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GLANCING OVER THE LIST.
of people who have had satisfactory photographs taken here is like looking over s
society directory. If any better photographs were to be bad anywhere these peo-
P e Would Go There For Their Photographs.
The fact that they come here themselves, and send their friends, indicates that
nor claim that we make the beBt photographs to be had is jostled. Come and
jndge for yourself. DeHART STUDIO.
Retains Health by Fasting.
To prove that complete abstinence
from food for indefinite periods is not
only conducive to good health but also
to perennial youth. Miss Claire de
Servalniece of the famous "fasting"
Dr. Tanner, is submitting herself to a
remarkable series of experiments at
the Royal Charite hospital in Berlin.
Miss Serial ended at noon the other'
day in perfect health a fast of tec
days, without nourishment of any
kind, either-liquid or solid. During
that time she lived in a glass cage,
into which fresh air was pumped by
a motor. She was then "removed from
the cage and placed in the ordinary
ward, but she intends to" abstain from
food for another 20 days, living in the
meantime on mineral water. Her
weight has decreased from 114 pounds
to 101 pounds,' but her condition other
wise is perfectly normal. She stated,
at the end of the tenth day, that she
never once felt ill from lack of food
and drink, and was entirely free from
fever or headache. The young lady
says that she was induced to become
a "faster" in order to cure herself of
chronic headaches and lack of appe
tite, and also because she finds she
emerges rejuvenated after a period of
self-imposed starvation.
Beri-Beri and Hari-Kari.
The busy man, who only has time to
read the headlines of a newspaper,
hustled up to a bunch of his friends the
other day with the remark: "Remark
able case, that. Very seldom you ever
hear of a Chinaman committing sui
cide." "I should say it is," said one of
the friends, "Did a Chinaman commit
suicide?" "Yes, indeed; fellow commit
ted beri-beri down at Point Breeze. He
was a sailor." "Indeed? 1 was always
under the impression that beri-beri was
a disease, and not a method of self-destruction."
"Not on your life," said the
busy one; "beri-beri is one of the most
horrible forms of suicide known. At
this juncture another in the group re
marked: "Don't get beri-beri confused
with hari-kari. Hari-kari is a way to
commit suicide, but beri-beri is a trop
ical disease." "Now, there's just where
you're wrong," said the wise one
"Hari-kari is the Japanese word for
suicide, but beri-beri is the Chinese
name." It was several hours before
they finally convinced him of his mis
take. Dramatic Protest in Church.
In a Northumberland (Eng.) coast
village chapel recently the preacher
referred to Christ's fishermen dis
ciples as "rough, ignorant, uncouth
types of men." "Hey, stop that, mis
ter," dramatically interrupted a lish
erman worshiper. "Don't tall: that
way about fishermen," continued the
interrupter, who went on to loudly de
clare that they were as good as those
in any other walk of life. Congrega
tion and preacher were .alike so sur
prised at the incident that the man de
livered his protest unchecked. The
pastor afterwards resumed his ser
mon. Something That Survived.
"It is my ambition," paid the earnest
young man. "to wiite something that
will be handed down to posterity."
"Well," answered Fanner Corntos
sel, "all I have to say is be careful
how you go about it. My grandfather
wrote his name to a mortgage on his
farm and it looks as if my grandchil
dren will have to go ahead struggling
with it"
, India Victims of Tigers.
The ferocity of the tiger can be
seen from the fact that according to a
recent writer he is made responsible
for 37 per cent of the human beings
killed by the wild animals of Hindus
tan. The writer adds that once a
tiger has tasted human flesh he is sat
isfied with nothing else, and that in
southern India one of these man-eat
ing tigers has devoured 200 human
beings.
Guarding Against Earthquakes.
All ijreat crises have stimulated the
creative faculty of mankind, and
earthquakes have, of course, earned a
full share of attention! The most
original notion in this connection was
put forth by a genius who quite satis
fied himself that if houses were pro
vided with wheels or rollers they
would move about backwards and for
wards during an earthquake and es
cape disaster.
