Nebraska Newspapers

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WEDHE8DAY. FEBBUABY 1, 1911.
8TROTHKB & COMPANY. Proprietors.
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to fie their old aa well aa their mew addreaa.
The studied effort on the part of the
World-Herald and other democratic
newspapers to push Bryan into the
background is attracting attention out
side of Nebraska. Here is what the
Sioux City Tribune rises to remark
about it: "What sort of mischievous
purpose is it and where does it come
from, this, denying of Mr. Bryan by
the Nebraska democrats? They are
playing for a fall, these democratic
newspapers and politicians, who are
trying to build up the Nebraska demo
cracy around organized opposition to
Mr. Bryan. It won't work. It is not
a question of Bryan's presidential as
pirations, if he has any. It's a ques
tion of the integrity of the democratic
party at this time. Is the party hon
est? Is it intending to follow the pro
gressive trend that Mr. Bryan's leader
ship gave to it, or is this anti-Bryau
move engineered by the corporation
influence that want to be in with de
mocracy in 11)12?" Lincoln Newe.
With the sufferings of our federal
circuit judges on their miserable pit
tance of $7,000 a year we can all
sympathize. Most of us know what it
is to be poor. We were poor ourselves
once, and know just how hard it is to
maintain a $10,000 family and a
$6,000 automobile on wages of $583.33
a month. Nevertheless, the refusal of
the house of representatives to increase
this stipend to $10,000 a year is likely
to meet the approval of all of us.
Unfortunately there are not wages
enough in existence to give each of us
all he would like to have. Where
there is money to spend in wage
increases, therefore, we are compelled
to consider supply and demand. When
a circuit court vacancy was in this
vicinity a few days ago it did not go
begging, not by a big margin. Many
applied, and Walter I. Smith was
accounted a lucky man when he got
it. Meanwhile some thousands of jobs
at Chicago sewing machines go beg
ging because girls have refused to sew
at $7 a week. We need clothes
almost as badly as we need justice.
Men were snapping at the poorly paid
judgeship. Why should we not take
the extra wages, then, to lure the girls
back to the deserted sewing machines?
This is what we do when we refuse to
raise the judge's salary, for all these
government expenses the "ultimate
consumer" pays. Lincoln Journal.
SIMPLIFYING COURT METHODS.
Senator Klihu Root, in the capacity
of president of the New York State
liar association, has called the atten
tion of that body- to the time wasted in
the restating by judges of established
legal opinions in new forms. He con
demns this practice and asserts that
the briefest possible opinion from the
bench usually serves the purpose quite
as well as an opinion of interminable
length. He also favors a statutory
rule which would preclude reversal of
a judgment upon the error of ruling
relative to the admission or rejection
of evidence in a trial unless it appears
that a different ruling would have led
to a different 'judgment He declares
that such a rule would put an end to
the countless objections and exceptions
which now disfigure legal procedure.
No doubt these two changes in me
thods would help considerably. The
average layman, however, does no)
care how the legal fraternity reforms
itself provided it does so at the earliest
opportunity. He wants removed the
snares and pitfalls which tangle his
feet when he goes to law and which
make legal redress appear outrageous
ly difficult of attainment. He would
like to see abolished the garrulity of
the law which seems to create an im
penetrable fog for all save the lawyers
themselves and frequently for them,
if indications count for anything.
la short, the average layman and
all the rest of the public will welcome
anything and everything which tends
to simplify and make more plain the
processes of the law, so that exact and
evea justice may be dealt out more
certainly and more speedily. Chicago
News.
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A GREAT INVENTION.
A London periodical pbblifthed am
account of a newly invented machine
which measures the character of an
individual with perfect accuracy. It
tells whether his thought processes are
clear or his morals muddy. Of course
there is always to be borne in mind
the first paragraph in the rabbit pie
recipe, which relates to the imperative
importance of catching your rabbit.
Many persons conscious of a decidedly
bad character and under no obligation
to be examined, might shy at investiga
tion. But the machine should prove
of great value in both politics and
business. It is possible to arrive at
conclusions as to whether the subject
under investigation is a person who
has fixed ideas founded on sentiment
rather than reason, as, for illustration,
a vegetarian or an anti-vaccinator.
The difference between an unconfined
lunatic and a sane man can be at once
discovered. There appears to be no
difficulty in distinguishing between a
pillar of a church and a looter of trust
estates even when, as it often happens,
the two are corporeally one.
