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About The Columbus journal. (Columbus, Neb.) 1874-1911 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 25, 1907)
-.-.tfrfgf -av- v s - .r-. - .v i. A ii32V.-Kj-''5;,T'5'J "rt iBaBWHIiOTPVW ?W?nlvL'" -f&mZ .. - i. i if wnnrr i-i " i - r ITT ' Stf- ' s4.2- s''vjr .-r"? siV'sv?steN f-"- v. i-i"-' ?&-' r ' -- ; vvrr "- - J" " - - - ' X 'J T , T - " e- - " T Til i m iiumim i"i wiiiffiaiiiMMMWwriWlii to i TWTWrTTllwiiHli m T "f a v?. '-.j;. J Pf'ffX -'Sf--1rM :" - i IBS ? I I & gsi i IS ?. ; I& m w hi H SB 33! l R5?i m ff ii 3 ' v BS :i S 4 r.m ColumbusJournal R. . vntOTHER, t4rtor. F. K. STROTHKR, COUDMBU4, lOBRASKi. J. Gee Word for Bank Clerks. One new thins proposed at the bankers' meetings had special refer ence to bank clerks. The bank clerks in the country will be pleased to know that the new thing may go through before the time Jot next convention, says Gilsoa WUlets in Leslie's, The new plan is to admit the bank clerks association as part of the bankers as sociation and give all the tellers and clerks a chance to attend the conven tions and have a voice in the busi ness. "And why not?" said a cashier of a big New York bank, while we sat with cashiers of other banks throughout the country. "The paying teller is, in fact, almost as important a man in any bank as the cashier. He can break a bank quicker than any other one man on the premises. By dint of faultless memory he holds his cage. In the five hours of banking, the paying teller cashes perhaps thou sands of checks. At a single glance he must know whether the signature on a check is genuine. The teller is also a careful student of the human face. If he does not know the faces of his customers as well as the faces of their checks he may some day crip ple, if not break, a bank. In the great banks in the large cities the paying tellers sometimes have as much .as five or six millions in their direct charge. That there are wondrously few betrayals of trust speaks volumes for the high average of honesty among the hundred thousand or more bank clerks of the country." Prize Money Won at Last. Xearly 50 years have elapsed since Vriah A. Boyden. a Boston engineer, deposited $1,000 with the trustees of the Franklin institute to be awarded as a prize for determining by experi ment whether all rays of light and other physical rays are transmitted with the same velocity. It was not until this summer that the prize was won. Mr. Boyden doubted the ac curacy of the experiments of Baron von Wrede in 1840, tending to shovf that light and radiant heat travel at different rates of speed, and he hoped . to have the matter established by a more careful series of tests. Dr. Paul R. Heyi of the Central high school of Philadelphia experimented on the lays of Algol, a variable star in the constel lation Perseus, and established to his own satisfaction and to the satisfac tion of a committee of expert phys icists that the visible and the ultra violet rays of the spectrum travel with the same degree of speed, and the prize has-been awarded to him. His paper on the subject was printed in the Journal of the Franklin insti tute. The accumulation of the fund for, nearly &0 years remains, and the judges in the contest have recom mended that the sum be set aside as a prize for similar successful experi ments regarding the speed of the infra-red rays. The German Kaiser Wilbelm is pro foundly interested in aerial naviga tion, and after watching the experi ments with military balloons re marked: "After what I -have seen to day, I am hopeful of the future of air navigation, and firmly believe in fu ture successes.' His majesty and others who are taking up the problem have come to the same conclusion as that formed 50 years ago by that pio neer in ballooning, John La Mountain, who repeatedly expressed the convic tion that "man would yet learn to fly." Many other wonderful things have been brought to pass, and with the steadily increasing knowledge of sci ence and natural laws possessed by the present generation the kaiser voices the opinion of a growing con . stituency. Returns from the target practice of the warships of the Atlantic fleet have been received and are regarded by the naval authorities as satisfactory and 'in some respects remarkable. But the army men, who have been stirred up by recent criticisms of naval officers regarding the looting by the seacoast artillery, have been keeping tabs and profess to have seen how the work of the navy can be improved in various respects. This is not at all alarming. On the contrary, it serves to show that both branches of national defense are on the alert and that each is try ing to outdo the other in efficiency. That sort of generous, friendly and ex pert rivalry promises the most advan tageous results to the country. While other people have been revil ing the automobile, a thrifty statisti cian of Connecticut has figured out that automobilists left more than $2. 