FRISCHHOLZ BROS.
SHOES
CLOTHING X
Gents' Furnishing Goods
RELIABLE GOODS AT
RIGHT PRICES.
FRISCHHOLZ BROS.
405 11th Street,
Mr. Chamberlain as the Butler. -
The foreign office staff of the king's
house service messengers has just lost
one of its members, to whose nick
name. "Sir Joseph," a story belongs. It
occurred when Mr. Chamberlain was
at the colonial office. .. .
One night, or rather -very early In
the morning, the messenger Awas sent
to Prince's Gardens with animportant
"cabinet circulation." 'MrrCbamberlaln
was working late and' had sent all his
servants to bed, and the messenger had
to wait a long time before getting an
answer to his knock.
At last he gave a thundering rat-tat
and presently had the satisfaction of
seeing some one whom he supposed to
be the butler appear in answer to his
call, wearing a plain smoking jacket
and smoking a clay pipe. "Oh," said
the messenger, "you have come at last
have you? There's no hurry. It's only
a message from the prime minister."
The "butler" smiled serenely, and the
messenger, then recognizing his man,
stammered out: "I beg your pardon
Sir Joseph, I have a dispatch box foi
you."
Redeemed Life by Death.
An honorable burial, the reward foi
an honorable death, was accorded S
Jf.Frooman, a convict, who died in the
San Queutin prison, California, re
cently, from injuries received while
bravely fighting the -fire In the peniten
tiary. Prooman displayed a reckless
gallantry during that exciting period
When the call came for volunteers, he
was among the first to step out It
was his one opportunity to retrieve
his dishonored name, to clear himself
of the taint of a criminal being, tc
take his place as a man among men
He lived in dishonor, but died a man,
and for his manner of death was bur
ied as a man in San Rafael cemetery,
not as a criminal in a convict grave
This will be the only satisfaction to his
wife and daughter, who are In Europe
and unaware of his crimes and hh
death. He was convicted for forgerj
and would have been released In 1911
The expenses of his funeral were paid
by the guards of the prison.
Hard to Understand.
"What's Johnny been doing?" asked
the patient father.
"He had an altercation with the
neighbors' children, was warned bj
the police, broke the cellar window
tried to put a cartridge in the furnace
and that's ail I can think of just now.
"It's absolutely marvelous, isn't it?
"What is?"
"That anybody should have thi
nerve to kidnap a small boy!"
Vivisection.
"In the agony of death a dog hat
been known to caress his master, am
every one has heard of the dog suf
fering under vivisection, who lickei
the hand of the operator; this man
unless the operation was fully justi
fied by an increase of our knowledge
or unless he had a heart of stone
must have felt remorse to the las
hour of his life." "Descent of Man,
Auuletou's. 190C edition, page 70.
Cvery Town In County "Dry.
Little Yates has the distinction ot
being the only county in the state that
is absolutely "dry." Every town In
the county has voted no license. The
village of Penn Yan, the county cap
ital, will use "cold tea" as a regular
beverage for the first time in 30 years.
Yates is the smallest county in the
state, and the tourist can cross It in
either direction before he gets very
thirsty without exceeding the speed
limit Utica (N. Y.) Press.
A Glimmer of the Truth.
Asked to write a report of a lecture
on '-'Phases of Human Life Youth,
Manhood and Old Age," a young Eng
lish girl produced: "In youth we look
forward to the wicked things we will
do when we grow up this Is the state
of innocence. In manhood we do the
wicked things of which we thought In
our youth this is the prime of life.
In old -age we are sorry for the wicked
things we did in manhood this is the
time of our dotage."
And How Few Do!
Man's chief wisdom consists in
knowing his follies. Rochefoucauld.
And the Proper One.
The road leading to justice is the
safest Hesiod.
I
Columbus.
JOLLYING A JOKER
YOUNG WOMAN GOT EVEN WITH
MERRY JESTER. "
Had to tit Up Lato to Do It, but the
Trick Was Accomplished
Victim's Rather Lame "
Excum tor Call.
