The Columbus journal. (Columbus, Neb.) 1874-1911, February 24, 1909, Image 6

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

    rjSt$?S.5iZ "y
J--i'a;rr: -,.s
5 .5
t :
A 1
uvjWLnj--LruJ.- - - rj . j-n.nn.ruw
.... ..m,m.
lit: VlSliS A
(Coiiyrtelit. ISO?, by TV. G. Chapman.)
(Copyright in Great Uritsin.)
I have spent a good many terrible
nights, in my time, but I never spent
such a night as I did up the tree, the
night I .fired the nigger chasers into
the barbecue crowd in Africa, with
hyenas anil jackals sitting on their
haunches and looking up at us. lick
ing their chops, and yapping for us
fo come down and be chewed.
Once when I was quite a bit young
er, a party of us boys went to rob a
melon patch, and the farmer shot us
in the pants with rock salt, and chased
us up a tree, while the dogs stood at
the foot of the tree all night and
barked, and the salt in our wound?
was making us smart awful, but it
was not so dangerous as this hyen?
CnDS I went home from church with
a girl, and en the way back home the
father of the girl came out with a
ghost sheet over him, with phosphor
us eyes, and scared me. into a hen
cood. and as I was praying to die, a
negro with a dark lantern came to
steal the chickens, and when lie saw
me in the coop he gave me some
chickens he had stolen from another
coop, and he run one way and I run
the other, and I guess he went around
the world one way and I the other,
and wo met last night at the barbecue,
ft ire. and he started back around the
world the ether way when my fire
works went cff.
But I was not as scared in the hen
coop, with the ghost, and the fright
ened negrc. as I was up the tree, look
ing down the threats of the hyenas,
with the lions howling around sniffing
nt the remains of the barbecue, and a
few tigers waving their tails from
side to side, waiting for us to drop
on tne umns.
Pa went to sleep a-straddle of a
limb because he was tired, and the
cowboy went to sleep on another limb
because he was drunk, and j-our lit
tle Hennery was on watch, crying to
be put to bed.
When daylight came the animals
slung away into the jungle, and when
it got -light enough I could see black
faces peering through the bushes try
ing to find out if it was safe to re
turn, so I woke Pa and the cowboy,
and told Pa his subjects were coming
into camp to cut his liver out, and
toast it on a forked stick, and Pa
climbed down from the tree and
kicked the fire, and as the negroes be
gan to come nearer he said: "Wel
come to our beautiful city."
Pretty soon all of the tribe returned,,
but they did not kowtow to Pa like
they used to, until the old king
showed up.
He was so scared he was fairly pale,
and he had a grouch too, and Pa no
ticed it for he said to the cowboy:
"You go and fill that gas bag and get
ready to sail, because there is going
to be a mutiny, and we have got to
get out of this country pretty precious,
or they will cat us," and the cowboy
went to work to inflate the gas bag.
Pa stood around trying to look like
a saint.-and he pointed to the sun. just
rising over the hills, and got on his
Take That
from Your
Little Hen
knees to worship the sun, and mo
tioned for all the tribe to do likewise,
but they turned their backs on Pa,
and the sun. and surrounded the old
king whose place Pa had usurped, and
by the motions they made and the
few wcrds I could understand it was
evident they proposed to drive us out
of the tribe. The old king came to
Pa and said his tribe wanted to have
peace again, and wanted him to run
the shebang, and they wanted an old
fashioned cannibal feast, and that
they insisted on eating Pa and the
cowboy and myself, roasted. Pa said
all right, he was willing to be roast
ed in the evening but not in the morn
ing. He said white meat always tast
ed better in the evening, after a ride
up in the clouds, and he proposed to
the old king that we all three, with
the king,- take a nice ride in the sky
cart, take along all the gold we had,
visit an adjoining tribe, buy all their
wives, and herd them, and let the
cowboy drive them back to camp and
then they could roast us and have the
time of their lives.
This looked good to the old king,
and he went and dug up all the gold
and diamonds they had. and put them
In a bag. which was tied to the bam
boo frame of the airship, and after
breakfast we got ready to sail.