When the marvelous mechanical
device is put upon the market we shall
no longer have to listen to the stump
speaker who challenges his basket cal
umniator to show that he has ever
committed an evil act or harbored the
slightest affection for a career of tur
pitude. We shall measure up all ap
plicants for appointive office and as
piration for elective office, and put the
lid upon the ambitions of those who are
proven to le fellows of the baser sort
and fall into the class composed of
horse thieves, burglars, short change
men, footpads and other pariahs.
This should greatly simplify our poli
tical problems. Something of the kind
has been long and urgently needed.
We have had enough of political ma
chines. Now for a machine to meas
ure the politician aud brand him pat
riot or pilferer as the case may be!
It will also save no end of money
for the trusting depositor to strap down
the bank officers and turn the machine
loose upon them, cranked up for an
exhaustive and candid report The
failure of the expert accountant to find
the thief before his picture and the es
timate of his peculations have appeared
on the front pages of the newspapers
is notorious. The tragical results of
the inability of their tribe to find out
anything till after the wreck of the
bank have been felt in countless homes,
and observed universally. The character-reading
machine should tell at
once whether the cashier is speculating
in stock with the funds of the innocents
or thinking of retiring from business
informally with the major portion of
the portable contents of the vault
And consider the great benefit to
municipal treasuries and city taxpay
ers when the machine with the "X"
ray powers of discernment can be
turned upon the members of the mu
nicipal legislative body to ascertain
whether they are more interested in
civic welfare or jackpots and whether
they look upon their offices as public
trusts or private snaps.
The story of the invention sounds a
good deal too good to be true, but truth
is often stranger than fiction. Upon
rare occasions it is even more pleas
ing. Louisville Courier-Journal.
HOW FARES ROOSEVELT?
Roosevelt's candidate was beaten in
New York, but the verdict is by no
means the overwhelming and obliter
ating one his enemies prayed for or
the New York newspaper headlines
and cartoons indicate. A defeat of
68,000 in New York state is not any
where near the beating the popular
David B. Hill received at the hands
of the colorless, old Levi P. Morton in
1894, when post-tariff conditions were
much the same as now and the drift
was against the democrats as it is today
against the republicans. .When one
considers the enormous massing of
money and newspapers against Stimson
and Roosevelt it is to be wondered at
that the Dix victory was not much
larger, especially in the city. Coler
there in 1902 got a plurality about ten
thousand larger, although he had no
such elements of support in his favor
and it was a republican year. So far
as "up state" is concerned the results
show as our newspaper forecast pre
dicted last year. There was no land
slide, no overwhelming rebuke to
Roosevelt, but a defeat which hurt
him sore and shows that even he can
not understand the force of a nation
wide movement Wilson's 25,000 vic
tory in New Jersey, Foes 32,000
plurality in Massachusetts, and the
election of democratic congressmen in
Chicago are much more emphatic con
demnations of the republican leaders
in that region than is the sixty-eight
thousand Dix victory in New York.
Nor is the republican loss in the states
in which Roosevelt spoke any serious
indication of a slap at him. We know
he cost Draper votes in Massachusetts,
but not to any considerable amount
It may be remembered that after the
campaign of 1890 Tom Reed figured
that in every congressional district in '
wBich he spoken-aid he journeyed far
into the west the republican candi
date lost. Yet no one' said that Reed
did it BooMVelt is certainly, not
banished into a cave by the New York
result Undoubtedly he has lost pres
tige bj his intemperate utterances and
needle attacks on the stump, which
his warmest friends regret, but the re
publican party has need of him and
will have still more need of him in
healing the wounds of today and pre
paring for success in 1912. Boston
Transcript
A BAR TO UNITY.
The agreement of the committees
upon a plan for the unification of the
Methodist church, the Methodist
Church South and the Methodist Pro
testant churches is expected to result
eventually in the merging of these
bodies, but it is a mistake to assume
that the change can be brought about
by a simple resolution when the gen
eral committee meets in Chattanooga
next May. There are practical as
well as sentimental difficulties in the
way. Perhaps all the committee can
do is to sweep away the physical ob
stacles and then allow the churches to
grow together if they are so minded
during the coming generation.
A strong tendency exists at the pre
sent time to bring back to the parent
churches the small bodies that have
broken away over matters of minor be
lief and practice. The Methodist
Protestant church, which sprang from
the original Methodist church in 1830
as a protest against the management
of the church by the clergy, can return
without loss of dignity, liecause the
main (Mints asked for by the seceders
were long ago granted. The Method
ist Protestant wing is comparatively
small and ought to reach unity with
the old church without difficulty.
