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URGES CONSERVATION OF
THE NATION'S RESOURCES
President Taft Sends Special Message to Con
gress Recommending Prevention of Land
Frauds, Control of Water Power, Fos
tering of Soils and Kindred Subjects
Washington. Jan. 14 Following is
the complete text of the special mes
sage on the conservation ot the na
tion's resources sent to the senate
and house of representatives by Pres
ident Taft today:
i
To the Senate and House of Kepresenta
i tlves:
J In my annual message I reserved the
subject of tlii conservation ot our na
tional resources for disposition in a spe
cial message, as follows:
; In several departments there pre
sented the necessity for locution look
Ins to the further -onvivatioii of our
national resources, and the subject Is one
Ot su-h importance as to teijuire a more
jfietailed and extended discussion than
can be entered upon in this communica
tion. For that reason I li:ill" take an
early opportunity to semi a special trios
Base to congress on the vuhject of the
Improvement of our wattT:s. upon the
reclamation and Irrigation of and. -.enn-arid
and swamp lands, upon the preser
vation of our forests and the re-foresting
of suitable areas, upon the rc-classltica-tlon
of the public domain ivilti a view ot
separating from agricultural settlement
mineral, coal and phosphate lands and
files belonging to the government bor
dering on streams suitable for the utili
zation of wafr power
In 1SC0 we had a public domain of l.av(.
S11.2SS acres. We have now 731.3.M.OS1
acres, confined largely to the mountain
ranges and the arid and -semi-arid plains.
We have. In addition. 2r.-i.035.S7.') acres or
land In Alaska
Disbursement of Public Lands.
The public lands were, dining the earli
est administrations, treated as a national
asset for the liquidation of the public
debt and as a source of reward for our
soldiers and sailors. Tailor on they were
donated In large amounts in aid of the
construction of wagon rn.nris and rail
ways, in order to open up regions in the
west then almost Inaccessible All the
principal land statutes were enacted more
tbnn a quarter of a eenturv sico The
homestead act. thp pre-emption and timber-culture
act. the coal land and the
mining acts were among th-se
The rapid disposition of the public lands
under the early statutes, and the lav
methods of distribution prevailing, due. I
vhinU. to the belief that tese lands
phould rapidly pass Into p-ivate owner
ship, gave rise to the Impression that
the public domain was legitimate prey
for the urrcrupulous and thnt it was not
contrary to good morals to circumvent
the land laws. This proligal manner of
disposition resulted in the passing of
large areas of valuable land and many
of our national rerources inio the hands
of persons who felt little or no responsi
bility for promoting the national wel
fare through their development.
Fraudulent Titles.
The truth Is that title to millions of
acres of public lands was fr tudulently
obtained and that the right to recover a
large part of such lands for the govern
ment long since ceased bv reason of stat
utes of limitations There has developed
in recent years a (if concern in the
public mind respertins the preservation
and proper ue of our natural resources.
This Ins been ptrticiilarly directed
oward the conservation of the resources
of the public domain A vast amount of
discussion lias appeared in the public
tuints in generalized form on "this sub
ject, but there has been little practical
suggestion. It has been easv to s.iv that
the natural resources in fuel supply, in
forests, in water power, and in other
VUblic utilities. must be saved from
waste, moropolv. aid other abuses, and
the general public Is In accord with this
proposition, as they are with mn-;t
truisms. The problem, however. Is how
to save and how to util5- how to con
serve and still develop, for no sane per
son can contend that if is for the com
mon good that nature's blessings are
only for unborn generations
Noteworthy Reforms.
Among the most noteworthy reforms
Initiated by mv distinguished predecessor
were the vigorous p-osecution of land
frauds and the bringing to public atten
tion of the necessity for preserving the
remaining public domain from further
spoliation, for the maintenance and ex
tension of our forest resources, and for
the enactment of laws amending the ob
colete statutes so as to retain govern
mental control over that part of he pub
lic domain in which there are valuable
deposits of coal, of oil. and of phosphate,
mid. in addition thereto, to preserve con
trol, under conditions favo-able to the
tublic. of the lands along the streams in
which the fall of water can be made to
generate power to be transmitted in the
form of electricity many miles to the
point of Its use. known as ""uater power"
fcites.