To start with Robert L. Beck Is
the most diligent -practical joker in
Cleveland aad environs, with the one
possible exception of 'Johnny Bren
nan. ' Among the regular victims of
Beck's jokes and Jests are a crowd of
young women, friends of his wife.
A pair of these young women 'lowed
one evening that they would get
square with Beck. The joke they
planned required them to sit up far
beyond their bedtime, but they didn't
let that prey on their minds.
At about 1:20 a. m. Beck was
aroused from a sound -sleep by the
ringing of tho telephone. He crawled
out of bed, yawnfully. took down the
receiver, and learned that a woman
relative cousin or something of that
sort was lying critically ill at her
home in the other end of town.
Beck, then fully. awake, inserted
himself quickly into his trousers and
other things, and hustled out to wait
for an owl car.
He had some difficulty getting in at
the harce of his relative. Everybody
seemed to be sleeping just as soundly
as he had been up to the time that his
telephone tang. It began to dawn
on him that perhaps he didn't have a
monopoly on the practical joke" game
in this community. At last a servant
came to the door, tl was then just
2:"0 o'clock.
Beck inquired how everybody was.
The servant, wonderingly, replied that
everybody had retired in the best ot
health. But why? Was any one there
supposed to be ill?
Beck was on, when he heard that
He was Indeed the victim of a joke.
But a man does not like to admit that
he Is a joker's victim. And in this in
stance he didn't think it was wise to
have his relative shocked by the news
tlrnt her state of health was a mattei
of telephone discussion in the middle
of the night
"O, no, I didn't think anybody was
sick," Beck told the servant "Just tell
the family that I was walking by, and
thought I'd drop in and inquire how
they were. No, no, didn't want any
thing special. Just took a notion tc
drop in. don't you know. Well. I must
be off. Beautiful night, isn't It?"
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
KAS
A PEP.SISTENT HOODOO.
W.r. Oliver J. Goslington Gives a Faint
Outline of the Troubles That
Pursue Him.
"I don't know why It is," said Mr.
Goslington, "but when I travel I al
ways seem to get the worst of it in
some way; if there's anything going
that isn't pleasant it comes to me.
"Yesterday I made a little trip to a
place about fifty miles from the city.
I went to the station early to get a
seat by a window. I managed that all
right; I got a window seat and just
where I wanted, not at the end of the
car, but about two-thirds back from
the front,, where I would ride easy and
at the same time have something to
look at ahead, and of course that all
pleased me very much.
"At the first station out there got
aboard the car at the forward end
seven men, a very assorted lot'of men,
some tall, some short, some thick,
some thin, and among them one man
of phenomenal proportions, a giant of
a man, with legs sticking out beneath
and a head projecting up on top, and
then. I watched with fearful interest
the procession as it started down the
car, for I was seized with, a mortal
terror that the big' man would want
to sit with me. Really he ought not
to, for I sat two-thirds of the way
down the car and there were plenty ol
vacant seats ahead; but you never can
tell about a thing till it's settled.
"I watched that procession coming
with a great and fearful interest the,
big man bringing up the rear, and'
then with increasing hopefulness I
saw It dwindle as one members-after
another of it dropped out to take the
first seat he came to, until all were
seated except the giant, who was left
alone still four rows In front of me
and with three vacant seats in those
four rows to choose from, and then
my hope ran high, but he kept a-com-ing
and passed them all until he came
to mine, where he halted.
'"Is this seat taken?' he said to
me, and what could I say but:
'"No, sir,' .and then he sat down,
sitting partly on that vacant place in
the seat and partly on Oliver J. Gos
lington. "So I drew the fat -man after all;
but things like that happen to me
whenever I travel."
Mortgage an a Cat
A mortgage on a cat ia not often
heard of. However, the other day
there was filed la the recorder's ofllce
a chattel mortgage the consideration
of which was f i. The property oa
which the money waa secured waa de-"
scribed ss s "cat called John." Co
lumbus Dispatch.
Precautions Against Rats.
