The Columbus journal. (Columbus, Neb.) 1874-1911, September 18, 1889, Image 4

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t NOTICE!;
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4
J is customary in many
instances for competitors,
whenever a new firm locates
in town to set all sorts ofru-
iiwrs afloat.
Gentlemen competitors,we
wish to state in this issue,
once for all, tJiat we are
coming Itere from Chicago,
ML, to stay, in spite of the
fogy ideas and rumors is
sued from such.
.Donotfear, we are not de
sirous of following in your
business paths of 100 to
200 per cent profit on all
goods sold.
Ml Orfcn
will receive prompt atten
tion. Write for samples,
BARBER & DAYKIN.
THE POETS ESTATE.
Be dweBs ta a mall, diagr garret,
Ia oae of the prosiest Books,
With oe'er a companion to share ft.
Save a cat, for bis muse, and his books,
A high though a bumble beginning
For one who aspires to cUmb,
A place well adapted to spaaing
For spiders or spiaaers of rhyme.
Tee storm beatee roof lets tbe rata in.
The wsBs aad the windows ara worse.
There are rents In his breeches and linen;
But seldom the rest la his puna
His visage to thai aa his pane U,
His adeaweu beats his abode,
For the poet to versed la reverses,
Aad pays his debts with wbst is ode.
Though dad lathe rags of a i
A hat that baa maajr a gap.
The poet la thought growtaag wtoer
Prefers to a crowa a fool's cap.
getWwM at aoeplc-me'a table,
Thoagh sometimes his living fa tart;
AH hto haaqoets are flctloa aad fable,
Aad a toast ta a poet's repast
He works at hto play for oar pleasure.
He turas attic salt for his meat;
Aad, thoagh holding the lines in a measure.
He always depends on his feet.
He's a dealer la fancies aad notions.
Tarns, prfhta, pictares, songs, rare and old.
Cone spirits, extracts aad lore potions.
For he's always a drug till he's sold.
The homeliest truths appear sweeter
Wbea through the bards lyre they pass;
Aad hasaor when drawn through hto meter
Might truly be called toughing gas.
la creed he's a sort of free thinker.
la politics quite democratic;
Aau though he's a temperate drinker,
Hesaa air that to truly dramatic.
For hto errors he makes ao repentance.
He's a license to sin, like a gin tax,
Aad when death comes at last with his seateace
He'll yield to the stern laws of em tax.
D. W. McOourt.
THE FATE OF AN USHER.
The acene wits a young man's boudoir,
if each an anomaly can exist; the time,
late in the evening, when confidences
find easiest expression; the people were
the boudoir's owner, in a neglige com
pounded of dress clothes and a smoking
jacket, and the friend of his bosom,
somewhat similarly attired, with the
comfortable abomination of a cigarette
between his fingers.
"Just let me read it to you agate,"
said lie of the smoking jacket, straight
ening himself in his chair and taking a
worn looking paper from the table.
"Something may suggest itself to you. I
want to have it all right, you know, so
that when the notice is mentioned I shall
be ready with a good suggestion. Now,
then, listen: Miller Waldron. On Wed
nesday, the 28th inst., at the Church of
the Seven Angels, by the Bight Eev. Ar
thur St. John Forbes, D.D., assisted by
the Eev. Francis Willard Mason, George
Northrup Miller and Adaline Bell, daugh
ter of the late Maj. Gen. Sylvester Wal
dron, United States army.' How is it?
Does it go?"
"Go? I should think so! All those
capitals will sparkle like diamonds in
the sun. But, Miller, I wish you would
count me out of the affair. How many
weddings do you suppose I have played
usher for this spring? Six no less."
"Well, make it seven. There's luck in
add numbers."
"There wouldn't be in this case. I
was just ready to swear off from all
social dissipations, and go into training
watil fall, for the sake of my health.
There's Greene, he's a good fellow; have
Miller shook his head. "I won't have
Greene nor anybody else," he said, clasp
tag his hands behind his head and throw
fag himself back in his chair. 'Til have
you. I'm sorry if you're feeble. I wish
you could be best man. There's plenty
to get and little to do in that situation:
but Ada's brother confound him! I
had to ask him."
"Of course. I don't grudge him the
koaor; but you know,Wednesday is drill
ht for me, and"
- T11 pay your fine."
"Hang the finer'
"With pleasure; but if you don't mind
the fine, I'm sure I don't see why you
saind cutting. They will work you hard
er than 1 shall. I won't oblige you to
carry a gun."
. "Thanks. Fm equal to the gun, I be
lieve." T11 tell you what it is, Brooks, you
have been in no end of a sulk since there
was a doubt about Miss Howard's being
said of honor. ,1 must 'say I think it s
shabby of you to desert me on that ac
count. Still, I will be magnanimous,
aad tell you the news, although it would
serve you right if I didn't. She has ac
cepted, after all; her father has consent
ed to her coming to town for theocca
sfea. Why he wanted to refuse stall I
cant issagine. But it is like him; every
body knows what he is."