The investigations Into violations of the
public land laws and the prosecution of -j
land frauds have been vigorously con
tinued under my administration, as has
been the withdrawal of coal lands for
classification and valuation and the tem
porary withholding of power sites Since
March 4. 1W9. temporary withdrawals of
power sites have been mad on 102
streams and these v lthdrawals therefore
cover 223 per cent, more streams than
were covered by the withdrawals made
prior to that date.
The present statutes, except so far
as they dispose of the precious metals
and the purely agricultural lands, are
not adapted to carry out the modern
view of the best disposition of public
lands to private ownership, under con
ditions offering on the one hand suffi
cient inducement to private capital to
take them ovef for proper develop
ment, with restrictive conditions on
the other which shall secure to the
public that character of control which
will prevent a monopoly or misuse of
the lands or their products. The power
of the secretary of the interior to with
draw from the operation of existing
sratutts tracts of land, the disposition
of which under such statutes would
be detrimental-to the public interests.
Is not clear or satisfactory. This power
has been exercised in the interest of
the public, with the hope that congress
might ailirm the action of the execu
tive by laws adapted to the new condi
tions. Unfortunately, congress has not
thus far fully acted on the recommen
dations of the executive, and the ques
tion as to what the executive is to
do is under the circumstances, full of
difficulty. It seems to me that it is
the duty of congress now. by a statute,
to validate the -withdrawals which
have been mad- y the secretary of the
Interior and the president and to tire
the secretary of the interior temporar
ily to withdraw lands pending submis
sion to consrrttss o? reccaaiecdi'.icr.s mi
CHASE GAME IN MOTOR CARS
New Sport That Is Said to Be Popular
Among Hunters in West
ern Kansas.
Automobiles are revolutionizing
methods of hunting wild game in
western Kansas. A wolf hunt under
the new plan is most exciting. One
runs the automobile and another does
the shooting. A machine can run
miles and miles on the open prairie of J
to legislation to meet conditions or
emergencies as they arise.
Properly to Classify Lands.
One of the most pressing needs In
the matter of public-land reform is
that lands should be classified accord
ing to their principal value use. This
ought to be done by that or department
whose force is best adapted to that
work It should be done by the Inter
ior department through the geological
survey Much of confusion, fraud, and
contention which has existed in the
present has arisen from the lack of
an otiicial and determinative classifi
cation of the public lands and their
'ontents
It is now proposed to dispose of ag
ricultural lands rs such and at the
same time to reserve for other disposi
tion the treasure of coal. oil. ashphal
tum. natural gas and phosphate con
tained therein This may lie best ac
complished lv separating the right
to mine from the title to the surface,
giving the necessarv use of .so much of
the latter as may he required for the
extraction of the deposits The sur
face might be disposed of as agricul
tural land under the general agricul
tural statutes, while the coal or other
mineral could be disposed of by lease
on a royalty basis, with the provisions
requiring a certain amount of develop
ment each vear: and in order to pre
vent the use anil cession of said lands
with others of similar character so as
to eonstitute a monopoly forbidden by
law. the lease should contain suitable
provision sublecting to forfeiture the
interest of persons participating in
such monopoly. Such law should ap
plv to Alaska as well as to the United
States.
Statute Difficult to Frame.
Tt Is exceedingly difficult to frame
a statute to retain government control
over a property to be developed by
private capital In such a i..anner as
to secure the governmental purpose
and at the same time not frighten
avav the investment of the necessary
capital Hence, it may be necessary
by laws that are really only experi
mental to determine from their prac
tical operation what Is the best
method of securing the result aimed at
The extent of the value of phosphate
is hardly realized, and with the need
that there will be for It as the years
roll on and the necessity for fertiliz
ing the land shnll become more acute,
this will be a product which will prob
alilv attract the greed of monopolists
Public Land Alonq Streams.
"With respect to the public land
which lies along the streams offering
opportunity to convert water power
into transmissible electricity, another
important phase of the public land
question is piesented There are val
uable water power sites through all
the public land states. The opinion
is held that the transfer of sovereignty
from the federal government to the
territorial governments as they become
states, included the water power in
the rivers except so far as that owned
by riparian proprietors. I do not
think it necessary to go into discussion
of this somewhat moot d question of
law. Tt seems to me sullicient to say
that the man who owns and controls
the land along the stream from which
the power is to be converted and trans
mitted, owns land which Is indispens
able to the conversion and use of that
power. I cannot conceive how the
power In streams flowing through pub
lic lands can be made available at all
except by using the land itself as the
site for the construction of the plant
by which the power is generated and
converted and securing a right of way
thereover for transmission lines. Un
der these condition, if the government
owns the adjacent land indeed, if the
government is the riparian owner It
may control the use or the water power
by imposing proper conditions on the
disposition of the land necessary in the
creation and utilization of the water
power.
