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About The Columbus journal. (Columbus, Neb.) 1874-1911 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 27, 1886)
i! 4 ! 1 4 1 U III! h' , ! r i' l J: e Soaie Day Xo'll Think of Me. 8oae day. my darling, when the rose hH died. That on your pathway throws its petals aweet. When the sharp thorn is springing near your fiidC And nettles pierce the mold beneath your feet. You'll wish for me. Someday, my darling, when the crystal cup Of Beauty shattered lies, and 6pillcd its wine When Pleasure's urn denies your lips ono And you drink deep of Disappointment'! brine. You'll wish for me. 8omo day the wreath will wilt upon thy head. You'll smell tbe bud and And a worm witn- Bomc'day, my darling, when your friends And strangers mock your frequent tears, ah! then You'll wish for me. Bomo day. my darling, when Death's dews Upon11 your brow, you'll gladly let me When dreams present the shroud that must 'Your limbs, and your sweet lips grow chill - and dumb. You'll wish for me. You'll long for nlm whoso hands were oft To plucka rose lest they tho bush pollute Tet no would come and stand a slave aside. To grasp the bramble and the thorn up- If you but wished for him. He'd kiss your feet the bidden briar bad Andbathc the wounds with Pity's saddest He'd tcke your eyes that ne'er till death had l For him one look of love, and at your bier He'd kneel and pray Foratrength to watch you hidden from his For8strengtb to turn aside and leave you Clasped In the arms of everlasting night; Aiid yet, my darling, not as great despair He'd feel than now. A GROANING GHOST. Some five-and-thirty years ago, when I was a young man, my father s busi ness experienced a sudden and severe check. We were many in family, and the expenses of education were heavy. It was necessary to retrench. My father's place of business lay in the heart of the city. We had to keep horses, if only to take myself and my father to and from the city. Tho most important articles in our scheme of re trenchment were our horses and car riages. For all these reasons we re solved to more eastward to within easy reach of our place of business. My brother and myself were commissioned to find a suitable house. After a long search we selected a t...A 4t..itcvwTat tlm mrnfirof a auiet. sobcr-lookinsr. very old-fashioned square. Being the corner house it was larger than the other houses, and appeared just suited to the wants of our family. The next day I was lunching at my usual chop-house along with two or three acquaintances. Still house-hunting. Demon?" said one of these. "No, thank heaven," I said. "We ve got a house at 4ast In square. square," echoed he, thought fully. "Why square is the . Which number have you got?" No. 45," I said. He threw his head back and burst into a lit of laughter. Tho other men lauged. too. I looked from one to another for explanation. "When you've done," said I with dignity. . Why, don't you know," said my friend, recovering his gravity, "No. 45 square is haunted?" 1 saw the other men looking at me. so I put on a bold front "As if everv one didn't know that, said I compoMiillv. He was somewhat taken aback, hut returned to the charge. Well, vou'll lutvo plenty of com pany there"." he said. "Wo shall have you appearing in the city with a fine head ot snow-while hair, acquired in a single night Poor old boy!' "Don't you be afraid," 1 retorted. "There are enough of us to frighten any ghost. We shall erowd him out" "I bet you a new hat you don't stop there a week," said he. "Done with you," said I promptly. "As often as you like. Any one else want to bet?" No one volunteered and the subject dropped. But I was extntmcly uncom fortable. In the course of the after noon 1 took my brother aside and told him. "Phew!" said he. "That explains the low rent But it's rather serious. The governor can't stand anything of the sort. You know how nervous he is." "Yes. I know," I said. "And it strikes me that tho best thing we can do is to move into the house ourselves, en vc& ran toll him the storv is a mvth if any one lets it out to him. Just you and I." "Right," said he. "We have taken the house and we can't afford to lose the money. Besides, it's such a capital place." The whole family were to move in About three weeks' "time. We had no difficulty in finding a pretext for pre ceding them, and it was arranged that some of the bedroom furniture should be immediately sent in to our new domicile. We were going to 6ell most of our furniture in our West End house, and the new furniture could bo bought immediately, and placed in No. 45. So at about 10 o'clock ono evening, after a substantial dinner in town, we let ourselves into our new abode by means of the key, and took possession. A bright lire, lit bv our landlaudy, was blazing in the kitchen. We had a 1A:71 cii.-k.lt' nf nliicb-v inil fnliniwrv and we made ourselves comfortable with our slippers and lounging coat?, and prepared for a night of it "Uncommonly comfortable," said my brother, approvingly. "Gad. the old Lady knows how to make a tire!" "And what a grate! And a chimney as big as a blast-furnace. There is nothing like one of theso old-fashioned kitchens for comfort" Ensconced in our chimney corners we passed the time luxuriously enough. We bad made up our minds -to sit up all night and show the ghost what manner of men he had to deal with. "We'll take the ghost by the horns," said my brother. "I only hoH5 we shan't have to take the devil by his." I was not quite so complacent, for I in herited something of my father's nerv ous temperament However, 1 had company, and there was Dutch courage in tbe whiskv bottle, so I kept up a stout heart We were very cheerful and light-hearted at first Wo talked over various boyish escapades; we criticised the characters of our friends and relations; we got tho fidgets; wo found we could not smoke forever with out burning our mouths. Finally the fumes of whisky and tho heat of the fire had their inevitable effect and we began to doze. 1 f do not know how long I had been asleep, but I suddenly awoke with a violent start A cold shudder ran through me from head to foot 1 had an indefinable sensation of something strange and terrible. I rose and stretched myself and tried to feel at my easy. But I could not I touched iny brother and he awoke. "Hello!" he said. "What's the mat ter? Why. I've been asleep! What's the time?" Two o'clock," said I. Just tho time for a ghost," said he with unseemly levity. "Do