Brooks laughed with a more interested
aaanaer than he had shown heretofore.
"I dost," he said; "what is he?"
"Why, haven't you met him?"
"Yes, but only once or twice, and then
not for more than a minute. He is a
"Oh, iron gray hair gives any man a
isringiiiihril look, and he is tall and
straight, which helps out the idea, but
he is a perfect tyrant. I have heard
that be is positively cruel to his daugh
sr; that be bought this place out of
town frposcly to keep her shut up, and
that he wont let a man look at her.
Vow there was Kadford. It seems that
be want out thereto offer Miss Howard
bat band and heart, and was fairly rush
sd eff the place by bis host"
"Sensible man. Who told of it Bad
ferdr "ldontknow; it was told. I admit
isuacially. Kadford is
SATUTRDAT
The Entire Building will be thrown open to the inspection of the public with
one of the largest and most complete assortments of
Ever shown by any one house in Nebraska. All our goods are new and of the latest styles and fashions, and our facilities for buying and being
members of a private syndicate of thirteen different large dry goods firms throughout this State and also connected with members of the eastern
syndicate, gives us an advantage to buy direct from the Mills, thereby saving the commission and jobbers' profits, and therefore we can safely say
that we shall discount all our competitors on prices in this
region. The public generally is invited to attend our grand
opening day and. be convinced of our statements. We
snail always quote me lowest marcel prices in uentrai
Nebraska, and whatever quotations we make in news
papers or otherwise, will always be -found in our estab
lishment, and to make this day memorable in the history
of the dry goods trade of Columbus, Nebr., special induce
ments and attractions will be offered in every department.
f mm W m
Our principal business
ions of 1860, of which our great-grandfathers taught us. What the people vvant and expect of merchants at this age and day is reliable merchan
dise at honest as well as lowest possible prices, and we shall, without rail, supply the wants and demands of the people in DRY GOODS, CARPETS,
UPHOLSTERY, MILLINERY and DRESS-MAKING.
Trade with us and save at least 20 to 25 per cent. All goods marked in plain figures and strictly one price to alL
not mucu ot a catch. He hasn't as much
strength of character as a little, wee
monkey; but I must say I think that he
might have been decilned with 'hanks.
suppose it sounds heartless, but pecu
liar advantages belong to a girl who
hasn't any father."
Brooks rose to his feet and dropped his
cigarette end into a receiver; then turn
ing an animated countenance toward
his host, he-grasped his hand and shook
it warmly. "I'll see you through, Mil
ler," he said, "if it takes the last prop of
my failing constitution."
After this the wedding preparations
went merrily on. One evening, how
ever, hardly a week before the great
day, the happy bridegroom sought out
his friend Brooks, with a wrinkle on his
brow and a troubled sympathy in his
manner. "It's all up, old man," he said,
with desperate frankness.
"Great heavens! what do you mean?"
exclaimed Brooks, aghast
Miller laughed a little. "Oh, it isn't
as bad as that," he said, "only Miss
Howard can't come; she has sprained
her ankle Lucky it was no worse. She
was tb rown from her horse. Her father
must be an idiot to let her ride horse
back. I suppose he wants to break her
neck."
Brooks laughed in spite of his disap
pointment "Oh, you're not yourself at
all. Miller," he said; "and small blame
to you. However, as you say, it is lucky
it is no worse."
"Yes; but what shall you do?"
"I? I sliall send her out some flowers,
and a note to say that I am sorry."
Miller looked relieved. "And you'll
be on liand yourself all the same?" he
said.
"Do you take me for a child?" an
swered Brooks, with some asperity. "Of
course I will."
He was as good as his word.
"You're a trump, Brooks," Miller said
to him, in a hasty aside at the reception.
"You have outdone yourself to-night"
"Don't say a word," returned Brooks,
in a low, delighted voice. "I have a
note from Miss Howard in my pocket,
asking me to come out to-morrow after
noon and tell her about it So I am
playing society reporter to-night, seeing
everything and everybody."
Miller laughed. "Alas! poor Rad
ford!" he raid, significantly.
On the following afternoon, therefore,
a pretty young lady with an interesting
pillowed foot was relating circumstan
tially tho story of her temporary in
validism and its cause to a brown mus
tached young man seated near her, who
showed an absorbing interest in the sub
ject. It was an attractive picture for con
templation on a warm day. A shady
veranda, with the gentle breeze coming
toward it over an odorous velvet lawn;
a email afternoon tea table set forth with
fruit and cooling beverages, and a young
and attractive pair of people luxuriously
disposed to enjoy their beautiful sur
roundings and each other's society.
It was a reality doubly fair in the eyes
of the young man, who was exchanging
for it the monotony of business routine
in the dusty city. Not that his lot was'
a hard one. An only son in business
with his prosperous father is in the ma
jority of cases rather overpaid than
overworked; still such a day, such a
situation and such a companion formed
an unusual combination. It was the
first tete-a-tete that he had ever enjoyed
with her wherein the certainty of an
interruption was not imminent But
now now no carriage waited at the
curb to bear her from him; no partner
all too prompt would come to claim his
waits. Brooks had known for many a
day that there was tapre happiness to be
found in the society of this young lady
than in that of any other, but the differ
ence had never shown so plainly as now.