Value of Water Power.
The development hi electrical appli
ances for the conversion of the water
power into electricity to be transmitted
long distances has progressed so far that
it is no longer problematical, but it is a
certain inference that in the future the
power of the uater falling in the streams
to a large extent will take the place of
natural fuels. In the disposition of the
domain alteady granted, many water
power sites have come under absolute
ownership, and may drift into one own
ership, so that all the water power under
private ownership shall be a monopoly.
If. however, the water power sites now
owned by the government and there are
enough of them shall be disposed of to
private persons for the investment of
their capital in such a way as to prevent
their union for purposes of monopoly
with other water power sites, and under
conditions that shall limit the right of use
to not exceeding thirty years with renewal
privileges and some equitable means of
fixing terms of rental and with proper
means for determining a reasonable grad
uated rental, it would seem entirely pos
sible to prevent the absorption of these
most useful lands by a power monopoly.
As long as the government retains con
trol and can prevent their improper union
with other plants, competition must be
maintained and prices kept reasonable.
Soils Must Be Conserved.
In considering the conservation of the
natural resources of the country, the fea
ture that transcends all others, including
woods, waters, minerals, is the soil of the
country. It is incumbent upon the gov
ernment to foster by .ill available means
the resources of the country that produce
the food of the people. To this end the
conservation of the soils of the country
should be cared for with all means at the
government's disposal Their productive
powers should have the attention of our
scientists that we may tonserve the new
soils, improve the old soils, dram wet
sens, ditch swamp soils, levee river ovcr
llow soils, grow trees on thin soils, pas
ture hillside soils, rotate crops on all
soils, discover methods for cropping dry
land soils, find grasses and legumes for
all soils, feed grains and mill feeds on
the farms where they originate, that the
soils fiom whkh they come may be en
riched. A work of the utmost Importance to in
form and instruct the public on this chief
branch of the conservation of our re
sources is being carried on successfully
In the department of agriculture: but it
ought not to escape public attention that
state action in addition to that of the de
partment of agriculture fas for instance
in the drainage of swamp lands) is es
sential to the best treatment of the soils
in the manner above indicated.
The act by which. In semi-arid parts of
the west without coming in contact
with a fence or a creek. When a
wolf or coyote is scared up the auto
mobile takes after him. A wolf runs
in an easy circle. He doesn't dodge
back and forth. So it is comparative
ly easy for the driver to keep right
behind him. But the automobile must
have great speed.
A coyote can run 30 miles an hour
with ease. A few days ago some Gar
den City hunters ran down a coyote
and killed him with the wheels. That
was consideraa a great hunting feat
the public domain, the area of t..e home
stead ha? been enlarged from 160 to 220
acres has resulted most beneficially In
the extension or "dry farming" and in
the demonstration which has been made
of the possibility, through a arIation in
the character and mode of culture, of
raising substantial crops without the
presence of such a supply of water as
has been heretofore thought to be neces
sary for agriculture.
But there are millions of acres of com
pletely arid land in the public domain
which, by the establishment of reservoirs
for the storing of water and the irri
gation of the lands, may be made much
more fruitful and productive than the
best lands in a climate where the mois
ture comes from the clouds. Congress
recognized the importance of this method
of artificial distribution of water on the
arid lands by the passage of the reclama
tion act. The proceeds of the public
lands creates the fund to build the works
needed to store and furnish the neces
sary water, and It was left to the secre
tary of the interior to determine what
projects should be started among those
suggested and to direct the reclamation
service, "with the funds at hand and
through the engineers in its employ, to
construct the works.
Xo one can visit the far west and the
country of arid and semi-arid lands with
out being convinced that this is one of
the most Important methods of the con
servation of our natural resources that
the government has entered upon. It
would appear that over SO projects have
been undertaken, and that a few of
these are likelv to be unsuccessful be
cause of lack of water, or for other rea
sons, but generally the work which has
been done has been well done, and many
im.ioitant engineering problems have
been met and solved.
