The Columbus journal. (Columbus, Neb.) 1874-1911, March 02, 1910, Image 3

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    BETZVnXE TALES
Clorilla Minch and Her Lovers.
'KEiioiffip
i o nw u" xi1 a
m'J'
Wilbur P. Nesbit.
The
r
hr Esllis Parker Butler,
Atdhor of HPids is Pitfs" Eic
ILLUSTRATED By PETER NEWELL
Clorilla Minch was a most attract ivp j l)!o with fi-ar. and she told Abraham
m
Atrl in many ways, ami ;iiit' a belle
;f Uetzvilk, and she would have been
married long ago if her lather had had
sense enough to keep still about Clo
rilla's feet, but as soon as Clorilla
v.ould Ret a lover well primed for the
marriage ceremony old Minch would
take him aside and explain about the
Doosenbury feet. He said he had suf
fered all his life by the Doosenbury
feet, and he wasn't going to have an
other human man step up against
those feet unwarned. Clorilla's mother
had been a Doosenbury, and Clorilla
:nherited the feet along that line.
Old Minch would say: "Now, for
orty year 1 have had Maria's feet
against the small of my back every
night, and every night her feet were
like ice, and if I hadn't been a martyr
by nature, and meek and mild, never
would 1 have stood it. And look at
me now. My back bone Is froze solid
ind I can't bend in the middle. Doc
Weaver says it's no use trying to thaw
:t out for Maria freezes it up again
very night. And Clorilla has her
ma"- feet, only colder." Then he
would call attention to Clorilla's feet,
which wcri' actuallv so cold that frost
gathered on the outside of her shoes
so the hottest August weather. In
oo! weather they were ten times cold
er. Generally this frightened the lover
away, but not always.
Abraham Wangle was one it didn't
Tighten away, and Phillipus Googe
as another, and it looked as if thev
Wangle that she could never marry
a man with an icy back, and poor Ab
raham had to start in again, training
his back to like heat. He gradually
reduceu the quantity and coldness of
his ice pack, and then began wearing
a small oil stove on the small of his
back, and in a few months he could
lie right down with his back on a hot
stove and never know it. It was just
then that Phillipus Googe forever de
prived himself of all hopes of Clorilla
by sending her a much larger tireless
heater. Clorilla said this was an in
sult, and that she would never use a
tireless cooker again, and to show her
hatred of Phillipus she discontinued
useing the cooker and began resting
her feet for hours at a time on a cake
of Ice. So Abraham Wangle had to
suirt in once more icing his back.
Abraham Iced his back and iced it,
md then he began to be frightened,
or it would not grow cold. It re
gained hot. He went to see Doc
Veaver about it. ,and Doc told him
plainly that the sudden change from
hot to cold and back to hot again had
taken the temper out of the small of
his back, and had rendered it imper
vious to inlluences of temperature,
and that it was like a tireless cooker
now. and would remain hot as long
as it remained at all. So Abraham
spoke to Clorilla, and she did what
was right and began to heat up her
feet again. Hut when she tried it she
II )C2 3Qj 8e
fl W f i A if Hi v
L i i J A if M V
J AV i n h.
I i li MI k&A zM wM ,
? l 0m m l
7 lH i 1 1
tv
V Zdr&lc me-r?l'
LSV rtfv&Ct VILwEmI MPlw. fwffiimfcUHl HHVB I A I
now srtly lo the (lakes come through
the air
And dance as blossom petals here and
thero.
As silently, as aimlessly, each Roes
(Wail just a minute till I warm my nose.)
The mealowlanl Is billowed with the
drifts
Save where sonic sturdy tree its branches
lifts
And tosses back the tumbled snowy
foam
(Croat Scott! It's halt a mile from here
to home.)
Xow see the wanton xusts that play and
prank
And Hint; the spinning flakes against yon
bank
Which, ivoried. Is mighty bulk uproars
in nave to pause again to warm my
ears.)
