The Columbus journal. (Columbus, Neb.) 1874-1911, January 15, 1908, Image 8

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Given Away Until Sat, Jan. 18th
. And ViraSl XZ"3
: -
5 Buy a Dress and a
We'll Give You One
5 Wool Dress . Goods
2 OlwaflwaiUMMSM.Jaa.IS 5
SrshptS have
In our dress goods
. a !faV- gfc-M-m-dV ii i in .tfavmBL
some pieces ox ntravy uiau?rituB, uwuiuiu cuiu umvjr wojkuii BiuuugB wiu uuu xui ua urwauos, oum ouiuo uj uwiosuuiu, wuie not in nrsb rauut. mj
trinsic value and will give splendid service. We have taken from the stocks all such goods. Everything not strictly nevr goes into this sale. In
of our Clean Sweep Sale we are going to give with each waist or dress pattern sold an equal number of yar& the sale
pnut? wiuiuuv vjLura uucurgt?. v
REM EM BE R--You may take your choice of any goods on sale
the price is the same as the goods you bought $
From now until Jan. 18.
three days of
Dress Goods for Noth
ing Until January 18
lHto I. S.
The Adamy school is still closed.
Herman Saardus is sojourning in
Kansas and Oklahoma.
Joseph Mudgett of Moncura, la., is
visiting his sister. Mis. IJ. R. Bieson.
Mrs. Oarl Both was visiting her sister,
Mia. J. W. Albers, from Saturday until
After an absence of fonr years, D. A.
Beeher and family are again receiving
mail on this route.
Miss Louise Seefield has ordered her
mail through the general delivery at the
Columbus post oSoe.
After a three weeks vacation, Rudolph
Koepke is again instructing the young
idea at the parochial academy.
Mr. and Mm. We. Brunkea, living
; of Platte Center, were visiting the
folka on the route last week.
Helen Kuper, who has been visiting
at Joe Kraase's, has returned to Grand
Island, where she is attending college.
The wedding of John P. Schroder and
Miss Clara Marks waa solemnized at St.
Joseph's church, at Platte Canter, Tues
day morning.
A very pleasant social time waa en joy
ed by the young folks at the home of
Mr. and Mrs.(Jobn Brunken, sr., on the
eveaiag of the 13th.
Fred Meyer is at the hospital receiving
treatment for a sprained hip, which he
received by falling from a spring wagon
last Tharsday morning.
Merv Kuntsleman, we understand, is
having a very severe attack of email
pox. Merv always did follow up the
aaying of Grannie in the Indian achool
aater, "Get a plenty while yoa're get-
The old maid's prognostication of the
young men on route one eut of Monroe
ia last week's write up by the carrier, is
the beat we have read in aooon's age.
We wonder why the old maid don't
peak for herself, John?
. W. F. Rhodehorst butchered foai hogs
last Moadav. That ought to keen him
baay until 1909. And J. BLRhodehorsi
also caught the idea and laid in a supply
ef pork chops. John Brcnkea also got
busy and dressed a porker or two.
O. W. Maeller, who is making bis
home with his wife's father, Gerhard
Krumlaad, has received a pension of 96
per month, also a back pension amount
hag to about $300 Mr. Mueller served
in the Spanish American war, and con
tracted rheumatism while in the senior.
Mr. aad Mm. J. O. Moachenross. who
received a letter from Henry Rhode
horst, father of Mrs Moseaenross, who
ia speeding the winter at San Diego,
Gal., statin that he is feeling toe at
present, aad if he keeps on feeling that
good he will not return until sometime
Oa and after January 1, 1906, C. B.
Spates wineaeosed to the coal business
ef has father. O. A. 8peice. AUaoooaato
ameteerewmgby C A. Speiee stay he
HHiiattheaaaes. aB.8naca.
stock, comprising over
am. ma ras n
Buy a Mar's Worth
Your Coupons
Ate Heart of Assaaaln.
A correspondent of the North China
Daily News describes what followed
the execution of an assassin: "When
the heart of Hsu HsI-lin was cut out
of his body and had been laid before
the remains of bis victim as a sacri
fice to the late governor's 'manes,
members of his bodyguard, to signify
their zeal and hatred of the assassin,
seized Hsu's still warm heart and
cutting It up Into mince meat boiled
It and served the grewsome dish
among themselves to be eaten. This
seems a poor way of revenging the
death of one patron, especially since
it was due to the very Ineptitude and
subsequent panic of this very brave
bodyguard that enabled Hsu HsI-lin
to fire so many shots, without any
kind of hindrance, at the late En
House Eleven Hundred Years Old.