Funds Inadequate for Service.
One of the difficulties which has
arisen is that too mny projects in
view of the available funds have been
set on foot. The funds available under
the reclamation statute are inadequate
to complete these proleets within a
reasonable time. And vet the projects
have been begun: settlers have been
invited to take up and. in many in
stances, have taken up. the public land
within the projects, relvtng upon thfir
prompt completion. The failure to
complete the projects for their benefit
is. in effect, a breach of faith and
leaves them in a most distressed con
dition I urge that the nation ought
to afford the means to lift them out of
the verv desperate condition in which
they now are.
This condition does not Indicate any
excessive waste or any corruption on
the part of the reclamation service. It
onlv indicates an over-zealous desire
to extend the benefit of reclamation
to as many acres and as many states
as possible. I recommend, therefore.,
that authority be given to Issue, not
exceeding $"0,000,000 of bonds from
time to time, as the secretary of the
interior shall find it necessary, the
proceeds to be applied to the comple
tion of the projects already begun and
their proper extension, and the bonds
running ten years or more to be taken
up by the proceeds of returns to the
reclamation fund, which returns, as
the years, go on. will increase rapidly
in amount.
There is no doubt at all that if
these bonds were to be allowed to run
ten years, the proceeds from the public
lands, together with the rentals for
water furnished through the completed
enterprises, would quicklv create a
sinking fund large enough to retire
the bonds within the time specified. I
hope that, while the statute shall pro
vide that these bonds are to be paid
out of the reclamation fund, it will be
drawn in such a way as to sr-ure in
terest at the lowest rate, and that the
credit of the United States will be
pledged for their redemption.
I urge consideration of the recom
mendations of the secretary of the
interior in his annual report for
amendments of the reclamation act.
proposing other relief for settlers on
these projects
New Law Requisite.
Respecting the comparatively small
timbered areas on the public domain not
included in national forests because of
their isolation or their special valuo for
agricultural or mineral purposes, it is ap
parent from the evils resulting by vir
tue of the imperfections of existing laws
for the disposition of timber lands that
the acts of June 3. 17''. should be re
pealed and a law enacted for the dispo
sition of the timber at public sale, the
lands after the removal of the timber to
be subject to appropriation under the
agricultural or mineral land laws
What 1 have said is really an epitome
of the recommendations of the secretary
of the interior In respect to the future
conservation of the public domain in his
present annual report. He has gl-en
close attention to the problem of disposi
tion of these lands under such conditions
as to invite the private capital necessary
to their development on the one hand,
and the maintenance of the restrictions
nece.ss.iry to prevent monopoly and abuse
from absolute ownership on the other.
Tliese recommendations are incorporated
in bills he has prepared, and they are at
the disposition of the congress. I earnest
ly recommend that all the suggestions
which he has made with respect to these
lands shall be embodied In statutes and.
especially, that the withdrawals already
made shall be validated so far as neces
sary and that doubt as to the authority
of the secretary of the Interior to with
draw lands for the purpose of submitting
recommendations as to future disposition
of them where new legislation is needed
shall be made complete anil unquestioned.
Disposition of Forest Reserves.
The forest reserves of the United
States, some 190,000.000 acres In extent, are
under the control of the department of
agriculture, with authority adequate to
preserve Ihem and to extend their growth
so far as that may he practicable. The
importance of the maintenance of our
forests cannot be exaggerated. The possi
bility of a scientific treatment of forests
so that they shall be made to yield a
large return in timber without really re
ducing the supply has been demonstrated
in other countries, and we should work
toward the standard set by them as far
as their methods are applicable to our
conditions.
Upwards of four hundred millions acres
of forest land in this country are in pri
vate ownership, but only three per cent,
of it is being treated scientifically and
with a view to the maintenance of the
forests. The part played by the forests
in the equalization of the supply of water
on watersheds ts a matter of discussion
and dispute, but the general benefit to be
derived by the public from the extension
of forest lands on watersheds and the
promotion of the growth of trees In
places that are now denuded and that
once had great nourishing forests, goes
without saying. The control to be exer
cised over private owners in their treat
ment of the forests which they own is a
matter for state and not national regu
lation, because there is nothing in the
constitution that authorizes the federal
government to exercise any control over
forests within a state, unless the forests
are owned in a proprietary way by the
federal government
Improvement of River.