And now as thntixh in some wild form of
dance
The Hikes In wild abandon slint and
qlance
As fairies leaving neither traeo nor
track
(Ouh! Half a bushel went riiit down my
back!)
BURDENS LIFTED FROM BAD BACKS
Weary is the back that bears the burden of kidney ills. There's no rest nor peace for the man or
woman who has a bad back. The distress begins in early morning. You feel lame and not refreshed.
It's hard to get out of bed. It hurts to stoop to tie your shoes. All day the ache keeps up. Any sudden
movement sends sharp twinges through the back. It is torture to stoop or straighten. At night the suf
ferer retires to toss and twist and groan. Backache is kidney ache a throbbing, dull aching in the kid
neys. Plasters or liniments won't do. You must get at the cause, inside.
DOWS KIDNEY PILLS CURE SICK KIDNEYS
comes
echoes failing
Then silence
Koes by
With wailing
sky.
And oh. the wondrous
snows
(And oh. I know I've
toes.)
TWICE-TOLD TESTIMONY
A Car of Severe Kidaey Disease Verified
By Test of.Tune
William 51. Sears. -U3 W. Cherry
Street. Xevada, Mo., says: "I was
convinced of the great value of
Doan's Kidney Pills through per
sonal experience. Four or five
months ago I suffered a great deal
from a pain across the small of my
back, extending nt times Into mv
limbs and shoulders. When I
stooped or did any work that
brought a strain on the muscles of
my back, my trouble was aggra
vated. I tried a number of reme
dies but without success. After a
short time I could see that they
were benefiting me, and the con
tents of two and onohalf boxes
cured me." (Statement given In
May, law.)
RE-ENDORSEMENT
On Dee. 3rd. IKS. Mr. Sears said:
I .still have great faith in Iioan'3
Kidney Pills. I feel justified in re
endorsing this remedy as it has
done jo much for me."
I "B
and so the storm I
the .0BBHIHIIHBBIHHHHHBiHHIHl
magic of the V V I
my H nK'P.- .k. A '. THA
pgpgjljg intlAiN o
SS&Z&L- Nfcfir. smyA m trfU,Ki-i,TiJ - ..! .- r,---
How To Tell When The
Kidneys Are
Disordered
PAINFUL SYMPTOMS
Backache, sldrache. pains when stooping or lifting, sud
den sharp twinges, rheumatic pains, neuralgia, painful,
fccanty or loo frequent urination, dizzy spells, dropsy,
URINARY SYMPTOMS
Dircolorcd or cloudy urine. Urine that contains sedi
ment. Urine that stains t':e linen. Painful passages,
lilood or shreds in the ut:ue. i-et a bottleful of the
morning urine stand for 14 hours. If it shows a cloudy
or tlcccy settling, or a layer or lino grains, like brick
dust, the kidneys are disordered.
A TK1AL FREE pubVc
Cut oat this coupon, mail it to Foster-Milburn
Co.. Buffalo. N. Y. A free trial package of
Doan's Kidney Pills will be mailed you
promptly. w.s.u.
NEVER ANY RETURN
A Ci lite Cere of KUeey Troable
ead Dropy
Mrs. L. 1. Babers. 1613 Terry St..
Houston. Texas, says: "I hold a
very high opinion of Doan's Kid
ney Pills and with good reason, for
three years ago they cured me of
kidney trouble that hud clung to
me for several years. There was
a dropsical swelling of my feet and
limbs in addition to other symp
toms of kidney complaint', and al
though I used various remedies, I
was not helped until I procured
Doan's Kidney PHIs. Two boxes
of this preparation cured me and I
have .never had the slightest return
of my trouble. I have recom
mended Doan's Kidney Pills to
many people who have questioned
me about them, and I know ol sev
eral cases In which they have done
the same good work."
The Author's Dream.
Ah. here's our morning's mail.