We fixed a sort of chair for the king
to ride in, tied with rawhide, to a cross
"Spry Old Man Banqueted 76 of Them,
Young and Old.
Portland, Ore. W. C. Brown,
known in the little town of Dallas,
Ore., as "Uncle Billy." entertained 76
widows at a banquet. The number in
cluded all the widows in his town and
the immediate vicinity. It was strict
'ly an invitation affair,-and if' any were
omitted it was by inadvertence.
vf J&atiA jnKtty 's&$
. .-....-. IWIWW'IIWIMMW
arn irnrr
stick right in front of where the cow
boy always sits, and I heard Pa whis
per to the cowboy that he would head
the ship direct to the coast, and when
we got away from the camp a few
miles. Pa would give the signal and
the cowboy was to cut the rawhide
rope and let the king take a fail out
of himself.
Pa steered the airship south, and
occasionally the negro king would yell
and point to the east, where the tribe
was located whose wives we had de
signs on, but Pa kept his direction,
and after running an hour or so we
came to a beautiful lake of blue wa
ter, and Pa told the cowboy to get
ready to throw off about 200 pounds
of dead weight. The cowboy said:
"Aye, aye, sir," and got his knife
ready. Pa let the airship down about
50 feet above the water of the lake so
the fall would not kill the negro king,
and when we got nearly across
the lake. Pa said: "Cut the rope," and
the cowboy reached over with his
knife and cut it, and down went Mr.
McGinty, hanging on to the rope, and
turning over in the air a dozen times,
and striking the surface of the lake
iWAsSR MWwaaWc ti ml
atraHav iKl -1 f If I f 1L i
JW&wM mvr
They Turned Their Backs On Pa and the Sun.
with a splash that shot the water up
nearly to the airship. "So long, you
Senegambian cannibal," said Pa, as
the king struck the water, and the
airship shot up about 50 feet higher.
"Give my love to 40 or 50 of your
wives," said the cowboy, as ha
sheathed his knife. "Take that from
your little Hennery." says I, as I lit a
giant firecracker and threw it down
near him, where it exploded like a
bomb. And then as we went along
through the air we watched him
loosen himself from the chair and
strike out for the shore, swearing in
negro dialect that he would eat us yet,
without salt, and then we got out of
sight of the lake, laughing at our es
cape and wondering where we would
We sailed along for a couple of
hours, and passed over villages of na
tives, but Pa said he would not take
chances on another nigger king, but
would run the ship toward the coast
as long as the gas held out, and on
we went until after mid-day, when the
gas bag began to flap as though the
gas was escaping, and Pa acted nearly
crazy, because we were over a dense
jungle, filled with wild animals, and
not a thing to eat.
After 2- o'clock p. m. we sighted a
clearing ahead, with nice modern
houses, and as we got nearer we could
see herds of Jersey cattle, and giraffes,
and horses and elephants, and the
queerest mixture of wild life and civ
ilization, and the nearer we got the
more it looked like a Yankee settle
ment, and when Pa saw some auto
mobiles and a tennis court, with men,
women and children playing tennis,
and riding around in gasoline and
steam autos, and a creamery and a
windmill and an ice house, he said
that was the place he was looking for,
and he pointed the airship for the
clearing, and toid the cowboy to get
the anchor ready.
The people on the plantation saw
the airship and quit playing tennis,
the autos pointed toward where we
were going to land, and when we
threw out the anchor and came down
to the ground and made a landing
right on the golf links near the tennis
court, we were soon surrounded by 20
or 30 men, women and children, and
Pa got out and took off his hat and
made a bow that would have captured
any people of any nationality.
Pa was going to speak to the people
in French or German, but a man in
riding breeches came up and in the
purest English, said: "1 beg pardon.
"Uncle Billy" is a widower and is
looking for a wife. He is 84 years old,
and celebrated the event with the
widows' banquet. The oldest of his
guests was 91 and the youngest 2. He
presided at the banquet and called
upon many of the guests for toasts.