Presently she raised a great bunch of
rare roses which lay on the couch beside
her and held them admiringly above her
eyes. These are the second you have
sent already," she said. "I understand
something from them."
"So much the better," he returned,
boldly. "I intended that you should."
8he glanced at him over her flowers
and then fastened her eyes upon them.
"I understand," she said, "that you are
very extravagant and very young."
"Young!" he echoed, paying no heed
to the less shocking adjective. "By that
you mean foolish, I suppose. However,
the flowers pleased you, didn't they?"
' "Yes, but they did not please papa."
Ah! here was mention of that bete
noire at last He had almost forgotten
its existence. "Your father is hard to
please, is he not?" he said, haltingly. "1
think I have heard that he was not al
ways quite amicably disposed toward
such as L,"
She covered her face completely with
the roses at this, but when she spoke he
could divine nothing from her manner.
"Papa likes to have his own way." she
said, half apologetically. Then seeming
to cast concealment to the winds, "He
hs a high temper," she confessed. "You
know some people have, but his is some
thing quite terrible, the storming, raving
kind; not toward me he is the dearest,
most devoted lather in the world; but
toward young men, especially young
men who send me flowers, he is quite
violent sometimes."
He nodded seriously, thinking of Rad
ford's fate; at least that fate should not
be his. "I shall meet Mr. Howard at
dinner, shall I not? he asked, wishing
the flowers in Jericho which so entirely
concealed her face. "I suppose that if a
man conducts himself like a gentleman
mhk presence he is treated like one."
"Oh. certainly that is,
nearly always. But he has
been asking
a eras many WststiQM about. you
ansa
DRY 800DS, CARPETS, UPHOLSTERY AND MILLINERY
v - .mm .-
1 A. 1 A.
methods are not the old
these came. He says that ne nas anown
your father all his life, and he always
admired him. Still, papa is hard to
please; although he likes your father he
may not like you. You are not your
father, you know."
"And you are not yours, thank heaven;
so let us dismiss the subject, and defer
the evil hour as long as possible. Will
you put down those roses, or shall I take
them?" 'Hestretched forth a hand toward
them, but she avoided it
"You have not told me a word about
the wedding," she said, hastily; "1 am
dying to hear about it Begin at once."
"Oh, certainly," he acquiesced, with
reckless gayety. "The spinster and the
bachelor will now discuss the wedding.
As you know, I was one of the ushers,
and if you have ever been glad that you
are a young lady, continue to rejoice, for
no one can turn you into an usher."
"Is it hard work?" she asked.
"Do not tell me that you have ever at
tended a wedding without seeing that
it must be drudgery. Imagine a fellow
shall I start there, or go back to the very
lieginning?"
"The beginning of your existence, do
you mean?" she naked, laughing.
"The beginning of the wedding," he
answered, with lofty majesty. "I am
too young to have a past"
"So you are. The wedding, then; and
do your very best this afternoon; be en
tertaining, for lying still for so long in
clines oae to blue dragons of the bluest
kind, and I want you to fight them off
for me."
"St George for England!" he cried,
laughing. "The fight begins! Imagine
a church, large, gray, a trifle damp per
haps, lights turned low, but over all a
gala air.. The chancel is decorated in its
white garments, and forty million roses
throw their beauty and fragrance over
all; together with potted things, of
course, palms and hydrangeas, tall lilies
and miles of smilax."
"Smilax in pots?"
"No, not in pots, but everywhere else.
Enormous-candelabra stand about, light
ed and festooned with greenery, and
high above everything is a great crescent
mado with twinkling lights like little
stars. Now! Enter eight conspirators!
I am one. The sexton is there to admit
us; the organist and a few favored
friends are already in the loft A mob
besieges every one of the doora. That is
the stuffing of the assembly, so to speak;
without it the nooks and crannies which
one could not fill with invited guests
would be vacant, and give the
church a cheerless look which the
lights and flowers could not soften.
Now we admit this stuffing, and it tears
its component parts to shreds trying for
places from which to see. Good! The
nooks and crannies are filled, and still
they come. They are vandals. They
stand up in the seats; they walk up each
other's skirts. These are ladies, you un
derstand; at least they were ladies until
the rumor of a wedding turned them
centuries back into barbarians."
"Splendid!" interrupted his audience,
laughing. "Why do you not report for
the papers?"
"Too young," he answered, dryly. "I
must have experience first"
"I am blighted by your sarcasm!" she
cried, continuing to laugh. "Please ex
cuse me for living, and go on with the
story."
"Listen, then, for the plot thickens.