I come now to the Improvement of the
inland waterways. He would be blind
indeed, who did not realize that the peo
ple of the far west, and especially those
of the Mississippi valley, have been
aroused to the need there Is for the Im
provement of our inland waterways.
The Mississippi ri-er. with the Missouri
on the one hand and the Ohio on thp
other, would seem to offer a great nat
ural means of Interstate transportation
and traffic. How far. if properly Improved
When hunters used to chase coyotes
on horses and with dogs there was
never a record of where they drove
the coyotes to their dens. But it is
different with automobiles.
Coyotes run until they are about to
be taken in and then make for their
dens In order to "smoke them out"
the driver attaches a rubber tube to
the gas tank of his car and runs the
other end down in the hole. That soon
brings the coyote out, an& the race is
resumed until the animal is bagged.
Chicago News.
they would relieve the railroads or sup
plement them In respect to the bulkier
and cheaper commodities is a matter of
conjecture. Xo enterprise ought to ba
undertaken the cost of which is not def
initely ascertained and the benefit and
advantage of which are not known and
assured by competent engineers and other
authority. When, however, a project at
a definite character for the Improvement
of a waterway has been developed SO
that the plans have been drawn, the cost
definitely estimated, and the traffic
which will be accommodated is reason
ably probable I think It is the duty ot
congress to undertake the project and
make provision therefor in the proper ap
propriation bill.
One of the projects which answers tha
description I have given Is that of intro
ducing dams Into the Ohio river from
Pittsburg to Cairo, so as to maintain at
all seasons of the year, by slack water,
a depth of nine feet. Upward of seven
of these dams have already been con
structed and six are under construction,
while the total required Is 50. The re
mainlng cost is known to be $63,000,000.
It seems to nie that in the developmerl
of our inland waterways it would II
wise to begin with this particular projetl
and carry It through as rapidly as maj
be. I assume from reliable Informatiol
that It can be constructed economlcallj
in ten years. I recommend, therefore
that the public lands, in river and har
hor bills, make provision for continuing
contracts to complete this improvement,
and 1 shall recommend in the future, if
it be necessary, that bonds be Issued to
carry it through.
What has been said of the Ohio river
is true in a less complete way of the im
provement of the upper Mississippi from
St. Paul to St. Iouis to a constant depth
of six feet, and of the Missouri, from
Kansas City to St. Louis to a constant
deptii of six feet and from St. Loui3 to
Cauo of a depth of eight feet. These
projects have been pronounced practical
by competent boards of army engineers,
their cost lias been estimated and there
is bus.ness wlucn will follow the im
provement. As tiiese Improvements are being made,
and the traffic encouraged by them shows
tself of sufficient importance, the im
provement of the Mississippi beyond
Cairo down to the gulf, which is now
going on with the maintenance of a depth
of nine feet everywhere, may be changed
to another and greater depth If the neces
sity for It shall appear to arise out of the
traffic which can be delivered on the river
at Cairo.
Cheap Rail Rate Necessary.
I am informed that the investigation
by the waterways commission In Europe
shows that the existence of a waterway
by no means assures traffic unless there
is traffic adapted to water carriage at
cheap rates at one end or the other of
the stream. It also appears in Europe
that the depth of the streams Is rarely
more than six feet, and never more than
nine. But it is certain that enormous
quantities of merchandise are transported
over the rivers and canals in Germany
and France and England, and it Is also
certain that the existence of such meth
ods of traffic materially affects the rates
which the railroads charge, and it is the
best regulator of those rates that we
have, not even excepting the govern
mental regulation through the interstate
commerce commission. For this reason,
I hope that this congress will take such
steps that it may be called the Inaugu
rator of the new system of inland water
ways. For' reasons which it is not nec
essary here to state, congress has seen
fit to order an investigation into the in
terior department .and the forest service
of the agricultural department. The re
sults of that Investigation are not needed
to determine the value of. and the ne
cessity for. the new legislation which I
have recommended in respect to the pub
lic lands and in respect to reclamation. I
earnestly urge that the measures be tak
en up and d'sposed of promptly without
awaiting the investigation which has been
determined upon.
