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The Death of Lore.
And is be dead at last? He lingered lonnr.
Despite the fever-fl'.s of doubt and pain;
It seemed ibat faith bad wov'n a web so
strong
'Twould keep him till bis pulse beat truo
again;
Center of so much youtb and hope and trust.
How could he crumble into common dust?
Cold blew the icy winds of circumstance;
Prudence and penury 6tood side by side,
Barbing: the arrow shot by crafty chance.
Snatching the balsam from tbe wounds of
pride;
Slander spiced well the cup false friendship
Ana so Love died. Where shall we make his
grave?
Scatter no roses on tbe bare, black earth,
Plant no white lilies: no blue violet bloom.
Weak in bis death as feeble in his birth.
Why should life strive to 6anctiry his tomb?
Even gentle memory Is by truth forbid
To honor aught that died as light Love did.
Let the rank grasses nourish fearlessly.
With no fond footsteps brushing them
away;
While the young life he troubled, strong nnd
free.
Turns to the promise of the world's new
day.
Leaving the dnrkening 6kies to close above
The unhallowed burrial-place of shallow
Love.
AH the Year Hound.
HOW CLEM COMM ITTED SUI
CIDE. "What's the matter? What's the
matter, my boy? Sit down. Sit down.
Sit down and quiet yourself and then
tell me what's the matter."
That's the way 1 talked to Clem
short for Clemence Alburtis as I took
him by the arm one day when he rushed
wikl eyed and thick speeched into my
office, and seated him on the lounge.
"Doc." he said in a helpless tone
my profession is that of a physician
"I'm crazy. I can't collect my thoughts,
and the pain in my head "drives me
mad."
"I know it," I said. "I've told you it
would be so many times. You have a
buzzing in the ears, black spectres float
ing before the eves, and "
"Yes! Yes! that's it. Nervous
twitches of the muscles of the face and
numbness of the limbs and "
"Depression of mind and melan
cholia," I went on.
"A disposition to suicide," he almost
shouted. "I feel it almost necessary to
commit suicide. Doc, what'll 1 do?
How'll I stop it? Eh? How'll i keep
from blowing, out my brains?"
"Nonsense!" I said, angrily. "Don't
talk to me about brains. If you go on
the way you're going now you won't
have anv brains to blow out in a few
days. You'll be in the lunatic asylum,
as brainless as a born idiot."
"I know it! I know it!" and Clem
wrung his hands wildly and endeavored
to spring from the lonuge, but I forced
him back into his seat.
"Aud so 1 am determined to put an
end to my life at ouce. God bles you!
Good-byf 1 can't endure this agony any
longer,." and once more he made an
effort to rise.
"Sit still!" I thundered out. now al
most angry myself, "or I'll send for the
police, and have 3-ou committed to the
Charities and Corrections, to be exam
ined as a lunatic. Now. do you really
want to be cured of this attack of tee
zeeweezees you've got?"
"Yes," he said, a little more calmly,
finding he had a superior power to con
tend with.
"Very well, then, give up all book
work. Lay aside pens, ink and paper,
go inlo the couutry, lish, walk into the
woods, feed the chickens, do anj'thing
but don't read anything but trash for
two months and, above all, don't think
of anything scientific until next winter
without my permission."
15ut what's to become of my paper
on The Origin of the Megatherium?'
I'm to read it before the Fci l-'o Fum
Society on the .th of next month, you
know," and it isn't half done yet"
"Confound your megatheriums!" I
exclaimed, angrily. "If you waut to
barter your life, or what you have left of
your senses, for a megatherium, why
take your megatheriums and do it, but
don't come bothering me about your
symptoms. 1 tell you that you must
have a complete mental and physical
diversion or you'll be a lunatic or a
dead man in a month."
"And drop my book on The Puerility
of Prehistoric Power?" 0id Clem,
mournfully.
"Drop every book, written and un
written, and write not a line but an oc
casional letter until I tell you that you
may."
Ihc poor fellow buried his face in his.
hands and sat the picture of despair, but
I know I was right Clem had gradu
ated from college with high honors and
gone to the bar with high hopes, when
suddenly his mind had, somehow, be
come diverted to science, in which, un
fortunately, he could afford to indulge
from the fact that he possessed a smail
but comfortable income, left him by his
grandmother, so that law could be
made only an ornamental part of his
life.
More than this, he was a remarkably
handsome fellow, and, outside of his
scientiGc studies, possessed more than
ordinary common sense. The fact was,
ho had overdone the matter, and he
was suffering, accordingly, from in
somnia and over brain work. Entire
and complete cessation from studv was
his only hope. Just as I had told him
this there came a gentle tap at niy door,
and to my summons of it "Come," it
opened and two ladies entered one.
Miss Martha Megrims, an old maid of
sixty-five, my patient with nothing at
all the matter with her but the want of
exercise and employment, and who
would not wait for me to call on her.
but hunted me dowu with her moans
and troubles daily. Her companion
was her niece Lillian, and "airy, fairy
Lillian" she was. A more beautiful lit
tle creature 1 never saw. and never ex
pect to sec again, and as good as she
was pretty.
Their coming just then embarrassed
me exceedingly. 1 could not dismiss
Miss Megrims." and I must bear with
her usual half hour of groans and
grunts, for which I was so well remun
erated, and. at the same time, I did not
dare to let Clem go. for 1 kuew he was
in a dangerous condition of mind, and
I was afraid that ho might carry out his
threat. Introducing him and bringing
him into our conference was out of the
question, and there was but one way for
it, which was to stuff him into my little
back room, from whence there was no
escape but by a skylight or the door
which led into" the office.
This I turned on him to do whon
I saw that he had risen from the
lounge, and was standing, as one en
tranced, gazing on Miss Lillian Brown
with a most unmistakable look of ad
miration, which I fancied was returned
shyly by the young lady.
""Clem, you'll oblige me if you'll step
into the next room for a few minutes," 1
said; "I'll soon be disengaged."