Now arrive the least important of the
guests; how they can be so foolish as to
be on time I cannot imagine. The organ
ist begins to play, and the stuffing mash
es itself to paste. I give my stalwart arm
to forty stranded dames and damsels
no, not all at once one after another,
and they go at all sorts of gaits. By the
time I have escorted my share of the
witnesses, I could keep step with any
animal in a menagerie. There are tall
ones who stalk like the stately deer
only it is not the deer who does the stalk
ing; but never mind; there are short
ones, who chat amiably up at me, trying
to appear unconscious of the gaping
crowd, and these trot like little foxes;
then there are some unaccustomed, half
fledged ones who are frightened, and get
over the ground like a pair of dividers.
But I am up with them, neck and neck,
so to speak, as I turn them into their
places and stroll unconcernedly back for
another victim in my natural manly
gait And now they are all shown up
and a very comfortably gaudy gathering
they are with fans waving and jewels
scintillating. How am I getting along?"
"Not atall at present"
"But how was IT
"Grandly! We had just arrived at the
interesting part I was standing on tip
toe, ankle and all. to see the bride come
in."
He nodded. "Remain in that position,
if you please," he said. "The organist
is playing and leaving off at his pleasure,
and any ingredient of the stuffing would,
at this moment of excitement, be willing
to stand upon the forehead of its faint
ing neighbor to get a better view.
Presently we are summoned to the vesti
bule. The bride has arrived. Miss Wal
dron has eight bridesmaids in green,
and a special (your substitute) in pink,
who walks in beside her. They all liave
bouquets as large as hay stacks, and are
positively silent with fright Now
wraps off! Here we go! Doo! doo'
dy-dool That is the wedding march as
performed upon the organ; it must go
through that once, and then the door
are thrown back. All the people inih
church turn wrong side before, and
those at the sides sway forward, (riving
aa appearance of the walls falling in.
We leave four pews between each
two of us, aad six between the last
pair of bridesmaids and the bride
Ho oaa oomai attar the
GRAND
; 9KPTBMB
Mm a m
At A
fogy fash-
onae, wmenns fortunate, as irer aress i
no less than a mile long behind. W
reach tho chancel steps; the eight maids
in blue slide before us eight youths in
black. The bride and her special are
next the rail, as per rehearsal. Miller
and young Waldron are there ready to
receive them. Wur-r-r-r!' that is the
service."
"Don't be flippant." said the audience,
reprovingly.
"I give you my word that was all that
I heard of it Tho organ continues to
play softly: the bride gives her hay
htack to the special, and 'wur-r-r' on it
oes. There is some juggling with the
ring, and the bride's brother-in-law
nearly dies of stage fright as he gives
her away. Now they kuecL Well done!
I see the benediction. Up again! Good!
The organ roars its loudest, and thi;
bride faces about without turning her
train under side up, which is the master
stroke of the performance, and sails
down the aisle, Miller and all, while tho
crowd simply grinds itself to little bit,
and goes away piecemeal.
"I think you are very frivolous." sbo
commented, laughing.
- "And I think that you are very un
grateful. Have I not amused you and
fought your blues with might and main?"
"Yes, certainly: but" I
"Do not distress yourself over my fri-1
i-olity; it was a frivolous wedding. No !
single person lucre was aweu or even
serious not one. The bride was obliged
to count the pews and be careful that
hr-x train did not turn over. As for the
crowd, they could hear nothing, and de
voted themselves to trying to see, that
they miiit not have come entirely in
vain. We had two rehearsals, and I do
assure you that the service is the very
least part of. the whole."
"I should not wish any one to say that
of my wedding," she confessed, seri
ously. "Nor I, he assented, speaking as seri
ously, but with a daring light in bia eyes.
"I shall try to have a very different kind
if you approve."
Five minutes later the grating of car
riage wheels on the gravel drive at the
other side of the house made itself heard,
succeeded by hasty footsteps, which fol
lowed the sound of a calling voice.
"Papa, papa," cried the voice, "come
here! Come here as quick as you can.
Papa, this is Mr. Brooks, and be has
asked me to marry him, and he kissed
me, and won't say that he is sorry. Tell
him your opinion of 6uch conduct."
There was an instant of silence. A
stern, steady gaze on the part of the older
man; a firm front and as steady a gaze
on that of the younger. Then this ter
rible father, this tyrant with the violent
temper, turned quietly toward his child
and took her hand in his.
"Tell me what you think of the re
quest, little daughter," he said, bending
over her, "and I, will tell Mr. Brooks
what I think of the other."
"You behaved magnificently," she
said to her accepted sifitor. "If you had
seemed a bit afraid, I should have been
provoked with myself for caring for you.
You see, I have never had a man friend
who was not in terror if papa showed
his face. Just because papa is splendid
and silent, they fairly seem to grovel be
fore him. So.when I found that you did
not quake at the monstrous idea you had
formed of him, I was tempted to see if
you could be made to quake. It was a
test, but I was on your side all the time,
hoping that you would win."
"A kind of fairy tale ending," ho said,
laughing. "If the young man guesses
the riddle, he marries the princess; if
not, off with his head!"