WILLIAM H. TAFT.
A Bird's Savings Bank.
In California the woodpecker stores
acorns away, although he never eats
them. He bores several holes, differ
ing slightly in size, at the fall of the
year, invariably in a pine tree. Then
he find an acorn, which he adjusts to
one of the holes prepared for its re
ception But he does not eat the acorn, for,
as a rule, he is not a vegetarian. His
object is storing away the acorns ex
hibits foresight and a knowledge of
results more akin to reason than to
instinrt. The succeeding winter the
acorns remain intact, but, becoming
saturated, are predisposed to decay,
when they are attacked by maggots,
which seem to delight in this special
food.
It is than that the woodpecker
reaps the harvest his wisdom has pro
vided, at a time when, the ground be
ing covered with snow, he would ex
perience a difficulty otherwise in ob
taining suitable or palatable food.
His "Penitentiary Den."
"And now I must show you what I
rail my penitentiary den," said a popu
lar author. "This." he continued, as
he drew open a door, "is where I oc
casionally spend an hour or fo when I
am developing symptoms of that by no
means uncommon malady among suc
cessful men railed 'swelled head.' "
The room was a charming little
snuggery about seven feet square, the
only remarkable feature of which was
the wall-covering. "If you look close
ly." explained the host, "you will see
that my wall paper consists, on two
sides of the rom, of those too-familiar
and unwelcome printed forms on
which editors express their regrets at
declining one's pet manuscripts."
Zoological Puzzle.
Italian zoologists have a puzzle to
solve, owing to the discovery on
Mount Blanc of the body of a white
bear, which has been brought to Aosta.
It was thought at first that the hear
must have died some three hundred
years ago, and must have been pre
served by the ice, since it has always
been held that white bears vanished
from the Alps three centuries ago. But
it has since been demonstrated that
death could only hdve taken place a
tew days previous to discovery. At
this would seem to show that there
are still white bears in the Alps, ex
peditions are to be sent to test the
theory.
Tooly Lural!
"How far is it between these two
towns?" asked the lawyer.
"About four miles as the flow
cries." replied the witness.
"You mean as the cry flows."
"No." put in the judge, "he means
as the fly crows "
And they all looked at each other,
feeling that something was wrong.
Everybody's Magazine.
Carver of Figureheads.
William Southworth. the city's old
est wood carver, died the other day
at the age of S3 years He estimated
only a short time before his death,
that he had made carvings for more
than 500 vessels His principal work
was the carving of figureheads for
vessels, this beinfc' a lucrative and lm
portant occupation at one time, until
the rise of commercialism blotted out
the poetic significance of these
models. Bath Correspondence of Lew
iston (Me.) Journal
Eiaam shoigs
NEEDED THE KNIFE.
Speaking of table etiquette some
time ago, Gen. E. Burd Grubb told a
story about a man who was justified in
eating pie with a knife. Smith was
standing in a hotel lobby one day, ac
cording to the general, talking to
Jones, when the conversation turned
to a dinner that had been given at the
borne of a mutual acquaintance named
drown.
"You should have seen Barton," re
marked Jones, referring to one of the
guests. "I thought he had better table
manners. When his pie was served he
actually ate it with his knife."
"I don't blame him for that." was
the startling reply of Smith.
"You don't blame him?" repeated
Jones in amazement.
"Xo." smilingly said Smith. "I have
eaten pie at Brown's myself, and it is
a wonder to me that Barton didn't take
an ax."
Reason Enough.
Mrs. Newlywed (weeping) Henry,
I am sure I have grounds for divorce
1 am positive that you have deceived
me
Mr. Newlywed What in the world
do j-ou mean? What have I done to
arouse such a suspicion?
Mrs. Newlywed (weeping harder)
I I saw a memorandum in your
pocket this morning to to buy some
new ribbons for your typewriter.
Judge.
The Fly in the Amber.
"That man Urindle is a wonderfully
interesting fellow. He has traveled
so much and so far, and be is so high
ly cultured that it is always a pleasure
to listen to him."
"No doubt. But I must confess I
was just a little disappointed."
"Disappointed? Why so?"
"I noticed that when he pronounced
the word Copenhagen he gave the 'a'
the long sound.
The New Butler.