"Certainly, certainly," he said, mov
ing slowly across the office, bowing to
the two ladies as he went, but not shut
ting the door after him on his disap
pearance, so that he could hear all that
might be said. This was not much that
could entertain or instruct him, con
sisting only of the old woman's usual
recounting of the maladies which she
could not have had if she had been poor
and obliged to walk instead of ride, and
tbe occasional musical tones of Lillian,
answering my questions or encouraging
her aunt Over a quarter of an hour
was passed in titis way, which would
have been longer "had not Lillian, know
ing that I bad Clem in tbe other room
waiting for me, hurried Miss Megrims
away.
Who is that Doc?" said Clem, eae-
erly, as be rushed back into the room as
soon as the office door had closed on the
ladies. " I
That is the rich Miss Megrims," i
I said. "She's rot more monevthan
to spend it in. nnd so
"Oh, pshaw!" lie and
don't mean the old one."
lclii!:ui:lv. !
"Ah! that's her niece and stipposable
heiress. Miss Lilitan Brown!" I replied,
carelessly. "She'n rather pretty."
"Rather prctt!" he almost "shouted.
"By the great ichthyosaurus, sir. she's
lovely simply lovely, i never saw any-
thins: more beautiful in mv entire exist
ences'
"Gone!" I thought to mclf. "His
brain has given away." and" 1 took poor
Clem by the baud aud felt his pulse.
"Oh.'l'm all right. Doc," ho said,
laughing, aud thou resuming his seat
upon the lounge ami becoming quite
calm. "But really she is very hand
some, and I don't know that I've ever
seen any one that has made such an
impression on me. Can't you introduce
me. doctor?"
Oh. you're too much mixed up with
megatheriums and prehistoric power to
even talk sensibly to a lady, and Miss
Brown is a very sensible and practical
girl."
"Oh! bother the megatheriums and
prehistories. I'm not thinking of them
just now. I want an introduction to
Miss Brown," said Clem, earnestly.
"I'll give it to you to-morrow," I an
swered, "if you'll promise me to do just
what I tell you until then."
"Certainly, I will," he exclaimed
eagerly.
"Very well. I am to call on Miss
Megrims to-morrow at 3 p. m. Prom
ise me that you won't open a book,
touch pen, or think of megatheriums or
prehistories until then, aud that you
will go to the theatre with me to-night,
and I will take you with me to-morrow."
"Done!" he said, enthusiastically.
"Then we'll go aud take a walk in the
park." aud I shook hands with Clem on
the bargain, and we inarched away for
a smoke and a talk ali about Lilliau
Brown.
That night I tool: Clem to see an ex
ceedingly funny burlesque, nnd was
gratified at his appreciation of it in
early bursts of laughter, and the fol
lowing day he made his appearance at
the oflice faultlessly dressed, something
I had not known him to be since he em
braced science, aud looking so much
handsomer aud bettor than the day be
fore that it hardly seemed possible he
was the same man. Of course. I car
ried out my promise, aud of course
Miss Megrims looked Mirprised at my
briuging Ciem. but i did not care for
that, for at the same time I saw that
Miss Lillian was gratified.
For the lirM time within my memory
Miss Megrims seemed to forget her ail
ments, aud devoted herself to Ciem,
who had corraled Lillian on the oppo
site .side of the room ami appeared to be
making the beat use possible of his time,
which, I had warned him. could not be
more than fifteen minutes. She eyed him
with a look that amounted almost
to a glare, and poured in broadside after
broadside of questions about him that
would have taken the .tkill of a di
plomat to answer, though, of course, I
did it as favorably as I could for Clem,
but I came out of the encounter strongly
impressed with the idea that Miss Meg
rims did not want her niece to marry at
all, or have gentlemen friends, and that
she considered her too youus she was
twenty to think of such a thing at all.
When Clem got out'into the street ho
was in raptures. Liilian was an angel;
her beauty was almost beyond the earth,
and her voice music itself. He was in
love, aud Lillian had asked him to call
again which, by the way, I had no
ticed, was more than Miss Megrims did.
Well, time sped on, aud I saw plainly
that Clem had dropped everything but
Lillian. I saw him every day, and
heard all about it. He had called
again, and had been rebuffed by Miss
Mesrrims. He had called several" times
more, but Miss Megrims never left the
room. Clem did not intend to be re
buffed, but Miss Megrims finally de
nied him the house or an opportunity of
seeing Lillian. Then I stepped in and
carried a formal proposal to Miss Meg
rims, which I backed up with my best
efforts, but received a formal refusal.
Miss Megrims did not intend that her
niece should marry for some years to
come.
My reply to this selfishness was my
becoming letter bearer between the lov
ers, and a few days afterward they met
in Central Park, although it must have
been a hard job for Liilian to have got
ten the chance. From the meeting Clem
rushed into the office, exclaiming:
"It's all right. Doc. We're engaged.
Lillie's going to try and soften the old
hippoCTiff, and if she can't we'll get
I married anyhow and go abroad."
ieiii uau carrieu me war into Ainca,
and meant to stay there ali the time, he
said. He had forgotten all about me
gatheriums and prehistories, and had
no more symptoms and tendencies to
suicide. In fact, he was completely
cured, and, stranger still. Miss Megrims
had become as robust as a prize fighter,
and not a word ever came out or her
mouth about pains or aches, though she
would not give up daily calls, but al
ways filled them up with denunciations
of Clem and declarations that if Lillian
married him she should never touch a
cent of her money.
"Doctor," she said one day, "I never
knew a runaway marriage to turn out
well in mv life."
Oh! that's a mistake. Miss Meg
rims, i saia. "i nave known many.
Mr. Alburtis own parents were a runa
way match. She was a great belle, a
Miss Ellice Clark, and "
"What!" screamed Miss Megrims,
jumping to her feet "His mother my
Ellice. my dariiug Ellice! It can't be!
Why didn't you say so before. Doctor?
The dearest girl friend I ever had in my
life, and I've treated her sou so badly.
It's shameful in you. Doctor. Go and
bring the dear fellow here directly."