you know. Will. I don't think he'll come here. Ghosts are uncomfortable things and don't like good fires- Get too much of them where they are, 1 suppose. Let's go and look for him." ": uAnirtliinir fnr n nhanmi " Mill 1 1- 'thoueh the thought of perambulating fiiat great lonesome mansion in tbe 4mA of night was anything but agree- I ?te. "I am wide awake. "So am I," said lie. and taking up the brass candlestick he went towards the door. I followed him ciose. We passed along tfic passage, our stealthy footfalls making a faint sound on: tho uncarpetcd floor. Wo heard and -saw nothing. We ascended the stairs.' Everv individual stair creaked horribly, but that was'all. No ghost My brother suddeniy opened the door of a bedroom on the ifrst floor. Instant-. ly a gust of air blew the candle out And as we stood there in the cold we distinctly heard a groan. It was no fancy. It was a long-drawn, wailing moan of inexpressible horror and pa thos. It died away in a despairing ca dences. It seemed like the sorrowful la ment of a soul in torment As we stood there grasping each other's hands, with our hearts throbbing in great pulsa tions, it came again. O, the horror of it! It seemed to be in the room and close to us. The cold was deathly, the silence broken only by that weird and awful moan. Once more it rose and fell and somehow or other the next moment we found ourselves in the kitchen, with shaking limbs and ashen faces, relighting our extinguished can dles. Then we looked at each other. "That was no fancy. Will," said my brother. "Fancy no," I replied, my teeth chattering in my head. "What are you going to do?" For my brother had relit the candle and was moving away. Tm going to have another look," he said. "But, perhaps," I suggested, "the "I'll give Trim another chance," said my brother, coolly. "Come along, you chattering idiot." I was too shat tered to resent this unflattering de scription, and with a quaking heart I followed his foolhardy footsteps. This time ho opened the door more cautious ir. nnd we entered with everv nerve strung to. its utmost tension. Holding the candle on high, we looked around. I Pure vacuity. And the sound came not again. "Poor old chap," said my brother, i "He can't stand the light Shall I blow ; it out again?" "If you do ," said I. "But, jok ing apart, who is going to sleep in this room? I'm not, for one. And this would naturally be the governor's room. My brother was struck. "loir re right, he saui; "we must , get to the bottom of this. We'll find it out somehow. And now I think we may go to bed. I'll just look around." He examined the room carefully, but there was nothiusr to be seen, neither was there anything to be heard. So we gave up the thing for that night and went to bed. I could not sleep a wink. Mv nerves were completely unstrung. After a night of tossing anil fever, I awoke unrefreshed and mightily pleased to find myself in broad daylight At noon that day 1 had to run the gauntlet of my friends. And, I am bound to say, I HedTikc Ananias. As the day grew on I grew more and more un comfortable and I fairly dreaded the or deal of the ensuing night. As before, we dined in town. It was a line night and we took a walk around the square before turning iu. The houses all looked cheerful with their bright lights Ours alone was black and gloomy. We agreed that at 2 o'clock precisely wo would again visit the haunted room. There was no danger of our going to sleep to-night vc wcropainiuny wiuo awake. All sorts of wild conjectures crossed my mind as we sat by the kitchen fire, waiting for tho appointed hour. Perhaps some maniac bad taken up his abode in the house and roved about at night uttering that awful noise. Or perhaps "some wily person had a fancy to live rent-free and had adopted this method of frightening the tenants iway. In any case the effect was sullicicntly horrible. The shock to one's nervous system was the same, whatever the cause. The whisky ebbed fast, but not so fast as my courage. My brother, cool and practical, was deep in thought He was not likely to indulge the wild speculations that crossed my brain. He was seeking some material explanation of the weird phenomenon. At hist the hour began to sound. At the first stroke mv brother arose and took up the can dle. I had provided my&eU with a second candle on my own account. We examined the rooms on the ground floor without success. We ascended the stairs and paused outside the haunt ed chamber. The passagers and the stairs abovo us were thick with shad ow. My brother turned the handle. I j tbe"veird sound died away as we I , enfrd In a moment it came again. It rose and swelled and died sorrowfully away. It was singularly human. Yet it was beyond all description unearthly. No banshee could wail in sadder or more thrilling tones. We stood there like Dante and Virgil, except that the au thor of the "Inferno" nnd his guide did not wear carpet-slippers or carry brass candlesticks. Neither had they such extraordinary rough heads of hair as we had. 1 felt mine going gray very fast And a cold stream of terror trickled down my back. My brother stood still and listened intently. The ?;host groaned again, and yet again, n fact he kept on groaning. It was frightful. The wail began in a whis per; it swelled to an acute pitch; it died away in a note of woe that thrilled one's t.n.t..- I, .nno nntful tr Ctimt fllOTVl IllUill I. 4I WH9 nnilll IAS ..., feu,', waiting for the sound to conin again. "He's in good voice to-night," he said, approvingly. "A bit hoarse, but I don't wonder" at that. Still, I wish he'd try another key. He's been at this long enough. And he might got him self tuned hush!" 1 quite expected some supernatural visitation to rebuke this ill-timed levity. None came. My brother, having politely waited until the ghost bad finished, began again: "All these groans are exactly alike," he said, considering. "That's odd, isn't it? Will. I'll tell you what The ghost's up the chimney." Once more the sound came, as though to confirm his words. And it certainly did appear to proceed from the region of the fire place. "Still," resumed my brother, thought fully, a ghost in a chimney is an un comfortable sort of thing. Will, we'll havo that chimney swept Fancy a ghost coming down with the soot We'll see about it the first thing tomorrow." This awful threat appeared too much for our unearthly visitor, for he gave tongue no more that night We went to bed, and I dreamed that the spirit of a chimneysweep