The owners of grata godowas sad
warehouses ia Calcutta are compelled
by municipal regulation to pave with
concrete to prevent the isgress of
rats, which, it is believed, will aid ma
terially in the extermination of this
active distributor of the plague germ.
No Pries Limit
If a young man develops a first
class business ability he needn't both
er about a fortune, His professional
talents will lad employment at rates
which will make the. possession of a
fortune superfluous. Saturday Even
ing Post
Revislen.
- "Now." said the distinguished rep
resentative, "we have arranged" the
tarlS precisely ss it should be sad all
yon have to-do ia to say 'Amen.'"
"No." answered the distinguished
slor. "not 'smea;' 'amend." V
HOT WATER
HEATING
For tht Fam Ihm
All the comforts of
town life can now be
had on the farm. ,
Heat the house with
hot water, and get the
maximum amount of
comfort at a minimum
cost v The day of the
base burner in the
country home is rapid
ly passing:
WHY NOT HAVE THE BEST
The time to install a heating
plant is from now on. -
One- installed, they last a life
time. Coiiih in and let us tell you
about it, or drop us a card stating
what yon wnut.
ft. DUSSELL & SOI
Plumbing and Hot Water
Heating
1 COLUMBUS, NEB.
SCREENS
Now is the season for screens.
Leave your order with us. We
make any size yon want,. r
If you are goiug to build, get onr
figures.
BED. F. I0NLER
Contractor and Builder
lad. Tel. 3051 Shop 13th and Adams
FRITZ W. A. PAUL
Professor sf Music
Violin and Piano, all Brass and lteed Instru
ments. At home for intending students Tuesdays
and Fridays, 2 to 1 p. m.,at No. 1018 Washington
Avenue.
Telephone, Bell Mack s7rt. P. . Box 541
Improvements on Cid Sayings.
"Never do things by halves.n unless
yon open oysters. Whatever Is worth
doing at all is worth doing well. Let
your motto be "Excelsior!" Single out
some specialty for which you have
genius, then devote yourself to it thor
oughly, and you won't have to look for
a job, the job will be looking for you.
The most brilliant men are often la
mentable failures. Be thorough! Stick
like the postage stamp till you get
there. Dogged does It.
Hollanders Heavily Taxed.
All told, a Hollander pays about 12
per cent of his yearly income foi
taxes. He is taxed for his business
income, for the interest he collects,
on his house rent, his - furniture, on
six fireplaces and all the stoves in the
house he rents or owns, on his horses,
bicycle and servants. On an income
of 2,400 a year he pays $298.
Fewer Distilleries in Sweden.
Fifty years ago there were 23,000 dis
tilleries in Sweden, but that number
has now been reduced to 132.
Musical.
The rattle of pans and dishes In the
kitchen sounds better 4han classical
music to a hungry man.
Use for Electric Heating Devices.
Electric heating devices are success
fully employed for branding cigai
boxes.
By-Product of Coal.
Pigments of more than 400 different
colors are secured from coal.
PILES! PILES! PILES!
Williams' Indian. Pile Ointment will cure
Blind, Bleeding and Itching Piles. It absorbs
the tumors, allays Itching at once, acts as a poul
tice, gives instant relief. William' Indian Pile
Ointment is prepared for Piles and itching of the
private parts. Sold by druggists, mail iiOc and
81.00. Williams' M'f'g. Do.. Props.. Cleveland. O
WHY NOT TRY
THE PACIFIC HOTEL
COLUMBUS, NEB.
The big brick hotel -one and one
half blocks sonth ot west depot cross
ing. 25 rooms at 25c; 20 rooms at 50c;
meals, 25c,
HARRY MUSSELMAN, Pjtf ritt.r
j - ---
COLUMBUS
MEAT MARKET
We invite all who desire choice
steak, and the .very best cuts of
all other meats to call at .our
. market on Eleventh street. We
also handle poultry and fish and
oysters m season.
S. E. MARTY & CO.
Telephone No. 1. - Columbus. Neb.