000,000 in the state during the past summer. He thinks, therefore, that they should be encouraged rather than repelled. When Rndyard Kipling told the Ca nadians that England has 5.000.000 people to spare, did be refer to those who do not like Mr. Kipling's politics in poetry? In thinking curved thoughts into the female form divine it is not amiss to communicate them also to the accom plished and sympathetic dressmaker. Ohio's celebrated woman pitcher has this virtue, at least that she is aot likely to go on a bat dnd bawl out the umpire. y ttboIa Sam's lack tars are averse i. - to low-neck blouses, it won t do you any good to suggest openwork for a abstttnte. - The State Capital Matters sf General Interest : rtoM Nebraska's Stat sf Expenditure of Appropriations. C. C. Hnsted, recorder la the office of Governor Sheldon, has made a com pilation of the semi-annual reports of the state institutions covering a period from June 1 to November 30. This Is for one-third of the period for which the appropriations are madeand only In a very few instances have one third of the appropriations been ex pended, while in nearly every instance supplies, such as coal and clothing, have been bought in sufficient quan tities to last throughout the winter. The industrial school for boys at Kearney, with an average of 238 of ficers and inmates, spent $140.95 per capita for maintenance, the largest amount spent in any of the institu tions. The school for the blind at Ne braska City is second highest with a per capita of $137.91 the industrial home at Milford is third with a per capita cost of $128.59. This institu tion has 47 inmates and employes. The school for the blind has 84 pu pils and employes. The insane asy lum at Norfolk, with 316 inmates and employes, costs $119.70 per capita. The Home for the Friendless and Ortho pedic hospital at Lincoln, with 119 in mates and employes, cost $115.20 per capita. The Institute for the Feeble Minded at Beatrice, with 453 Inmates and employes, was maintained at a per capita of $137.91, the industrial in the list of institutions. The insane asylum at Hastings at the end of the six months' had $6,038.42 in cash on deposit with the state treasurer. The Soldiers' and Sailors' home at Grand Island had $2,712.05 and the peniten tiary $1,943.97 in the treasury. The cash was derived from the sale of pro ducts and live stock. Other institu tions' have cash in the treasury rang ing from $94 to $651. Express Company Wins First Round. The supreme court overruled the motion of the state to strike that por tion of the answer of the Adams Ex press comfpany in a suit brought by the state to enjoin the company from violating the Sibley act, which al leges that the Sibley act went into effect August 5. As the attorney gen eral filed .suit prior to August 5, the effect of this ruling of the court may throw out the state's suit as having been prematurely filed. The date when the law actually went into effect is still before the court and is a vital point in the case. If the court tlirows out the state's suit on the ground that It was filed prematurely the attorney general can begin a new action in the state court or he can wait until the federal court passes upon the matter, the validity of the law being an issue in a case now .pending in the federal court, filed by the express companies. The case in which the motion was overruled was remanded from the fed eral courts to the state court, where it was originally filed. The Sibley act reduces rates 25 per cent and has never been forced. Title to Soldiers' Home Good. The title of the state of Nebraska to a part of the site of the Soldiers' home at Grand Island, which has been In dispute for many years, was quieted in the state by the decision written by Commissioner Ames in the case of the State against Isaac R. Walter et al. The defendants filed a demurrer to the petition of the state, the de murrer was overruled and the parties electing not to plead further, judg ment is entered for the state as prayed. The parties who deeded the land to the 'state in consideration of the sum of $1 and the location of the Soldiers home at Grand Island. April 1, 1887, have recently claimed to have some right or interest in the premises ad Terse to the right of the state, which has put a cloud upon the state's title. The last legislature appropriated money for a new building at the home, the appropriation to be available only when the state had obtained quit claim deeds to the lands in question. The interested parties refused to sign quit claim deeds and Attorney General Thompson filed .a suit in the supreme court and