Another feature of the celebration
was a shower of nickels he scattered
from the courthouse steps to the small
boys. He distributed $100. in this way.
I but is this Mr. Roosevelt?" and Pa'
said: "Not on your life, but just as
good a man, all right."
The man said he was expecting Mr.
Roosevelt, but not until after March
4, but' he didn't know but what he
had come a 'little ahead of schedule
time. Pa said he was a Roosevelt man
all right, though he had always been
a Democrat, and that he was an Amer
ican. "But what are you doing In Africa?"
said the man, who seemed to be the
leading citizen. "Oh," said Pa, as he
lighted a cigarette, "I have been taking
in a large part of Africa, and just
dropped down to see if you had any
news of the election in the United
The man said he was an American,
too, and lived in Michigan when at
home, but he came put here for his
wife's health, and opened up a little
ranch. He said Taft was elected all
right, and Pa said he thought it would
come out that way, and then the man
asked us into the house, and the oth
ers crowded around our airship, and
before long the cowboy was riding a
polo pony, and I was playing tennis
with some boys about as big as me,
and Pa was drinking high balls and
club soda, and, as the rum went down
and we sat around a regular dining ta
ble, eating off our regular dishes, with
knives and forks, and listening to peo
ple talk our language, and laugh right
out loud, the first experience of the
kind we had enjoyed in six months,
and we thought how only a few hours
before we were with a tribe of can
nibals, billed to be eaten at sundown,
we thought how small the world was,
and joined in the prayer offered by the
Better Distributed There Than in Any
Other Country.
"We never tire of telling the world
that we are a great financial democ
racy, possessing immense wealth,"
said Frederic F. Flahaut. a banker of
Paris, France, who is making a pleas
ure tour of this country:
"France's wealth belongs to a ma
jority, and not to a minority of her
people. The rich and the excessively
opulent, possessing millions, are hard
ly to be counted by units; they may
be designated by name. The large for
tunes are limited to a few people pos
sibly ten persons possess each some
thing like $20,000,000 and over; 100
may have between $2,000,000 and $10,
000,000; 600 may have between $1,000,
000 and $2,000,000; 4,000 have from
$400,000 to $1,000,000, and 13,000 have
from $200,000 to $400,000 each. Out of
10.000,000 voters we have from 7,000,
000 to 8.00P.000 who are capitalists
and owners of interest-bearing stock,
landed properties, holders of Parisian
bonds, credit foncier bonds, railroad
bonds, national bonds; members of co
operative bodies, people who put by
for the rainy day small sums in the
banks, that serve to assure life or in
sure against death. " It is not -the rich
who resort to the co-operative com
panies or to the savings banks. The
manner of distribution of property,
real and personal, constitutes the for
tune of France."
Youth and Manhood.
It is a fine thing in the springtide of
youth to poetize and theorize, and then
in the years of manhood to rule from
a higher throne and to crown thoughts
with deeds. It is like the sun, which
in the morning merely paints the
clouds and lights up the earth, but at
iuiuuay irucuues il wiiii neai, ana yet
continues to shine and to paint rain
bows on stormclouds. Jean Paul
He announced- that a similar banquet
will be an annual event the rest of his
life, providing he does not marry
Wants the Credit.
Little Willie Say, pa, what is a
Pa A hypocrite, my son. is a man
who publicly thanks the Lord for his
success, then gets mad every time any
body insinuates that he isn't mainly
responsible for it himself.' Chicago
Daily News.
Neglect Of tea Mens That a Scar
It Left Which Meaas Penaa-
neat Blemish or Worse.
MALL burns are too lightly regard
ed; though . seemingly light, if
they are not properly treated or
if the blood is in bad condition
they may fatally mar one's
A young girl dropped some hot
fudge on the forefinger of her right
hand. It did not pain very much,
and after the preliminary scream lit
tle attention was paid to it.
The blister that was raised was
allowed to break rather than be
opened carefully with an antiseptic
needle; poison got into it, the finger
became infected and eventually had to
be removed below the second joint.