Mr. Stubb I am so glad we can af
lord to keep that new butler, John. He
has been employed by the first fam
ilies of the town and is a regular well
of information.
Mr. Stubb Yes, Maria, but you'll
find him a dry well.
Mra. Stubb Dry well?
Mr. Stubb Yes; he can't be pumped.
WHEN SHE REALLY "ARRIVES."
A woman may never be properly
classed as a social favorite until the
society editors begin writing about her
something' like this:
"Owing to numerous social affairs
arranged in her honor, Mrs. Clarissa
Maye Johnes, who has spent the past
month in Bunktown, will prolong her
visit to that beautiful city for some
weeks."
The Accent.
When some hair-dressers seek to give
Us hair to fit the hat.
We get er-rat-ic coiffures with
i The accent on the rat.
A Judicial Process.
"Prosy old Judge Talkit got hold of
Smythe the other day and treated the
poor fellow to a regular judicial pro
ceeding." "What was it?"
"First, he arrested his progress and
then he tried his patience."
Sounds Appetizing.
Journal I wonder if moths have
any preference as to textile fabrics?
"I should think cheesecloth would
make tasty eating," responded the
other part' to the conversation.
Turning On the Faucet No Use.
Mrs. Wynn Do you ever get things
you want by weeping? I do.
Mrs. Glynn No. My dear, with
my husband tears are not worth their
salt.
Decollete.
Lady in Box. Can you look over
my shoulder?
Man from Country I've just been
lookin over both of 'em, by gosh,
they're all right!
Adam's Excuse.
His Wife This paper says that a
man's hair turns gray five years earli
er than a woman's does.
Her Husband If it does I'll bet a
woman is the cause of it.
A Puzzle.
Mrs. Crimsonbeak I saw a new
puzzle in the paper to-night. John.
Mr. Crimsonbeak Oh, has the rail
road company changed its time table
again? Yonkers Statesman.
Heroic rremedy.
Bill I believe I talk altogether too
much.
Jill Well, why don't you stop it?
"How can 1?"
"Why, get married!" Yonkers
Statesman.
Knew Biikins.
"I presume Mrs. Biikins is listening
to a great many barefaced lies thesj
days."
"Why do you think so?"
"Biikins has shaved off his mus-ache."
WHAT THE RADIATOR SINGS.
What Is the song that the radiator sings?
Is it a melody from throbbing reeds of
Pan?
A sweet song of summer shine and all
the fabled things
That sport upon Arcadian meadows
never seen by man?
Or chill fall's cicada notes a-rattling from
ragged throats?
What Is the son? that the radiator sings?
Is It the rumbling of bumble bees that
boom?
A splashing brooklet washing through the
clover land that tlings
Its sparkling spray in splendor on the
morning glory's bloom? '
Or anvil chimes at Vulcan's forge and
tempests in a mountain gorge?
SOUR AND SWEET.
Flora Jack, I'm surprised at you
and after kissing Miss Chimsonbeak!
Jack Hush! That is my excuse. I
must have something sweet to take
away the taste.
Queer Language.
And when the fisher leaves the pool
And gladly home doth hie.
We get some li-kely stories with
The accent on the lie.
Down on the Farm.
New Arrival What time do the
summer boarders begin to thin out
down here?
Farmer Ryetop Wall, neighbor,
they get thinner and thinner every
week until about the last of Septem
ber they are so thin they cut the
hammocks through and then we ship
them back to town."
Waiters have the Palms.
"I'm sure I don't know why they
cal this hotel The Palms. Do you?
I've never seen a palm anywhere near
the place."
"You'll see them before you go. It's
a pleasant little surprise the waiters
keep for the guests on the last day
of their sojourn." Puck.
Rather Strenuous.
Mr. Cassidy Awn will yez listen to
this, Nora? A Baltimore man hugged
his woife so toightly on th' golden
wedding thot he broke two av her
ribs.
Mrs. Cassidy Ah, Patrick, awn
isn't ut grand to see such affection
after all thim years?
It Gets There.
Manager Why do you call this play
"Dust?"
Playwright Because I want it to
get in the public eye.
Just Gossip.
"Mrs. Tewkly says she would like to
join an aero club."
"Well, the Lord knows, she's flighty
enough!"
Very Probably.
"Was it a heated debate you at
tended?" "It ought to have been. It had
enough hot air in it."