, Itching or Psoriasis
"TriTW A Vm Blanchard's Eczema
KJiAKtlll Lotion
Prof. J. BUnchanLBkin Specialist. 3811 Cot
tejm Grove Ave- Chicago, will diagnose joar
akia disease FBKE. also giTe advice and state
hew the disease will act and disappear under ase
of his lotion.
How many are there that can do this? Write
for syaptom blank. His Lotion is sold at L. H.
Leary's, Colombos, Neb.
r
wanted
The right party cam
I
secure an excellent position, salary
or commission for Columbae and vi
cinity. State age, former occapatioa
and give reference. Address LOCK
BOX 438, Lincoln, Neb.
I
J
IRISH BLOOD. IPLQJAZ UNO.
Many Mexicans Found with Had Hair
ami Real Hibernian rogue
and Names.
"The Mexicans are a dark-skinned
race, but in the crowd's of idlers who
watch the passing train at every rail
road station you will be sure to sea
pne or more faces of truly Irish cast,
surmounted by shocks .of vtouseled
brick-red hair," said a man who had
fust returned from a long trip through
.Diaz's republic. "The reason for this
Isn't far to seek. When the Mexican
railroads were built, twenty or thirty
years ago, it was an army of Irish la
borers who dug the dirt, laid the ties
and spiked down the steel. They
mixed with the native population, na
turally, and the red-headed hybrid with
a pug nose and perpetual grin Is the
result.
"I remember one place in particular
where I saw one of these carrot,
topped Irish-Mexicans who had such
a Hibernian face that I felt sure .at
once he must be'an exile from Erin
who bad gone broke' In 'the hurt of the
Montezumas. It was at' a station
called Apizaco, on the Mexican railway
the line that leads from the capital
to Vera Cruz, a road that was built by
an Irishman who grew rich and be
came a Mexican citizen. This man was
selling gaudily painted and carved
canes, for which this station is famous
all over the1 'country. He was dressed
In the usual two-piece suit loos6
blouse and trousers of white cotton
ragged and dirty. His red head was
covered by a tattered 'straw sombrero,
and his feet were bare like all the
other peons. When he came up to me
with his canes I spoke to him in Eng
lish. He grinned at me and replied in
Spanish that he did not understand.
So I went back at him In Mexican:
" 'Aren't you Irish?' What Is your
name?' I asked.
" 'SI, senor,' he replied in the formal
Spanish phrases that even the Indians
there use, 'my name is Innocente Je
sus O'Rourke.' And he said it, with
a brogue that, aside from his looks
was his sole ancestral inheritance."
COURTESY ALONE WILL NOT DO
Old Negroes of the South Are Extreme
ly Polite, But Woefully
Incompetent.
When the southern woman opened
the door in answer to the bell the old
colored man bowed and smiled, and
said softly in the courteous southern
brogue: "I've come fo' the does
Bertha done sent me."
The southern woman siehed as she
looked at him. "Tell Bertha I'm sorry,'
said she, "but I've given my clothes to
a white woman. Bertha is so nice. She
has washed for me for four years, but
she kept the clothes so long and she
got them so blue I had to change,. I'm
sorry."
The old colored man, how worn hit
clothes were! bowed again. "That's alj
right," he said; "that's all right. I'll
tell BeHha. She'll be sorry, too, Ber
tha will. She's been washing fo' you
so long. Bertha'U be ve'y sorry."
The southern woman shut the dooi
and came into the room, standing still
awhile, thinking. "
"So courteous," she said. "The only
genuine courtesy in the world, I think
is among those old negroes, but so in
competent. They are bound to be
weeded out. And still you can't heir,
being sorry. And I suppose nobody
will believe that the people who are
sorriest to see them supplanted by the
brisker white servants are the south
erners." Washington Star.
Man and His Dog.