I did, and when he came she Script
urally fell upou his nock and wept, and
then they fell to talking about Clem's
mother until Clem cried in concert
Well, they did not have a runawav.
but did up the affair in style, and a"ll
went to Europe together, and the last
letter I have from Clem declares the
hipposriffto !w oue of the most charm
ing old maids the world ever pro
duced. i -s
A PEEK-HUNT IN ALASKA.
Trouble with Qnnrrelxome Dog Queer
Ciutom of the Natives.
The ice being in good, condition, with
dogs and sleds laden with cooking pots
and a few provisions, a tent and deor
8kiu bedding, a start was made early in
the morning. The thermometer mark
ed 15 degrees below zero and there was
an icy blast from the north, so that it
may be imagined that the weather was
somewhat cold. Smooth shoro ice was
found over which our sleds went rapid
ly, and at dusk (3 P. M.) the dogs
smelt the deer and tore frantically in
their harness to get at them.
And here en passant I may be permit
ted to dwell upon the annoyances and
vexatious that an Arctic traveler has to
undergo when using these dogs for sled
work. The most docile and mild-looking
auimal is probably the worst of the
team, quarrelsome, snarling, and fight
ing whenever a chauce presents itself,
lor an hour or so the dogs will lie
quietly, seemingly at peace with one an
other; then, as if by some 6udden in
spiration, one springs upon the other,
biting and tearing the legs. ears, and
those portions of the body unprotected
by hair, and a general melee ensues,
only ceasing when heavy blows from
pieces of wood or tent-poles strike some
tender part Then, too, at night, the
howling m chorus not a genuine howl,
but a species, of sharp, drawn-out wails
breaks upon the ear. to tbe imajrina
tion seeming like the wailing of horde
she's got tinii
plays sick."
of lost spirits lamenting their bitter lot
Still travel would be impossible during
the winter were it not for these dogs.
So far as exhibiting attachment or re
taining any especial liking for an in
dividual, these animals can not be said
to show the slightest trace. They simply
come to anyone who feeds them, acting
perfectly indiscriminately.
It was too late to start out hunting up
on our arrival, so after pitching the
tent making a lire from driftwood to
boil our tea over a process lengthened
by ice haviug to be melted to obtain
water, enjoying a smoke, and feeding
the dogs with whale meat, we turned in
to sleep. We were all up bright and
early at 10 a. m. After a breakfast of
tea and crackers, with the addition of
boiled beans heated in a frying-pan
with snow, a start for the deer was ef
fected. The dogs were left in camp, the
most unruly being tied to heavy logs. I
may here mention for the benefit of
future Arctic travelers that one of the
best kinds of food to take upon a sled
journey is a bag of boiled beans. Of
course they become frozen solid, but
when chopped off. heated with snow or
ice in a frying-pan, they furnish a meal
which for staying qualities I do not
think can be excelled. Either oil or
lard, not too salt can be added to the
beans when they are boiled, increasing
thereby their quality as heat-giving food.
After an hour's walking we came to
fresh deer tracks. Arriving at the top
of a small eminence we saw the herd
feeding, digging with their forefeet
through the suow in order to reach the
covered moss and lichens. There must
have been at least two hundred deer in
the herd, big bucks with wide-spread-iug
antlers, females and males of all
sizes, and here and there a yearling
fawn. Crawling over the snow, creep
ing along inch by inch until within
range, is the only manner to get a shot
at tbe animals. The country affords no
cover, and the slightest object bearing
the semblance of anything strange
seems to attract the attention of the
deer in a moment In order to guard
somewhat against this matter white
drilling overshirts are worn when out
hunting.
At a range of over two hundred yards
oue of tho natives fired, his bullet from
a Hotchkiss rifle striking the ueer.'a big
buck, over the forequatter, causing him
to rear aud jump iulo the air with a
bound aud then fall dead. The rest of
the herd, seeing one of their number
fall, scattered in a wide circle, sniffing
the air and peering around for the cause
of its sudden dismemberment. They,
however, resumed feeding in a short
time, until three shots, fired simultan
eously, laid two more of their number
low, while a fourth broke the leg of a
young fawn, who hobbled along after
its mother for some distance, until a
final .shot put an end to its troubles.
Four deer had fallen before our guns,
and the natives proceeded to remove
the skins from the head and feet, piling
snow over the carcasses to hide them
from the other deer, which otherwise
they think, would be scared away from
the country. It is the belief anlong
these natives that a deer shot one day
must not be brought into camp until tho
following morning. Our submission to
this custom cost us the carcass of one
animal, which was eaten by foxes dur
ing the night
Next morning a heavy snow-mist to
landward prevented our going deer
hunting. To seaward the sky was clear,
so that rather than stay in camp all day
some of us went seal-hunting, the one
woman of our partv. with her husband,
taking the sled an J dogs to bring in the
deer shot on the previous day. San
Francisco Chronicle.
STORY OF A SCAR.
"Do you ee that tall, handsome man
now talking to his highness?" inquired
au old diplomat of me at oue of the
suite bails given by the khedive of
Egypt in his fairy summer palace ol
Gezireb. on the banks of the Nile, says
a Cairo correspondent of the New York
Tribune.
"What," said 1; "do you mean Mus
tapha Pacha F., the cabinet minister?"
"Yes; and have you noticed that his
right hand is always gloved? Look at
it now. He is the only man in this
room wearing a glove on that hand,
which is contrary to all etiquette. If he
were to remove it you would perceive an
ugly kind of semicircular scar. In 1876
the English government, alarmed at the
khedive's terrible extravagance and re
peated appeals to the European money
markets, sent out to Egypt a special
mission to inquire into the state of tbe
finances of the country.
"In the short space of ten years over
8500.000.000 had been borrowed by the
Egyptian government and of this vast
sum only $200,000,000 had found its
way into the state treasury. What bad
become of the balance? Two people
alone could tell. One of those was the
khedive himself, and the other his min
ister of finance, Mustapha Pasha Sadyk,
the most powerful man in Egypt It is
impossible to conceive the enormous
wealth of the latter. Large tracts of
country belong to him and he had
the right of coining money in his own
name. His splendor and magnificence
were unequalled in tbe east His
harem of over three thousand women
occupied the three immense palaces in
which now ail the government offices
are located, and he bad a special body
guard in his seraglio of over four hun
dred superb amazons, who, on state
occasions, donned armor and helmets
of pure silver. The English envoys de
voted all their energies to win him over
from the khedive. It appears that they
were about to succeed.