St. Albans, possesses the' oldest in
habited house In the country. This
distinction is said to belong to the old
Round house, now the Fighting Cocks
Inn, which stands close to the River
Ver. It Is a curious structure ot
octagonal shape of early Saxon ori
gin, having been built as a boathouse
to the ancient monastery founded at
St Albans by King Offa about the
year 795, and is thus over 1.100 years
old. A subterranean passage, now
blocked up, runs from the basement
to the ruins of the monastery, a dis
tance of about 200 yards. There is a
shed at the back of the house, where
It Is said Oliver Cromwell stabled his
horse, himself once sleeping under its
roof during the civil war. Collecting
Hypnotic Sunstroke.
A German physician who had a pa
tient who could not afford to go to a
warm climate, thought he would ac
complish the same result by means of
hypnotism. The doctor chalked a pic
ture of the sun on the ceiling, and by
suggestion induced the patient to be
lieve It really was the sun aad that
it would cure him. But the patient
soon died. When the doctor's friends
guyed him about the novel treatment
he indignantly explained that the pa
tient was getting along nicely and
would have go well had he not unex
pectedly died of sunstroke.
Labor-laving Imaelitei
We ia some record had been m.
served of the time saved by changing
from the old-fashioned profound in
clination of the bead toward the earth
perhaps itself a labor-saving im
provement oa aa earlier ceremonial
of greeting ia which the forehead waa
brought, oriental fashion, ia actual
contact with the floor to the modern
Brisk nod. We wish there ware sta
tistics to show how much time man
kind has galaed hi cutting courtesy
own from paragraphs to grants. We
oHt.whetar aO the vaunted ceoaa-
JBJes of laaor-savlag machinery hare
oc laeor-eaviag
been getting bigger and better
five hundred distinct pieces of goods, there are necessarily a good many small lotsol goods that we
Many new pieces of dress goods added to
our sale. Hundreds of pieces of goods to
and Get a
asai gassrlsnss ef Veteran Tefle-
avapk Oseremr in en
"I worked for a southern railway
once," said the old railroad telegra
pher who gets about as close to the
truth each time he talks as the Arctic
explorers get to the north pole on
each subsequent trip. I don't know
whether it waa from sentiment or not
the banjo always being linked with
southern history, but anyway the
southern railway of which I am speak
ing was completely equipped with ban
jo signals for the operation of trains.
"For a spell the banjo signals
around Llnlithgo station got out of
whack and seemed to be going to the
eternal frankfurters. Just when some
fast special would be dashing through
Llnlithgo going 2:40 on a plank road
the peaky banjo signals would go ker
slap to danger, bringing the fast spe
cial up on all fours, as It were. Then
hades would be tapped around Llnlith
go station with an eight-inch posthole
auger while the engineer ventilated
his views.
"The company seat signal experts
and testers of all kinds to try out the
sulky signals to no avail. After this
sassiness of the signals had been go
ing on for a spell the night operator
on duty at Llnlithgo got subject to at
tacks of drowsiness.
"He just couldn't make his eyes
behave. Every night about 12 o'clock
he would drop off into the soundest
"The company couldn't stand for
any Little Bo-Peep in theirs. So the
boss asked me if I wouldn't go down
to Llnlithgo to try and straighten mat
tars' out.
"I never like to throw bouquets at
myself, but I will say that I had ao
marks agaiast my record. As far as
wakefulness was concerned I waa lit
tle Lord Fauatleroy on the job. Never
theless, when I got to doing the
aight work at Llnlithgo my reputatioa
far alertness or duty went by the
"Every midnight I would be -attacked
by drowsiness, and before long
I would be making a noise like Phila
delphia. Then the first thing you know
I'd be holding up all the flower of the
time card.
"One thing I did notice. Every
morning we would find our stock of
copper aad sines, used in the gravity
batteries, all nibbled up, as if they had
been attacked by a mouse with some
sort of smelter attachment Inside. The
plot certaialy was thickening.
"I got a good-sized mouse trap aad
set it near the storage-battery closet,
properly baited with cheese. This
drowstaess still same over me .every
midnight, aad the depredations oa the
electrical stores coatiaued unabated.
The company was getting pretty
at me. Iwas just about ready to
ap the whole tning aaa
rhea. I ran
tf best, the
Wei Give Ton
China or Semi Podine
night and was forced to halt my trap
'with a piece of peek-a-boo, opea-work
Swiss cheese.
"Along about 12:30 my usual drowsy
spell came on. I was just reciting
'Curfew Shall Not Ring To-Night,' In
my dreams, when I heard an awful
commotion out near my mouse trap.