Such a hunch of nice, fat letters:
and all from publishers, too. Let's
see. now. where shall we begin? This
one from Nihhler's Magazine will do
to start with:
"Dar Sir." it ays, ''wc beg to sub
mit herewith for your possible accept
ance a check Tor $200. It is drawn, as
o:i see. to ourselves, bat we have in
dorsed it on the back. Stamps are
inclosed for its return If unavailable."
Sond it back. Nothing written on
both sides of the paper can be consid
ered. When will these people learn
how to do things? Now the next one:
Somebody's Magazine writes: "We
take pleasure in inclosing a draft for
' $1,000 and hope you may find it
i worthy of acceptance. We should feel
gratified, indeed, to see any of our
money used by you. Stamps inclosed
KIDNEY PILLS
Socents.. Foster-Milburn CoxBuffalo. N Y- Proprietors.
BWiTTili
Iftfcefctais
Its Your K
1
- yl
LASSITUDE.
PUTNAM FADELESS DYES
Ctfwi
fcritMn m iMtef cefn Wan ay rther 4m. Owe Me Btclate cgtew iH torn. They to in coM water hetter than am Hwrtfya. VmcmM
wmiiwmi u ii wwmw !. ra. mammae amwm oo., Qwlmmy, Mhmlm.
So Every Day Clorilla Would Cook Up a Bran Mash and Put It in th
Cooker Very Hot, and Put Her Feet in It.
Waldo And why would you rather
have one million than two, Wcg?
Wcg Easier to count, Wallie.
TACK THIS UP
Prescription That Breaks Up the Worst
Cold in a Day.
Every winter this prescription is pub-1
lished here and thousands have been ;
benefited by it. "Get two ounces of j
Glycerine and half an ounci of Con- j
ccntratca I'ine compound. Then get
i lnvBH VJPvl-l9 flpslw
He Had No Objection.
"We we want you to marry us."
said the blushing young man, indica-
I ting a young woman with downcast j
I eyes and smiling face "who stood a step
behind him.
"Come in," said the minister, and he
endeavored to case their embarrass
ment for a moment; but he soon de
cided that it was useless to try.
"Will you be married with a ring?"
he inquired.
The young man turned a helpless
gaze on his companion, and then
looked at the minister.
"If you've got one to spare and it
can come out o' the two dollars, 1
guess she'd like it," he said at last.
National Food Magazine.
B tit m I
J ISA
Look at the Lower Bearing !
Have it taVen apart wlit-n you examine any
separator you think of buying. Then ramparo
It B.-ltl tkuultuvlm hall ! tut ! f thM
'atiin;tl. Jmno-sible to got out of order NoUrf
easy to adjust. The bowl of the Lillia
National Cream Separator
makes from 8,000 to 10,000 revolutions
minute. Think hour perfect thut bearing Easiest
must bo to atuutl uci a whirl twireaday ctci-mf
forover IS yearn. u many Rational have, -c:,c,
insist on your tlcaler Ieuioii.-tr::tlii(T a Nation
al to jmi Wfore buying a separator at any
price. Jiin-iiraieu catalogue ol lull particu- rtmjU
THE XATIONAI. DAIKY MA CHINK CO.
Goheu, Ind. Chicago, 11L
c
er H J
Marrying for Money.
'Her father doesn't approve of my
suit.
Miuld tiik it out and have :i tijxht
Ki' for Clorilla's hand Abraham told
..id Minch that he uuessed he could
-.'and a sin::l2 thin? Iil; a pair of cold
ot mi huit; as he had had fair no
irt :ind he "vent to work immediately
.iti:: inti tniinim;. Every ninht
.vhen h' retired he tM!c a "lO-ponnd
..il: of ice and Strapped it to the
tnall of his tuU'k. hopm? thus to ?rad-
ally become acelir'atrd to the tem
'ratur that Clorilla's f--t would be.