The union of the Methodist Episco
pal church ami the Methodist Episco
pal church south is an entirely differ
ent matter. The division took place
in 1845. It was caused by slaver'.
Since the war the two branches have
still been far apart. They have ad
opted a common hymnal and have
shown a disposition to work in har
mony when possible. Recently two
churches belonging to the different
wings at Chattanooga were uuited and
have agreed to overlook the historic
division. Along the border the ten
dency is to amaglamate or at least to
avoid maintaining different churches
in single communities. All this, tak
en in connection with the committee
work just done at Cincinnati.is hopeful.
But so long as the negro question
remains unsettled there will be no un
ion or the two chief branches of the
Methodist Episcopal church. So long
as public opinion in the church in the
north considers the negro a man and
so long as the prevailing sentiment in
the church in the south is that he is an
animal in the shape of a man, it will
be better for the two bodies to live as
neighbors and not as members of the
same household. State Journal.
WESTERN DEVELOPMENT.
The future of the great west depends
upon the settlement of its unoccupied
areas with energetic and progressive
people and the development of all its
latest resources. Every state in this
large region can easily support a im
putation of many times the number
now withiu its confines, and with the
needed labor and capital would multi
ply its productive output over and
over.
The problem of the great west is
still to attract settlers and investors to
make the most of nature's bounty.
The organization of the Western De
velopment association as au outgrowth
of the Land show at Omaha is unques
tionably a move in the right direction.
Nearly every state between the Mis
souri river and the coast is working
along its own lines to attract immigra
tion, and it goes without saying that by
pulling together they can exert a great
influence than by pulling separately.
Moreover, they have much in common
and little at variance in this matter,
because the first task is to attract at
tention toward the west as a whole,
and if the tide of immigration and in
vestment can be guided in this direc
tion all will share in its benefits.
The competition which these west
ern states have to meet is not that of
one another, but the movement to di
vert immigration on the one side to
the Canadian territory on the north
and the other to the southern and
southwestern states. Transportation
and traffic movements, commercial
and social intercourse, are, with us, al
most entirely east and west, so.it is
largely to our interest to help to peo
ple and develop the country to the
west in preference to other sections
with which we cannot hoprto keep in
close touch. Although all the western
states have made a good showing in
the recent census, strong and systema
tic development work will enable them
to make a still better showing in the
next decade. Omaha Bee.
MR. TAFT AS FINANCIER.
President Taft has proved himself
an exceptionally able finance minister.
When he came to the national capital,
Mr. Taft found an extraordinary state
of confusion' and lack of co-ordination
in the departments of government
Many of the details of administration
dated from the days of the fathers and
the eighteenth century. It was like
carrying transcontinental freight in
wheelbarrows. Things had been
heaped together, they could hardly be
said to have grown. There was dupli
cation, confusion, inefficiency, and
complexity.
Profiting, I think, by his practical
experience as an administrator in the
Philippines, where he had to do much
creative work, Mr. Taft began to over
haul, and to direct the overhauling of,
the whole complicated and overgrown
structure. He soon found that in
every department the work could, by
the application of modern administra
tive methods, be much better done, at
much less cost
It was not at all a question of dis
honesty or personal inefficiency. Pres
ident Taft is very clear about this, and
very highly commends the energy,
honesty, and efficiency of the great
body of public servants. Not the per
sonnel, but the system, was at fault
Rather, there was almost no system in
the modern sense. As a single exam
ple: at some of the minor ports it cost
$300 to collect $1 of customs revenue.
And this is symptomatic of the whole
structure.
Here, then, Mr. Taft is achieving,
and has already achieved, the most
noteworthy results; results directly
beneficial to the nation as a whole;
results briefly summed up in the
words, "a fifty-two million dollar cut."
Which is, of course, a million dollars
a week saved to the American people.
Charles Johnston in Harper's.
WASHINGTON'S BIRTHPLACE.
Perhaps every patriotic American,
and almost every intelligent foreigner,
who visits the national capital makes
a reverential pilgrimage to Mount
Vernon as a part of that visit. Yet
few Americans know and still fewer
have ever visited the birthplace of the
Father of His Country. In this case
the usual order has been inverted. It
is generally the house in which a great
man was born rather than the one in
which tie lived or iu which he died
that attracts the hero worshiper at the
shrine of the great.