"With the difference that this young
man would have married the princess in
the end whether he had guessed the
riddle or not Still, I like the fairy tale
ending. Let us hope for that by all
means. Do you know what it is? 'And
they all lived happily ever after.' "
The next morning, cf the young man
in the fairy tale was flying on the wings
of steam back to real life, Jie saj. wUh a
small noto book before him, m which he
had entered two words of an original
composition only two words, but of
such dazzling brilliancy as to be quite
incapacitating for further mental effort.
The words were, "Brooks Howard."
Anne Richardson Earle in Harper's
Bazar.
Droa-a-Xickel Marwlnes la Genaaay.
The drop-a-nickel-in-the-slot automa
ton has been brought to a high degree of
perfection in Germany. The weighing
machine was generally wtroduced there
before it was used in America. Similar
machines for advertising and distribut
ing candies and chocolate were common
in all German cities some four years
ago. In Berlin last fall automatons
which sold buttonhole bouquets for 10
pfennigs (2i cents) apiece were placed in
all the big hotels and beer gardens. The
newest and most curious German auto
maton sells cigars for 6 pfennigs (1T cents)
apiece. Its mechanism is operated, how
ever, by the nickel 10-pfennig piece;
with each 6-pfennig cigar, therefore, it
hands out to its patrons 4 copper pfen
nigs change. The opera glass automa
ton has not been introduced in Germany,
because there opera glasses are so cheap
that every one who can afford to goto
the theatre has a pair. The chewing
gum automaton is also unknown; Ger
mans don't chew gum. New York Sun.
Faaaias; the Haass of
Fond MotherWell, my pet, did the great
dramatic manager say you would qaickly be
comeastarii yoa ilKMud adopt tbaatagsas
a professioaf
Ambitious Daagater WeD, not exactly,
bat I thiakhaJateaos toaagags"' ioraaew
domestic drassa ofaosaakfad. Ha told me
to go aoaw sad lava to eook, Ktw York
Tribune.
OPENING
BR 9.1, AT lO
BARBER I DA7EIN. Mi July.
13ft St., Oil. Wmrstti Urttl
THE STUB TAILED COW.
Mr. HaaiHa Foraged far a Has
daat Uwsola ToW a Story.
Stories of President Lincoln's keen hu
mor are seemingly inexhaustible. One,
which I think has never appeared in
print, comes from a man who held a
prominent office under Lincoln, and who
knew the great statesman well. At an
official ball some thieves made off with
many of, tho hats and overcoats of the
guests, so that when the presidential
party was ready to take leave Vice Presi
dent Hamlin's head covering was not to
be found.
'Til tell you what, Hamlin," said a
friend; "early in the evening I saw a
man, possessed of keen foresight, hide
his lint upstairs. I am sure he would be
willing to donate it to the administration,,
and I will go and get it for you."
When the hat was produced it was dis
covered to be very much after the style
affected by Ilamlin, but it bore a badge
of mourning, which emblem the vice
president ripped off with his penknife.
The party stood chatting merrily as they
waited for the carriages to be driven up,
when a man stopped directly in front of
Mr. Hamlin and stood staring at the
"tile" with which liis head was covered.
"What are you looking at, sir?" asked
Hamlin sharply.
"Your hat," answered the man mild
ly. "If it had a weed on it I should say
it was mine.'
"Well, it hasn't got a weed on it, lias
it?" asked the vice president
"No, sir," said the hatless man, "it
hasn't."
"Then it isn't your hat, is it?" said the
proud possessor of it.
"No, I guess not," said the man as he
turned to walk away. When this little
scene was explained to President Lin
coln he laughed heartily and said:
"That reminds me, Hamlin, of a long
time ago when I was pioneering and sol
diering in Illinois and we put up a joke
on some officers of the United States
army. My party and I were a long way
off from the comforts of civilized life,
and our only neighbors were the garri
son of a United States fort. We did
pretty well for rations, had plenty of
salt meat and flour, but milk was not to
be had for love or money, and as we all
longed for the delicacy we thought it
pretty mean that the officers of the fort,
who had two covs a stubbed tailed one
and a black and white one offered us
no milk, though we threw out many and
strong hints that it would be acceptable.
At last, after much consultation, we de
cided to teach them a lesson and borrow
or steal one of those cows, just as you
choose to put it. But how it could be
done without the cow being at once iden
tified and recovered was the question.
At last we hit on a plan. One of our
party was dispatched a day's ride to the
nearest slaughter house, where he pro
cured a long red cow's tail to match the
color of the Btub tailed cow, after pos
sessing ourselves or which animal we
neatly tied our purchase to the poor stub,
and with appetites whetted by long ab
stinence we drank and relished the sweet
milk which 'our cow' gave. A few days
afterward we were honored by a call
from tho commander of the fort 'Say,
boys,' said he, 'wo have lost one of our
cows.' Of course we felt very sorry and
expressed our regret accordingly. 'But,'
continued the commander, 'I came over
to say that if that cow of yours had a
stub tail I should say it was ours.'
" 'But she hasn't a stub tail, has she?
asked we, sure of our point
" 'No,' said the officer, 'she certainly
has not a stub tail.'
" 'Well, she isn't your cow then,' and
our argument was unanswerable as was
Hamlin's." Washington Cor. New York
Tribune.