t first Jh ire rive him shi(rs. but
found that her feet were like the small
of Abraham's back and had lost their
temper and would never become warm
again. They were like a sealed cold
storage vault and would remain mid
as Ions as they were feet. At present
looks as if Clorilla and Abraham were
to be forever separated, and T'ncle
Ashdcd Cloois says it is one of the
i-iost striking warnings against flirt-
for return if unavailable."
i,,n i ,,V4k tj- v,,-tm . ... .1a.h I fnniri v i,r. .....rksa...a rri.A 11, niinni v l-ii.i. ,i,,. .m ..,,. ..
to $:: and sive us the book nnd rfm. ' half a nint of cood whiskev nmi nut ' lareer cherk in it " ?
... ... . 1. . . - " . "" i
matic ngnts aim we will make them a . tne other two ingredients into it. Take
proposition. J a teaspoonful to a tablcspoonful of this
Here's a heavy-set letter. Is it not. mixture after each meal and at bed
though? From the Fridav .Morning time- Shake the bottle well each time."
ATXEVS TXrStl BAT-AM
Bandera usl ut"sJ.fullv fory-arj.firOf p-vated
roughs, rn'ils ami brom-lillis. KrprTNxly should
laow about It. It IsjJtnplo. hafoumlun'.
Pom. eh? What do they send?
"We inclose a $50 bank note for
your consideration. Perhaps you can
make use of it as miscellany. If not.
please return in inclosed envelope."
This is from Harfcor s Monthly, and
ing he has ever s. en. for if Conlla had i ",e-v Des IO I,XCIOse a cnecK tor Sl.,0.
not tried to draw Phillinus on she nml two $- notr a!so for SO-cent
would, bv this time, bave had a cood Ieces. and tru?t they may be avail-
many inter-
n :i month or two he had become so ! husband with an ice coid back to nlarn ;U',C 'or Fon,c o1 'our
.ed to the toldness of it that he did; her ice cold feet against. Hut old "?tin? departments."
nit feel it at all. and he begin com-j Minch scoffs nt this, lie says that' Preev fair, aren't they? Shall we
l.iining that the let7vil!e Ice Com-j from what he know ot Doosenbury . k'I them? No, hardly. The public
natiy's ue wa poor ice. At the end feet no one with fi i-t of that kind 1 ,s irc1 ol i0-cent pieces, and the oth-.-;"
the third month he stnt up north would ever marry a man she could ' ors nre reminiscent of former contri-
mi- his ice. so as to get a ctvder oiiali- ' not annoy with them. The majoritv f buttons trom ttie same people. Write
and each month after that he would the Itetzville voters agree with him.
-.'ml further north for his ice. In a
-jjort time the small of his back be--.ime
so used to cold ice that it suffer
ed with the boat when it had no ice
.n it. and he had to go around all day
Aith ire on his back. It melted and
.in down into his shoes, and Abraham
Wangle going along Main street sound
d like a cow in a slushy lane.
iUit Phillipus Ooege went about it
anoth r way. On Clorilla's birthday
gave her a ftreless cooker. Phil
".'pus lieped that if Clorilla cooked her.
et in the tireless cooler every day
.:, v.ould gradually cook the cold out
I them, for a Tireless cooker needs
: o lire, bat keeps on cooking anything
mat is P"t in it until it !s taken out
again. So every day Clorilla would
.tiofc up a bran mash and put in the
ooker very hot, and put her feet in
it At first the mash had a habit of
t : mine mto a solid chunk of iced
(CopxriK'H. V.f'J. !y W. CI. Cliaptinin.)
The Death of the Tashi Lama.
A Tashi Lama, when he feels the
not meet any present
that they do
need of ours.
What's this foreign package? From
London? The Pell Mell Magazine?
So? They say: "We send herewith
two Uank of England notes, and
hope "
Can't take them. People don't care
a rap for any foreign stuff any more.
and
' flnr ennrmoJ
W.....O- v.ijiuuuu
Hut be sure to get only the genuine
Concentrated Pine. Kacii half ounce
bottle comes in a tin screw-top case.