has perfected the state's title without the quit claim deeds. Creamery Service. The state railway commission adopt ed a creamery service order. This will materially change the methods of handling cream now in vogue. The traffic to and from Omaha will be prac tically revolutionized. The service order given out demands the construe, tion of a warehouse in Omaha not less than twenty feet wide and having not less than 2,000 feet of floor space, all of which' is to be used for storing cream and cans, which at all times must be handled carefully. , Changes in Rates. The railway commission has grant ed permission to the Burlington to revise its passenger rates by reason of increase in its mileage caused by the new line from Milford. The in creased mileage will make as increase in the fare from various towns of from 6 to 22 cents to places east of Milford. The Burlington and the Union Pacific were given permission to reduce the rate on windmills and pumps from Fairbury to Fremont from 17 to 13 cents. The Commercial club at Fairbury wanted reduced rates. Treasurers Refuse Checks. It is .reported the railroads have had a hard time paying their taxes, inasmuch as in some instances the county treasurers have refused to take checks in payment for taxes. In Ham ilton county It is reported the Bur lington tendered the treasurer a check for that road's taxes and it ' was promptly turned down. The treas urer wanted the cash. So far the railroad company has not sent the cash and as a consequence the county is ont the money and the railroad company is being charged interest. Searle an Insurance Matters. "I approved the, plan and I tidal approve it," declared State Auditot Searle when questioned in regard to the rumor that he approved without the knowledge of Insurance Deputy Pierce a plan to change the Bankers Reserve Life, a mutual insurance com pany of Omaha, into a stock company. "This department cannot pass upon such a plan until after it is completed and put up to us. That will be done at the annual meeting, January 15." When asked If a majority of the stockholders can change a mutual company to a stock company, or if un animous consent was necessary, Mr. Searle stated that the statutes would be obeyed, and that that question should be asked of the attorney gen eral. The policyholders of the Bankers Re serve are bitterly opposing the scheme and declare that it is a plan of the officers to get entire control of the company by securing a majority of the stock. The company has $100,000, kip posedly for the protection of the policyholders, on deposit with the state. This will have to be palled down if the company is stocked. Net Weight Ruling Stands. Until a court order changes condi tions Nebraska food products put up in package form must be branded with net weight and measure of contents. An opinion was given by Attorney General W. T. Thompson to Governor Sheldon, embodying this view and it will be followed by the food commis sioner. It will make no change in his position, for his interpretation of the law is upheld in every respect by the legal department of the state. Gov ernor Sheldon asked the attorney general the meaning of the pure food law with respect to branding pack ages. In his letter the governor men tioned the belief of the executive de partment and asked if this was cor rect The attorney general says it is. and in a lenthy opinion, details his reasons. He says the interpretation is in line with the holdings of the court And while it is more strict than the federal pure food law, the state legislature evidently regarded the national law too lax and made the provisions purposely. The Standard's Assessment County Asessor Miller recently vis ited Omaha to get some information concerning the Standard Oil com pany's assessment in Omaha, to learn whether the franchise had been as sessed in that county, and to get ome idea of what sort of a return this com pany had made in that city. The cor poration claims that its main offices are at Omaha and that if it has to pay franchise tax or has to pay taxes on its book accounts it must be in the county where its principal office? are located. Mr. Miller found there that no book accounts had been listed and there was something like 200,000 gal lons of oil on hand that ought to have been listed for taxation also. The com pany was assessed for $100,000 in Omaha, after having turned in a sched ule showing $57,800. After the state board had got done with the assess ment it had grown from $100,000. placed by Assessor Reed, to $113,390. Work of Accountant. When the board of purchase and supplies meets in January it will have a state accountant to assist in buying goods and looking after the interests of the state. The law under which E. B. Fairfield was appointed provides that in addition