He lies in front of me curled up be
fore the fire, as so many dogs must
have lain before so many fires. I sit
on one, side of that hearth as so man;
men must have sat by so man
hearths. Somehow this creature has
completed my manhood; somehow, 1
cannot explain why, a man ought tc
have a dog. A man ought to have six
legs; those other four legs are part
of him. Our alliance is older thai:
any of the passing and priggish expla
nations that are offered of either of
us; before evolution was, we were
You can find it written in a book that
I am a mere survival of a squabble of
anthropoid apes, and. perhaps I am. -am
sure I have no objection. But my
dog knows I am a man, and you will
not find the meaning of that word
written in any book as clearly as it ia
written in his soul. G. K. Chesterton
in London News.
Teaching Nothing.
Dr. Howe, president of Case school,
Cleveland, never fails to express his
vexation when he has a student cal't
the zero of mathematics nothing. One
uf the students, Morgenthaler by name
would almost Invariably read an equa
tion like this, x plus y equals 0, as foi
lows: X plus y equals nothing." One
day Dr. Howe lost his long-enduring
patience. "See here, Morgenthaler, let
me show you the difference between
zero and nothing."
With this Dr. Howe wrote a big 0 od
the blackboard. V8 " h.e saId, "if
"zero." Then erasing the 0,'he added:
"And this is nothing." Lippincotfs.
Circumstances and Cases.
"I want you," said Mr. Dustin Stax,
"to show that this law is unconsti
tutional. Do you think you can man
age it?"
- "Easily," answered the attorney.
"Well, go ahead and get familiar
with the case."
"I'm already at home in it I know
my ground perfectly. It's the same
law you had me prove was consti
tutional two years ago."
Husbands Take Second Place Now.
In the day when women sat at home
and did needlework they may possibly
have had time to be interested in
their husbands' careers. To-day their
own careers moaopolize their atten
tion. London Ladies' Field.
The Only Alternative.
Mother (to her daughter) What Is
your father making such a row about
in the other room? Either tho doctor
has forbidden him to smoke or ha Is
now asklag him for your hand, Fils
gende Blaetter.
."..,-
m
- - .
Thi Great Annul Bill-Bunt Liwi Mum
Tails) MmllmimT Isritatsd, aad it best all
around Mower of its class ia tar world. .
' It was the first sicesasfol ball-baarisg sasshis oa the mar
kat, it has the laxgeet sals of any, aad its quality has aevsr boaa
approached by saw other maaufaeturer
The five oylinder blades art-rrncible steel, oil tampered aad
hardened, crucible steel dead knife, with self-sharp lag raised
edgefestnra, perfectly fitting caps aad soses, iaaariag aa easy
rnnaisg Mower, aad every detail of oeastructies) has been care
. folly carried oat
Finished ia aluminum aad gold, haadaoBMly decorated, aad
graceful in appearance.
JOHANNES & KRUMLAND
GREAT VOLCANO IN" SAMOA.
In
Eruption Nearly Four Years and
Has Emitted Enormous Maaa
of Molten Lava.
Letters recently received in this city
from people who, journeying across the
Pacific, made a stop at Samoa, give
some idea of the stupendous volcanic
outburst that is going oa in the island'
of Savii, German Samoa. Tbisvolcano
broke out three and a half years ago,
but it is so far away -from the usual
lines of travel across the Pacific that
but little has been learned of its activ
ity. It has been in .constant eruption
the whole of that time and '.must have"
thrown out a far more enormous mass
of molten matter than has any other
volcano within historic times. The
fiery river that flows from a great rent
in the side of the mountain Is eight
miles wide and has buried under its
lava about-sixty square miles of coun
try. 'The activity of the volcano and
the amount of the flow are increasing.
Hills 600 feet high have been sub
merged and valleys as deep have been
filled to their rims with the molten
rock. The outflow of the volcano has
been estimated to be at least 300,000
tons a minute. By the side of such a
mass as that, kept up steadily for more
than three years, the disgorgings of
Vesuvius would be no more than a
spoonful.
As the island of Savii Is very sparse-,
ly inhabited, evn by the natives, while
its white population consists of a few
missionaries and traders, there has
been but little damage to life or prop
erty in the neighborhood of the vol
cano. To the seismologist, however,
this island offers a fruitful subject for
study, although its remote situation
has as yet kept it out of the reach of
science.