Any druggist has it on hand or will
quickly get it from the wholesale
house. Many other pine extracts arc
impure and cause nausea.
The Appetites of Kings.
The king of Spain makes up for his
daily expenditure of activity by a tre
mendous appetite. I have observed,
for that matter, that the majority of
sovereigns are valiant trenchermen.
Every morning of his life Alfonso XIII.
has a good rump steak and potatoes
for his first breakfast, often preceded
by eggs and sometimes followed by
salad and fruit. From Recollections
of M. Paoli in McClure's.
Many a man's good reputation is
due to what isn't found out about
him.
Then are imitation, don't be fonlod.
Ask for Lewi Single Hinder cigar for .V.
Many a man has kicked himself out
of a good iob.
Constipation
Nearly Every On Gets It
The bowels show first sign
of things going wrong. A
Cascarsl taken every night
as needed keeps the bowels
working naturally without
grip, gripe and that upset
sick feeling. ?
Ten cent box. week's treatment.
AH drusr stores. Uftfecst seller in
tlie world a:i"ion boxes a month.
1 B TPIIT Rontan1 Aflnro CTIKK. 1m
K ll I EH I l-wWiUitncr. Washington.
IHI I lM-.Kit-Jji.lJe-.reIcrcu.::
xxJutSyUsC??
ne-s. has no longer any control over
h:.-- body, and becomes limp, he is
V. nn immediately npon coming in con- j Kl hi up, and When life has llown be is
;i-- with her feet, and then her par-1 j.-,, placed that he grows rigid in the
-nt w.suld have to chip off the icy j orthodox position. The corpse is
uui-s with an ice pick. b:it gradually ' clothed a priestly vestments . . .
her fee' began to warm up. and they i and is placed as quicklv as possible.
still in n sitting fashion, in a metal
vessel, which is fillod wiMi s.ilr nnd
I hermetically sealed."
approach of death, must, in accord
ance with the directions of the holy
law. remain in a sitting position, with I
his legs lucked under him and his j
nanus paims upwards m Ins lap. for Ilr r-r-r r-r-r-r!
tsays Mr. Sven lledin in "Traus-i that alarm clock!
Himalaya: Macinillan) "he must die
in the same attitude as the meditat
ing Uuddha. His last moments are
soothed by a number of monks, who ' i,,;rt:,,. i ;..
11 is reiaiea 01 tne president of a
, fnnious rolleirp fhnt nt nno limu ho ol.
and continually prostrate themselves lov,ed his wifc to persuade hlm of tne
with their hands and foreheads j ust -4 . gsg Qf flre insurance on house
on the ground. paying divine nold , (ls aml he allowed his polf
honors to him and his departing to lar ,. Hut bettcr judgment assert.
spirit. When he has lost conscious- ns, it.(... - nnnllv mno hi. t,..
i ance. Tht -ne day a fire in his wife's
rooms dest cj some of her dresses-
surround him on all sides, fill the air
with the murmur of their prayers,
Damage Done by Smoke.
Herbert M. Wilson, of the United
States geological survey, places the
annual damage and waste by smoke
in the United States at $500,000,000
in the large cities alone, or about $G
to each man.
population.
woman and child of the
-BMmiBi
iZ'.t tikE-vFFrK:
I'1' ''' ' ' ' ' ' :l '-- '' :'..i..i '
fi
This Will Interest Mothers.
Mother Gray's Sxrcct Powders for Children,
cure Feverishness, Headache, Bad Stomach,
Teething Disorders. Herniate the Bowels and
Destroy Worms. They break up colds in 2-1
hoars. I'leat-ant to take, and harmless as milk.
They never fail. At all Ornpeibts, 5c Sample
mailed FREE. Address, Alien S. Olmsted.
Le lUy, X. Y.