appeared to me and confessed to the murder of one of tho little boys who were still employed in those days in his profession. However, I got some sleep. I got none the previ ous night We left the office early in the after noon. We secured the services of an intelligent sweep and a sharp little bright-eyed boy. The chimney was amply wide for the youngster to climb, and up he went We waited in sus pense. When Ire came down he reported that he bad found nothing. We ques tioned him eagerly, hut he had seen no ghost or anything belonging to one. Wc sent him up again. This time he found out something. This chimney communicated with the one next door. "That will be the kitchen chimney next door." said my brother. "We must explore that" Our landlady was considerably amazed when n we pre? sented ourselves and asked to be al lowed to explore., After a little demur, however, she ; consented. There was but' a small fire in the grate, and this was lakeu out "I don't make it up until 11 .o'clock, at night" she explained. "Not until my master comes home tired after his day's work. Then we have our bit of supper and drinK.our.grog.aud wo like to seo il cheerful blnz. .JJatJn tho day 1 don't totiblu abont U.'V -The boy went tip smartly and 'shortly" reap peared. "Why, you've got a smoke-jack up there, missis," said he. "What's a smoke-jack?" said my brother hastily. The sweep explained. "It's a h-apparatus for roasting meat fixed in the chimbluy. It has little sails like, just like a windmill, only they are laid flat instead of being upright The hot airs comes up from the lire and blows these sails around. Then there's a cog-wheel and that communicates the motion to a fly-wheel. A chain passes round the fly-wheel, coining down to the .crate, and turns the spit" "But where are the chains?" "O, they've been taken off; I suppose. It isn't used now." "I didn't know it was there," said oar landlady. "Doesn't it make a noise?" asktd my brother, with a quick look at me. "We don't hear it," replied the land lady indifferently. "Will." said my brother, "just run back to the bedroom and listen. I be lieve we've got it I'm going to send the boy up to turn the thing. I did as he requested. When I got into the room the ghost was groaning in splen did form. He was going far faster than I had ever heard him before. The mystery was solved. We kept our secret We were the ad miration of every one who knew the story of the honse. And for a very sub stantial reduction in the rent of a very comfortable house we had to thank tho Groaning Ghost Belgravia. HE MET THEM. A Granger's Experience With Sleek-Look-log Men as Told by Himseir. A short, thick-set man. abont 55 years of age. with little twinkling black eyes. a short, stubby gray beard, and a very red face, alighted from the Falls train Saturday night In one hand the little old man carried a massive oak walking stick and the other was engaged in clutching an old-timo carpel bag that had evidently done sen-ice for ages. A wide-brimmed soft felt hat. from under which now and then a strangling lock of yellow hair was seen, and a red handkerchief around his neck did not make the farmer a beauteous creature to look upon. When the train had made a stop the old gentleman commenced pacing up and down the platform in an excited way, muttering to himself. Seeing a baggageman, he walked up to him and striking the oak stick on the floor with a force that would have been a credit to a trip-hammer, said: "Say, my name's John Graham. I'm from Dutchess county. I am, and I'm in kind of a hustle to git hum. Can you tell me when the cars go?" "Whore do you want to go?" asked the baggage fiend. Ter Poughkeepsio, by gosh. I own a rattlin' farm down there." On being informed that tho train he desired to take left at 11:30 the old man started for the waiting-room, where he met a reporter, and asked: "Say, friend, whero can an old man get a drink of water?" After following the direction indi cated, and relieving his thirst, the farmer returned to the platform and as tonished the station men with his feats of pedestrianism as he went from one end of the station to tho other with pro digious strides. Finally he walked up to a number of men wno were sitting on a truck and again asked about the train. After being told, one of the men asked him where he lived. "Down near Poughkeepsie," he answered. Been away on a visit?" was. the next question. "Yaas, I've sorter ben visitin' my dater up in Berrian county, Michigan. Sho got married and moved up thar some years ago, and I haint seen her until I went up thar. I'm on my way hum now, bun I'm a blanked old idiot. I am. I've been robbed, skinned right out of my money." ami he jammed the stick down so fiercely that all of his auditors jumped. "How's that, friend?" asked one of tbe listeners. "When 1 left hum,'' replied the farm er, "I took about 110 with me, besides what it coat me to go and come. It didn't cost me anything up at John's, but blarst my skin if 1 hain't out nigh on ter 330. Jes' after the cars left Detroit I was sittin' iu the scat and a kinder good-lookin' sort of a man came in and sat down next to me and com menced talkiu', and I'll be blasted ef he wasn't a darned nice feller. Bimeby another man came in with a valise and asked if the other seat was taken. I said 'No.' and he sot down. We talked and talked and I got quite well ac quainted with him, and we eat lunch to gether. After a while one fellow took out a little box and laid a paper on his knee and said: -I've just picked up something new, friends, and don't mind showing it It is a neat little gag.' "He had three little silver things like a ball cut in two, and a little square button, and the trick was to tell where the button was. Gosh. I guessed five or six times and hit it every jump. Bimeby the other man bet a dollar that be could guess, and he guessed and got the chink. Sol bet like a darned fool, as my wife says I alters was, and I got it Gosh, I kept right on bet tin' and I'll be blowed ef I ain't short $30 to the best callerlation, and those fellows are bavin' a good time on my money. I don't know what John'H do when he asks me to pay the thrashin' bill. Oh, hut I'm an old fool, just as Mehitable laid." Rocficstcr Democrat. i - w CANTON. Strange Sight In Bewildering Old City. I am sure that Canton is tbe queerest, the most wonderful and bewildering old city under the sun. It certainly has more strange sights to tbe square yard than any other city I ever saw, and I am willing