"Late one night in Jane Mr. Julius
Blum, confidential secretary and facto
tum of the minister of finance, informed
the khedive that the minister had been
won over by tho English envoys, and iu
order to save his own position bad de
termined to turn king's evidenco aud to
reveal to them on the following Satur
day the whole of his highness' financial
transactions. The next day was Friday,
the Mohammeden sabbath. After per
forming his devotions at the mosque
tbe khedive proceeded in an open vic
toria to the palace of Mustapha Pasha
Sadyk aud invited that minister to ac
company him during his usual after
noon drive, and, pleasantly chatting
together, they drove to the palace of
Gezireh. On alighting at that door,
the khedive, turning to his minister,
invited him to supper on board the
vice-regal yacht, which lay moored in
midstream? The minister, accompanied
by the khedive's sons, embarked and
was rowed off to the vacht A merry
evening was spent on board, the whole j and seaside resorts, and the tables no
ship being illuminated, and occasional better than the run of $2 per day
snatches of music and laughter being houses. To help crush out tbe hack
wafted over to tho shore. At about 11 ; men and accommodate tho people the
o'clock the khedive and princess re- J State leased the privilege of a street-car
turned alone, leaving on board th- line from Prospect Park to the canta
minister with the two vice-regal chain- Jever bridge. It is a long ride for a
berlains, Mustapha Bey Y. and Sami nickel and at first thought one chuckles
Bey Baroudi. Shortly afterward the over the way the hackmen have been
sounds of a short scuffle on deck were euchred. On the sides of the car is tbe
heard by tiie people on shore, and then ' sign, "To all points of interest" As a
all was quiet and the lights were extm-
suisued on board. Soon after midnight
the yacht cast loose from her moorings
and noiselessly glided up tbe stream to
ward the first cataract Nothing more
was ever seen in this world of Mustapha
. Pasha Sadyk.
I "On tbe next day a decree was issued
I stating that the khedive bad banished
his minister of finance to Upper fcgypt
for having dared to oppress Lis much
beloved subjects.' etc., etc. Four days
later tbe yacht retained to her moorings
off the Gezireh palace, and when the
two cnamoeriains anove reierrea ro re- ,
samed their service it was noticed that
Sami Bey wore a handkerchief round .
his throat as if to bide some wound on
his neck, and that Mustapha BeyF. had
his right hand in a sUng
IIJ NOT SUPPRESS IT.
Why Lincoln' War MlnUter Did
Suppress a Paper Daring the
KbeliioD.
Not
Mr. William M. Singerly, editor and
proprietor of the Philadelphia Record,
who divides with Mr. George W. Childs,
editor and proprietor of the Philadelphia
Ledger, the respect and regard of the
city of Philadelphia, will soon be the
owner of the fastest steel steam yacht
in the United States. It is now being
completed at Chester by the best build
ers there. Mr. Childs has never owned
a yacht But then Mr. Singerly owns
several other things that Mr. Childs has
never had. Both are alike, however, in
that each controls a great independent
newspaper, that neither will accept
office aud that each has had a station
named after him on the new Baltimore
and Ohio line into Philadelphia. Their
paper mills are near these stations.
The Ledger does not use as much paper
nowadays as the Record. The latter
has quietly won a circulation of upwards
of 110.000 daily, except Saturday, when
120,000 copies of the eight-page '"double
sheet" are sold for one cent a piece.
This circulation is the growth of only
seven years, and that in conservative
Philadelphia, too.
Speaking of the Ledger reminds me
of a story General Simon Cameron used
to ten. "When I
was in Washington
during tbe war." he said. "Mr. Georsre
W. Childs. of Philadelphia, called on
me one day and asked me whether I
, -
had any objection to bis purchasing tho
Philadelphia Ledger. I said that lhad
none in the world, and then asked him
why he came to me with such a ques
tion. He said that Mr. Swain, the own
er of the Ledger, had made my consent
an absolute 'condition of the sale of tbe
Ledger, which Mr. Childs was then try
ing to negotiate. I said I did not
understand that at all; that I had no
interest at any time in the Ledger, or so
far as I knew in any other enterprise of
Mr. Swain. In fact I hardly knew Mr.
Swain except by reputation. Howover,
1 repeated I had ami could have no ob
jection whatever to Mr. Swain's doing
anything that he pleased with his own
property. I offered to put this statement
in writing, seoing that Childs was not
quite satisfied. No, he said, Mr. Swain
wanted tbe assurance from my owu
lips, and he would like to know whother
1 would soon bo iu Philadelphia. It
happened that 1 was to be in Puiladel-
Shia shortly and I said so. With that
Ir. Childs departed. When I went to
Philadelphia Mr. Swain called on mo
aud asked me whether I had any ob
jection to his selling the Ledger to Mr.
Childs. None iu the world" I said to
him as I had to Mr. Childs himself;
'.but why do you ask my consent?"
" Do" you remember,' said he, 'find
ing a communication on your desk one
morning, when you was secretary of
war, from Secretary Seward directing
the suppression of the Baltimore Sun
for alleged treasonable utterances?'
'Yes,' I said; 'but how did you know
about that? It was confidential.' 'Never
mind.' he said, 'I did know about it,
and 1 did know that it was never exe
cuted because you laid the matter before
President Lincoln and brought him to
the conclusion to which you had your
self come, that it was unjust Well, 1
was a partowuerin tho Baltimore Sun.