Earnlas Bis College Coarse.
Speaking of snobbishness, the Listener
h glad to have occasion to note a case of
old fasliioned manly absence of that
anpleasant reality. Spending a Sunday
recently with a friend in a very delight
ful summer resort not far away, when
a good many pleasant cottages have been,
built on a cliff commanding a fine view
of the summer sea, the Listener happen
ed to be sitting on the veranda with his
friend as a milkman's wagon drew up in
the street The milkman, a sturdy young
fellow, of pleasant face, dismounted,
rang a bell by way of warning to the
maids of the vicinity to get tbeirpitchers
ready, and then started around with his
cansand his pint measure. As he passed
around to the back door of the cottage,
the Listener's friend saluted him aa one
gentleman salutes another. And when
the milkman had gone the other said:
"That young man is a member of the
class of fM) at Harvard college."
"Indeed?"
"Yes. He is carrying himself through
entirely by bis own exertions, and be
takes this way of helping himself out 1
dare say he makes enough money selling
milk at a good figure to the people bars
in the summer time to pay the greater
part of his expenses for the remainder
of the year at Cambridge,"
"Does he water his milk?"
"Not perceptibly. It is very good milk,
and I have no doubt he is as honest as
the business allows."
There was a young man In the house
who belongs to the class below the milk
man's in college, and he testified, to the
excellent standing of the young man at
Harvard.
Such an incident is one of a good many
which go to prove that Harvard men ara
by no means all idle swells. Perhaps
there is not nearly so large a proportion
of students at Harvard who earn easy
in the summertime by table waiting at
the mountain and seaside resorts as at
Dartmouth .or Aashezst. but tbara
art Cwtf rial Bart, Cihrtw, Nkatka. j
J certainly a good many men mere who
earn every cent of their college expenses.
Boston-Transcript
A BUa; Steamer's Twhs
When Capt Watkina. of the City of
Paris, left Queenstown on the 25th of
last month and started oat a course fifty
nino miles shorter than his famous run
shorter because he ran northward where
the world grows smaller and came down
over the shoulder of "the great globe
we inherit," taking any possible chance
there might be of fogs and ice in cross
ingthe banks of Newfoundland at this
season the engine were put at full
i speed, and for something over four days
i they were driven at the average rate of
i ninety revolutions of the screws per
j minute. There was a variation from
! eighty-six to ninety-two revolutions.
When the furnaces were opened to be
cleaned the intensitv of the steam would
be diminished for a few minutes and the
speed of the screws reduced to eighty
six turns in the minute. It will be noted
that the average speed was three revo
lutions in two seconds, and the screws
are twenty feet in diameter. It is aston
ishing that this velocity can be main
tained day and night without a second's
waiting and avoid developing excessive
and crippling heat
The fact that thirty men are employed
to pour oil upon the bearings and all
pjirts where tlie friction is severs will
perhaps account in part for tlie phenom
ena, but certainly only the greatest per
fection of material, and tlie most deli
cate adaptation of one part to the other,
could provide for such a strain without
disaster. I doubt whether so startling a
test of integrity and absolute exactitude
in manufacture can be found in any
other machinery. During the late run
of the City of Paris the wind, was so
strong from the north one afternoon as
to give the ship a decided lift elevating
the larboard screw so that at each turn
the blades threw showers of spray with
a dazzling rush far behind the vessel.
There are four blades in the screw, re
volving three times in two seconds so
there were six white surges per second
dashed to the winds, and a fine reminder
of the snowy rapids of Niagara. M.
Halstead's "On the Bounding Billows."
A Sea Seat.
A monkey and a half grown kitten that
lived in the same house in New York
furnished much entertainment to the
family by their pranks, or rather by the
monkey's pranks, to which the kitten
submitted as if she liked them.
The monkey was chained so that pass
could easily keep out of his way if she
chose, but many times a day she strayed
carelessly within his reach. She might
be careless, but he was riot; he knew the
instant she crossed the line into his do
minion, and pounced on her, snatching
at a leg, an ear or the tail, always if pos
sible the latter, which ha sesiad to re
gard as a convenient handle. Then be
gan the frolics; he shook her till her teetb
chattered it is to be supposed: he hugged
her till she cried; he swung her by the
tail; climbed with her to the top of his
post, and held bar like1 a baby while he
dressed her far aftevm fashion poked
apart her toss, examined her ears, and
otherwise interested himself in her anat
omy. But his crowning delight was to sit on
her. Holding her. down to the ground
with one firm little hand, be deUbsrately
planted himself on her warm, soft, fui
covered ribs at if she had been a cushion.
Though he was not very big, being
about twice the sbwof the kitten, and
she had her slaws, the ase of which
would instantly release her, she often let
htm enjoy his comfortable seat till the
family interfersd. Youth's Companion.