to examining the vouchers, books and accounts of the various state officers, the univer sity and state institutions, he shall also assist the state board of purchase and supplies. The accountant is to work under the direction of the state auditor and make reports to both auditor and governor. Currency and Parcels Post. In order to get data to send to the Nebraska delegation in congress Secretary Whitten has been sending out, postal cards asking for the opin ion of Lincoln business men on the parcels post, the postal savings bank federal guarantee of deposits of na tional banks and asset currency. Hughes Cannot Come. Governor Hughes of New York, who was invited to be the principal speak er at the banquet of the Lincoln Young Men's Republican club Feb ruary 12, sent notice that he had previously accepted an invitation to speak on that date at Brooklyn, N. Y. Dr Giffen Appointed. Dr. R. E. Giffln has been appointed physician for the state penitentiary in place of Dr. E. L. Holyoke, whose term has expired. Dr. Giffen has for years been the physician in Governor Sheldon's family. The compensation is $100 a month. Governor Honors Requisition. Governor Sheldon honored the requisition of Governor Deneen of Illi nois for the return to Urbaua, 111., of Claude Freeman, now under arrest at Omaha. Freeman is accused of a statutory offense. Reese to Sit with Court. The supreme court has requested M. B. Reese, judge-elect, to sit with it January 7 and' 8 to hear arguments so that he will be able to pass on cases submitted at that time. Chief Justice Sedgwick retires from the bench January 9 and he is to be suc ceeded by Judge Reese. Judge Barne3 becomes chief justice, being the o'd est member in point of sefvice on the bench. He will preside over the court for the next two years. The next old est judge on length of service sus at the right of the ch!ef justice. Contest Before Irrigation Board. The question of the jurisdiction of the state board of irrigation to enter tain a contest filed by H. G. Stewart against the Tri-State Land company was taken under advisement after ar guments had been made to the board by W. A. Dilworth and F. A. Wright, attorneys for the land company, and R. M. Hobart for the tontestants. Briefs are to be filed by both sides. Mr. Stewart alleges that the Tri-State Land company abandoned some of its irrigation rights and he has applied for these abandoned rights. .ssrsrHaBVBav aMMMMMMMMMMMMMg tf'vBssBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBsS ft'BsssBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBSSB TLkBsTBSTBSTBSTBSTBSTBSTBSTBSTBSTBSTBSTBSTBSTBf sTBsTBsTbsTbsTbsTbsTbsTbsTbsTbsTbsTbsTbsTbsTbsT i3iIMiMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMBW ' J"eS3BsBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBbW QbPHbbbbbbLTjW vIIbbbbbbbbbbbw ' liBBBBBhA iIIIIHHHbbbLW QyHB&- VSHbIbbbbBIbIbH JEANIE a Political Clubs for American Women Byjeanie G Lincoln Weil-Known Washington Woman Advocates the Founding of a Political Society for Women "The League of the Golden Rod" Might Be Made Similar to "The Primrose Club" of Eng landWoman's Influence Should Purify the Ballot. . S (Copyright, by Joseph B. Bowles.) Copyright, 1906. by Joseph B. Bowles.l (Mrs. Jeanie Gould Lincoln, widow of the late eminent surgeon. Dr. X. S. Lin coln, is well known in literary circles in Washington, where she is also prominent in society. Her first book. "Marjorle's Quest," brought her Into public notice years ago. A later book. "Her Wash ington Season," was one of the first writ ten in the now popular diary style. Her more recent books. "A Genuine Girl" and "An Unwilling Maid," were received with favor by the public. Of her verses which have been set to music the best known is "Tender and True.") At the opening of the twentieth cen tury, realizing the wonderful strides that progress and enlightenment have made, perhaps there is none more gratifying than the increased and far reaching influence attained by women. Who, when the nineteenth century was yet in its infancy, would have been bold enough to predict to our grandmothers, whose stately heads still wore turbans and whose erect figures scorned even the support of a high-backed and most uncomfortable chair, that their descendants would don automobile caps, lounge even In a drawing room, become active pro moters of clubs and other female or ganizations, even cast ballot at the polls and be elected to public offices? No doubt the dear old dames would have shuddered at such pronounced advancement; but "extremes touch," and never more easily than in the de lightful being known as the up-to-date woman. What a boon to many have been the clubs, from the modest societies of the working girls in our great cities to the genealogical clubs the Daughters of the American