HOT STUFF.
Clergyman I don't see your hus
band with you so much as when you
were on your honeymoon. Has he
grown cool?
Late Bride Not if what sou preach
is true. He's dead.
A Misnomer.
I wonder why a lion cub
Is always called the J-on's whelp?
But more than that l wonder why
Our servant girls are called "The
Help?"
Ennui.
"They must be people of great
wealth."
"What makes you think so?"
"Why, even the baby looks bored."
An Easy Mark.
"It's a pity Henry Hudson can't be
in New York now."
"If he were there he would prob
ably get his pockets picked."
His Only Recreation.
"But why do you give your fash
ionable butler an entire day off everj
week?" asked the friend.
"Sh!" whispered the man who made
a fortune in a few weeks. "It is the
only opportunity I have to sit in mj
shirt sleeves and smoke. Wouldn't
dare to do it when he wus around."
. 1 1
h 14 TI
The Way of the World.
"Faktn boasts that he has all the
gems of literature in his library."
"3o he has, but they are uncu.
genjii. '
CHICAGO MERCHANT
BAKES STATEMENT.
After Spending1 Thousands of SoIIart
and Consulting the Host Eminent
FhysiciaTH, Tfa Was Desperate.
CHICAGO, ILLS Mr. J. G.
Becker, of 134 Van Buren St., a
well-known wholesale dry goods
dealer, states as follows:
"I have had catarrh for mors
than thirty years. Have tried
everything on earth and spent
thousands of dollars for other
medicines and with physicians,
without getting any lasting re
lief, and can say to you that I
have found Peruna the only rem
edy that has cured me per
manently. "Peruna has also cured my
wife of catarrh. She always keeps
it in the house for an attack of
cold, which it invariably cures in
very short time."
KOW-KURE
is not a "food" it is a medicine, and the
only medicine in the world for cows only.
Made for the cow and, as itsname indicates.
a cow cure. Barrenness, retained after
birth, abortion. scours, caked udder, and all
similar affections positively and quickly
cured. No one who keeps cows, whether
many or few, can afford to be without KOW
KURE. It is made especially to keep cows
bealthv. Our book "Cow Money" sent FKEE.
Ask your local dealer for KOW-KUKK or bend
to the manufacturers.
DAIRY ASSOCIATION CO. Lyndonvllle. VL
Nebraska Directory
After Curing Yourself tff
CONSTIPATION
by using
Uncle Sam
Breakfast Food
You will continue to use it
because it is a delightful
breakfast dish.
If you don't know it's merits
ask your grocer
He Certainly Knows
JOHN DEERE PLOWS
ARE THE BEST
r ASK TOUU LOCAL DEALER Oft
yJOHN DEERE PLO CO., OMAHA. NEB.
2-Ib.Red
Cans
Paxton's
SEllllslSi
tmvmi
Per lb. 25c
2-Ib. Air-tight Sealed Cans
Positively the highest value
you can get anywhere for
the money. You know
you are always getting the
same when you buy
PAXTON'S Gas Roasted
in red sealed cans.
Ask Your Grocer
for It
ESILURDHSTEL
nail
jias Sts.
American S2.00 par day nnd upwards.
European SI.OO par day and upwards.
fimaaya Take Dodge Street Car
at Union Depot.
ROME MILLER
TYPEWRITERS &U
H Ut H 3llr" price. Ciu.Ii or time p.
raenis. InteI.reatap:ir. Whl
aay wfcere (or free examination. No da
(wit Wrlir'hrblf'wrjmiali.t.-xt.ff'r
a.rj)nmaa r...4ii friau r-- riw
D TAFT'S DENTAL ROOMS
1517 Douglas St., OMAHA, DEB.
Reliable Dentistry at Mso'trass I
Airds ft Animals L Mounted
J. E. WALLACE, Taxidermist and Furrier
020 Lake Streat OMAHA. NEB.
nCCIlNOC CTIBflU for starching
tnesl linens.
Save the Baby Use
i
m ttST KiWVQll TOR 1SMbB1
Should be given at once when the
little one coughs. It heels the del
icate throat and protects the lungs
from infection guaranteed safe and
very pals;able.
AH Drufftats. 25 cents.
fTeSfr
li.-ei
ffl Z a I
Hd