A Tawa Aettially Palate
Advance agents,-who are the hustlers
who usually originata-the new -ideas la
advertismg, are seldom afraid of the
legal coasequences of their acta. They
often run Jong caances. jroc laataacs, a
little while ago a piece called "Paintia
TEr Bed" was produced fa Saa'fraa
cisco. The agent of the show could think
of nothing better to attract attention to
his performance than to paint every
lamp post utiie principal part of town
red and to bessaear the fountain that
Lotto donated to the city with the sanft
color.
Next morning vast indignation of the
whole populace, and a packed bouse in
the evening. Uafortuaately, the play
itself did not carry out the excellent in
tentions of the-advertising agent, who
was hauled up next morning, whan, to
the surprise of the judge in the case, no
statute could be found that would perssit
them to punish him. They even had to
pay the price of cleaning their own
lamps and their fountain. But they are
waiting, with an eagerness that ao
words can describe, for tha next adver
tising agent to paint something New
York Journal.
TttofsfTi
Tbe quauties or dinereas v
are worth knowing In thaaariag.
Ao-
cording to one authority, celery
upon the aetroas system, aad it is a
cure for rtieamaAissa and neuralgia. To
saatoes stimulate tbe liver, aad spinach
aad common dandelion, prepared ia the
same way, have a direct effect on dis
eases of tbe kidneys. Onions, garlic aad
olives promote digestion by stimulatiag
the circulatory system, with tha conse
quent increase of the saUva aad gastric
juice. Baw onions are ahorsgardsd as
a remedy for iliPflnssf, aad the
French ballsve that onion soap is mm
excaUsat toafc in cases of debility of
the dagestive organs. HaiTs Journal of
Bff
Strikes DM Not Worry Hiss.
Peter Conver, who used to run a paper
in Forest" county, Pa., never had but
one strike during his lifetime.
One day the devil was commissioned
to announco to Conver that the only
printer on tho paper, and the only one
in the county, was on strike for back
PJ-
"Very well," said Conver. "Just issue
a circular to our subscribers stating that,
on account of the death of our grand
mother, there will be no paper issued
from this office for six weeks.
Our sub
scribers are entitled to this rest, any
how, and we will save expenses for six
weeks. Seer
"After that what?" inquired tho deviL
"If tlie printer does not capitulate by I
that time, wo will issue another circular j
that our mother-in-law lias died, and :
the oflce will be draped in mourning
and business suspended for the usual
time. We can hold out as long as our
relations last"
Then Conver would buy enough whis
key to keep him drunk for two months
at least New York World.
Make aa Mistake.
By dispelling the symptoms so often
mistaken for Consumption. SANTA
.iBIE has brought gladness to many a
Household. By its prompt use for break
ing up the cold that too often develops
into that fatal disease, thousands can be
eared from an untimely grave. You make
no mistake by keeping a bottle of this
pleasant remedy in your house. CALI
FORNIA CAT-R-CURE is equally ef
fective in eradicating all traces of Nasal
Catarrh. Both of these wonderful Cali
fornia remedies are sold and warranted
by Dowty k Becher. $1.00 a package, 3
for $50.
Mystery
magnifies danger, aa a fog
the sun.
A Weaaa's Dtoceverr.
"another wonderful discovery bus
aeen made and that too by a woman in
this county. Disease fastened its clutch
es upon her and for seven years she
withstood its severest tests, but her
vital organs were undermined and death
seemed imminent For three mouths
she coughed incessantly and coul J not
sleep. Sbo bought of us a bottle of Dr.
King's Now Discovery for Consumption
and was so much relieved on ttsking tirt
dose that she slept all night end with
one bottle has been miraculously cured.
Her name ia Mrs. Luther Lutz." Thni
vita W. C. Hsmrick & Co, ot Shelby
N. C get a free trial bottle at David
Dowty's drug store.
The night shows stars and women in
a better light
The Verikt Paaalaea.
W. D. Suit, druggist, Bippus, Ind.,
testifies: fl can recommend Electric
Bitters as tha very best remedy. Every
bottle sold has given relief in every
case. One man took six bottles, and
was cured of Rheumatism of 10 years'
standing." Abraham Hare, druggist,
Belleville, Ohio, aiirms: "The best sell
ing medicine I have ever handled in my
90 years' experience, is Electric Bitters."
.Thousands of others have added their
testimony, so that tbe verdict is unani
mous that Electric Bitters do cure all
discs sen of the Liver, Kidneys or Blood.
Only a half dollar a bottle at David
Dowty's drug store.
Let them obey that know how to rule.
An Asssiste Care
The ORIGINAL ABIETINE OIN'a
MENT is only put up in large two-ounce
tin boxes, and is an abaolatreara for
old sores, buna, wounds, chapped hands
aad all kinds of skin eruptions. Will
positively cure all kinds of piles. Ask for
tbe ORIGINAL ABinNE OINTMENT
Sold by Dowty Becher at 25 cents per
box by mafl 90 cents. marly
Adversity's sweet milk philosophy.
Ceasanatiea Barely Care.