Revolution, the Co lonial Dames and the Holland society! These wonderfully successful organi zations have conclusively proved that women are competent to direct public work, and to go hand in band with men in the honor roll of progress. But with this infinite number of clubs, historical and genealogical, there appears to be none combining the political and social in a manner which if properly inaugurated might show that the twentieth century is still a measure in advance of the nine teenth and include among the active workers those whom the world at large is somewhat prone to regard as the drones of the human beehive. There is a very large class of women in the United States who from environment, traditions and certain shrinking from the publicity attendant upon female suffrage are debarred from showing the interest they take in politics and from putting tbat inter est and energy into practical use. Taken in the proper form it would seem a possible task to develop that latent force and to make it of consid erable service to our Republican gov ernment by forming a woman's league, which might be called unless sotne bright woman suggest a better title the League of the Golden Rod. Twenty-five years since in England a few members of the conservative party, desiring to add to its strength and influence, proposed such a plan, 'and out of compliment and in memory of the late earl of Beaconsfield the present powerful and able Primrose league was named for its favorite flower. The first movers In the form ing of this political organization were Lord and Lady Randolph Churchill and Sir Henry Wolfe, ambassador to Madrid. Possibly the quick wit of the American woman was the germ which appealed to the enthusiasm of her British sisters. The dames of the Primrose league, which began In a small circle of London drawing rooms, now number their thousands and are found in "habitations" the Snglish synonym for our American chapters all over the "tight little island." As woman's influence is supposed to purify and ennoble the ballot, a 'great power for good government jnight be evolved from an organization whose center should be in our capital city, where, although we have no suffrage, its principal officers could administer with fearlessness and ability. Its ofcief should be the wife of the presi dent, ex officio, and of each succeed LINCOLN. ing republican president, with regents and vice-regents in Washington, and in the states where the league 'may be established. The ' yearly dues and membership fees would form a fund which could easily be added to by sub scriptions, when needed, and the only pledge required of the members of the league would be that by their personal exertion they procure, outside of their own family connection, one or two votes at most to be, cast at the gen eral elections for the Republican party. The question of a national flower has been a matter of discussion for a long time, but "the golden rod grows in every state of the Union, and as its color suggests "sound money" what better emblem could be found for the party which has taken that issue as a part of its political taltli? With the general election every four years, with no prime minister whose tenure ex tends indefinitely, we lose the pretty custom which obtains in England, where "Primrose day" is celebrated by wearing primroses and by decking Beaconsiield's grave with the bright eyed flower of spring. That, no doubt, would save the woman who may choose to inaugurate a league such as described the reproach of the Anglo phobists that we are becoming un American, and even that awful thing, imperial, by sharing the old honor with old England of maintaining a floral and political society. CUPID IN THE CORNER. One Instance in Which His Dart Failed in Its Purpose. When people first saw Nathaniel Seaforth they nearly always exclaim ed: "What a dear old gentleman!" When they knew him better, they generally added: "But a bit too fond of interfering." For Mr. Seaforth was the sort of man who prided himself on "taking an intelligent interest" in other folks' affairs. Now. of all things, he "loved" a love affair. He invariably scented it afar off, and did his best to help it along. One day he was comfortably esconced in an electric car when two young people entered a girl awd a man. There were only two vacant seats, and they, alas, were on oppo site sides of the car, and at different ends. The young people seated themselves in these, but immediately Mr. Sea forth, with a benign smile, rose cum brously, and gripping each successive strap in hazardous fashion, left his seat, which was next the young wom an, and accosted the astonished young man at the other end of the car. "Take my seat," he said, in the voice of one who would add, "and my blessing, too." The young, man