Neglected,
child gels everything
It
tzvrw warmer and warmer as the
weeks went by, until Clorilla could not
e the bran mash hot enough to feel
eon.fortaMe. Even wtien it was boil
::.g be: Clorilla complained that it,
: -It bi'ly to her feet, and her feet
.. :mv so permanently warm that
xh n :-le put on her shoes they
-o-.-hi-: tiie leather, and she had to
a' '. ..-ciia: shoes made, lined with
!i
iba time the verj- thought of
;.g..:::st her feet made her trem-
In New York Factories.
The salaries of the G.1.2J1 officers
and clerks of the 20.P39 factories of
New York city amount to S7".017.356
every year. The number of wage earn-
i ers in these factories is greater than
the population of many large cities.
The pay of the wage earners is nearly
$2."0.'i0i0rt annually.
which th professor enjoyed as a good
joke.
In due time the president of the in
surance company wrote President
Blank this letter:
"Dear Mr. Wank: We inclose check
for S500. paying your fire claim under
our policy BC007.
"I note in passing upon these papers
that the policy went into effect at
noon. December 10. and the fire did not
occur until :'. p. m. Why the delay?"
Circle Magazine.
Nothing liner can be found in wo
'ren than thai kindness of heart and
v.u'c: sympathy which finds expres
-ion in v. crks of charity. The Gentle
-.toman
"That
wants."
"And still it never gets what it real"
ly needs."
"You surprise me!"
"!t needs a spanking."
If It's Your Eye Use Perm's Eye Salve,
for inflammation, ftys. itching lids, eye
aches. defoct of viirn snd sensitivitv to
strong light. AH
Bros., Buffalo, X. Y.
or Howard
Appropriate.
"How shall I set this ad. for the
mirstrel show?"
"How? Why. in black-faced
you ninny."
type.
PT.ES CURED IX C TO 14 DATS.
?AZO OINTVKNTi.cnarant'r.i to run- arr
oi itrmre. Ii:n-I. i.:rlins tir l'ri.tnuling p&e jn
Answer me quick, what help, what
hand, do you stretch o'er destruction's
brink? Browning.
m
ll'
m
lJ
l
:
.i
'Ka
li:
1
.
m
ALCOHOL-3 PER CENT
Aegetabk Preparation For As
similating rhe Food and Redia
ling the Stomachs and Bon-els cf
. MmBMMMIII JfcWB
.r
ii
AJ
c
Promotes Digeslion.Chfcerful
ness and Resl. Contains neither
Opium .Morphine nor Mineral
Not Narcotic
Wpe SOU DrSAHVEimCrSt
jffxSeimm
fiothtlltSmtts .
Anitt Sttd
tpptrmimt -
himSttd -
Crnd Smj
Ifnkryrrtit FTtnor.
A perfect Remedy forConslipa
lion . Sour Stomach.Diarrhoea,
Worms .Convulsions .Fo'erish
ness and LOSS OF SLEEP.
facsimile Signature of
Tht Cestacr Company.
NEW YORK.
UASTWIA
For Infants and Cliildren.
The Kind You Have
Always Bought
Bears the
Signature
W
ll dim
Guaranteed under the Feodart
Copy ofWrcppeCi
In
Use
For Over
Thirty Years
WOT
$33
Chicago
to
California
This low one-way rate
in effect daily
March 1
April 15
inclusive
via
Union Pacific
Southern Pacific
"The Safe Road to Travel"
Electric block sig
nal protection din
ing car meals snd
service "Best in the
World."
For further infonnati?n
call on or address
E-L.LOMAX.aP.Ar
Oaafca
isa
A Miracle of Comfort aad Coavenience
NO STROPPING NO H0?FG
unma
K.NOVm THE
metmiM
wtmjesa
B L
WORLD OVA
PARKER'S
HAIR BALSAM
rtouHsa n Icnruct frowth.
Zinor T?iV.c to Bcstcr Grer
2Jilr to Its Youthful C6!orw