to back it against all the rest Even now, when I try to recall the strange scenes and sounds I encoun tered on that memorable visit, it makes my eyes ache and my brain whirl, just as it did then. Well, well, well! What a wonderful old city it is! How bewildering, and how interesting at every step! This is no more like the Chinese quarter of Hong Kong than an old bill is like a now silver dollar. How very, very dif ferent from what we had expocted to see! Compared with the substantial newness and Europeanness of Hong Kong, this is a veritable fossil, a relic of the past, with nothing of the nineteenth century about it save the European quarter and the steamer on the river. The city is all on the ground, or, at the very most, it will not average more than a story and a half in height Where the shops are thickest, each square is an unbroken succession of wide door ways; far of every shop the whole end next to tbe street takes out bodily. From one street corner to tbe next there is only a succession of open-ended rooms and partition walls, with dark, narrow 5assages thrown in. here and there, 'here is no architecture .visible, for the houses are so jammed together that it is impossible to single out any one in particular without climbing on the roof to see bow much it covers. If this is not a street m Wonderland it might as well be. It is only about ; eight feet wide,' and many are less. The j eaves of the houses on each side project ! a quarter or a third, of the way. across the street; and-tbiTemjOllug-third in tho middle is very often loosely covered over with boards placed crosswise. When the sun is shining the streets are light enough, but in rainy or cloudy weather they arc very dark and gloomy, and the peculiar twilight effect only adds another element of strangeness to the scene. Thank goodness, the streets arc well paved with smooth, granit flag stones, one foot by three, and being kept very clean there is no mud to plod through, even when it rains. Pedes trianism is the order of the day. There are no carriages, carts, drays, big freight wagons, omnibuses, or street cars to run over you if you fail to get out of the way, for all the freight is car ried by coolies. Now and then, however, your wool gathering is disturbed by a stir and loud shouting a little way down the street, and you see the crowd parting to right and left Then you know theie is a sedan chair coming and you take shelter behind a sign-board, or in a fricudly doorway, or flatten yourself against a wall until the juiri pate tic nui sance has goue by. But the streets are so narrow that chairs are not very often used. They move too slowly; it takes too much shouting to clear the way. and when two meet iu a narrow thoroughfare one has to be side-tracked before the other can go by. Tho use of the chair, therefore, is confined to lazy merchants and ofliccrs, weak women and swell Europeans. For iny pari, I would not do Canton in u seduu chair if I could have a whole set for nothing. But there is one drawback to pedes trianism. As you pass along you are obliged to bo on the alert to keep from coming into collision with half-naked coolies, carrying all sorts of loads.' All loads are carried in the same way; every school-boy knows it so I will not stop to describe it No matter where you go, you can be certain that every few minutes one of these coolies will come puffing and shuffling along at a dog trot, shouting every few steps to those in front of him to" "clear the track," his load springing up and down, and Ids bamboo lathee creaking rhythmi cally at every step. The Cosmopolitan. Oar Sunday Night Teas. 1 believe in a good dinner on Sunday, the only day in the week when the gude man of my house has his dinner with , his family." 1 also believe iu making Sunday a day of rest and gladness for my faithful, hard-worked Chloe. How , to combine these two things has long been a problem, which at lust we have solved, to the entire satisfaction of all concerned. We have dinner at half-past one, when we come from Sunday School. The table is laid with snowy cloth and the best china always, and generally j for one guest We like to bring home with us some home-sick student or pale faced teacher, who only boards, not lives, or a friend who loves a Sunday "sing," and can help with fingers or voice. Chloe, in a fresh calico and roKltrfc nrkfAn tnntAa em . tvoit fT no I1U1IV UUIUU VWIUlsO 1A IU Va.h.t 1U UJf when her dinner, nicely served and garnished, is ready. In summer we give up soup, nnd have a lettuce or to mato salad between the meat course and dessert, and there is always coffee or tea last The dinner is the plcasunlcst ami most leisurely of the week, as well as the nicest As much as possible is pre- ' pared on Saturday. By four o'clock Chloe has everything cleared away, her breakfast table neatly set, nnd goes smiling out of the side door in her best array, not to return till ten o'clock. On a side table iu the dining-room she has set out a waiter, with a plate of thin bread and butter nicely piled, a basket of eake, a pitcher of ice-water, another of milk, a dish of baked apples or fruit, over all a napkin. There is also the little Japanese tray atid tea things, with which the tea is always made on the table, instead of being boiled and spoiled in the kitchen. If it is wiuter, she leaves the tea-kettle ready to boil at a minute's notice. In slim mer I boil the water in a saucepan over the kitchen gus. It lakes live minutes, ami that is all the work to be done for our Sunday night teas. The meal is made perfectly informal. If we are go ing to evening service, nix iiii.lcind and I sometimes take ours when we come home, and let the rest of the family have theirs when thuy choose. Sometimes we have happy Sunday evenings at home, all together. These are the best, and will have a hold on the children, I am sure, while they live. There are long, quiet chats, with "Papa" in the middle of the sofa, the little heads ou each side nestled close; or our favorite gamo, each repeating a Hue of poetry, beginning witu A, and so going through the alphabet; or sing out of our beautiful Sunday School Hymnal, which is so much underrated by people in geueral. Ou theso even ings our tea becomes a real pleasure. I bring the waiter into the library, and put it on a little, round table before the open fire. While the Souchong is brew ing in the little, blue china teapot, the children pass the bread and butter, or everybody helps himself in picnic