obedi ently stumbled to the other end of the car. The eyes of the whole company were riveted in sympathetic interest on the blushing couple now reunited, and Mr. Seaforth chuckled into bis venerable beard as be said to his neighbor: "I don't like sweethearts to be sep arated. I was young once, myself." "Fares, please!" The conductor approached, the young woman dived into her purse and paid for herself, while the young man paid his nickel? Had they quarreled? The company were more interested than ever. The young man hastily the girl in stony silence. At last an in got out at the next corner, passing quisitive but kindly disposed old lady, who could no longer restrain her curi osity, turned to the girl: "Why don't you kiss and be friends, my dear?" "I've never seen the young man be fore," was the frigid reply: and, fol lowing the direction of her angry glance, the entire company gazed in silent condemnation at the would-be Cupid in the far corner. Chicago Tribune. Why He Was Happy. "Ever quarrel with you wife?" in quired Klacker, of an acquaintance. "No." "Have any trouble with your serv ants?" "No." "Children worry you?" "No." "Great Caesar, man! how's that?" "Ain't married: live by myself." Question for Question. "Why do women insist on going to matinees for the sake of crying?" he inquired, impatiently. "Haven't they enough trouble of their own?" "I don't know," replied she; "why do men Insist on getting into a poker game merely for the sake of experi encing a new kind of financial wor ry ?" Washington Star. GREAT CHCME. i. 11 jS ' f- ' ' ' t ' 'ryrT i'l'li I" l''l Jsw BstT BBSSB X ? "Are yon still troubled by your neighbor's chickensr' asked one man of another. "Not a bit, was the answer. "They are kept shut up now." "How did yoa manage It? "Why, every night. I put a lot of eggs in the grass very carefully, and every morning, when my neighbor was looking, I went ont and brought them in." THOUGHT CHILD WOULD DIE.. Whole Body Covered with Cuban Itch Cutkwra Remedies Cured at Cost ef eventy-Five Cents. - "My little boy, when only an infant of three months, caught the Cuban Itch. Sores broke out from his head to the bottom of his feet. He would Itch and claw himself and cry all the time. He could not sleep day'or night, and a light dress is all he could wear. I called one of our best doctors to treat him, but he seemed to get worse. He suffered so terribly that my hus band said he believed he would have to die. I had almost given up hope when a lady friend told me to- try the Cnticura Remedies. I used the Cuti cura Soap and applied the Cuticura Ointment and he at once fell into a sleep, and he slept with ease for the first time since two months. After three applications the sores began to dry up, and in just two weeks from the day I commenced to use the Cuticura Remedies my baby was entirely well. The treatment only cost 75c. and I would have gladly paid $100 if I could not have got it cheaper. I feel safe in saying that the Cuticura Remedies saved his life. He is now a boy of five years. Mrs. Zana Miller, Union City. R. F. D. No. 1, Branch Co., Mich., May 17, 1906." SORRY HE SPOKE. Hubby Just look at that idiot, Fitz jenes, what a charming, amiable wife he has seems to me all the biggest fools get hold of the prettiest women! Wifey You're right, nobody knows that better than I do. Knew Him. It was difficult to hire competent or even incompetent help in Eden Cen ter, and the commuters in that idyllic spot had learned resignation. "Harold." said Mrs. Crandall, "I haven't seen anything of that man who was to mow our lawn. Where do you suppose he is? There, I believe that's he now, over in Meade's orch ard." "Is he standing?" inquired Mr. Cran dall. "Yes." said his wife, "he's standing under one of the big trees looking toward our house." "That can't be the man." said Mr. Crandall. "He'd be sitting or lying down." Laundry work at home would be much more satisfactory if the right Starch were used. In order to get the desired stiffness, it is usually neces sary to use so much starch that tbe beauty and fineness of the fabric is hidden behind a paste of varying thickness, which not only destroys the appearance, but also affects the wear ing quality of the goods. This trou ble can be entirely overcome by using Defiance Starch, as it can be applied much more thinly because of its great er strength than other makes. In the spring the gardener's fancy turn3 to thoughts of green goods. Yoa alvvajs get full :iluc in Lewi Single Binder straight .h; cipir. Your dealer or Lewis' Factory. Peoria. III. His Satanic majesty is probably ashamed of some of his associates. Habitual CottsftpdlhW Mi rt 1 1 rttfpcrmancnuM toKicK enables oneiojfovm re&uft kliitc. Jnili ntLr AskfanrfKlM turc mo be groJuoty dispensed" w'A remel)cs,wneii