"Struggling hard to overcome the I
aleepy feeling, which grew more over
powering as I drew nearer to the trap.
I ran out, and I can -tell you I waa the
most surprised man you ever saw to
find an electrical eel all twisted up in !
that piece of Swiss cheese. You see
the ordinary cheese never bothered
him at all, but he attempted to crawl ,
through the holes of the golf-course!
cheese in order to get at the electrical
stores and got all tangled up. . j
"The mystery of Llnlithgo station j
waa solved. Ton see a couple of elec-
j trie eels had wriggled their way from
the ditch along the railroad Into the
electric signal system, and after hav
ing once gorged themselves on the
current which is so essential to their
system they just couldn't leave it
"Then they got wise to the storage
closet up in -the station, and wriggled
up there every night to replenish the
dying electrical embers in their bodies
at the expense of the company. The
peculiar electrical currents they ex
uded from their bodies bad the same
effect as that new electrical anaes-
thetic the scientists are experimenting
with now. It put all the operators
who worked at Llnlithgo to sleep.
if that eel hadn't got tangled up
In 'the meshes of that Swiss cheese
the mystery never -would have been
solved. I guess that's about the most
peculiar and withal true electrical oc
currence on record."
"Say," put in the tall, cynical con
ductor, "there must be some of them
eels gettin' in their fell work on this
division, for I had to stop an' wake up
no less than six operators ia a dis
tance of 40 miles last night."
Straight Railroad Track.
In spite of the apparently mathe
matical straight lines which many of
the western railroads appear to follow
on the map. it has been stated that the
record In this respect will be beaten
by the, new national transcontinental
railroad, otherwise known as the
Grand Trunk Pacific, 70 miles of which
will be -constructed without a curve.
Five years ago, however, a length of
71 miles of perfectly straight railroad
track was constructed on the exten
sion of the Rhodesia railroads from
Bulawayo ia the direction of the Vic
toria falls. 8o far,, therefore, as tha
length of straight iine la concerned,
the record Is held by the portion of the
Rhodesia railroads above referral to.
A Strenuous Task.
"I doa't see why you should be ex
cused," the judge said to the witness.
"Ton look wen enough." "Bat jest
think of it, yer honor." said the wit
ness, "rve done stood oa this here
stand aa' told tha truth-far twe
aaa stretch."
bargains fi, ever been dven
Auk Dollar's Worth
What trie Wrizm Ftahtar SaM
and What tha Reporter
SaM Ha SaM -
"Things don't sound the same, some
how, in printed interviews. I can't
recognise my way of talking In any
of these Interviews with me that are
printed." Uncle Joe Cannon.
Here Is the wav the Interview with
Hotwallop the prize fighter looks when
it &tM tato typ tae New Tork
Weiit i feel rery certala that I
8DaU succeed la administering a quick
defeat to my antagonist to-morrow
night Understand. I have the high-
J est regard for aim as a man aad aai
a sportsman, out i really Deiieve tnat
I am the better man, and I shall make
every effort to convince my rrleads
of this.
"I am la as perfect condition aa a
man can attain who trains long aad
conscientiously, and I shall not have
the slightest difficulty in making the
"I am perfectly willing to grant that
Mr. 8wlftjoIt la aa excellent pugilist,
but I cannot conceal the fact that I be
lieve myself to be possessed of con
siderably more steam than he, aad I
feel, too, that the flght will not be
I protracted one. Ia truth I shall
be more than amazed if the coateat
endures longer than four rounds.
"I have developed several aew meth
ods of attack, all of which I shall
employ in case the necessity arises,
aad I think that any one of them
should enable me to earn the victory
from Mr. Swlftjolt, who has' always
exhibited a certain partiality toward
the old-fashioned methods of pugilism.
Toa may announce to my friends with
the greatest posUlveness, that"
The things which Hotwallop actu
ally said, though, out of the son'-son'-eastera
corner of his map were about
as follows:
"Swif jolt, hey? Say, pat away die
gabble' about slssagea put it away ia
a box, tsee? He couldn't nek a mat
ton stew wit' a set o' ninepins.
"It's one punch ia de lunch fr dat
gam aa' hell be a-Usteafa' V de bod
ies! He couldn't hit me little sla
ter wit a ckVes-pole, aa' wot chanet
has he got wit' me, hey wot chanet?
"Strip me off" dat wot chanet, hey?
He's a rummy f staa' ap aa' let me
poke at aim. I'm gola' f take a booh
into de ring f read w'lle I'm trlmmin'
him I like V keep me lid entertained
Wen rm up agla dis soft staff. x
"Wot, train fr dat aleee o tripe?