Exclude air from any burn, however
slight. This can be done in several
ways. If no other remedy is at hand.1
common kitchen soap applied in a
thick paste helps remove pain.
Wrapping the burned place in a rag
wet in baking soda or keeping it moist
with witch hazel will quickly give
relief, even to rather severe burns. A
good proportion for the former is to
use a heaping tablespoonful of the
soda to a pint of water.
Do not neglect a burn as soon as
the first sting is passed. Should there
be the least sign of inflammation or
of pus accumulating call in a doctor
at once.
Satins are to retain their prestige
throughout the autumn and winter,
and manufacturers are launching sev
eral new varieties of this popular fab
ric. Satin directoire, marvelously soft
and supple, is one of the best of these
variations upon the satin theme, and
is particularly designed to meet the
demands of the clinging directoire
models. This modish costume has a
princess skirt of prune color cloth
with satin casaque coat drawn slightly
across front. As will be noticed, the
sleeves are cut in one with fronts and
backs. The braiding is done in .self
tone soutache and the buttons and
grelots are of black passementerie.
HERE are many ways in which
ffyKS . B
may be utilized for making memorandums on, and our sketch shows a
very handy little board, designed to answer this purpose. A stout piece
of cardboard forms the foundation, and this Is covered both back and
front with dark green art linen and edged with a silk cord. On the
left-hand side a pencil is attached by a fine silk cord, and there is a loop
of ribbon at the top, by which the holder may be hung up by the side of the
writing table or at some other suitable place. Through the upper part of the
board two small holes are made, and through the upper part of the half-sheets
of note paper two holes are pierced with a penknife, to correspond with the
holes on the board. Through the holes in the paper and through the holes in
the board, a fine silk cord can be passed and tied in a bow at the back of the
holder, thus keeping the paper on the board firmly in its place.
A glance at the sketches will explain all this, and the sheets are easily
torn off one by one after they have been used. A board of this kind is also
very useful for shaving papers, and can be hung up by the side of the dressing
table or over the post of the looking-glass.
Floral Ornamentation Is Used in the
Brightest Colors.
In floral garnitures the latest offer
ings of the season are little cowslips
In the natural tones of brilliant yellow,
as well as in fancy tints and black.
Tliair ifi nonnriflllr nttrflnt.VO Tt-Tion SIR
sociated wIth vIolets tne coiors afford-
'ing a delightful blend and imparting a
smart, cheerful expression to the en
tire hat.
A feature of note is the entire ab
sence of the bandeau this season. The,
hats, whether large or small, low or
high of brim, are posed deep over the
head of the wearer, with just the
slightest slantwise tilt, and in many
instances almost touch the eyebrows.
Large and small hydrangeas in the
daintiest and most delicate tones of
jioft mauvish pink and blue are in evi
dence; and so are iris-lilies (natural
nize and natural colors, mostly), daffo
dils and narcissus. Vogue.
Neck Wear and Gloves.
New jabots are made of point
d'esprit with a border of plain tulle.
Adeaaate Atteatita Necessary far
the, Weauai Wha WeaM Have
Her Haads BeaatifoL
RETTT nails are considered- a
great beauty. At the base thert
should be a white crescent, and
the nails should be as rosy as
the dawn. Beautiful nails are
compared by the poets to onyx. and.
in fact, in Greek onyx means nail. Ac
cording to the mythological 'legend:
"One day Love, finding Venus asleep,
cut her nails with the iron point of
his arrow and flew off. The clippings
fell on the sands of the shore, and as
nothing which comes from the body of
an immortal can perish, the Fates
carefully gathered them up and
changed them into the quasi-precious
stones which are called onyx."
The "art of manicuring" was origi
nated by Stitts, who was Louis Phil
ippe's pedicure. His descendants are
still famous in France, and the Sitts
method, which totally condemns the
use of 'steel either under or around
the nail, undoubtedly is the proper
and scientific one. Madame Sitts says:
"An orangewood stick with a little
French amadine will keep the nails
perfectly smooth and clean under
neath. Why roughen them with a
piece of sharp steel or thicken them
with an acid? And as for cutting and
lacerating the cuticle around the out
side of the nail, why, that was intend
ed by nature as a selvage (lisiere),
and if you cut it, you make it ragged
just as you would the selvage on a bit
of cloth. As well cut the border of
the eyelid or ear."