In Lincoln's case his home in
Springfield, III., attracts only a mild
degree of interest; but so great was the
interest in the spot where he was born
in Kentucky that the original Ior
cabin, or what is considered to be the
one that formerly stood on the site,
after having been sent about the coun
try as a show attraction, has been
re erected on the original location and
the farm itself is now owned by the
Lincoln Farm association.
In Washington's case the house in
which he was born was long ago per
mitted to fall into decay, and not a
timber or stone of it probably remain
on the original site, which is at Wake
field, Va., on Pope's Creek, near Colo
nial Beach. The plans of it, however,
have been preserved, and now the
Washington board of trade is consid
ering the possibility of a scheme to
reproduce the house on the original
site. The latter is now marked only
by a shaft erected by the United States
government. That the state of Vir
ginia and the government of the
United States have so long suffered
the place where Washington was born
and where he passed his earlier years
to remain neglected is due only to an
oversight and to the fttct that Mount
Vernon, where he lived and where he
lies buried, has become a national
shrine. New York World.
A PANACEA AT LAST.
Of even more wonderful importance
and effect thau at first reported is now
understood to be the marvelous specific
recently discovered by Dr. Ehrlich of
Frankfort, Germany.
When the announcement of Dr.
Ehrlich's discovery was first made to
the public, it was. his idea that the
substance, which was designated "600,"
was a specific practically only in cases
of loathsome blood poisoning, but a
few days since it was proclaimed by
Dr. Samuel W. Lambert, dean of the
College of Physicians and Surgeons in
New York, that purely by accident
Dr. Etener had discovered new prop
erties in "606" which proved its
capacity to drive from the human body
all the germs of all known diseases.
It was in fusing the tips of tubes
containing "606," to protect the re
maining contents, that the discovery
was made. It is stated that the heat
applied for the fusing modified the
drug within in some way to make it
more toxic
Experiments conducted upon ani
mals after the substance was heated
seems to confirm the theory of a toxic
modification of the drug by the heat
ut. jaBoen aeciarea wiw great
enthusiasm that the discovery means '
so much in the medical world, so much
for the emancipation of mankind from
germ diseases, that he feared that a
statement of it would sound like exag
geration. He unhesitatingly declared
it the greatest discovery ever made in
medicine, overshadowing the discovery
even of "606."
If this startling professional an
nouncement should prove true, it
would seem as if the time is at hand
when there need be no more sickness,
for most of the illness to which flesh is
heir seems to have its origin in germs.
When the drug store offers us a medi
cine which will eradicate the germs
from the blood and still leave the fluid
of life, the doctor will find it mighty
hard sledding. Lincoln Star.
TOLSTOY WANTED BLOOD.
Hia Quarrel With Turgeneff and the
Recenciliation That Followed.
Raymond Recouly in the Paris Fi
garo gives the following account of
an early encounter between Tolstoy
and Turgenfff, which shows the Rus
sian sage in a different frame of mind
from the one in which the world has
since come to know him:
It was on the estate of his friend,
the poet Fet near Yasnaya. Tnrgenetf
was among the Invited guests. The
hostess inquired after his daughter,
who was being reared in France.
Turgeneff spoke highly of his Eng
lish governess. "With a truly British
exactitude," he said, "she requested
me to fix the sum which my daughter
might spend for charity. And now
she teaches her pupil to mend the
ragged clothes of the poor.
"And you consider that a good
thing?' asked Tolstoy.
"Certainly," replied the other. "It
brings the benefactor into direct con
tact with the persons whom be is
helping."
"On my part, I think that a well
dressed child who handles dirty and
111 smelling rags Is playing a hypo
critical and theatrical farce."
"I must ask you not to speak In
this way." exclaimed Turgeneff. with
menacing looks.
"Why should I not say what I am
convinced is the truth?" remarked
Tolstoy.
"Ywi think, then, that I am educat
ing my daughter badly." and, while
Fet was interceding. "If you will talk
In that way 1 shall box your ears."
Then he left the room, begging bis
hosts to pardon his abrupt departure.