Tsay, all I need fr dat Mad la a hair
cat aa' ha'f a hour'a sleep. He's gota
t 'play fr my kitchen, is ha? Why.
tsay, hell never git near enough f
ma t traa ma a chew ' fine eat.
"flare. I'm gota' f stake da fat ants
eat dig up defr hate f sea aa mix a
sprint fr defr cash, aa' rm dere, be,
long enough f give ae
guya achanet f do sons
tm just be kJddla' aa' foeHn'
a, hat
fr me. aa' 1 wish I eeuld. get asnmvj
for your free pattern, providing
,? v
the free list
choose from.
Dinner Set
We Give Dress Goods
Away Until Jan. 18th
body t alt ap wit' me la de riag aa'
play pinocle Wile I'm puttln' eat
smudge away.
"He's gola f come troa wtt dem
pokes fr me pantry, hey? Tsay. w'ere
does Jie t'Ink I keeps me wlcka? Ia
"Wy, de las' time I fit dat mag I
could 'a' wound me watch aa' dea 'a
writ a letter home w'ile he waa t'lnkln'
over wedder he'd slip me a right
swing or a short-arm jolt, aa I come
aear yawala' me conk off a-waltla' fr
him f make up his mind. Tsay. I'd
rather staa' behla' two haaaered
akoita at a box oslea ana jt' wait fr
dat firkin o' grease f make ap hie
nut wot he's gola' f do la a mix.
"Have I got any new coives f
spring on aim? Wot fr? Hey? Wof
de nee o mania' after a street car
after yoa've caught it, hey? New
stuff fr dat piece o' scrapple?
"Wy, HI spank him on de teet' wit'
de back of me glove, aa' If dat doa't
git me ButhfB' I'll git a megaphone aa'
talk real hash f him from de odder
side o de stage. Him dere wit' de
punch, hey? Tsay, he couldn't hit a
Belgian hare wit' a shovel hard enough
f make de big-eared bug look up from
de cabbage leaves.
"Him dere wit' a fast new shift,
hey? He couldn't shift a hickory nut
from one jowl t de odder between now
aa' next Decoration day.
"Bid he stake me f some slams la
our las' fight? Not If I knowed it If
he did I waa too busy coaatta' de
house at de time.
"Two or free times I felt sometla'
like a cockroach crawtta over me
slats, aa' maybe dat was him alttla'
I doa't know. Might 'a sin, at
"I'd he willia' t sft down ia a rock
la' chair aa' let dat apollycod hit ma
AE have opened a new music
V V store in the Landon farni
ture store on Eleventh street and
will handle a complete line of nrst
class pianos. Our prices defy all
competition. Bemember we are per
manently located in Oolumbus.
in (Multibus.
wish to close, also
MtjMfc pOaVCaW ih-
the last three days
iota of the same
for the last
wit' a coal maul all de afternoon tf
he'd let me do my croehayla' aaT'reae!
de papers Wile he was doin' it Oat's
how much I'm 'fraid o' Ida peach,
"Would I advise me pals t sola defr
coin on me? Tell 'em V staa' a tap
sky. Tell 'em fr me t git down oa
me wit' wot dey kin snag on de rag
carpet .aa de oil stove, aa' anny price
dey gtt is like coanln graa'ma fr a
akkel aa' a horsecake."
He Faund Oat.
Tommy ran excitedly lata the roam.
eager to impart laformatioa. "Oh!
where did yoa get all that paint oa
your hands aad clothes?" exclaimed
hia mother. "Oh. that!" returned Tom
my, indifferently. "I wanted t see a?
tha people 'cross the street were tett
iag the truth.. They have a alga that
says 'Paint I knew right aloag that
it waa vanuaa, aaa i round it
VwflsVCan I lvaUPHlBrfl TaM
'As a school of character It la doubt
ful if any better could be devised thaa
the routine career of a medical stu
dent. It is not claimed that every
medical student at the end of his flve
. year curriculum will be found to have
become a saint But if he has set de
veloped manly qualities of self re
straint, courage, gentleness and for
bearance, t Is not far waat of oppor
faulty of practicing these virtues.
Ensugh anal ta Spare.
"Aad the same la to he" asked tha
suave atiaister aa he approached the
feat with the precteaa armful of fat
aad fieaacee. "Augustus Philip Ferdi
nand Codrlagtea Cheatei field Livings
ton Saoeka." "Dear ma!" Tarsia ta
the sexton: "A little more water. Mr.
Perkins, if ve nlease." Tit-Blai
1 .
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I t I I T