fash ion without ceremony. In summer the little table is wheeled out on the piazza, and we have our tea there, with the shadows of the vine leaves dauoing over us while we watch the sinking sun. Ten minutes is more than enough to gather up the few dishes afterward. The children, happy in anything out of week-day routine, say, "How lovely Sunday is!" And we elders think. How good God is who gave us our home! Mrs. S. II. Oilman, in Good Housekeeping. . SOME STRANGE HANDS. There I a Great Deal of Character in Them ir We Only Knew It. Hands reveal habits, occupations, trades, says a writer in Cassell's Faintly Magazine. A crop of them rises at the thought, like the show thrust up from a crowd in honor of a candidate after an election speech. There is the carpen ter's, with the broad thumb, and those of tbe fraternity of flour, ingrained, mealy, and white; the musician's with the powerful .wrist andjhe lingers deli cate, sensitive, and agile to the last de gree; the hand of the seamstress, with an honorable little bit of nutmeg-grater on the forefinger that works so hard; of the scientific man, who lectures to ex plain mysteries to lower mortals, and whose exactitude of touch is the image of his mental precision, while the nerv ous stretch of his fingers corresponds with his tension of mind. The slight-of-band professor is a man of long fingers. A conjurer with a slow and chubby band would betray the aw ful secrets of the plum-pudding that is taken from the depths of your best hat But besides character and trade, the hands tell the age. Soft and round, the baby's pair of puff-balls, with their fat wrists deeply ringed, appear as if they never can do anything in this world. Yet the girl's hand will become a treas ure, and the boy's hand will battle with life and with his fellow-men for tho mastery. It is appalling to think of what those helpless puff-balls have be fore them. After the first dimples they become the inky bands of school; then the awk ward hands that don't know what to do with themselves. Years pass, tbe boy's hands ceases to grumble at gloves yef, be wears them in extravagant freshness, in comparison as his collars grow up ward, and hi shoes tighten within an inch of his life. Tho result of these phenomena is that a ring begins to shiue with charming strangeness on an other hand, that seemed a child's but Csterday. Tbe young wife tells by her nda that it is not long since the wed ding, because she cannot let that new ring alone, but twists it around for tbe novelty, aud admires it with an uncon scious knack of carressing it in idle mo--indents. P61" dimples disappear, as the children gather to make a home circle; it is the hand of tin: woman now, with its very framework traceable. Dimples, bones, and wrinkles mark the three stages of life's piogri-ss. With the wrinkled staj;e the su-.idincss of youth often remains iu re&oluto clKinic ters. When the "Juke of Wellington was a very old man he could still nil a glass of water to tho l:u.t possible drop and hold it up .steadih brimful. The helpful hands keep l!;c:r youthful ac tivity, too. far into the withering age. Aud in nobry-lovin; natures there is a sort of inunort.iiiiy t yoiiili; the warmth of affection has g.tcii more than a royal prerogative; the " baud i beautiful al ways to the eyes tli.it know ii familiar ly. " The later yenn: o:iI M imp il with tbe impress of a longer pat of tender ness, fnitlifiilne.-s, and bounty. It is not the "old" hand bi:t the -dear' band, and it never grows older, but only more dear. lie who do:iits tin Irnlli of this last mystery h:is poi i found out that hands :iswel! as ln-.-nt. have a jn-culiar place iu our knowledge aud love of one another. Pulling Fodder. Pulling fodder looks like a hard busi ness, writes Bill Arp to the Atlanta Constitution. M tenants get to the field early wh!!oih'grasand the weeds aud the morning glory vines are all wet with dew, and the ground is sticky with moisture. They are sojii wet up to their knees, unit their pants flop around their nukie.s and the dewdrops full in their sleeves, but they don't seem to mind it By and by as the sun mounts up over them the dew disappears, and the sultry heat comes down ami there is no chance for a breeze in tin: low ground corn, but still they pull away, and talk and laugh as merry as if ihev were having afroiic Then he has to tie it up aud carry it through long rows to the end of the field, and the big pile of twenty or thirty bundles is all over his head and his shoulders, ami he goes bumping along the cornstalks and gets the trash all down his neck nnd in his eyes, but still he don't mind it. and brag's how many bundles he carried am! never dropped nary one. There is something mighty cheerful about willing labor, toil that is content ed sweat that is no curse. 1 couldn't pull foilik'r if 1 was willing, but 1 am not willing. If 1 hail a step-ladder and a boy to lote il along from stock to stock and there was no dew nnd sun was behind a cloud. I might venture a short row. Ueing willing is the great thing about labor. Being williug is the secret of success in anything. I heard an old man say that any man could quit drinking whisky or chewing tobacco if he was willing. He must get his own coiiM-ut the lirst thing, aud then it :s easy to do. It is a man's nature to work up ex actly to his tension. His task must be done. Pulling fodd'-r is disagreeable, but the farmers' mind has neen worked up to that for years and so il is all right It is part of iiis business. We all string up our n rves and our will .to the ten sion of our comiiiiou, our necessities. It is like turning the mtcv on a violin to gi the .trings up to the chord. When they si sekini they won't play in har mo'iy and we niiisL ti-Jilcn the tension again. ir. Felion live- two miles from town. :tiid I Nc iv. and my nabor Wit-in- iie- !!. '1 in; doctor's road is just as long to it. m :is mine is to me, or a-the leu miies is to Nabor Wecms. We have all got twetl to the task, the journey, am! screwed our fiddles up to that leu-ion. but I wmiM gel awful tired if 1 Iia-S ! go as far as Weems and Dr. Felton wouldn't live where I do for any thing. Tie- doctor is .virrv for me, and 1 am .-oiiy lor WVeius, and he is sorry for MMii.-h.xiy Im-ouiI him. but our sym pathy i-wasleti 'I here is lots of sym pathy unveil mi tin.- world, but it shows a gooil iie:ut to have it. A the burden is, m tin .