Tolstoy also went. At the neighbor
ing station be wrote to Turgeneff de
manding an apology. He ordered pis
tols and tried to provoke his rival to a
duel. Turgeneff' s answer, very digni
fied, brought the apology demanded
by Tolstoy. He closed by saying that
he thought it best that two men with
such opposite tempers should hence
forth break off all relations. Tolstoy,
carried away by his anger (It was Iu
1SC1), declined to be satisfied with
such an answer. He felt that he had
been gravely offended. He demanded
reparation by arms. He therefore re
peated his provocations. His friend
Fet, who attempted to pacify him.
succeeded only in drawing from him
this vigorous reply: "I beg of you
henceforth not to write to me any
more. I shall return your letters un
opened, the same as I do with Turge
nefTs." After these occurrences Turge
neff returned to France, where he
passed the greater part of his time.
Some months later, on reflection. Tol
stoy regretted his violence. Seized
with remorse, he sent Turgeneff a let
ter asking his pardon. "I find it ex
ceedingly painful," he wrote, "to
think that I have made an enemy of
you."
Turgeneff forgave, as one may Im
agine, but the complete and definitive
reconciliation took place much later.
OLD ENGLISH HOUSES.
In the Oaya of Waeden Huts, Thatched
Roofs and Clay Floors.
The habitations of English common
people for centuries consisted of a
wooden hut of one room, with the fire
built in the center. To this hut if a
man increased in family and wealth, a
lean-to was added and later another
and another. Tho roofs were of thatch,
the beds of loose straw or straw beds
with bolsters of the same laid on the
floor or perhaps eventually shut in by
a shelf and ledge like the berths of a
ship or by :i small closet
The Saxon thane or knight built
a more pretentious "hall." a large open
room like the lioman atrium with a
lofty roof thatched or covered with
slates or wooden shingles. In the cen
ter of the hard clay floor burned great
fires of dry wood whose thin acrid
smoke escaped from openings In the
roof, above the hearth or by the doors.
windows and openings under the eaves
of the thatch.
By day the "hearthsmen" and vis
itors when not working or fighting sat
on long benches on either side of the
fire and. as John Hay puts it, "calmly
drinked and Jawed" or, gathering at
long boards placed on trestles, regal
ed themselves on some sort of porridge
with fish and milk or meat and ale.
At night straw or rushes spread ou
the floor formed beds for the entire
company in the earlier and ruder days,
when the "baser sort" were glad to
share their straw with the cows.
Charles Winslow Hall in National
Magazine.
Tha Cabal.
The term "cabal" as applied to se
cret factions of any kind bad its rise
in England about 1607, being first ap
plied to the cabinet of Charles II. and
formed from the initials of the cabi
net members' names Lord Clifford.
Lord Ashley, the Duke of Bucking
ham, Lord Arlington and the Duke
of Lauderdale-C. A. B. A. L. Since
that day it has been customary, in all
English speaking lands at least, to ap
ply the name to any secret conclave,
especially in politics.
Tha Way Sha Saw It
"You must not mock people. Hazel.
Once upon a time, the Bible says, a
crowd of little children mocked a good
man named Elisha. and two bears
came out of the forest and killed forty-two
of them."
-wasnt that an awful thus
tor
their motharay-ewark Newa,
laid Fan Development m Wyoming
-r
The Board of Army Engineers appointed to apportion the Reelaawtioa Fund
to taavarioM projects, has set aside 2,000,000 from the special fund, aad
93.185,000 from the regular fuad for use in the North PlatU Valley projeet ia
Wyoming aad Nebraska, aad $2,000,000 from the regular fuad to eosamlate the
Shoshone project ia the Bis; Horn Basin, Wyosuag. making a total of store than
16,000,000 that will be spent by the GoverasMat upon these two projects, in
making desirable homes in Wyoming for our citizeaa.
CAREY ACT
SEVMrlL MILLION DOLLARS will be spent ,by private companies in
Wyoming, and many of these projects will be pashed rapidly to oosaplaiioa.
Just thiBk what the expenditure or SEVERAL MILLION DOLLARS for
irrigation is goiag to mean .to the Suteof Wyoming It means work at good
wages for many people, many new opportunities to get valuable' farm hosses.
more new growing towna and new bnemees locations.
YOU SHOULD KEEP POSTED ABOUT WYOMING! Send me your
name and address for onr mailing list .
9
AFTER THE TEMPEST.
Tha Ganial Calm That Settlad Ovar tha
Prstty Schealma'am.