To tms Eoitob Please inform your
readers that I have a positive remedy
for the above named disease. By its
timely ase thousands of hopeless caeca
have been permanently cured. I shall
be glad to send two bottles of my reme
dy fkee to any of your readers who have
consumption if they will send me their
express and post once address. Respect
fully, T. A. Sloccm, M. G, 181 fearl
street. New York. 30y
A falling drop will at last carve a stone
Baeklea's Antra Sa've.
The best salve in the world for cuts,
bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rheum, fever
sores, tetter, chapped hands, chilblains,
corns, and all skin eruptions, and posi
tively cures piles, or no pay required.
It is garaateed to give perfect satisfac
tion, or money refunded. Price 25 cents
per box. For sale by David Dowty. 3
A book ofies paces.
Tbe best book for aa
advertiser to eoa
satt, be be experi
enced or otherwise.
eoattlas lists of newspepets and estimates
Man root nfnilTrrriTlnr Th"'1 "T " - -lass
to saead oae dollar. lnd la it tbe In-
i be requires, wane ntrmmwao wni
baadrsd taoasaau aonarsiaau
i sebease Is ladicstod which will
mwmrtr I IrilBSflBl III laaTlSISifr
,Ugtu3s2n.v
seat, aoat-nald. to say adSiess for IS ceats.
treble to GEO. P. BOWEXI. A
CO,
rorsrAFZK
ADVKSXH0U KlBAU.
a
as.j.aswz9sv
it
r
SPECIAL!
K
FIRST FLOOR:
SIUS, VELVETS,
Dress Goods!
TAKE LINENS, HKSTiCS,
CIS, BIDS.
Latin' & Sorts' fcfcrwur,
Gents Fmrmishimcs,
KIBBONS.
Ladies' Misses' and CMMrMfs
Cloaks and Shawls. '
SECOND FLOOR: '
CARPETS, UPHOLSTERY
MILLINERY
EST We show over '0 aew Fall aadWiater
stjlea ia ladies Miasos' ami Children's OUTER"
GARMENTS.
prOne or oBrgreei specialties ia oar DRESS
GOOD DEl'-UrTMEN-rT It will always be full
of BAKOA1.N3 sad complete is STYLES.
BARBER &DAYKIN:
SfeA0
-F.ronchiti5.s
anAB,SM"SESOAT'V
;SendJor Ctrcu.jr.ptrtoWi3hr9.g..
JAB1LTINE : MEDtaoOTJi. ul.
hrAttr UnltS j,r 9.2-
ua
THE 0 NLY-
.TtciTMwr!'
I
l-PTwy.
.n ... ....
CURE TOR
e.waJW.Cit.ciiAi
CATARRH
wncriNEHEnm
OROVILLECAL
SIITI ABIE anoCIT-R-CME
rOKHALKBY
DOWTY A BECHER.
Tnule aiilinl hj th II. T. Cutsx Dhi;u Co..
Lincoln. NU 7m.irS8-ly.
SCOTT'S
EMULSION
OFNKCODLWEIOIL .
jg HYPOPHOSPHITES
Almost m PaJatabtoM Milk.
8 tfissHttee aaaa at ems a tah
dlgesterf. asWI asalaslamal ay tHe
samstttva aSaaaaa. wfeass taa jMal
csauut fee Satersueat aasl sy Um
ktaatssai mt ta all wMm UM fcjrn
aau as Meat
leaaaTtasb) w a
Ferssas gan natty viae taUsg H,
SCOTTS EMULSION is acknowledgedby
Physicians to be tho Finest and Best prspa
return ia the world for the relief and ears of
consumption, caorui.A,
GENERAL DEBILITY, WASTING
DISEASES, EMACIATION,
COLDS and CHRONIC COUGHS.
The grtat remedy for (bnsvmptia, aad
Wtutinj in CkMrtn. Suld by all LrugtfsU.
CATARRH
Try the Cure
Ely's Cream Bal m
Clflsmaoa tholfaaalPiiBBasraa Al
lays Tjiflainmaticm. Heals the Sores:
Beatare3 tho Seneca of Taato, Smell
and. Hearing.
. A particle ieayaejlaiasaliasstinaa4
la aarceaUe. FrieafiOe. aC w-iaaahis as- ay
.ELYlOTnrasWsmaSbJiew Xotav
PRINCIPAL POINTS
EAST, WEST,
NORTH and SOUTH
AT-
U. P. Depot, Columbus.
13martf
PATENTS
Csveslssad Trade Harks obtained. :ir. 1 ail Fat
ent bosiasss ooadarfwl fur MODKlCAl'r: FKK3.
OUR OFF1CK IM OPPOSITE U. l-. I Vl'KNT.
OFFICE. We ban ao uubwuucicts .!! I-uxinees
direct, eases we esa transact ttnt buiuaeea ia
leMtiBMaadatLKjaCOST than thos isssota.
frosa Washiaafoa.
Head model, drawing, of photo, with deseria
tioa. We advise if palatable or sot,' bmo of
caarse. Oar fee sot doe till osteat is ttimtti.
A book. "How to Obtain Psteais." wjaainisr.
aaees to actual clients is joar state, eoaatyor
tows, seat free. Address
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