If you had suppressed the Sun just at
that time it would have ruined me. 1
made up my mind that no one should
ever get hold of the Ledger who would
be likely to use it to injure you. And
that is why 1 wanted to kuow whether
you had any objection to Mr. Childs;
because if you have, he can't have the
Ledger.' I told him I had no objection
iu the world to Mr. Child, and shortly
afterward the sale was consummated. I
remember as though it had been yester
day the morning when I found on my
desk at tiie war department the letter
from Seward directing the suppression
of the Baltimore Sun for publishing
editorials alleged to be seditiou3 in
tone. 1 sat down aud actually wrote an
order to the general iu command at
Baltimore, directing him to carry out
the order of the secretary of state. Then
I stopped to think. I r-'membered that
I uau ouce owned a new.-. paper, a little
one, to bo sure, but it was all I had,
and I said to myself, 'What would have
become of you if your newspaper had
been suppressed upon the arbitrary or
der of some cabinet officer based on his
own construction of your editorial utter
ances?' As I sat thiukintr I tore up the
order I had written. Then I went
over to the White House, aud showing
Seward's letter to tho president told
him that I thought the course it sug
gested would be arbitrary and unjust.
'Pay no attention to it,' he said, and I
went back to the war department aud
pigeon-holed it in my own desk.",
Washngton Capital.
THE AMERICAN SWINDLE.
What Still Happens to I'enpte W!u Visit
Niagara Kail.
If you will talk with 100 people who
have visited Niagara Falls you will
find ninety of them still mad at the
thought of how they were iu some man
ner swindled, and that the other ten
remember the place with disgust be
cause of tho extortions practiced on
every hand. The swindler and robber
arrived at tbe Falls about the time the
first hotel was erected, and he has con
tinued to llourish aud grow fat until the
present hour. There was a timo when
he was in the minority; he now runs
things to suit himself.
When the great State of New York
appropriated $1,500,000 to buy the
swindlers out aud make the Falls free
to tbe people the hearts of tbe masses !
were rejoiced. The purchase took in
Goat Island, Prospect Park, and a strip
i7i. - k Vu T,? p.r-
down the river above the falls. This
i v a -At i
rn& Sr.iii6 '"! i
vvww ww r 'wa awwirwa ajtw tt twtr
reduced to 15 cents, and tbo trip down
the inclined railway to 10 cents.
TIlPO thA C.V rVktinnil nf Kianrar
nnssed sneli orilinanj no wr -cWr- '
ed to either reform the htebwav robbers '
who drive the hacks or force" them to I
leave the place, and the ueonla ware
called upou to visit free Niagara and
enjoy themselves. I dropped oft there
fdr a couple of days last month, beine
very enthusiastic over the reform, and
ready to credit the Empire State with
any amount of public philanthropy.
To begin with, I will leave it to any
fair-minded man if there is a hotel at
the place which isn't a swindle when it
charges $4 per day? The best rooms
are second-class to those of mountain
matter of fact, it hits but two
two Doints.
un me uasuooarus is painted the siro:
To the whirlpool." When I saw it I
reasoned to myself that the car ran from
the park to the whirlpool. Anybody
else would reason the same way. In
company with a couple of young boys I
boarued tbe car one morning to go
down to tbe whirlpool. No point of in
terest was touched. The terminus was
a walk of five minutes from either rail
road bridge and three-quarters of a mile
from the whirlpool When I asked the
conductor to explain he replied that I
was expected to foot it tbe rest of the
way. It might not be a swindle to ad
vertise a car from Detroit to BoffaJo and
stop it at St Thomas, bat some folks
would insist that it was.
We had been down to tiie end of the
cantalovcr. and were on our way back
when a hackman drove up and offered
to take the three of us back to tbe hotel
for 75 cents. As the distance was a
mile and a half, the charge seemed
reasonable, but he was inclined, to do
still better. For the small sum of 50
cents he would Jake us down to see the
whirlpool. I give his words in. italic
because they were a swindle. The last
time i was there the whirlpool was free.
One could get out of a carriage aud
take his view from the bank. This
chap seemed to gtraranteo just such a
sight, and we bit at the bait. When he
halted, after a drive of nearly a mile, it
was at tiie door ot a curiosity store on
the bank of the river. Over "the door
was the sign: "Admittance to whirl
pool. 50 cents!" We indignantly back
ed out, aud I blessed our driver for a
swindler, telling him that he had de
liberately put up a job on us to get his
"whack" from the keeper of the store.
He made no denials, but independently
offered to leave us there and forfeit his
50 cents. His offer was accepted, and
he drove away. We footed it up to the
bridge, where a delegation of ten hack
drivers awaitod our coming. The big
gest chap in the lot got down and de
manded that half doilar. He was re
ferred to Halifax. Then he proposed to
"take it out of our hides," and the nine
fellows backing him seemed anxious to
help him. Ten Niagara Falls hackmen
ought to get away with one peaceable
in.?iv;.liil nd twnhnv hut thnp didn't
........- . V..W WWJ Vf - WHWJ W V
do it bomething was said about our
being able to shoot as fast as they could
pound, and all but one climbed upon
their vehicles and made off. This one
said he'd show us a trick or two worth
remembering, and he went off after a
crowd of his friends. He found several
who came down and looked us over as
we waited for the car, but it wasn't their
day for knocking out It was only the
next day that tho City Council sent a
complaint to the State Commissioners
that" the hack-drivers, in spite of all
laws and ordinances, were as lawless as
in years gone by.
Another swindle is the curiosity
stores. You may say that it is not
obligatory on any one to patronize
them, but at the same time most every4
visitor feels like carrying away some
souvenir or present Whatever articlo
ho pays 25 cents for can bo bought any
where else for 15. Whatever is war
ranted to him is sure to be a swindle.
Whatever he buys for original is a base
counterfeit
Why it is that such a state of affairs
has always existed al the Fails, and ap
pears determined to exist there in spite
of everything, is a problem. You can't
find tho equal of it anywhere else in
America. Tiie same system, if prac
ticed to half the extent, at any mount
ain or sea-shoro resort, would' kill the
place in two seasons. There is but oue
way for a visitor to Niagara to protect
himself. Go there with a lunch-basket
and a bottle of cold tea. Buy nothing
whatever, go to all points on foot, and
get out of the place before sundown.
You may have your pocket picked, but
?ou will have the satisfaction of be
ieving that tiie money went to some
stranger like yourself. J. Quad, in
Detroit Free I'res.t.
WIT AND HUMOR.