The nails should he cut in a curve
which follows the shape of the end of
the finger. The surface of the nails
should also be polished.
One hour a week spent in caring
for the nails is sufficient to keep them
in good order, if they are rubbed and
cleaned carefully each day.
Persian Effects.
Persian effects are still good, and
are conspicuous among the best mem
bers of trimming collections. One of
the most charming classes of trim
mings is the one in which the bead
work plays a large part. In these
trimmings fine silk braids of exquisite
weave furnish outlines and the beads
a solid filling for the centers of mo
tives and for borders. The loveliest
greens, blues, rose colors, etc., are
worked out in these braids and beads.
The solid beadwork of to-day is not
embroidered on a background, like In
dian work, but is made in woven and
strung patterns, the result of lighter
Fancy gilt and flowered ribbons are
used as daily bag accessories.
The small three-cornered conti
nental hat, or tricorne, revives among
the straw shapes for spring.
It is a pretty fashion to add a frill
of soft satin or very' closely-plaited
chiffon to the lower edge of fur muffs.
The milliners are introducing flow
ers made of chiffon and in a more
novel manner, though it is really quite
old, composed of beads strung on fine
our unused half sheets of i.ote paper
they are long and full. Other new ones
show a roll of white linen bordering
the point d'esprit. Jabots of malines
tulle bordered with a finger's depth of
green, blue or, indeed, any shade that
matches the toilet, are decidedly pret
ty and smart.
White gloves are quite set aside for
those of pale tints, if for toilets of
ceremony, butter color, strawberry,
pearl gray and silver gray with the
natural suede colors are the correct
tones. For morning they are of dark
er shades, of thick kid, and fasten
with one large button.
To Lengthen Skirts.
When making dresses from goods
that will shrink, or for growing girls,
run a tuck by hand or with a loose
tension on the machine, on the right
side of the goods very near the bot-
torn. Turn up the hem and tuck will
be on the wrong side. When ready
to lengthen take out the tuck and no
stitches will show. To make dress
shields for thin waists, cut white flan
nel the size desired, trim edges with
lace and use them same as rubbC"
shields. They will keep the waist drt- i
and they look nicely.
MS. '' ''.'Ll'?'.- jl i
National Association Warns Agalnct
Uce of Quack Remadies.
In view of the constant agitatloa
and misrepresentation with regard
to the treatment of consumption, the
National Association for the Study
and Prevetion of Tuberculosis has
issued a statement in which it states
that the only sure cure for this dis
ease is fresh air, rest, and whole
some cfood.
Hardly a week passes without some
quack "doctor" or "eminent special
ist," informing the public that he has
at last discovered the sure cure for
tuberculosis. After examining every
one of these so-called cures, several
hundred in number, the National
Association states that, one and all,
they are misrepresentations or fakes.
Two Classes of "Cures."