-iivngrli hhall be. If labor is reward -d il 5- all right Howiitlid says he dmi'l iii'ikI pit.!. tig fodder at all it it don't get uci ai'.l -.;ijii in the curing. C'onlci:iiiii'iii i., what. v); all want, and the poor man can be as contented as the rich otii! if ins labor is rewarded a iva.-oii.i!,l: r.-u.-ii'l. 'S'lien it is willing labor 1'hi wiieiniiaii io-s on duty willing!) al inuiii''iit. The doctor hears the door L-eli ring wiiliugiy when deep sleep h:t- po--e-.-cd him on a cold and stoi'im ii'ght. The inghl editor of the daili p-i.i is a willing slave to the lamp. hoi true man will screw his courage up to the sticking oiut if the reward ir1 in sight. The Humorous lieeturer. A humorous lecturer is reported by the Philadelphia Tunes as relating this incident: "I gave the show iu the hotel dining room and hal eveiybody roaring with laughter except one awfully sedate looking iuuii. 1 tried my funniest gags upon him and was wild to awaken a gurgle, or at Ica-t a smile. But all in vain. H:s face was a solemn as a tombstone throiigu il all. After the show, hi.wcter. fancy my -jiirprise to see the melancholy m , n come up ami give me a conyratulary shake. 1 must thank you. .-ir. lor a very pleasant even ing- Your performance was very clever. I almost laughed, sir.' " Aitfiuu- Ward u-ed to teil a similar but a much better story. He said that once while ou a lecture tour night found him at a niiiall town in Nevada. Iu the landlord of the hotel he recog nized a friend of his boyhood who gave him a hearty greeting. Supper over the landlord "said to his guest: "Now, Brown, we hardly ever have any show of any kind in this place, and 1 don't think we ever had a lecture. Can't yon give us your lecture up in the ball room? It will please the people mighti ly, and I'll take it as a great favor if you will." With characteristic good nature Artemus consented. The ball room was well filled when he rose to speak, aud before he had been on his feet a minute he made an observation which provoked a roar of laughter. At which the landlord, his face white with rage, rose and advanced toward the platform with the remark, "One min ute, Mr. Brown." Artemus- -paused, and the landlord having taken his place beside him drew a revolver from his back pocket, and, addressing the au dience, said: "Ladies and gentlemen, the speaker is a particklar friend of mine aud if he's interrupted agin d me if 1 don't shoot You can proceed. 3dr. Brown." Artemus proceeded, and although he gave them his funniest lecture he reported that there was after ward no further "interruption." N. T. 2'rtbune. Writing Under Pressare. In a chat the other day with a gentle man well-known in the literary world, he told me a number of entertaining things iu connection with his literary experience. I asked him, among other things, whether he had ever written anything under high pressure. We had been talking inspiration, but 1m pur posely misconstrued my meaning in the reply he made. , "Yes," he said. "I once wrote a poem of forty lines in as many minutes, and it wasn't a bad poem cither. It was a case of compulsory composition and taxed me more than I had ever been taxed before or since. I had sent to a certain magazine a poem en titled 'The Light-House in a Storm. Not hearing about it for almost a year, 1 concluded that it hail been declined. I then had it put in a literary weekly of which I was the editor, and had a tine engraving made of it The page was made up. and just about to go tha electrotypers, wheu the magazine for the month arrived, and upon opening it there was the poem. A cold chill ran up my back or down it, I'm not cer tain which. Of course it couldn't ag? pear in the other journal but there was the engraving, the forty lines of I space, tho form ready to go the electro- typers! I ran np to the composing room. Can you bold that form for half an hour?' 1 asked of the. foreman. Til trv.' he said. 1 da-hed off another light-house poom (o as to utilize the j engraving), had it iiiM-ricd, and was relieved ot my embarrassment It was I entirely dillerent from the other poem." 1 "And which was ilm best poem?" I asiced. "lhe otic which 1 was com pelled to write," he said. "If I was in spired I wau't eonxeious of it Fm sure. I'll show you hot It poems some day. and vou can judge for yourself." Ftiladelpltia Call. m m The Nogro Laborer. There has been much written of late about the negro as a tenant aud labor er, and many position) taken by the various writers, and as a sample of his industry and thrift the following speaks for itself: Within the a-t week 1 have seen numbers of them driving into town in all kinds of vehicles loaded with fod der, and I made it my buniuess to in vestigate, wheu about the following dia logue ensued: "Old man, what arc vou going to do With that fodder?" "I'se gwine to sell Yin." "What for?" "I needs er little meat, and thought I'd bring this here fodder up aud sell em" "It seems to me, old man, that you would need that fodder next winter aud spring." "I knows dat boss, but yer see I must have a little meat to work on." "What are vou doing on the farm now?" "WelL yer see, we's done laid by der crop and dar ain't nulb'n' now to do," "While yon are doing nothing at home, why not work out by the day and make enough to buy your meat and other provisions?" "Well, l'se worked hard all disyer and I wants some rest" Then you intend to sit at home idle all the summer and eat up what you have made and what you will need so much next spring?" "I can't work all the time, and I must have some meat" This is the way they da Before they will hire out for wages they will sell the last thing they have around them, including chickens, except the dog, which must be kept in the family at any cost When the first of January, 1887, comes these same darkies will pounce down on the landlord for credit, and he will have to buy com and fodder for them. They will trade off the last bushel of corn for tobacco or flimsy tog gery and useless articles. Augusta (Oa.) Chronicle. m The Better Part of Valor. "There, I think that will fix him," said tbe editor of a Dakota paper to the foreman. "Here is what 1 say: 'Tho miserable, cowardly, sneaking whelp who makes a sickening and disgusting effort to edit the daub known to the half-dozen or so who are aware it is published here as the Corktown Morgue, irinted another batch of base and silly ies about us last week. We take this occasion to give the above-mentioned howling idiot notice that we shall shoot him on sight We have stood all of it we propose to. Wc shall go armed, and the lunk-headed. over-grown calf had better keep out of our sight if he values his miserable, worthless life' " "Hold on," said the foreman, looking out of the .window, "bettor get out your gun, he's coming now." "Why, good morning. Major, come in," said the bloodthirsty journalists, laying down the manuscript "I was reading over one of my editorials in which I call upon Congress to quit tariff-tinkering and get down to the crying needs of the country. Its dis gusting the way it neglects business. 