She "By the way, who is that lady
iu white you have been so attentive to
this evening?" He "Attentive to!
You are mistaken; that's my wife."
Life.
Baby carriages are now made to cost
as high as $375 each. This is good for
the carriage-makers, but it looks very
much like a blow at our infant indus
tries. Hostott Transcript.
Mrs. Swellingtou Jones "Really, my
dear, you owe it to your friends to get
a new dress suit"" Mr. Swellington
Jones "Well, if I do, I shall have to
owe it to my tailor." Harper's Weekly.
"Papa, what is a model?" inquired
little Johnny. "A model is a small
likeness of anything." "And is a model
man a small likeness ol a
great many of them are.
man
i"
' Merchant
Traveler.
A Jubilee. Judge: "Are you aware
of any mitigating circumstances in your
case?" Criminal "Yes, your Honor,
this is the fiftieth time 1 have been ar
rested for vagrancy, and I thought that
perhaps we might get up a little jubi
lee." Texas Sitings.
"You say you were in Germany six
months, and' in all that time you did
not see a drunken man?" "Not one."
"That is remarkable. In what part of
Germany were you all this time?" "In
jail, pard, in jail. Say, stake a fellow
for breakfast can't you?" Burdette.
Magistrate You are old enough to
know better than to drink whisky,
Uncle Rastus. Uncle Rastus I kain't
help it, yo' Honab. I inherited a tas'
fo' it. Magistrate Inherited a taste
for it? Uncle Rastus Yas, sab. Dat
boy Sam o' mine is drunk mos' ob de
time. N Y.Sun.
"Where have you beeu, Jane?" "I've
been to a meetiug of the Girls' Friendly
Society, ma'am." "Well, and what
did th"e lady say to you?" "Please,
ma'am, she said I wasn't to give you
warning, as I meant to. She said I
was to look upon you as my thorn
and bear it!"' London Punch.
A brother in Williamsburg, Va., says:
"We wish a $2,000-Baptist pastor here
who will serve us for $500. and we look
to the Religious Herald to find him for
us." Any pastor who is now on a sal
ary of $2,000 and wishes to get it re
duced to $500 will please send us his
address. Richmond Religious Herald.
"Yes, I am a poor man," he said, as a
sad look stole over his expansive coun
tenance, "but that is my misfortune. I
ought to have been worth $1,000,000.
,..? t. , . ,i ... XT' ' i!
uu. nu uuueat tuau wa uuv uaic uiuwu
"" " "Ah! you are a profession-
al man?" "No. I am an Anarchist"
1'eorin Call.
Jones Hollo, old mau. how do vou
ke married life by this time?" Smith
(comparative uew to matrimony)
"ilv.il .rute! l wo"Id" t be a bachelor
again lor a gootl bit. "Indeed! Why,
i unuerstoou your inoiuer-m-law was
living with you." "O, no. Just the
other way. I'm living with her."
"Well, that does make a difference."
I'lltsburg Dtspaldt.
Scene in Chicago. Two long separat
ed friends meet: "Where is Uncle John
living, my dear fellow?" "He isn't
living." "What! Why. whon did he
die? "He isn't dead." "(rood grac
ious! You said he isn't living, and I
iufer that he is dead." "Well, it's about
the same thing. He moved to St.
Ixnns. Newman Independent.
.Mr. Winks "Our traveling man,
Biifkius. says the thing in San Francisco
now is Japanese, not Chinese, house
servants. Everybody is getting them.'
Mrs. Wiuks "They are really good,
then?" ;Good! he says they are peer
less, absolutely without fault." "Deal
uio, we must get one. It will make that
'Heaven Bles Our Homo' motto seem
less like a mockery."
"There's one tiling I like about you,"
said Charley's girl to him the other eve
ning. -Each of mv former lovers was
continually asking me if he was the only
one 1 ever loved. You have never ask
ed me that question." "No. To tell
the truth," answered Charley, "the last
girl I asked that of ranr n chestnut-bell
on me, and I have never asked the
question siuce." N. Y. Sun.
A Washington avenue boy was left
with a neighbor while his parents went
to see a parade, and overheard the fol
lowing gossip about them: "It was a
love match. . They are a most- united
couple. After all", the right way is to
marry for love" Here the boy iuter-
rupted with: "Mamma married papa
'cause she was a fool. She said so!"
Saturday Evening Spectator.
"Are these spring chickens, Mrs.
Caterer?" "Yes, indeed, Mr. Carp.
They were foaled I meau hatched in
March." "Where did you get them'"
"From Mrs. Rubric an honest woman
and a genuine Episcopalian." "Episco
palian, is she? That accounts for the
scant upholstery on these bones. The
good woman has compelled her chickens
to keep Lent" Yonkers Uazette.
Rich and retired Socialist My son,
you must give up your reckless ways
and not squander the money I earned
by many nights on the lecture platform.
Son Give it up? Why. there's pleuty
of money left Sire Yes. but uotol
yours. Son Correct; but I aud brother
Jim have decided that you would not
tell a lie, so we are going to divide the
family estate in three even parts.
FrencJi Fun.
Mr. Doubledollar O. Yes, Minnie is
very accomplished. Wtiy, she sings iu
French, Italian and Spanish. Mr. Dc
Smytho Yes, that is very nice; but I
should think she would "learn some of
those pretty English songs that are so
popular nowadays. Mr. Doubledollar
Why, that's an English song she's
singing now. Mr. DeSmy the Indeed!
I thought it was French, Italian and
Spanish. Life.
Wandering philosopher Yes, my
dear sir, I've reckoned up that by walk
ing down-town to my business every
day 1 have saved $300 in the last ten
years. Indifferent fellow (who always
rides) and your health is better too?
Philosopher O, much better. Indif
ferent fellow Well, 1 am out that much.
Good day! Philosopher Ah. by the
way, could you lend me $5 for a few
days ruraphtc
It is related that ouce when Henry
Russell, whose singing of his own de
scriptive songs. "The Lifeboat" "The
Newfoundland Dog ' and others, is re
membered by mauy New Yorkers, was
singing the latter "song in an English
town, a man called outf "Was the
child saved, man?" He was assured that
the child was saved, aud at that asked
more earnestly: "Canst thou get mc a
pup?" A'. Y. Sun.
