
ing loftier purposes and holler aspi
rations; to arouse in the minds of
boys and girls an honest and sincere
hope to be able to some extent to
make happier the school, the home,
the community, the state, the nation,
and tho world should be the greatest
ambition of every teacher. Richard C.
Barrett.
Out of Babes' Mouth.
Mrs. Philip Snowden. the English
suffragette, began, at a dinner in New
York, her reply to a toast on "mar
riago." with the words:
"I once asked a little girl if she
knew what leisure was.
" 'Yes.' she replied. 'Leisure is the
place where married people repent."
A Simple Request.
"What are you going to tell the peo
ple when you got home?"
"Nothing." replied Senator Sor
ghum. "And all that I ask is that
they'll reciprocate and not start In
telling me things."
v