5n't it?" "It is for a fact I propose to refer to it myself this week. Well, can't stop now." "O, don't be in a hurry, sorry we can't do anything for you to-day. Well, good morning. Major." "Good morning." Estelline Dak. Bell. Tbe Bailiff Insulted Him. Here is a ftfory that is too good to keep. I have a young friend. I will call him Snodgrass because that is not his name. Now Snodgrass has very large ideas and a very small income. His list of creditors is as long as the Declaration of Independence. The same might be said of tbe faces of vari ous and sundry collectors. It seems to be generally agreed that in the manage ment of these financial affairs Snod grass is not to do any of the walking. Snodgrass occupies what he calls a sweet" of rooms, the "root" to which is up a dusty stairway. To be fashion able Snodgrass sleeps late. The other morning the boy who sweeps up tbe "sweet of rooms for Snodgrass inad verantly left the door open, and a bail iff got in with a view to levying a fi. f a. on the goods and chattels of Snodgrass. Snodgrass was asleep, and the bailiff hook him gently. Snodgruss awoke and demanded why he had been aroused. "Mr. Snodgrass," said the bailiff, "it is a painful duty, but I have come to levy a fi. fa." "Why, man," exclaimed Snodgrass. angrily, "what do you mean by disturb ing a gentleman in this fashion? Go in to the next room, there, and wait till I finish my morning nap." The bailiff withdrew, Snodgrass turned over and slept for an hour, during which the patient bailiff wait ed. Gentle reader, do you think you know Snodgrass? Perhaps you know one of him. His name "is legion. Atlanta Conttitution. Mike Waii Bad. "Mrs. Murphy, do yez ftmember the time whin that son Moikeof yours toled the dure of our shanty one marn in and Dinny bad togotoworruk through the chimbly?" "Dade, and oi do. Wasn't it meeilf that whaled him fur't wid all the stringth oi had in me hand?" "An' do yez call to moind the time whin that same Moike did be puttin our baby in the coal-bucket an' bang in1 av him up in the p'ach three in the front yarrud?" "Arrah, now, an' wasn't it his own father that broke his cane to shplinthera over 'is boick fur that t brick?" "An' have yez in mind the episody whin he put the red pipper on the parr lor sthove, when me daughter Bridget married Patsy Rafferty?" Be aisy wid ye. It wor meself shure as held tbe b'y while 'is father played St Pathrick's Day' an 'iin wid a bid shlat Phwat do yez be comin at?" "Well, oive just found a' soign over me dure which sez on it "Chinase Laun dry' wid some baste av a haythen name to top, and oi cem over in all nayborli ness to ax yez if you couldn't lcindlj whale the divil out av Moike wid crowbar.1' Merchant Traveler. - m e Home Amenities Husband: These berries, my dear, I believe are from Florida. 1 am told that they are ship ped here in refrigerator cars. They have certainly come a long way." Wife: "Yes, and they would certainly go much further if you wouldn't help yourself so liberally.'" Texan Siftings. m i Chinaman are to establish a new town near Yreka, CaL, to be settled ex clusively by Mongolians. TIIK CHICAGO SHORT LINE OK THE , Milwaukee anil St. Ml Railway. THE BEST ROUTE From OMAHA and COUNCIL BLUFFS to the: east. to Train Duly Mvms Oaiu, Ccaactl mutts, Chicago, and- Milwaukee, St. Paul, Minneapolis, Cedar Rapids, Clinton, Dubuque, Davenport, Rock Island.Freeport, Rockford, Elgin, Madison, Janesville, Beleit, Winona, La Crosse. Auit all other Important l'nintt E.tat, Northeast and Souttic:il 'or through tickets call on the Ticket Agent at Columbus, NV!r:iilc;.. PULX3IAN SLKkPKKS ami tin- Kl.NKbT DlNlftO Caks IN 'lilK Wokli arc run ou the main lines of the Chicago. .VIII--vratakee 4k. Ml. Paal feVy, and every attention Is paid to p:iMtencr.N 1 cour teous employe of the 4'ompany. t. Miller, A. V. II. f'urpvtatcr, tieueral Mau ger. tieu'l Ta-js. Atj't. J. a Tarker, Cfe. II. lleitllord. Am't Gea'l Alan. As't Pass. Ay't. Jt. T. Clwrk, Cteii'l Sttp'l. Feb. I T.l LOUIS SCHREIBER, u All kind of Rep:iii'ii done ou Short Notice. Buggies, Wag ons, etc., Made to order, aad all work tiuar auteed. Also tell the world-famous Waller A. Wood Mowers, Reapers, Combin ed Machines, Harvesters, and 8elf-bindrs the best made. "Shop opposite the "Tatters!!," on Olive St., COLUM BUS. 'M-m TRASH'S SELECTED SHORE TMSKX3 THKOftKHMALana ONLY CNUINK! no otner PATENTS I'A YEATS, TfiAl)E MARKS AND COPYRIGHTS Obtained, and all other business in thn U. S. Patent OlHce attended to for MOD EKATEFEES. Our office itt opposite the (I. S. Patent Office, and we cau obtain Patents iu less time than those remote from WASHING TON. Send MODEL OR DKAWlNti. We advise as to patentability free of charge; aud we make NO CHANGE UNLESS WE OBTAIN PATENT. We reter here to the Postmaster, the Supt. of Money Order Div., and to ottii cials of the U.S. Patent Office. For cir culars, advice, terms and references 16 actual clients in your own Statu or county, write to ;. A. KNOW o.. Opposite Patent Office, Washington, D.O. THE Chicago Herald AND . COLUMBUS JOURNAL. The COLUM HUN JOURNAL. once a weet, and the Chicago Herald, onve a day, for oue year, tfl.M. The JOUKKAL and the Weekly Herald, oue vear, $4.73. Address, II. K. Turnkij & Co., PimaybG-x Columbus, Nebr. TTX1T Tfor workiujj people. Send in H 111 I i K cents postage, and we will JX.I il JX maii y nu free, a loyal, val uable sample box of goods that will put you in the way of making inor money in a few days than you ever thought po hible at any business. Capital not re quired. You can live at home and work in spare time only, or all the time. All ofbothaexes, or all age, grandly suc cessful. 