"Aud shall you try to breakhis will?"
the caller wanted to know, after the
widow bad told her how the recently
deceased had fixed tho property anil
rather ieft her out "Try?" the widow
echoed as she smoothed out her dress
complacently. "1 don't think there
will be much try about it 1 didn't have
anv trouble breaking his will when he
was alive, and I dou t think it is going
to trouble mc any tnis time."
At the Southeast Indiana Conference
iu Indianapolis a speaker, referring to
the hardships of the early days in the
West turned to the venerable Joseph
Tarkingham, aged eighty-six years, and
said: "I am glad. Father Tarkingham,
that 1 did not enter the itinerancy at
tho time you did." "1 am sorry I did,"
said the old man. "But I'm not a good
horseback rider." said the speaker.
"Well, I am." answered Father Joseph.
"I can break a colt yet"
"Ho, sir! he did not die of pneumonia:
he died of bill brokers, sir. He pro
jected an unwise improvement ol a
piece of real estate, made loans, covered
himself with bonds aud mortgages, and
finally incurred a street debt of $2,000,
which rapidly rolled up to $8,000 aud
crushed the life out of him. He borrow
ed money on call, got paper discounted,
and he worked, lived, and died for the
bill brokers. Yes. sir, he died of a street
debt, upou which he expended his
strength every week, throwing it ahead
from one day to seven." Dry Goods
Chronicle.
Langtry's First Appearance.
Apropos of Mrs. Langtry's exceeding
beauty as Pauline, in the "Lady of
Lyons," Mrs. Paran Stevens tells in a
very graphic fashion of the first time
she ever saw the lady on the day of
her first public appearance in London
society. It was at a great tea given by
the Coldstream guards at the tower, to
which some two thousand people were
invited. There had been rumors of a
famous new beauty from Jersey, and of
course her portrait had been seen in the
Royal academy exhibit, but with the
exception of a favored few who had met
her at small affairs she had not been
revealed to the London world. "She
came in when the thing was about half
over," said Mrs. Stevens, "and people
began to whisper about that the new
beauty bad appeared, and to stand on
tiptoe and crane their necks to catch a
glimpse of her. She was a perfect vis
ion of loveliness. Dressed in a simple
little black frock, cut square at the neck
aqd showing her throat, that was white
as milk, and her face framed by a wide,
black Gainsborough hat she made a
complete conquest of the fashionable
world at first glance. Everything went
down before her. and by tbe next morn
ing she was the most-talked-of woman
in'Englaud. I confess I was quite as
enthusiastic as the rest of the world, for
I adore pretty women, and I thought
her the prettiest I bad ever seen. She
seemed quite perfect from her slender
feet to the two rows of pearls she
showed every time she smiled. She
was excited and a little shy, and a rosy
glow came and went in her cheeks,
which only made her more irresistible.
They tell me she has grown rounded
now, but then she was very slim and
girlish, and looked much too young to
be married. What a triumph that sea
son was to her, to be sure! Probably
no other woman has ever been so petted
aud idolized by the fashionable set in
London.
"Her father was the handsomest man
in England, so she came by her beauty
through direct inheritance. He was
dean of Jersey, as you know, and I saw
the father and daughter come into din
ner together one uight be in his cleri
cal garb and she in full evening dress,
and' I thought then, and think still, that
I bad never seen more perfect types of
masculine and feminine beauty. I
have not seen her since she went on tbe
stago; at one time I knew her quite
well."
He Rose to the Occasion.
Tbe greatest argument against kings
is that when the king hasn't got his
crown and his insignia vou cau't tell
him from anybody else, and if you put
a millionaire behind a bar, even by ac
cident, people will come in and demand
cocktails of him, and probably tell him
to hurry up, as thirsty people who want
to get along to the next saloon -usually
da But r have never heard of any
such mistake so neatly turned. s.at a
big party a few weeks ago. eA foreign
gentleman, while engaged iri foraging
tor a plate for a lady he nad taken in to
supper, came on a man with a plate in
his hand, looking at it in an aimless
way. He thought be was a lazy waiter.
"Give me that plate, please."
Tbe .austere figure turned and gazed
upon him silently.
"Give me that plate, waiter."
There was do sign. It began to daw n
upon the guest that he was mistaken
and finally he recognized in the figure
a well known millionaire, who was ap
parently bent on the same errand. Auv
plain American would have fainted.
Tbo foreign gentleman was equal to the
occasion.
"Pardon me, sir. I did not recog
nize you, and we are both dressed so
like the waiters that tho mistake might
have as easily been yours as mine.
San Francisco Chronicle.
"By the way," exclaimed Smithers,
"have you two fives for a ten?" "I
have," responded Jobeon. "Then lend
me one of them." Pittsturg ftf gfojk
THE
CHICAGO SHOUT LING
OF TIIK
St. Ml Railway.
THE BEST ROUTE
From OMAHA and COUNCIL BtUFFS
TO THE KAST.
I3 Trait lidj letwaea caSa, CnscU Sha,
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St. Paul, Minneapolis, Cedar Rapids,
Clinton, Dubuque, Davenport,
Rock Island.Freeport, Rockford,
Elgin, Madison, Janesville,
Beloit, Winona, La Crosse.
And all other Important Points
Xortheast and Southeast.
E.ISt,
Kcr through tickets call on the Ticket
Agent at Columbus, Xehraxka.
Pullman lkkikks and the FiMtoT
Dimm; Cars in the Woi:li are run on
tbe main lines of the Cbicugto. Mil.
waakeeA Nt.Panl Ky, and everv
attention is paid to pnseuijers by cour
teous employe of the Company.
St. Jllller, A. V. II. Carpeater,
General Alan ger. (ienM Pass. Ajj't.
J. F. Tvcker, CJco. II. Ua Jtertl.
Asi't Gen'1 31an. Ans't Pass. Air't.
J. X. Clark, Gett'l Kttn't.
Feb. 17-1
ALWAYS THE BEST
AND
Up to the Times.