These so-called "cures" are divid
ed into two general classes. The first
class of "cures" includes the quack
remedies and nostrums with which,
the public is being constantly de
ceived. These range in kind from
"good whiskey" to pig's blood or
ultra-violet rays. Some few or them,
for instance, are cod-liver oil, lime
dust, malt, vegetable teas, and num
erous inhalations of supposed germ
icides, besides a large number of
well-known patent and proprietary
medicines and numerous disinfect
ants. None of these are cures for
consumption. They are rather for
the most part of a dangerous char
acter, and patients who take them
may be running a serious risk. Con
sumption is caused by a germ which
destroys portions of the lungs or
other affected tissues. No drugs,
medicines, inhaled gas, cr home-made
remedies can, by any means, kill the
germ or close up tne cavity in the
lungs, as is so often claimed for
these specifics. Neither is it possi
ble to inhale a sufficiently strong
germicide to kill the consumption
germ. Such an inhalation would kill
the patient before it would kill the
Another cla3s of "cures" for con
sumption, by which many people are'
deceived, includes the secret reme
dies advertised by unscrupulous
"doctors" and "professors" at the
heads of so-called "institutes." These
people advertise that they can euro
cousumption at home by means of
remedies which are secret and known
only to them, or sometimes they ad
vertise that they can cure consump
tion at the "institute" where he
claims he has a drug which will
surely cure consumption. A "doctor"
in Minnesota says he has a nevr
remedy vAhich he himself will ex
ploit for the benefit of humanity. A
Colorado specialist has advertised a
new method of curing the disease. A
St. Louis druigist claims to have
found how to "dynamite" tuberculo
sis germs. An "institute" in a west
ern state has been opened recently,
which pretends to cure consumption,
without resort to fresh air treat
ment, largely by means of massage,
osteopathic manipulations and some
secret methods. Again, the National
association asserts that the very
fact of secrecy in these cases tends
to discredit the so-called cure. No
responsible physician will find a cure
for disease and refuse to make it
known because of pecuniary motives.
Cure Possible.
These two classes of "cures" are
not "cures" at all. Consumption is a
curable disease, however, and in some
places more than 75 per cent of the
patients under treatment have been
restored to health. The essentials
for the cure of consumption are rest,
fresh air and wholesome food. A
large number of physicians have been
working for years to perfect a vac
cine, or anti-toxin for tuberculosis,
or to find some agent such as tuber
culin which will assist in the cure of
the disease. Thus far, the experi
ments have not furnished a product
which will either absolutely cure or
prevent consumption, or render the
patient immune against the disease.
Many of these serums have proved
effective in increasing the resistance
of the patient and thus helping in the
cure, but no scientist cf repute to
day claims to have discovered a tu
berculin which will produce a cure
without the combined aid of fresh
air, rest and wholesome food. For
information address Nebraska Asso
ciation for the Study and Preevntion
of Tuberculosis, 408 City Hall,
Admiral Sperry Will Send Battalions
to Washington for Inaugural.
Washington. Admiral Sperry sent
by wireless telegraph to the Navy de
partment the names of the battleships
of his fleet, which will remain at an
chor in Hampton Roads until after
March 1, in order to send battalions
from their crews to the Inaugural
parade in Washington. These vessels
are the Connecticut, Virginia, Louisi
ana, Wisconsin, Georgia, Illinois,
Kearsage and Kentucky, the last
three of which will be placed out of
commission on their arrival at their
home navy yards.
Revolting Crime in France.
Marseilles, France. The discovery
of a revolting crime, recalling in de
tail a case which occured in Paris In
107, lias caused a sensation here. The
body of an 8-year-old girl, torn by
twenty-eight knife wounds and further
mutilated by burns, has been found in
a populous quarter of the city. It was
learned that the child had been ill-1
treated before being killed. A man
who had been living with the girl's
mother, who is a widow, has been ar
rested, but his guilt is as yet un
known. Grand Dukp Vladmir Dead.
St. Petersburg. Grand Duke Vladi
mir, who had been slightly ill for
some time, died, suddenly here. One
of the attending physicians visited the
T..irl .inL'o onil cnnl-o mnst rprsssiir-
j - condition. Half an hour
later, while taking tea with the mem
bers of his household, he was seized
with asthmatic spasms and died al
most before a priest arrived. The
grand duchess was present at the
time and h!s sons, Grand Duke Bores
1 few minutes later.
Wonderful.jesults, eventually restor
bfcf fslf physical vigor, are obtaiaed
from the following: To one-half pint
good whiskey, add ono ounce syrup
sarsparill&.and one. ounce Torts ceav
poand, which can be procured from
any druggist. Take in teaspoonful doses
before each meal and before retiring.
apaf. aaaaaaSBaP
Musical Note. Signor Harmonetti is
at Present Engaged in Composing a
New Heir.
Starch, like everything else. Is be
ing constantly improved, the patent
starches put on the market 25 yearsN
go are very different and inferior to
those of the present day. In the lat
est discovery Defiance Starch all in
jurious chemicals are omitted, while
the addition of another ingredient, in
vented by us. gives to the Starch a
strength and smoothness never ap
proached by other brands.