Ycou-ireA areto assist nature ami net U ftuppUftt the net. ijteactvoRS,vKkf( must depend utti ftuitefy upen propel taeuTrishwtent, biiytke geftume California Fig Stkup Co. rcr IDLE MEDITATIONS. A woman may be afraid ef the cook, but a man Isn't unless she's his wife. Some people who say what they think aren't able to talk store than a inate. When yoa hear a married won.4n say that all men are alike it's a safe bet that she faced the parson with the wrong man. Philadelphia Tele graph. PUCKERINGS. The silver lining to most of our clouds is only plated. Nobody lives to eat. any more, and only a few obscure cranks eat to live. Most everybody eats to show off. It is true that public conscience has to be waked up pretty often, but what of that? Young and lusty and grow ing things are bound to be sleepy. It is. the wornout and senile that stay awake. Puck. In Ka "How did you make out on your run through Kansas?" queried the friend. "Pretty rough," replied the motor ist. "Cyclone came along and carried the machine Into the next county at the rate of sixty miles an honr." "Whew! Bet yon were shocked! "Well, I shonld eay so. While I wa picking myself oat of the mix up and counting the bruises a constable came along and arrested me for speeding. Chicago News. More Practical. "Did you hear that the professor had succeeded in squaring the circle?" "No, I didn't: but if he would figure a while longer and tell a man how to square his wife when he comes borne at 2 a. m. I think the would have a more appreciative audience." Nash ville American. Oh, the Flatterer! Weary Willie "Gee, yer a wonder! How did yer manage ter git a hand out from dat frobty-lcokin' woman?" Hungry Higgins "Dead easy. Wen she opened tie door, I sez! 'Good moruiu" miss. Is yer mudder home?' In Glowing Terms. She "Mr. Wimbleton spoke of jon in glowing terms last night." He "I am gratified to hear you say so. I have always regarded him as a fine judge of men." She "es. It was one of theY worst roasts I ever heard." "Lady," said the tattered tramp at the gate, "can't yer .spare me a dime on a very urgent collection?" "What do you call an urgent collection?" asked the busy housewife. "Why. yer see. I have just been fined $29.'40.00) for ridin' on an oil car. an' I've only got two days to get it together." "Of course," said the analytical questioner, "there is a great deal to be said on both sides of the question." "Yes," answered Senator Sorghum. "Too many of us are getting 'the ide:i . that all a public question is fit for now adays is to serve as the topic for a good talk." Omaha Directory PEOPLE know a thing or two these days ' about life insurance, and are;"'.' keeping" their money in the' ' West. Insure in the "":" Bankers Reserve Life Co. of OMAHA. NEBRASKA. B. H. KOBISON. President. Agents wanted on liberal term's. TELEGRAPHY Do 3ou want to learn it? We teach it most thorough, filling a number of positions every, week. Why put it off? Write -or come at once. We AbMlwttl" lltrMrttt FMiitaS. U. P Rail road wires and blanks used in school work, twin1 Cwirelal Crttog. mlU HA "SQUARE DEAL" ON ft IDES AID FURO irant M.1M Mnikmts aaat l.M Blak at ow. X". 1 Lrm Rat MMSr. Kit 7c !o. I Mink. Unj M.7&. Wrtta for prkw IM ob hides and fan which la bow raa. Taa mad full laforawtlan eaacifallr ftiraiafewL d. n. Mcdonald hide a fur go. Office ane werefrauee. S'3 So. lath Street Kcfraacaa:OaIa. Rational Bftnk OMAHA. Comawrctal Mgmelm Ntr. HTM Wwtte Tear LIVE STOCK Ship to ALEX 6. BUCHANAN A SON Livestock Commitaion, 134-1S Enhance Bide, 8o.Oniaba.Neb. 32 Team la Wtstta Electrical GNvaqr We earry a eoaiplot lln of t!ephonn and tl phoaecoaitrDCMoaiuatartal. Alsomotors.cnieratoni Bcandcarrat lamp: la fact. EVhRYTHl.NO ET.EO TRICAL. from door belle to pewer plant, compl.ts. Write for cctalorue. WESTERN ELECTRICAL COMPANY. 411-413 South Tenth Street. Omaha. Nebraska. CHICAGO PICTURE & FRAME CO. i Slanufactnrm and WholaTer. of Pictures. Frames, peruana, an noveiiies una umm Agent, wanted everywhere. CM S. I.tb it.,S aAlht, a8 Do You Drink Coffee Wi. put tbe rbrap. rnk. bitter na.otx! roSe. la yonr stomach "hen pur GERMAN-AMERICAN COFFEE mts no mora Iaatst oa La.laff tt- Your grocer Mil It or can gat It- ?K2 DENTIST STOar.1aOniaha.Nrtk. Room . Bulimit Dlork. K. K. corner ICth and IHul Ms. tiouri et tratb. MJe. r-M crown. M.W. Undue teeth. MJ; Amalgam niUac.-.; tl.erlHtlne.V': gold niltnva.tt and "T- aeatrB AYtUUtie IbABB. Bring tut advertisement with joit WpM m OMAN A Sttf at Ht Iler Grand Hotel . Grain Sticks and toads CWABACOMslcsO-.mS.T.UfWi .OaaaJu. nnHiMinilfiiliiif Morehead A Co. (iBcKClBt-inaait- Ohio: fast wire terrlcv. We elicit juex txnlaaae ky avail or wire. tv -v .-.."" e -. - i . t ::2p&i&&t& T i,rK.r5,i 5c -irjp irt3wv Jfcaf'?w MVf' - JRJ S JUSSi-C Ci? .isAnSsf, -i" ; --