50 cents to $." easily earned every evening. That all who want work may test tbe business, wo make this un paralleled offer: To all who are not well satisfied we will send 1 to pay for the trouble of writing us. Full particulars, directions, etc., tent free. Immense pay absolutely uure for all who start at once. Don't delay. Address Stissom ,V Co., Portland. Maine. OMAHA WEEKLY REPUBLICAN CLUBBING UATES. HEBEAFTER we will furnish to both our old and nero subscribers, the Omaha Weekly Republican and Jouk xav st the very low rate of 2.73 per year, thus placing within the reach ol all the best btate and county weeklies pub lished, giving the reader the condensed, general and foreign telegraphic and state news of tbe week. Try fur a year and be satisfied. ;iiiy.VN;-tf TJCtjfepAMR) A book of 100 page. llEiHOrArArV Th best book for an 'AnUTIITIfilNC ault' be "e exP?ri MWfCtnB Wllia.... or otherwise. It contains lists of newspapers and estimates of the coat of adverUfllnr.The advert iserwho wants to spend one dollar. flnl8 hi it the in formation he requires, while forbiin who will Invest ono hundred thousand dollars lu ad vertising, a jtcbeine is indicated which will meet his every requirement, or am oevuide todosobytligktclMnaettasily arrimtat bycor rttpondettte. ICt editions have been issued. Sunt post-paid, to any address for 10 cents. Write to UKO. P. KOVVELL A CO., NEWSPAPER ADVERTISING BUREAU. (ISSpniosSLPrlntlngUoaseSq.), New York. n on Ble In PhlleselshU at the Newspaper Adver tttlngAgracy of Means. Snix3SBSu our sntBongen agents. Ctaie Braianfl Warn Maker &1 w '.nP- TjfrF cl autcoSb eocnt vox thzm. FREE LAND! FOK FARMERS & STOCKMEN lust beyond tht Nebraska line on the Platte Kiver. The Country is Wonderfully Productive. ('heap Laids for sale ih Ike vicinity ol Ike lively towi of Sterliig. Grand Openings for all kinds of Basi nets. Present population of Town 500. JSTSend for circular to PACKARD & KINO, W-y Sterling, Weld Co., Colorado. ESTABLISHED IN I860. TIIK NATIONAL REPOBLICAN, WASHINGTON, D.c. Dally, except Sundays." Price, $.. per year in udranee, postage free. TIIK WEEKLY IATI8IAL HIM. Devoted to general new, and original matter obtained from the Department of Aiiculture nnd other I'epai tment-i of IbeCoveruineut, relating to the firiuiu ami planting interest-. An Adoc:t!e of Republican principles, rexiewing fearles'ly and fairly tbe :ut of Coiigrei and the National ",Vdniini tralion Price. 4tl.no per year in advance, postage tree. K. W. KOX. President ami Jlanag-r. - The National Ukpubucan and the Columbus Journal, 1 year, S2..10. :s-v Cures Guaranteed! DR. "WARNS SPECIFIC No. 1. A Certain Cure for Nervous Debility, Seminal Weakness, Involuntary Ktui's finns, Spermatorrhoea, and all diseases ot the genito-uriuary organ- caused by self., abuse or over indulgence. Price, $t itdper box. six boxes 4UI.00. DR. WARNS SPECIFIC No. 2. For Epileptic Fits, Mental Anxietv, Loss of Memory, Softening of the Bruin, and all those diseases of the brain. PrUe $1.00 per box, six boxes $.".0. DR. WARNS SPECIFIC No. 3. For Impotence, Sterility iu either sex. Loss of Power, premature old age, and all those diseases requiring a thorough iu igorating of the sexual nriraus. Price. $'J.(h) per box, six boxer. flU.iMi. DR. WARM'S SPECIFIC No. 4. For Headache, Ncrvoiit Neuralgia, and all acute diseases of the nervous system. Price r()c per box, six boxes $2..10. " DR. WARNS SPECIFIC No. 5. For all diseases caused by the over-use of tobacco or liquor. This remedy is par ticularly etHcacious iu avertiug palsy and delirium tremens. Price $I.IW) pur 'mix, six boxes $5.00. We Guarantee a Cure, or agree to re fund double the money paid. Certificate iu each box. This guarantee applies to each of our live Specifics. Sent by mail to any address, secure from observation, ou receipt of price. He careful to mention the number of Speeilic wanted. Our Specifics are only recommended for spe cilie diseases, lieware of remedies war ranted tti cure all these diseases with ujio medicine. To avoid counterfeits and al ways secure tue genuine, order only fr.m DOWTV 4c chin:, D HUG GISTS, Columbia, Neb. !!-! Heal is Wealth! Da K.C.WST8 Nuite and Bituw TrouT HZXT, a guaranteed specilio far Hysteria. Dizzi ness. Convulsions, fits. NetToua. Neuralgia. Headache, Nervous Prostration caused by the uaa of alcohol or tobacco. Wakefulness, Mental De pression, Softening of the lirain resulting jp sanity and leading to misery, decay and izzri Pwmatnr Old Ago. Barrenness, I?5l"l In either sex. Involuntary Loss-f r2Jr orrhcea caused by over-oxertio.- ' tfSf: abase or over-indulgence., JV J?0 S& oneaaonuYa treatmeV a ?"? !? fori? OOl tent by tp-1 prepaidon receipt of pneo. mc CiFaJtAOTEB SIX BOXES TocnreJCMe- With each order received byaa for .u. boxes, accompanied with S&bO. wo will Sudthe purchaser our written guarantee to re fund the money if the treatment doeauot effect, core. Guarantees issued only by JOHN O. WEST & CO., M2 W. MADISON ST., CHICAGO, ILLS., Solo Prop's West's Liver Pills. in presents given uicay. Send us .1 cents postage. iUUU anu by man you win get free a package of goods of largo value, that will start you in work that will at once bring you'in money faster thanauy thinu else in America. All about the $200,000 in presents with each box.. Ajjentx wanted everywhere, of either, sex, of all ages, for all the time, or spare time only, to work for us at their own homes. Fortunes for all workers ab solutely assured. Don't delay. 11. IIal LKTT & Co., Portland. Maine. S50O REWARD! WS will par tha rrmrd fcf uy ef Un CoahatS Py,fri.8faSlfcilich.lUi1ioiiCoaOpllnn ot Cmtlw s caaMAraah WaU'aYtfrtttil Lin Pill,, vbra S tin taM (tried? complM with. Tbrf r putty TCpUbb, u MtlJlttTMiUhrUnn. ( Cwtad. Luf koiM.ua. nui(npoiilaai. wr mat ey tu drofOU. amroaf MttorfaSa u lllltlnao. Tks fOMla pfrUfd aaly by von v. u( m vu, hi m ws w. tuaxio 04.. Ck pwahlsiilisi ml oj will iwyiMiBnmti S1A.t1IIII2L.L. St CO. DEALERS IN & Eas and Iron ! " The highest market price paid lor rags and iron. Store in the I? 11 bach building, Olive St.. Columbus. Neb. 15-tf bkt 1 pay 1 h, trnrior$3i)inajr EiibcrMi.youuicorold- Capital not icuulf 1. You ate Martd fit. Tho who ttart at ouca an aUoluUIj vo uf mutf littfa fuitoucs, AUIiUf. :t-v "1TTTT1T more money than at auytblu iy I l else by taking an agency for "J--- tbe best selling book out. Be- ginners succeed grandly. None fell. Terms free. Oaixsxt Book Co., Port land, Msise. 4-8Z-J a" HlBBlHBISv o jig "lllJM; So-06J3"S I ."""cSa: HI g3s.p&la: I )7MS.S.rSi P3 BJ s?S3 cbS- n 'e S2 e SvTo 2.5 'ae O - M.A A ?rEsflfaf nun ft f T T BeM r (carre, bat tbnu bn write to 1 1 1 1 I I IUnKnAV,lortluid..Mitiiic,illmi I II I Ifrce, full Inlofnutkia obuit wk. m llllllll tnjr cmn do, mil li, at ttoiue.lbot wil " MtMSS thctu from IA to S.3 ran da . Nm k X