It was in the hotel of a western min
ing town that the New England guest,
registering in the office, heard a suc
cession of youd yells.
"What in the world -is that a mur
der going on upstairs?" he demanded.
"No." said the clerk, as he slammed
the book and lounged toward the
stairs. "It is the spring bed up in No.
5. That tenderfoot up there don't get
the hang of it, and every few days he
gets one o' the spiral springs screwed
into him like a shirt stud. I guess I'll
have to go up, if there ain't anything
more I can do for you for a few min
utes." Youth's Companion.
Professor Munyon has just issued a
most beautiful, useful and complete Al
manac ; it contains not only all the scien
tific information concerning the moon's
phases, in all the latitudes, but has il
lustrated articles on how to read char
acter by phrenology, palmistry and
birth month. It also tells all about
card reading, birth stones and their
meaning, and gives the interpretation
of dreams. It teaches beauty culture,
manicuring, gives weights and meas
ures, and antidotes for poison. In fact,
it is a Magazine Almanac, that not
only gives valuable information, but
will afford much amusement for every'
member of the family, especially for
parties and evening entertainments.
Farmers and people In the rural dis
tricts will find this Almanac almost
It will be sent to anyone absolute!?
free on application to the MUNYON
Early Morning Poems.
"Why, Hiram," began Mrs. Dusen
bery. glancing up from her favorite
'newspaper at her husband on the op
posite side of the table, "did you ever
hear of such a thing? Here is a piece
about a man who writes four magazine
poems every morning before-breakTast
Must be quite a strain on him to do
all that writing on an empty stomach
Don't you think so, Hiram?"
"Well. I dunno about that." re
sponded Hiram dryly. "I reckon a man
wouldn't have such a terrible strain
on him writln' the sort of magazine
pomes we run across now'days with
his stomach an' head both empty!"
Poor Pat.
The surgeon of a large hospital was
paying a visit to the patients when he
come to a cot whereon lay an Irish
man who was not bearing his pain
very bravely, for he was groaning
"Oh, come, my poor fellow," remon
strated the surgeon, "try and beat
your pain like a man. It's no use
kicking against Fate."
"Shure, you're roight, sorr," groaned
the Irishman, who had been severely
kicked by a mule, "'specially whic
they're the fate of a mule!" Ex
change. A Republican Reliance.
Three-year-old Norris is fond of the
Twenty-third Psalm, sometimes repeat
ing it instead of his regular evening
prayer. Last autumn the name of the
successful presidential candidate was
often heard at the dinner table, and
Norris unconsciously fell into the hab
it of rendering one passage of the
Psalm in this reassuring fashion: "Thy
rod and thy Taft they comfort me."
Palatable, Economical, Nourishing.
A Nebr. woman has outlined the
prize food in a few words, and that
from personal experience. She writes:
"After our long experience with
Grape-Nuts. I cannpt say enough in its
favor. We have used this food almost
continually for seven years.
"We sometimes tried other adver
tised breakfast foods but we invariably
returned to Grape-Nuts as the most pal
atable, economical and nourishing
cf all.
"When I quit tea and coffee and be
gan to use Postum and Grape-Nuts I
was a nervous wreck. I was- so ir
ritable I could not sleep nights, had
no interest in life.
"After using Grape-Nuts a short time
I began to improve and all these ail
ments have disappeared and now T am
a well woman. My two children have
been almost raised on Grape-Nuts,
which they eat three times a day.
"They are pictures of health and
have never had the least symptom of
stomach trouble, even through the
most severe siege of whooping cough
they could retain Grape-Nuts when all
else failed.
"Grape-Nuts food has saved doctor
bills, and has been, therefore, a most
cct lomical food for us."
Name given by Postum Co., Battle
Creek, Mich. Read "The Road to Well
ville," in pkgs. "There's a Reason."
Erer read the above letter? A ae
oae appear treat time to time. They
are Kenulae, trae, aad (all mt Mama