HIS TALK VERY EDIFYING.
Minister's Parrot Guides an Old
Lady's Perverse Bird Into More
Decent Speech.
Rev. Philip C. Fletcher, the most
eloquent and popular of St Louis'
younger clergymen, was discussing
the other day the sermon wherein he
said he saw no harm in cosmetics'.
"What I meant in that sermon,
said Mr. Fletcher, smiling, "was that
a woman owed it to herself to make
the most of her looks. According tc
some people, I advised every woman
to lay on powder and paint with a
towel. I would never think of giving
such advice, of course. Such advice,
coming from the pulpit, would have a
strange sound as strange a sound as
the talk of the minister's parrot.
"A certain minister, you know,
called on an old lady, and found a
new parrot In her parlor. This parrot
kept saying every little while:
"'I wishUhe old girl would die!'
"The minister turned his head to
conceal a smile.
" 'But I think I can set this matter
right for you, dear madam,' he said
'I, too, have a parrot, as you know. It
is a veryc honest bird. Its talk is very
edifying I'll send it here; and it will
soon guide your own parrot into de
cent speech.'
"He sent on his parrot that evening
The grateful old lady put the birds
side by side. Then, with a pleased
smile, she prepared to listen to theii
conversation.
" 'I wish the old girl would die,' said
the parrot host.
"And 'the guest rolled his eyes and
declaimed solemnly
" 'We beseech. Thee to hear us, good
Lord!'"
He Had Reason to Flee.
This affidavit was filed in court of
common pleas in Dublin in 1822: "And
this deponent further saitb, that on
arriving at the home of the said de
fendant for the purpose of personall
serving him with the said writ, he, the
said deponent, knocked three several
times at the outer, commonly called
the hall door, but could not obtain
admittance; whereupon this deponent
was proceeding to knock a fourth
time, when a man, to this deponent
unknown, holding in his hands a mus
ket or blunderbuss, loaded with ballt
or slugs, "as this deponent' has "since
heard and verily believes, appeared al
one of the upper windows of the said
house, and presenting said musket oi
blunderbuss at this deponent, threat
ened 'that if said deponent did not in
stantly retire, he would send his (the
deponent's) soul to hell,' which thi
deponent verily believes he would
have done, had not this deponent pre
cipitately escaped."
Take a Cab.
A friend the other day came in bo
wailing the ruin done to her pretty
shoes, 'frock, hst, etc., by a heavy
shower, through having to wait for aa
omnibus. "You ought to have taken a
cab," I told her. The idea of such
extravagance quite appalled her; yet
more than the amount spent would
have been saved to her wearing ap
parel. This fallacy of judgment is
very common among women, I have
observed.
Hla Efrarta Wasted.
Lecturer on Art "Before I sit down
I shall be happy to answer any ques
tions that .any of you may wish to
ask." Gentleman (in audience) "I
have enjoyed the lecture much, sir.
and have understood it all except a
few technical terms. Will you please
tell me what you mean by the words
perspective, fresco, sad mlckto-asje-lo?"
v (Lecturer aits down discour
aged.) Chicago Tribune..
; . v
--
,- r
ECONOMY IN A LONDON INN.
"Dsuhtful" Fish. Served to
Quests Whs Have Cstd In
-n. WIG IffMgVo
Mr. Craig Wadswortk. one ot the
secretaries to the embassy st London,
tells how aa American, who waa Jour
neying through the midland counties
of England, encountered in a certain
town a rather pretentious inn,, at which
he ordered turbot--a favorite dish is
those parts. t
The American had had a few days of
dense fog, and hla appearance sad
manner perhaps showed that he had be
come a little wheesy in consequence ot
the climate. He was, ladeed. forced tc
have frequeat recourse to hla handker
chief. When the turbot was brought the
guest fancied, even before It reached
his plate, that it waa no longer fresh;
and an. attempt to eat it confirmed that
impression. He called the proprietor,
who at once sent a waiter for fresh
turbot and removed the objectloaable
dish.