A pretty schoolma'am once taught
school in a Long Island village. All
the young fellows for miles around
were mad about her. bnt the school
ma'am was proud, and none of the
boys seemed to stand the ghost of a
chance. '
Young Jim Brown, the judge's son.
was the best looking chap In the
town, and Jim probably loved the
schoolma'am more than any of her
other swains, but he never bad the
plnck to declare himself. He felt too
small and mean before the beauty and
learning of the schoolma'am. But one
day, the schoolma'am being away on
a visit in New York state. Jim asked
advice of the editor. The editor said:
"Take the bull by the horns and In
sert an announcement of your forth
coming marriage in my society col
umn. It will cost yon only GO cents."
So Jim inserted an announcement to
the effect that the schoolma'am and
be would be married the next month
and would spend their honeymoon at
Atlantic City.
Well, a short time after this an
nouncement appeared the schoolma'am
came back home. Jim heard on all
sides bow furious she was. For sev
eral days he kept away from her
Then one afternoon as she was com
ing home from school be ran plump
Into her in the lane.
She let him know at once what she
thought of him and bis outrageous
conduct. She stormed and raved, and
her pretty eyes flashed fire. Jim stood
first on one foot and then on the oth
er, and finally he blurted out:
"Well. If you don't like it I can bave
the announcement contradicted."
"Oh. bother Itr said the school
ma'am. "It's too late now." Wash
ington Star.
THEY LIKE PRISON LIFE
A Class of Psrsens In Japan Who Try
to Break Into Jail.
In Japan there are people who make
sham confessions in order to obtain a
period of the comparative warmth and
comfort of a Japanese prison. The
Japan Mail says: "The police slang
of the capital has words to describe
and distinguish these persons. Meshl
kui. or the rice criminal, will steal
some small article from a shop front
in such u way as to be seen doing IL
He then makes a bolt of It. pursued by
the master of the shop, or some faith
ful kozo. but presently allows biuiseir
to be caught and banded to the po
lice. He has to 'do time' for bis pre
tended theft but his rice Is secured
for a period, and when that period has
elapsed be will allow himself to .be
caught again.
"The 'unandon,' or eel bowl' criminal.
is wilier than the one just mentioned.
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PROJECTS
D. CLEM DEAVER. GtHtral ftM
Land Seekers hrfernmiew Mwnum
1004 Farnam StrMt. Onaha. NOr.
He does not actually commit n crime,
such as will pur him Into the convict
side of the prison; bnt allows himself
to l fouud looking In suspicious
places, underneath the broad veranda
of a temple, or in the garden of a pri
vate house. He get Into prison all
right, but he secures the more generou
treatment of the bouse of detention,
which is to tin fare of the convict Jali
what a dih or pels Is to a bowl of
plain rice
"The fcnruma Li a criminal who
makes a shani confession in order to
sneak a free railway ride. The Asasi
tells of n case connected with a mur
der, known as the 'decapitated corpse
case. which took place last year. A
man gave himself up to the police In
Sendai as tin- perpetrator of the crime
He was brought to Tokyo and bis story
investigated It was found to be u
pure fabrication."
A Strauss Story.
A French contemporary tells a
piquant story or the composer of "Sa
lome." He was dining one night with
a party or musical friends when the
conversation turned on the composi
tions of the kaiser. Some or the
guests had expressed their opinions
pretty freely when Herr Strauss put
his finger to his lips and said: "Sh-sir.
You should never run down the com
positions it crowned beads In com
pany There is no telling who wrote
them."
Soma Letters.
An ingenious person has discovered
that the three most forcible letters In
our alphabet are N R G (energy), thai
the two which contain nothing are M
T (empty), that four express great cor
pulence. O B C T (obesity); that two
are in a decline. D K (decay): that
four Indicate exalted station. X L N
C (excellency), and three excite our
tears, yet when pronounced together
are necessary to a good understanding
L E G (elegy and leg).
Willing to Cemaromlee.
"Dldn't you promise never to do that
again?"
"Yes. father."
"And didn't I promise to whale yon
good if you didn't?"
"Yes, but I broke me promise and
won't bold you to yours." Toledo
Blade.
To the Point.
At a teachers conference oue of the
school prim-lpals rose to proiMtse the
toast. "Ijid-: live the teachers.
And a meager, pallid assistant lis
structor in a hollow voice akid. "n
what?" Ladies ilnme Journal
Ita Resemblance
"Did the man whose auto was in oi
llslon last nlghi give it n enrri e
animation?"
"It sounded that way. sir "-Bait!
more American.
Vi
.-. .