DAILY
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The Proprietors of The Daily Nebraska state
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and The JoessAL each morning will present a com
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15,(W0 complete copies of the paper an hour, we will
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.8. District and Circuit
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IMPORTANT
TO ALL
Farmers
Gardeners
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AND ALI.
ttouse&eepers
In Village, City, and Country!
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Secure at Wry I Attic Cost',
aforiaatien that will often re
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Read tbe following: :
ORANGE JUlD,tlit Eriitorand build
erupof what was formerly the most valua
ble and widely circulated Rural and Kumily
'ournal in this country, is now Editing,
and with his SONS publishing tho M'ceUy
PRAIRIE FARMER at Chicago.
Under the New Management, this old .
Journal (established in 1841). luw be
como one of the moat Valuable Sources
of Practical, Reliable Information in t1-.,
United States. It is exceedingly lM-ft:l
to Eivcry Hun, Woman and t'SiWtl
in Country, Yili::t or i'itj, for tho
Farm and all grown upon it. its Crop-, its
Livestock, GiiruVu. Fruits and- Flowers.
A!! EBOrSEKES'ERSevery when
will find in the f'i"'iri ForMff mo-t "a:a
able. Useful Ji:fti"iutin aWut ry Liud
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pared and edi:-.l ly intelligent Women
who write auid t.tlk. tthout what they thetn
:tlve; IK), and is not a "settlor and paste"
ussortinent of things that nit rosy rend well.
. IVautiful, IMtistratoil Journal coming
Eveiy Week U t:.e l :r,'r Ftiiiiar It has
tenfoldetl its Chctlation under th new
ManHtjt'iuen:. tn-l 'it-serves n. Jlrsf place in
Every Home. :il will pay at any Cost.
it
Trifling
Cost.
2gT Our Kea-h-n can note have Prttirie
Fanner in connection with our Journal
at Very Snail Cost. The price until
recently was $3 a year, and cheap at that,
but is now reduced to $1.50 a year. And
Dctler Still: We have made arrange
ments with the publishers, by means of
which wo propose to supply the Weekly
Prairie Farmer
AND TUB
COLUMBUS J0UBNAL,
Roth for only $2.75 a year.
(The separate price is 3.50 a year.)
You will get "from the Prairie Farmer
Multitudes of Hints and Suggestions, and
Useful, Practical Information that will be
worth many Dollars, often Hundreds of
Dollars. TRY IT.
BETTER STILE.. Subscribers be
ginning now for 1887 will receive all the
weekly numbers of the Prairie Farmer
the rest of this Year Free of Charge.
Send In your Subscription AT ONCE,
and get the benefit of these extra copies.
IT WILL PAY YOU
A HUNDRED FOLD.
HP" Specimens of Papers on Application.
Cures Guaranteed!
DR. WARN S SPECIFIC No. 1.
A Certain Cure for Nervous Debility,
Seminal Weakness, Involuntary Emis
sions, Spermatorrhea, and all diseases of
the genito-urinary organs caused by self
abuse or over indulgence.
Price, $1 00 per box, six boxes $5.00.
DR. WARN'S SPECIFIC No. 2.
For Epileptic Fits, Mental Anxiety,
Loss of Hemory, Softening of the Braiir,
and all those diseases of the brain. Prie
$1.00 per box, six boxes $5.00.
DR. WARN'S SPECIFIC No. 3.
For Impotence, Sterility in either er.
Loss of Power, premature old age, and all
those diseases requiring a thorough in
vigorating of the sexual organs. Price
$'J.OO per box, six boxes $10.00.
DR. WARN'S SPECIFIC No. 4.
For Headache, Nervous Neuralgia, and
all acute diseases of the nervous system.
Price 50c per box, six boxes $2.50. "
DR. WARN'S SPECIFIC No. 5.
For all diseases caused by the over-use
of tobacco or liquor. This remed v is par
ticularly efficacious in averting palsy and
delirium tremens. Price $1.00 pur ox, .
six boxes $5.00.
We Guarantee a Cure, or agree to re
fund double the money paid. Certificate
in each box. This guarantee applies to
each of our u've Specifics. Sent by mail
to any address, secure from observation,
on receipt of price. 15c careful to mention "
the number of Specific wanted. Our
Specifics are only recommended for spc
cilic diseases. IJeware of remedies war
ranted to cure all these diseases with one
medicine. To avoid counterfeits aud al- .
ways secure tne genuine, order only from
iiowty st cm::.
DRUG' GISTS,
I!M Columbus, Neb.
Health is Wealth!
Da E. C. West's Nebte and Vtaxrs Tmut
Kest, a guarantwxl srcilic fur ITysteria. Ditzi
neee, Convnlsiona, Fitrf. JCcrroua. Neuralgia,
lieauachn. Nervous Prostration caused by tbo usa
01 alcohol or tobacco. walCPtuiuees. Jiental lte
preesion. Softening of tho Brain resulting in in
sanity and leading to znibciy. decay and death.
Premature Old Ago. iiarrenness. Lota of power
in either box. Involuntary Ixmeoa and Bpormat
Drrhcra caused byover-nxt-rtion of thobram. elf
abuse or orer-indulcgnco. Kirh box contains)
one month's treatment. ft.fOa boi.oreix boiss)
foriSXU.sentbymatl prepatdoa receiptor pace.
WE GFAKA VTEE SIX BOXES
Tocure any case. With each order received bytM
(or six boxes, accompanied with $5X0, wa will
send the purcha&er our written guarantee to re
fund the money if the treatment doei&otetfect
euro. Guaranttyse itutuedonlyby
JOHN O. WEST & CO.,
862 W. MADISON ST., CHICAGO, ILLS.,
Sole Prop's West's Llvee Pills.
S500 REWARD!
lraj.atl. ! by sUd,HMr !!
WW mil 1 it.m... J-Mrw'a-."lw
I "vrl I BRAUH I
I sgHLtfi MLagH
2" o Terr -3 M
Z.'Eo.-t 3 n-a SB
o ?B&r.jsX.j.Bjfjjflf
ITi-WIHIH
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