"I beg your pardon, air," said tho
inn-keeper, "but we got the Ides, sir,
as you came In, that you 'ad a bad cold
in your 'ead, sir."
"And suppose I had? What would
that have to do with my being served
spoiled fish?" demanded the indignant
traveler.
"Heverythlnk, sir. We 'as this rule
in this 'ouse: Fish as is a little doubt
ful, like that 'ere, sir them which 'as
lost the flavor of youth, as I msy say
them we serves to parties aa appears
to 'ave colds In their 'ends, sir; and
we finds that bein' as such parties
can't smell nothlnk, they likes the
fish just as well, air, and boften they
prefers 'em! "Illustrated Sunday Mag
azine.
American Respect for Education.
There is something in America be
sides money and politics. America
realizes the importance of education
and the respect due to those who art
entrusted with the great work of pre
paring men for their part in life
When Dr. Eliot resigned the presi
dency of Harvard university the whole
country treated it aa an event of the
first importance and realized the re
sponsibility resting upon the overseen
in the selection of his successor.
When it cornea to the selection of a
governor, a senator, an ambassador,
a president even, Americans are care
less, for while their politicians may do
harm it is seldom lasting, but it is
different with the president of Har
vard. Only the man fitted by learning
and character and temperament ia
deemed worthy of being considered, ss
gr'eat is the respect in which the oflca
is held. Nation Review.
Seton'a Opinion of tho Wolf.
Ernest Thompson -Seton is reported
as saying:
"I think animals capable of a crude
form of thought that cannot be ex
plained as instinct. Among the wild
animals I regard the wolf as the most
intelligent, just as people regard vth
dog as most intelligent among the
domestic brutes. But a dog is noth
Jng but a wolf with a college educa
tion. The wolf has learned the dan
ger of the long-distance rifle, and evec
in districts where they are plentiful II
is rarely that man sees one. It can be
nothing short of reason that causes
the wolf, formerly so bold, to act in
this manner."
Keeping Up Appearances.
Husband (suddenly waking up at
dead of night) What in the world
was that noise?
Wife (calmly) It's all right, dear.
The guests of the Vanderbilt ball are
just coming home, and I slipped down
and gave our front door a slam, sc
the neighbors would think we wars
'there. New York Weeklv.
Large Stream of Meteors.
The August meteors, according to s
leading astronomer, form a stream so
broad that the earth, though it travels
faster than 18 miles a second, takes
seven weeks to cross it
EAT THEM LUCE CANDY.
No other remedy can be compared with
Rexall Orderlies for the easy, pleasant aad
successful treatment of constipation. Yoa
may have back the money you pay us for
them if they fail to satisfy yon. Eat them
like candy any time of day or night. They
don't gripe or cause any annoyance what
ever. Two sizes, ice. and 25c
TMETULE
WEST BOO II D.
No. 11 3.37 am
No. 13 1129am
No.1 9:43 am
No. 9 1149 am
No. 7 3:18 pm
No. 15 640 pm
No. 3 ........ SsMptm
No. 5 7jKpm
No.se 7jam
No. S3 3:00 pm
bast BomrB.
No. 4 ........ SsSSam
No. 12 4Jam
No.l4al222d lpm
No.6 2J8pm
No.tt &9Spm
No. IS 3:12 pm
No. 8 8:14 pm
No. 2 847 pm
No. 88 443 pm
No. 84 548 am
Koxroix.
No.77mxd. dSeam
No.2Spaa ..d7pm
No.30bm ..al2H5pm
No.78mzd..aSjWpm
arALBua a albiob.
No.79mxd..dS4Sam
No.Hpm ..d 148pm
No.3BpB ..al24Spm
Ne.88mxd..a74Spm
Daily ezeept Saaday.
BOTX:
No. 1. 2, 1 and 8 are extra fare ttaiaa.
Nos. 4.5, U aad Mare local pasawgan
Nea. 58 aad Mataloeal freights.
Noa. 9 aad tl at matt tnim only. .
No. 14 tee U Omaha 448 p.m. '
No. 8 do U Omaha 548 p.m.
3
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